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and happy birthday Sega. Alright, now the world premiere of a project that depicts the entire story
of a famous anime from beginning to end. Dedicate your heart to this.
Nured up. One Piece.
Dragon Ball Z.
Ronma
Lupin the third
They just spoiled the entire cartoon. This shit's been out for years, bruh.
I can't follow him.
As expected of a titan.
That's a shame.
We'll have to deal with the rest later.
We'll have to deal with the rest later.
We'll have to deal with the rest later.
We'll have to deal with the rest later.
Thank you.
I'm sorry.
You sucked them all. Oh
Word
I guess sucked every dick
From many of the creative leaders behind forza horizon comes a new cinematic open world driving experience
A bit late to the SGF.
Bro, I got...
I watched a little bit of a pro online, man.
I'm gonna tell you, I did not miss shit, bro.
Holy moly.
Nowhere runs to run
We have two drivers dead
Three more in intensive care
I'm done
My friend said you can help me
Some people are meant to be outlawed, Theo
Think about it
I did work for you to get out of trouble, now I'm in deep with it when I start it.
Bro you're going in a circle in a fast car dog.
I'm trying to help you.
I'm not going to jail for you.
Dude, what?
You wouldn't get it, stairs left.
Mount Bladeprait.
I think I got a move of fire move of fire
The Royston's ult's on!
Hehehehe
That's so cool
You can just be a guy, dude!
Oh, not in the dig.
Dude, mountain blade creator's sweating right now, dude.
We have lots more summer game first ahead, and trust me, trust me, you definitely will
want to stick around.
Barcode looking clean today at sea of remnants from netties
Yes, and I should he crossfire trailer dude you believe I should
Holy walk of no lady that's gonna go hard in the Chinese leg
It's a game to start a new life
Make it hard, make it hard for me
And I promise all things in this fight
If you start walking in a state where you're still the smartest
Make it loud, say we're lost in a stream
Some will fade and drift away
But it's not the legs that choose
I'll remember all of you
Claims of shut up now
Nothing will burn but a dime
It's a moment to sleep
tonight
Just sing it
Dude, it's a turn-based RPG.
Nobody playin' that shit.
In a room?
On a shelf?
Uh, guys, is it me or is there something off with this one?
Yeah, he seems...different.
Because he always had that mustache?
He doesn't have a mustache.
Oh yeah.
Hey, buddy.
into that Chun Lee's face.
Howdy dookin, dude. Yeah!
100% authentic real deals on Solotox Chenli
she's the third bogeyman offwind dude
I'm pretty sure we've literally played this mission recently.
Machi Pukai, thanks for so...
Wait, it's Poki Man.
It's Poki Man, guys.
I love Poki Man.
You gotta go kill the legendary Poki Man.
To save the world.
throw another ball dude don't pull out the blinkers just keep throwing out your
Pokemon. Don't invest in it, guys.
Ooh, 1.5, dude.
Too bad this game's fucking woke.
There you have it, Pow World 1.0 is coming out on July 10th.
Now at the start of the show I mentioned we'll have lots of new worlds to explore today and
the return of some long-awaited ones as well.
This next game falls into that last category.
It's been a long, long, long, eight years.
I never played the first one, guys.
I'll have your job within the week.
Are you living under a rock?
You're a raging dumpster fire of a person.
Here there is and I'm here.
Nobody played this?
Yeah, a lot of people played their game.
Ready to get to work?
Der Luminati.
Amogus.
Oh, did they touch it up a little bit?
Why do you say it's so cute, Leigh?
Leigh?
That's right Bigby is finally back and as we wait for his new adventure in 2027
check out the wolf among us remastered this holiday. Now this next game comes
from an acclaimed studio. Actually watching Game Fest live. A lot of you guys
already watching it. One, two, the Gothic sponsor technically begins at 430.
So I figured why the fuck not.
Also, I watched a little bit before stream.
Oh, it's a sponsored stream, Lane?
Let's be clear.
I was gonna play Gothic 1 regardless of being sponsored, and it is not a sponsored stream.
It is a Gothic 1 stream.
And tomorrow, Gothic 1 stream.
Monday, Gothic 1 stream.
Tuesday, gothic one stream.
I'm listening.
How much money do they give you?
They've sponsored me for two hours today, so...
Have I played the original now?
I've never played them.
Oh, yeah.
It's not a fresh tradition in a while, aren't you?
A little...
The overly audio may be doubled, by the way.
seeing weird things okay take it easy fake polish person do govics got a huge
in europe by zero they should so
do you guys see the trailer for a good look IDQD do you see the trailer for that
That weird
Rap to zombie game
What the fuck was that called?
cap of y this is a bit
Last Harbor do that that whole trailer look like it was a
Oh my god, if I know that.
It was like, un-cannily, uh...
I don't get the bug. I don't get the bug.
You see, 2-Bug is back. No, I didn't see 2-Bug. I didn't see 2-Bug.
Did they make him sing and dance?
Oh, here's the next Yakuza game.
Which one?
Stranger than Heaven?
Dude, her ass was jiggling.
Why Japanese goons love
I can never hear like the woke crab complain about these games probably because they're in body suits, right?
That was a good one shift
of stellar blade with an all-new sequel developed entirely by the original team that's here today
Set in the same universe as stellar blade this next chapter continues the story beyond the events of the first game
Introducing a new protagonist who you saw there Evie. It's early in development and we will have more to share in the future
All right, we're almost done, but not quite.
It's been almost exactly three years since Street Fighter 6 was released in June 2023.
What's ahead? This is Street Fighter 6, Year 4.
Street Fighter 6 is already entering year 4, but I can sense that we already have new
Challengers on the horizon
They got the animatronics
Okay, I don't really care. Who's the guy who goes, uh?
Every 40-year-old millennial...
Oh, dude! Oh, fuck, dude! Oh, fuck!
Yeah, yeah, oh, yeah! I remember!
Nakayama-san's director of Street Fighter 6.
You can hear him in the crowd, dude.
Director of Square Enix.
Who's the name of the British guy and Street Fighter?
There's Backswing Blow.
Got a trash. Who's that guy, Dudley?
Dude, I don't give a fuck about anything.
He put Dudley in the air.
anniversary and today we're announcing this special collaboration with Final Fantasy.
I'm going to talk about any of these characters, man.
Tifa is a character loved by the players all around the world.
That's exactly why our goal was this, to bring to life a Tifa who truly fights within the world
of Street Fighter 6.
Everything from her design to movement has been rebuilt as Tifa, the Street Fighter.
Materia has also been reimagined as a new gameplay system.
We cannot show it today,
but we adapted an iconic Final Fantasy element
to the battle experience.
You shut up all these people talking!
Shut the fuck up of the crowd!
We hope you all look forward to what's coming next.
Thank you to Hamaguchi-san and Nakayama-san for coming all the way from Japan for that
special moment on stage.
They will see you guys again later this year.
Alright, well now it has come time for our final announcement.
I know.
What's it gonna be guys?
Any guesses?
Frankly, I don't know what I could say to set this moment up besides this
Get ready
For the next battle final battle
A shadow run it upon our planet I need that
Guided by calamity one man sought dominion through reunion. It's separate his will
A meteor, called forth to bring blue into law.
But our planet answered.
Awakening mighty weapons to stand against the celestial threat.
Now, it's open doors in those who fight.
Except you don't really, they don't really help us.
You go and treat their ass.
Worlds in trouble, it has been for a while.
So what are we waiting for? Let's give Sephiroth a beating of a lifetime.
He's coming up on the idea guys!
You're mine.
Come like this quick.
Good night.
The scars, the light!
If I can do this, I'll make you proud!
Just end your day.
Oh my, is that a weapon I see?
Or as I can tell, these things don't distinguish between friend and foe.
Save the plen by killing off the deck.
How does that work?
How does that work?
Put your faith to the test,
there's a lot left and I won't let you down I promise
There you have it, I know he's not going to join me in welcoming me back to Summergaming
with the director of Final Fantasy 7, Revelation, Naoki, I'm a Gucci-san!
I'm back!
Do you speak English?
Never mind!
That'd be like if I wouldn't give a presentation in Japan and I got up on stage and I said,
Konichiwa!
Truly delighted to unveil Final Fantasy VII Revelation, which is launching simultaneously on all platforms.
And we've only been able to come this far thanks to every single one of you who continue
to believe in this story and waited for this moment with us.
The central theme of this title is Resolve.
Cloud and his companions each confront their own destinies and find the resolve to march
towards the final battle.
I too have carried a promise in my heart throughout this journey.
The resolve to see the series through to its very end.
That's fine.
We're committed to delivering this experience in its ultimate form.
Please stay with us and witness what lies beyond that resolve.
Today, to help guide us on our path, please show me and welcome to the stage
the voice of Vincent Valentine, Matt Russell.
I was expecting a cooler character in the others.
Thank you very much, Hamaguchi-san.
It's truly a privilege to be here with you today, if you know me.
There's honestly so much to see in Revelation, I think we just kind of need to dive right
in.
What do you say?
Rithgui.
Rithgui.
Rithgui.
Rithgui.
Rithgui.
Rithgui.
Rithgui.
Rithgui.
As we reunite with our heroes, the meteor looms in the skies above, a constant reminder of your mission.
And the grave threats you'll confront as you embark upon your journey and face the epic conclusion of the remake series.
Abort the highway to your very own airship, pride of the Shinra fleet.
You'll take to the skies and witness our most expansive open world yet.
From the outskirts of Midgarner, to the sun-drenched Medeo archipelago, to the warrior nation of Wutai.
Simply pick a direction and set sail.
But how can you be expected to protect the whole world at once?
You need to cover ground fast.
I'm not jumping! No way you know how!
Don't worry, this pair shoots your top of the line.
Pull the cord and pop! You'll be floating through the air like a feather.
At any moment in the open world, simply pilot the high wind to your destination and take
a leap of faith.
With the wind rushing past, you'll descend seamlessly from the sky above to the ground
below.
Where will the winds guide you first?
That freedom is in your hands.
But no matter your destination, to defeat your enemy, you'll need a fighting chance.
And that starts with your trusted allies.
It's Rubenstein!
Long last with the world teetering on a blade's edge everyone assembles a cloud side forming an epic ensemble of heroes
That was our Rupus. It's Rupus!
Which is their own story that brings you closer together than ever
But a good unit needs more than friendship to save the day. It needs a disciplined combat regimen
The hybrid battle system established in Remain and refined in Rebirth is perfected in Revelation
Putting even more power in your hands
In fluid real-time action, seamlessly switch between party members to even the odds.
Then, when the fight calls for strategy, enter tactical mode to unleash a suite of powerful new spells and abilities.
Activate devastating synergies with your companions.
And of course, call on mighty summoned entities that can turn the tide of battle.
I
Summoning Efrid never gets old
There are truly some chill inducing fights ahead in revelation
I'm so excited to see all of your reactions. It's gonna be amazing
I'm guessing you have a favorite character to pray in battles
I might be a little biased, but since you brought it up, let's have a look at our newest
coffin-dwelling companion, Vincent Valentine.
I won't return to my coffin until we've put Sephiroth in his.
is a depth gunslinger, capable of delivering precise high yield shots.
Hold on.
There's more to this secretive former Turk in this town.
The Turk gets high-gass in a lot of here.
As a result of experimentation at the hands of Shinra,
Vincent can transform into the Galleon beast of the Tresquiline,
gaining tremendous power while transformed.
And with combined with the skills of a certain ace pilot,
their high-impact synergies disrupt the fight with ferocious results.
The Leap and Lancer, the Dash and Ragoon, the one and only Sid Highwind!
Sid Highwind, the cantankerous pilot extraordinaire, joins the party and their mission to defeat
Sephiroth.
Sid's command of his lance allows him to rapidly close the distance for powerful strikes, or
engage in sweeping area of effect attacks to bring a whole host of enemies to heal, but
to fully control the battlefield, skill with a weapon only gets you so far.
To further augment your combat capabilities, try this on for seconds.
Function Integrated Tactical Suitwear, or the FITS system for short, allows you to further
customize your play style with new uniforms and be with unique movesets.
Alongside your equipment and materia, FITS gives you an extra edge in battle.
And to face what's coming, you'll need all the strength you can muster.
Yeah, but should Kinship Pass Fire 5?
Sensing its fate hanging in the balance, the planet itself has unleashed its last line of
Defense the weapons ancient beasts that are larger than life
You and your friends must unite in revelation we come to the thrilling conclusion of the final fantasy 7 saga
And your mission is clear. I have a question. Equip your materia did they stand together?
get
the last time
Google your address
please
boys
Well, thank you all. Thank you, Hamaguchi-san, for bringing us this extended look at Final Fantasy 7.
Did they do the amnesia art for Cloud already in the remakes? That's my question.
I hate to leave us the last game.
Is that right?
Well then, you better take a look.
How do they fit that in there, dude?
I guess there was a point during the the trailer where you're playing as the
uh, Sidman, uh, Vincent Oly?
Holy moly.
At last, the promise is fulfilled, the journey ends here.
Wow, they did it.
Wow.
There you have it, Final Fantasy VII Revelation coming to all platforms next spring, which
which is appropriate for today because SGF is really a celebration of games across all
platforms.
Thank you to Hamaguchi-san, Kiru-san, and the team at Square for that very special announcement.
And thanks to Lucy for a great job, Kousi.
Didn't she do great?
Thanks, Jeff.
What an amazing way to end the show, but that's not all, because coming up right now is Day
of the Devs with a look at many new independent game titles, including multiple new game announcements.
That's right.
Nah.
Watch the Resident Evil trailer.
I
Miss resident evil and stranger than heaven with Tupac. I
Don't fucking care man. I'm gonna be honest. I do care about the coffee. I'm about to get them. I'll be right back
What's like guards plays?
Uh, no, I got the music. I got the music. I'll bring my quotes back.
Yes, below.
Yeah
you
you
you
you
you
you
you
you
you
you
You
So
you
What up?
What was that?
Browser source?
They restarted the Shreve.
I wanted to go back and watch the Tupac trailer, but
maybe I can find it, hang on.
Get it up and get real high.
What's going on?
Tupac reveal.
Dude.
How long is the trailer? Is it like a minute?
Oh my god, do I try?
I'm going to use my life.
I'm going to use my life.
If I don't use my life, my life won't begin.
What the fuck dude he's alive
Let's freaking go dude
Welcome to the moon moon show
What's on the docket for today?
Gothic 1 Remake.
So, before we begin the sponsored segment,
Some of you may recall a little game called of action steel.
Great game.
Yeah.
Yeah.
You spent so long on that game.
Yeah.
Ha ha ha.
Yep.
The reason I bring it up is because the most common
common in my Twitch chat while I was playing that beautiful Russian game
was you should just play gothic this game is worse gothic one
I'm.
Giggle lag. Sorry. I'm.
Setting up right now. I'm.
And so I said, yeah, one day I'll play gothic one.
I'm going to get really mad.
Did Hitman for Linter make you respect Sweden more or less?
I'm pretty sure it's pretty sure it's made by Denmark Denmark.
Same shit. Hmm.
I don't think so, guys.
Can you ban him? No.
he doesn't know he doesn't know
mm-hmm
they're making missions of 007 like the M&M shit
I think it's is to pocket of being it or what
There's an among us show now, I saw that I saw that
On paramount plus anyone got a subscription to paramount plus I can borrow
I'm going to be playing all the five-faces seven games next year and now the third one's going to release.
So realistically, if I'm going to play any of the FF7, I play the first one, the first remake.
Skip the second one.
I might play the third one, but I am not going to play the second one.
And I honestly, I don't think I need to.
I don't think I need to.
You just want to see how they end up.
Correct.
Not wrong.
You don't need to.
I know I don't.
And I super omega don't need to, because I know, I mean, if you look at the
presentation that they just did, a lot of it was a recap.
An out loud recap, so.
There's probably an emphasis on that.
Which negates my need to play the middle one.
Which one do you dress like a woman in?
Mmm, you must be speaking of the first game where you infiltrate the brothel to rescue Tifa or some shit, I forget who.
Who played that one?
That's in Breath of the Wild
What?
What do you play Slop, Witcher on release but refuse to play the real one? Omega laughing
Low tier bait.
Damn, that chatter instantly wished a car accident on the gate.
And speaking of car accidents, what better time to begin the sponsored segment
than right now?
Thank you, THQ Nordic.
There they are, dude.
Already launched in, uh, changed me settings a little bit.
That might be too loud, sir.
Custom.
Or am I dead?
Not to begin.
The Kingdom of Matana, united by King Robar II.
During the long years of his reign, he was able to defeat all foes of his will.
Do we 5?
Loadsnakes.
airline, which means I could be a great warrior.
Oh no.
I was forced to work in the all minds of Pyrimus.
Wait.
To make it impossible for them to escape.
The king sent out the best magicians of the kingdom to create a magic barrier around the palace.
Wait, so they lost the war against the orcs and they're enslaving people to get ore for the orcs's tribute.
Right.
Ah, something disturbed the delicate stranger of magic.
Oh, they're still fighting.
We retract.
inside our own barrier. During the years, there were many attempts to open a barrier but
nothing worked nobody could get out one second of negligence was enough for the
business
wait a second the Valley of Mind was now under the control of the conference
We thought we got him by the balls. He has to pay.
Here, here, here. I have no choice. He had to negotiate.
We need the orb.
What is this pacing? So this shatter is a, it's called a cutscene, and in it it usually establishes like story elements of a video game.
Oh Jesus!
It's me!
I'm the hero.
They haven't seen just like this in like an ultimate game.
Except they kill the person.
Freedom.
very well I will take your letter on one condition spare me the rest of his
nonsense
how dare you keep silent
yeah send him in
back to us
why don't we get a lift like everyone else
Why did they throw us in there, dude?
Are these my Bandito homies?
I'm a hero.
You're a green blood, and I'm the guy who takes care of you a lot.
Let's leave it at that.
Now, if you plan on staying alive in here, you should stay and chat with me.
me for a minute so I can show you the rocks. Your choice though. If you want to run off
towards a doom, I ain't gonna stop you. What'll it be? We'll do a tutorial.
We like a good tutorial dude.
What do I need to know?
There's stupid break up plans the new campers for example work with the water mages who have convinced them
They can blow up the barrier by channeling the magic of war
They've saved up a pretty pilot nuggets for that and that other camp that would be the swamp camp
We call them the loons. They spend all day smoking swamp weed praying to some guy
They believe we'll need them to freedom so far. He's being rather quiet
Honestly, don't waste your time with these fools the barrier ain't going nowhere
Where that's the first lesson any fresh you should get into his head
Do they even have slurs for us deep I'm a freshen what can you tell me about the barrier other than that?
There's no getting through not much what would happen if I tried to walk out of here
The same that happened to the last fool had that brilliant plan
It would hit you with a lightning bolt so nasty even the scavengers won't touch what's left of you
Everything gets in but nothing that lives goes out again. It's that simple
If there's a way out of here, I'll find it.
So eager to get out of here, huh?
And you only just got here.
If there's not an NPC who's like experimenting with living things, gonna get out of the barrier
by like throwing rats at the barrier and seeing if they get thrown, they're very disappointed.
Tell me more about the old camp.
We control the biggest mine in the valley.
That makes sense.
Rather, our leader, Gomez, the biggest wolf in the cage.
Control the ore, and you control the colony.
some months we send the king a big fat shipment and he sends us whatever we
ask for in return and he's okay with that what's he gonna do send his arm
into a dome it would never get out of again his soldiers were deserted before
they did that we have him by the balls and he knows it you need your piece of
the cake too all you have to do is join our camp you're not the boss of me why
did you help me because you needed help
fiden step 10 there's a chance bullet in his lads would have killed you that's
said I also want to make you an offer I'm listening yes you're a little run-in
with bullet in his lads hopefully showed you that the colonies no place for
lone wolves you want to survive you got to join one of the three camps sooner or
later I'm here to tell you that the old camp is your best bet
well obviously we got to kill this bullet there's this bullet now probably
back in the old camp you just lads came here to pick up the king of Shetland if
If you plan on taking him on, though, be careful.
Sit down, good fighter.
Join the swamp, Huffers.
Your guys just nearly beat me to death.
Why would I join your camp?
Look, kid, I'm not going to stand here and try to win you over.
Yes, Bullet is a bastard, but in a way, what he and his guys did to you
was a good lesson.
Strength and reputation.
Those will be your biggest assets in here.
You, as of now, have neither.
Yeah, that's how it is.
Just know I've been here a long time,
and I'm telling you your best chances are with us.
Take it or leave it. It's all the same to me.
Tell me about Gomez.
Tell me about this Gomez.
What's there to tell?
He's the biggest war baron,
the boss of the old camp,
and the most powerful man on the colony.
Say I want to join Gomez and his guys.
What do I do?
Talk to the warden at the castle entrance.
We got a castle man.
Okay.
Well, we just asked him where to get away. I don't want to embarrass myself by asking again. I'll do it.
Well, you can't take it from the trading post. This is old camp property.
I tried to abandon mine down the canyon though. There's bound to be something.
I don't want to tell this guy those. So I won't.
I'll be going. Thanks for the help. Don't mention it.
Feel free to tag along if you want. If not, see you in the old camp.
One more thing. You can read, can't you?
Take these notes. They might just keep you alive.
I'm low-curcuanually illiterate though.
Is he mad now?
Alright, what's the save button?
save
he was looting me
I'll come back next time.
You just didn't... I didn't have anything you said. Nothing.
I still want to beat it.
No, no, no. No, no, no. Okay.
I'm dead.
My sensitivity is still too high.
I wonder if we ever get a name, or if we will always simply be... Hero.
Brotherhead.
Investigate the source of their magic.
Ancient tomes.
Barefist, blunt damage one.
10 strength, 10 decks, 5 minutes, not very magical.
Okay, we can swim, let's go, let's go.
Time to get some fat loot.
Holy fuck, the bubbles.
I got a hat.
I got some nuggies.
I'm gonna ask you.
Okay, oh god.
I got too much. I'm going up there.
There's one thing I learned from the game that ripped this game off.
Is that giant...
Is that puddle...
The pools of water always have really good show.
Always search the water. Every time.
I wonder if there's like a highlight item. Wooden Spoon.
Oh, they drowned that guy. That's so sad.
Weeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee
One more search.
Those swimming controls were so bad in the original.
original. They're not so bad here. It's hard to tell.
Oh. Yoy.
I got some, I got some swamp weed, dude.
I'm choking.
Did I miss anything?
I can access my inventory in the water.
Oh, it's junk.
The torch is not junk though.
In the OJ game, you move the camera with the keyboard.
Yeah, I mean, that's pretty common for a game from 2001-ish.
Doom didn't have a mouse look for a long time.
Yeah, this is pretty much my favorite thing to do in these games.
Maybe I should get a SCUBA certification.
Blimey, what did I miss?
There's a shotgun down here that I miss.
I want to learn magic.
I think we got everything.
I wonder if we just die when our breath runs out.
Oh fuck, oh fuck!
You do!
It's not like Snake when he was like,
Well I gotta go back in there and get that ship said.
At least we know what's all down.
Wow. Underwater exploration.
Pat, Nuggy, Nuggy, Torch, Kingsweed. There's another Kingsweed.
Swampweed.
Alright, let's get the hell out of here.
What, have you drowned again?
I don't want to do that.
We're out the spoon?
That's the most important part.
Wait, I had to have buy another Pop-Dub.
Maybe I can't quite say while I'm swimming.
Nope.
Yeah.
Wait, no.
You cannot.
Interesting.
stay. I gotta get the spoon hold on. This is someone's most cherished spoon. Got it.
You can save it all while swimming. I mean it makes sense. It makes sense.
Saves.
Okay.
Okay, tab to enter combat mode, seems.
Okay, right click makes me swing with my left arm.
Left click makes me swing with my right.
I don't know how to exit combat mode.
I'm helping.
Oh, there's like an overhead attack?
Yeah.
They call him the lamp lighter.
Bye, bye, bye.
Hold on.
Mayhemps?
Yeah, my other sounds were kinda quiet.
What's up, dude?
I can't talk to him, he hates me bad.
I'm sorry.
I'm sorry.
I'm sorry.
What's up, dude?
I can't talk to him.
He hates me, bad.
Ooh, the outhouse!
Ah, it's covered in shit.
Why are they shooting on the floor?
Maybe it's not.
Nah, that's shit.
Hold?
Nope.
Deliver it.
I wonder if I can like rob these guys.
I can't sleep here.
Hehehehehehe.
Hehehehehehehe.
The fuck?
Exchange them key.
Pickle.
Fuckin' robs you.
sleep in the bed no man cuz they're gonna come in and be like hey you can't sleep
here this isn't your home
you think you'll see me you like you like
I'm sorry I'm sorry
Just put it on the ground.
Give it back.
Fine.
I'm dropping it.
They're robbing me.
Next time it's gonna hurt from real.
Oh, they only took the beer. You learn fast. That's my...
Iron man, im not going to get in.
They don't know that I stole way more than that.
Where's my other torch?
What?
I'm not sure what you want, so I'm gonna leave.
I've had enough!
Oh fuck!
Come on!
No!
Please!
Fuck!
You should have just run away!
Are you okay here, or are you just gonna go to the back of the road?
Just put it on the ground!
Ouch!
Well you know we're gonna go rob him again.
I saw nothing, Steve.
But it was the shiny ass chrome wheels on that, bitch.
Wait, saw me come in.
No!
Hold on.
Runnin' around out the way. Maybe I don't pull my torch out.
First, we gotta get the poop pipe.
Wait, where is this dude?
He's coming up.
Saves?
Okay, I'm gonna pick this up.
Is there a way to like, uh, highlight interactables?
Wait, alt is dash backwards.
He's playing on some awfully tight suit.
Hee hee hee.
It's so dark in here.
Let's rob this side first.
Oh fuck.
Okay. Am I in Cumber? Is that what is happening right now? Fear.
Um, guys? He's literally right outside, isn't he?
There's a lockpicking? I think that chest was unlocked.
it's steppin' a literate guard.
Inaccessibility options you can highlight?
I mean, I kinda like that camp, to be honest.
I just like that we out, baby.
Y'all want some grilled meat?
What you eatin bro what the fuck are those postures do you?
What's the point of this spoon?
Well, I want this oh
We were starving
What are you thinking about here for I'm sorry, I'm sorry
So long as I ain't getting involved
What's this, huh?
Picking another fight?
What's this, huh?
Picking another fight?
Not gonna work.
Holy shit.
Hold up.
Ooh.
Got a bow.
Get out of there quick.
Now we're adventuring, dude.
I got two arrows.
Can't go in the cage.
Well, I'd dare say this place has been robbed clean.
Maybe we wouldn't get on the roof.
Man, I'm so fucking hungry, man.
It looks like I have two torches.
adventure begins. We have a gun with one bullet. Torch. Wild Berry. I'm gonna turn the music
down a wee bit. More.
I
You climb so good in his hands, dude now that's revolutionary
What's your job keep out and wanted guests from the exchange zone
And by that I mean the wankers from the new camp you're the fresh you they tossed in this morning, ain't you?
Cassayam and here's some friendly advice for you
Watch out for those bastards from the new camp part with the old camp
Like all of his ear at exchange zone the egg I already gave you to run down
No, no
He takes care of the freshies. He knows everyone and everything and if you ask nice
I'm sure he'll show you the ropes
What's so bad about this new camp?
What's so bad about this new camp?
It's chaos, that's war.
It's every man out for himself down there.
Compared to them, the old camps are bloody temple.
Since we control the exchange zone, the new campers also don't get any fresh goods from
the outside.
That's why they got a gang of bandits who just steal whatever they can get their ends
on.
This guy's painfully British.
idea where I can find a weapon? Maybe try to abandon my father down at Canyon.
There could be some weapons. Don't sell for the first pickaxe you can find though.
They're heavy and slow. Use them as a last resort.
We've always done it this way. I saw a woman come in with the goods before they threw me in.
What's going to happen to her? Let's put it this way.
the old parents get what they ask for so the king trades women for ore well they're all
conflicts just like us but yeah he does his shoots need the ore so anything goes they
ain't as bad as it looks though the girls have an all right life in the castle I hope
a couple of guys beat me up when I got out of the water one was wearing armor just like
yours. Yeah, fate of every freshie. They call it the cleansing. Are all of you old
campers this friendly? That's bastards. I'll give you that. But just pay your
protection money and you'll be fine. Any advice you can give me about the old
camp? Well don't piss off your parents. That's a good start. Same goes for his
warders. We are next in the chain of command. Oh, and the shadows may be lower than there,
but they have a lot of sway as well. So you want them to be your friends. At the end of
the day, just think hard about who you got this often here. You're a freshie, so folk
in the old camp will see you as a digger by default. If you want any respect round here,
gotta be a shadow at the very least make sure you get to the camp safely um I
don't want to join these guys I think they're kind of lame I will take the
Apple though bitch. Alright, is there fall damage on them?
A little bit.
A wee fucking bait. Eww.
Oh I got experience.
Skellington.
Skellington.
Wait, can we get this arrow?
Dub?
Three arrow?
I might turn on, uh, let's just see how it looks.
Object Outliner.
Let's see what it looks like.
it doesn't doesn't work on interactions or like the shit you farm
chest right there you blind asshole
Lockpick, beer, torch, arrow!
I'm looted up.
Dude, these fires are going out instantly.
How am I supposed to be the lamp lighter if my lamps suck?
I don't have the right key.
Dude, lockpick it. Move?
Check out the pages, the character get drunk.
I don't know.
We'll have to find out when I need to drink it, because it heals me, so...
Smore.
Of the rusty variety.
It doesn't seem obtrusive, but also I'm not really noticing a difference, so... whatever.
How do I lock on?
Yeah.
Damn.
Burn.
AHHHHHHH
I got killed by a rat.
I got killed by a rat!
Oh, you can't even wear the hat, dude.
Oh, I didn't even see this last time.
Okay.
Can we hold both?
No.
I can't even pick it up.
I don't think this does much more damage than the torch.
Do the mole rats there already.
What's up, bitch?
I
Okay
You want to go for the experience I got some meat
Let's cook it.
Eat it raw.
Good monster hunter, eat your heart out.
I need to know... here we go.
Oh, it does 10 damage. Jesus. Okay.
Hiya!
My torch how do I pick this up and not waste it now I put it away
Alright.
Me.
Whatever.
I got two more.
What's the big whoop?
What's the big whoop about?
Do you hear that?
The whistling of the wind in the canyon.
the sound of adventure. We're truly here now. There's a fucking raptor, dude. Why?
What's up, Saves?
Yeah, you got the chicken noise dude.
Come on in!
Ow!
Take that. Please don't kill me.
Ahhhh!
Got him, ass!
Glad we had time to drink some beer!
I have an idea.
what
how they works
come
That... that death sound sound like the June guy, dude.
It's not just a chicken, it's a raptor, guys.
I shot him in the head give me that arrow back okay it doesn't do that come
That's what they're...
Do we have so much meat, bro?
Holy...
It's gonna be a feast.
What the club looking like?
Five.
No, thanks.
Well, maybe it's better against Skellington.
Quest item.
hmm save done a loud fucking bird
why is it screaming at me hey old sword
Plus two damage dude!
What?
Can we do a wheelie?
How'd that work?
There's no map.
It's time to get mad about that.
Okay, I can't pick up the shield.
Wow. The barrier.
Wow.
Jump? Jump pussy.
You think I won't?
Man, we got the chapter.
I couldn't even jump. I think it's because I have my sword out.
You know we're going to get it.
Hey, God!
Mub and flashlight, thanks for 7.
Aim for the bushes? I don't think it's gonna help. I don't think it's gonna help.
There it is.
Okay, go away now.
Yeah, we're gonna have so many berries.
You guys ever had grilled scavenger meat with berries before?
That's my freaking special, baby.
Who are these chodes?
Oh
Here before my might I have two thumbs sharp blade
Did they got mustard
Wow.
Hey, Cave.
I'm going in.
What the heck?
Hmm.
Spooky.
Whoa!
What the?
Hmm...
Spooky.
Whoa!
13 Nuggets, dude.
Yeah, pick the torch up idiot
What I tell you guys about going in the water that
Okay, you put it away I can't see
What was that?
I saw something up there.
Grab it you fool.
You wanker.
So talk to these homeless guys.
You can climb the mountains?
Which mountain?
You're looking at my schmoos, holy mouth!
This one?
So, boys?
What?
I've never played the original.
What's so dangerous about your hunting grounds green through and through a not all the regions in the colony are the same
You gotta watch where you're going the main roads between the camps are mostly safe
But even they you might run into wolves and a wet lettuce like you will be easy pickings for them
And yeah, that's exactly what you are right now at least till you sort yourself out with some weapons and armor
Where can I find a map?
Ask around in the old camp. I think they got a map maker. Hey, maybe you can even nick one of his pieces while you edit. If you do, grab one for me will ya?
I'll bring as many as I can carry.
I don't know why I'm saying it all at once.
You're my sort of bastard. You should think about joining us in the new camp. If you ever end up there, ask for Laris. He's our leader.
Right if you impress him he might let you join our crew
Let's get rid of his name. What game do you hunt mostly scavengers got a lot of meat on them these buggers
And they're easy prey if you know how
Ask me make tracks here. He's better explaining that sort of thing
We're going better gear well the nearest spot is the old camp
Just gotta follow that road, that said, you'll get much better deals at Rcamp, the new one, if you know the right folks that is.
If you make it to the old camp, ask for more drag. He's one of ours, and he'll make you a good price.
Thanks. Thanks for the advice.
Sure you do, but don't go around thinking everyone's this friendly.
There ain't much to loot from a freshie like you, but there's some folk in here
He'd turn you into meatbank mush for a fucking pickaxe. I'll keep that in mind dude. They're Australian
fucking
No, mate, I'll let my lesson
Stop slurring at me, dude. You hunt here, right? I wonder what gave it away
What do you want? Do you have some hunting advice for me? Hmm? I guess yeah
Yeah. This is going to cost you. Life ain't free.
How much?
Well, how about a beer for starters? And after that we'll see.
I got that.
Alright, here's your beer. Now, tell me something about hunting.
All right, when you run into a group of scavengers, that's what we call those big birds.
Best lure a single one of those bastards out of the flock, and then take them down one
by one.
It's child's play, really.
The second you get close enough, they're gonna screech and poke a beak at you.
Wait a few breaths, then they'll come charging.
Of course, you gotta have your weapon ready by then.
If you're good and hit him before he hits you, keep at it until he goes down.
And you'll leave the fight without as much as a scratch.
If he hits you first, though, well, just don't let him.
You know what I mean?
Hmm.
I see.
I found your hunting knife.
How do you know it's his?
You...
Thanks, man.
I already thought it'd be lost forever.
Do not think you can learn from me for free now, but I am not a bastard either. Here take this as my thanks
This guy's got CTE the way he's talking
Give me a short bow. I already stole one, dude. Do you think I have what it takes to become a bandit?
No idea
Loyalty and the will to learn that's what it's about. Do you got it?
We'll see but I can get you to our camp if you want to. What do you think?
Why is he talking like that?
Uh, I don't want to go yet.
Just check the arms.
Have I played the original?
No.
I'm gonna add that to my title.
There we go.
People read those right?
We gotta go back up here.
I'm gonna play Gothic too?
No.
No, no, no.
Above the mine, that Cheddar sub.
Gee, I sure hope he wasn't gankin' my chain.
This is the only thing I saw that resembles a lion.
Silly Goose.
Um, guys?
I wonder if there's like an encumbrance limit.
These pickaxes got away a lot.
Right there. Very obviously right there.
Saves?
Did I am... I'm yoked up with motherfucking
wild berries bro? Just you wait.
Um, does the 360?
He's calling for assistance.
That's a ride.
I don't want to leave my... eh, whatever dude, there's probably a million torches right
I guess.
You know, that guy's advice wasn't bad.
He said to keep hitting him if I hit him first.
Although, it looks like he attacked back there.
Oh, hi Ron.
Just look out on the floor, boys.
Ah, man.
Dude, ancient dwarven ruins.
Fuck.
I do not know the requisite power word to open that shit.
What's that noise?
God, is that you?
Permit any passage.
Try clipping through it.
I don't think I can. I think I'm a loser.
Celebration prize month you should watch Kamina Botan begin.
Sounds like an animal.
I don't watch cartoons.
I'm just gonna watch cartoons.
I'm just joxin', dude.
Oh, there's the gob.
But he doesn't look evil, guys.
Never mind, he's evil.
Aw, man.
He's throwing rocks at me, so...
Dude, that is the scene?
That is the Hexen Death Sound, dude.
I-dude, I mentally nailed it down.
That is the Hexen Death Sound, dude.
Listen.
It's hard to find an individual.
I want a video that's Hexen All Sounds.
I don't know what you're saying.
Anyway, we're gonna shoot this guy.
The sound wasn't the original?
Yeah, a lot of games from way back when,
These sound libraries and shit, so.
Hey, fuck off.
Dodge.
They saw the same sound?
No, they wouldn't steal the sounds.
You could literally license them to use them, or they were free.
Like, so many games from like the 90s to like early 2000s, dude.
They all used like these resources to make their shit.
Actually, it's really cool.
Did I just shoot his weapon?
Ooh, what?
That sounds also a mix of all the way.
Does this sound when you punch someone to death?
Ah!
Got him, ass.
That shitty club.
You trying to mix me up with the rock that I'm using?
Or fella. Or fart-smella. Hey, thanks THQ Nordic for sponsoring this stream.
Sound effects? Hold on. He found it in the video.
It's like, I don't know if that's the exact one.
And you all want to smoke some dark shade?
I'm trying to get a lid.
Oh, god.
Did it even climb to the top of this mountain?
I don't think so.
My friend died from trying that the first time.
Ah yes, the instantaneous weed death smoke.
Happens to a percentage of us, randomly.
I wonder if I can live if I make it to the water.
That was awesome.
I'm making it to the water though, so.
It looks like maybe I can get up here.
Come on, big man.
SpongeBob.
Big guy.
Where you three are in Blackbird?
Alrighty.
Oh, no.
It's like below a certain altitude, you just start sliding off of stuff.
I was trying to catch myself on that rock.
Here we go.
I didn't jump.
Oh
You can't hit me if I'm underwater
Heh heh heh.
I don't think I can kill these guys.
They look like they shoot stuff.
What the fuck was that?
Oh, it's a lizard person.
That's cool.
Excuse me.
Robs you? Robs you? Robs you? Robs you?
Let's see you get up here, fool.
Oh. Oh no.
Dude, stop walking.
Oh, this system's a nuisance. That's cool.
Right here. Also, why are they teaming against me? I don't think that's very fair.
I like it! I saved.
We got a loot, boys. That's going to sell for a big shmoney on the black market.
Doble?
I don't know if it's doing less damage if I'm shooting right away, it seems like it.
Do an attack coward.
Help!
Use the terrain to your advantage hero or fresher.
I bet this guy one shots me so.
You couldn't do one more damage bro.
Whatever. We can save some arrows.
Sayonara, losers.
Headshot noise, maybe?
Wait reset. Hopefully his HP did not reset.
Wait, let me zoom in.
Hey.
I kind of want that xp boys I'm gonna be honest.
the stove. That was weird.
I like how it's just blizzard.
Blizzard.
Oh, look at that thing, it's a crab.
No fucking way.
Now look who's running.
I'm kiting, it's different, it's a strategy dude.
It's an honorable strategy that has been practiced for many millennia.
Do not run away.
Oh, you're gonna be so mad when I charge this arrow up and shoot you in the face again.
Where'd the loot?
Ain't got meat?
Wow, this truly is the Valley of Mines, TM.
Okay, that guy's advice was bullshit here.
I'm gonna go tell him.
Hey, fucking drox.
You little bitch.
I'm so only- I'm a level one crook, dude.
Enjoy drinking... not your own water.
Come.
Meet your death.
Looks like my health of mana went up.
Do I have stat points?
No, I have learning points.
Spend them with teachers to improve your attributes.
We got that cool bow that does like 25 damage.
Arrows.
I'm going to kill everything in their hunter grind stuff.
I don't fuck with these guys, wait, they're adults.
How much damage did you take?
Big damn.
Come if you dare, fool.
Guys, help!
I'm gonna say you're so fucking cool because you can do that and I can't.
I'll loot your kills though, bitch.
Dude, he's taking all of my stolen shit.
I better take this.
Okay, why did that happen?
Why did that happen?
Is it because I looted this kill?
He said down with your weapon.
But I was freaking defending myself.
Oh god.
Don't worry if that is everything you need to find out.
Is there like a block? Or is it just a dodge?
I don't think the dodge makes you involved.
Control is block, parry.
Wait, you can parry?
No way it works against the animals though, right?
Fuck it.
Got that, bitch.
Come on, Daden!
Aw, shit.
No way, dude!
I hit Control.
I don't know if it was too late.
Block only works for Swords.
Yeah.
fucking stop it
dude
no way
Come on, ding!
Oh, I gotta adjust the setting real quick.
I don't know what that's like.
It's like weird auto-am I can't turn it on.
Maybe I...
They're like speeds up now when I go over them, don't like that, don't like that, probably
Right here.
Torch?
Potion of quick healing.
Can't see.
These are trees, roots, and Skellington.
So fuck it, sorry, Skellington.
Uh, we got some healing.
We got some booze.
Strong beer.
Water reduces alcohol and swamp weed, so swamp weed is a real thing you can smoke.
Cool.
We love swamp weed.
Come forth, demons of hell.
I can't see you.
There, where's Galead?
After I get this hell cab, goodbye torch.
Oh, let's go to Kiev. It's too dangerous to hunt in the night.
But there be monsters afoot.
I don't give you guys chairs.
Hey, I'm-
Hey.
New here.
Good for you.
Is that the old camp over there?
No.
King Robo's cat house.
The old camps right under this bridge
How come I guess don't mean we doing here what's it look like?
The garden bridge without us
All them wild animals will be strolling right in the camp. Oh
You sleep right here. They're coming advice
Yeah
Stay out of the forest
Unless, of course, you're strong enough to take on the things that live there.
Go on and get your ass into the camp.
I'm sure they already got a pickaxe ready for ya.
Hee hee.
I'm gonna try something.
Rrrrrrreeeeeeeeewwww.
D L S S.
Quality.
Oh, that is, that is nicer.
Wow.
Wow.
I sure am. I'm gonna burn down the whole camp. Oh, we've got ourselves a funny one.
I hate the funny ones. Fuck you, dude.
Let's see you defeat
All right, fuck this we're gonna jank pay him on the bridge come forth demon
Yeah, I'm doing zero damage
Your training has served you well, I see
Come on man, fight back!
Dude fight back, come on man!
Come on man!
Come on man.
You're really getting so much experience, holy fuck.
I don't know what that noise is.
Dude, help!
The MOLARATS!
Fuck it, bitch.
He's shot!
Dead.
Oh, there it is.
Wait, what?
I'm up.
Okay, I think our beef has been settled.
I'll see you here.
I have to cook my meat.
I could have beat your ass by the way until these ball rats jumped in.
Wait, maybe he's in a drum.
Wait a moment.
What's the latest?
Nothing new.
Same shit there.
Where can I find Diego?
Junior Day is usually at the Castle entrance with Thoris.
Where can I find Thoris?
He usually stands at the Castle entrance.
He gives orders around here.
Thoris, he keeps things running here.
Go and put him in charge.
I'm here, I can see that.
What's the word then?
Calls any sort of trouble and you'll get a proper pasting.
What do you mean by trouble?
Most biggers pay us to keep him safe.
You mess with one of them, you'll get to know us proper.
We catch you poking around in someone else's hut.
Alright, alright, I get it.
Six first of it.
Alright, alright.
My torch!
Ahhhhh!
Ahhhhh!
Ahhhhh!
Go fuck yourself.
Ahhhhh!
Ahhhhh!
Ahhhhh!
Easy.
Easy.
Easy.
Easy.
Easy.
Easy.
This is before we got into our little scuffle.
Katsuh!
Where do you think you're going?
In there?
No shit.
You wanna air to start trouble, are ya?
Labar Gotham, sorry about that.
I just wanna take a look around.
Just wanna take a look around.
That's gonna cost you ten nugs.
Wait, that's the currency?
Diego told me to meet him in there.
Yeah, you got it, right?
Fine.
Go on in.
Mogs.
Hey, you fucking bitch.
Let's see you say no to Diego, pussy.
You can't.
Underling?
I don't think I'm allowed to be in here.
I
Brother what is this let's get this sword right now
What is that lockpicking minigame? I can't make sense of it.
I'm sorry.
Just put it on the ground!
I want it back!
That's enough!
I'm not droppin' that, jeez.
That shit belongs to me.
I saw you see it.
Does everyone here work for Gomez?
No, most here are just diggers.
All the asswaters and shadows work for him.
I see.
I don't care about you.
So, how are things?
What exactly do you want from me?
Just want to know what's going on around the camp.
Just ask the diggers then.
Ain't like they've got much else to do all day.
Dude, playing this game hard for on a hard man.
Gotta be hard starting off.
Sneaks in.
Hey, a chess.
You just say bitch.
Brother! Okay.
I think we gotta get to the end here.
Where do we have to get them?
The bottom right?
Oh god!
You capped even on a threat key.
Sorry.
Oh, what are you doing there?
I need my torch though.
Is that cool?
I need my torch though, is that cool?
It ends up like an actual lock.
Believe it or not, I've never picked a lock in real life before.
Criminal scum.
of
There's a prank.
There's a prank.
There's probably something so cool.
Probably something so cool in there, bros.
Me when I'm in the prison camp and rocks up here is behind me.
How do I move that one?
I'm breaking all of my lockpicks.
You can't be here!
How do we do this one?
Wait.
I've had enough of you, Keith.
Still going strong.
I don't know how to do that.
We can get four here, that's pretty good.
I thought I'm the right key you can't be here. We're gonna move them
Robin and steal it
Are you trolling or do I will literally stop this dream and give you one minute to give me this solution
It's a lot of puzzles if you can't put them in a bag. What are you trolling?
Are you trolling?
Wait, I get it.
FUCK!
What were you doing there?
Robin?
Stealing?
Please leave.
Did you really think you could leave everything they're saying?
Oh, sir, just make camp now.
Got it.
What are you sneaking around here for?
You can't be here.
Do something about it, bitch.
You can't be here.
Do something about it, bitch.
Come on, man, fuck off!
What are you doing in there?
Nothing.
Damn lost, man!
No.
Why
Have you played the original of this game?
Keep the title, my man.
This is all cash for you.
You can't read.
Yeah, I know.
Like, why can't I move this one?
Why can't I move it?
Can I only do a certain number of moves?
You can't be here.
I
Why wouldn't I be able to move this one like-
The first one moves last one, last one is at the end.
Okay, but I'm hitting D here, okay.
Which is move left.
Come on, man, fuck off!
Right.
Right.
But if I go up to the top one and hit D, it works.
But if I hit D on the bottom one, the thing is stuck up top.
Line the pins in the center.
This moves four of them, right?
What the hell are they?
You can't be here.
Shut up.
Like, why can't I move that one?
I don't understand!
What is it?
So I hit D here.
Okay. It's jammed.
I hit D here.
Why? Why is it like that?
I hit A here.
One in five are connected I know
They move each other in different directions
My torch
I couldn't I couldn't move that left or right come on man fuck off shut up dude shut the
fuck up the pen has to be in the middle on it
The pieces of moves are already at the max, and they can't go any further.
Just because one moves five doesn't mean five moves one in the same way.
Word?
You can't be here.
I think I'm just fucking it up so bad.
I was thinking of getting caught up on like this move everything things I could move that one at all
Why do they make it so hard?
It's not hard.
It's like a slide puzzle, right?
That's pretty much it.
I'm not good at puzzles.
I think?
At least this guy's courteous enough to wait for us.
It's very nice of him.
This loot is going to be so fucking awesome, man, holy, holy moly, it's gonna be so good.
I don't think I moved them.
I have to get this one up here.
Why?
Come on man, fuck off!
Why?
Why though?
Okay, here we go.
There we go.
You can't be here.
If I can get the 1 synced up with 2 and 3, I think we're good.
So you can make two mistakes before it breaks a leg.
This swaps this one.
And that swaps that one, right?
second and third place to move the first and fourth?
Yeah, that's what I'm trying to get them in order so that I can move them all along.
So, the bottom three have to go down one and the top two have to go up one.
Come on man, fuck off!
Come on man, fuck off!
Come on man, fuck off!
Come on, man, fuck off!
Come on, man, fuck off!
With the lockpicking system the same in the original, exclamation point total.
Maybe we got to come on the bottom here.
Yeah, okay.
I'm sold out.
You can't be here.
Why can't I move though?
Literally what?
Hold on, mister, I'm almost dead.
I'd punch you if you wouldn't kill me instantly.
Do you want to help me with this?
Is taking too long?
Yeah, go ahead and burst it up.
I'll be back.
Yeah, do you go ahead and post it up? I'll be back.
Hello, buddy.
The ones out of sync with two and three are in sync.
Okay, they're in sync now.
You can't be here.
I hope you notice these are these some of these are impossible unless you level of lock picking
really is it not possible this one is not it is all right here's what we'll do
We got Kyle Lanell and Chad.
You have one minute.
Solve the puzzle. Starting now.
What time is it? 6.19.
Alright.
I actually spent one hour trying to solve one only to find out it was literally impossible.
Are they even look up guides?
No, no, no, no, no, no. Okay, we'll start the time over because your retort was scooping
as fuck. Okay. I give up. I give up. Please solve it for me. Okay. For everyone in chat.
Be the hero that they need.
This is for them.
The 34436.
34436.
3, 4, 4, 3, 6.
way that wasn't that chatter by the way the one other way three or four they
It can only go one direction!
Three!
The opposite direction of what I just did before you said that.
Six!
It can only go one direction.
Okay.
Now what?
Genius!
There's only five.
He's right.
He is right.
So do any of you actually have the solution or are you literally just making fun of me
right now?
I truly want to see at least one person in Chatsong.
Just one.
Just one.
Do we have any volunteers?
Maybe this will help.
the fucking Github lockpick practiser, dude.
Okay.
Don't link that ship.
I want you to link a...
a...
Dude, it's literally...
You can literally do numbers in chat to solve it.
Two-one-three-two-one-four-five.
Two...
One.
It's a solver.
Okay, let's see what the solution is.
Here's a video guide for you.
If I click that, it doesn't have to do with THQ Nordic.
Thank you for sponsoring, by the way.
THQ Nordic's Masterpiece Gothic 1 remake.
I'm about to time your ass out for a week, motherfucker, so let's click it, dude!
I'm actually gonna time it. I don't know, man. Look.
So, moving forward, okay, can we please acknowledge one thing? All right.
All of you guys are stupid as fuck.
Look at that.
Actual solution. Let's see.
This is an AI video!
What is this?
This is not the same chest.
It's not the same chest!
You can't even Google the answer correctly, you stupid fuck!
You can!
You failed to Google the solution!
Come on, Adam, come off!
You failed!
You literally Googled incorrectly, dude!
And the result you linked in Twitch chat is an AI-generated YouTube video, dude!
Thank you THQ Nordic for the wonderful sponsor.
I'm going to keep going, one, two.
It's out on PC, PlayStation 5 and Xbox Series X and or XS whatever the fuck they're calling
the Xbox these days, bro.
Very good
Dude when they come out with the new Xbox that should better be called Xbox to or Xbox 720 you do
What is this Xbox series Xboxia?
Cool
Um, well I gotta turn off the uh
Timer, can I guard unpin that message as well?
Yes, me lord.
Yes, me lord!
Chess solver allegedly.
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
Dude, I'm just gonna level my lockpicking skill up, dawg.
They've used a pen paper you could do it.
I don't want to discuss doing this puzzle with literally any of you because none of
you are able to present a solution.
Okay.
And it is a you can literally type it out in numbers.
I gave you multiple opportunities.
None of you could do none of you could do.
Okay.
Literally none of you bro.
So I don't know, there's no point in discussing a solution with you.
You did it.
That's fucking awesome, dude.
Enjoy.
Enjoy your profound success, dude.
I'm going to go pee real quick, hang on.
I'm ready to go tonight, the other party of life, with a fake love, I'm ready to go tonight,
We had better have money or life
A way of needing rain before joyful, yeah
She can come to me like she's gonna
Like I stole the group of them, me
Oh yeah, I feel it like
I feel it just as fine
Gotta start with dancing tonight
Jumping up together with your body
And don't stop music from now on
Keep it up, it's all by the night
I'm not sure if this is the right way to do it, but I'm not sure if this is the right way to do it.
What?
What?
It's not something you need to do, you son of a...
What are you talking about?
I'm not saying that you're broke.
I need to explain to you.
Right, now that's it.
What? What?
What are you talking about?
What is it?
What are you talking about?
What are you talking about?
Well, I'll be right back.
Don't tell him.
We're going to go.
We want to go down the building.
Down the building.
Hello?
You want to sell this stuff?
Dude, I need that.
I'm not supposed to talk to you about this.
There's no stuff like this.
Two thousand percent.
Hey, hey.
What?
Can I see her?
Can I see her?
Can I see her?
Yeah.
Hey, hey.
Wait, just a minute.
We have to get back.
No, no, no, no, we're here.
Oh
Oh, guys.
I'm sorry to be back there.
Okay, at least.
We got it.
Nope.
Oh, ew.
We have some time.
I'm gonna go over there.
I'm gonna go over there.
I'm gonna go over there.
I'm gonna go over there.
I'm gonna go over there.
I'm gonna go over there.
Hello.
What you guys looking at?
Wait, let's cook our meat, bros.
Ah, that was good.
Oh, yeah.
What was in the chest?
Oh, you know, like...
Like a sword instead.
Are you a quitter?
Bro.
I'm just gonna level my lock, but you're still in there.
How's it going, mate?
Just trying to get to know people.
Oh, I get you.
This place has made you to trust your own mother.
But yeah, I'm doing alright.
Finally got out of those bloody mines.
How do you get by then?
I'm helping folks solve their problems.
If you ever find yourself in trouble with the wrong people,
I can help you set things straight.
The link I sent has a solver.
Dude, I didn't want you to use a tool to solve it for you.
I wanted to use your giant fucking chat brain to solve it for me, yourself.
I don't want to use a website to lockpick the chest, but either I can do it or I cannot.
I should level up my skill, so it's easier if I cannot solve it raw like that.
It was a 25 step puzzle.
I'm sure that I could have gotten that eventually.
Can you point me to the key players here in the camp, the shadows?
Oh, looking to score a few points there, eh?
Well, the A goes for top-top, but you know that already.
His most trusted men are Fingers, Whistler and Sly.
And then there's Dexter and Fisk, our fences.
They sell their stuff down at the marketplace.
Everyone buys from them, even the waters, so that gives them a bit of spay.
Last but not least, we got Skatty.
Run with the Elina and decide so you can fight and all that.
Not to Foco anymore.
He's someone you'll want to stay on the right side of.
This guy clears my bag.
Why do you feel so loud?
Because it is.
BAM BAM BAM BAM
Yippie! Where's the marketplace? I've got some ore I want to spend.
Whatcha eatin' there, bud? Grass?
What's so horseshoes is this?
Ecliptic, thanks for subbing.
And Bethesda and Mass Sandwiches over here.
Are we gambling?
Still wouldn't want the ice.
You've got a name.
He's a weed smoker, dude.
You have no idea until now the sleeper only spoke to us through his nebulous
Is going to change
Sleeper will finally speak to us in his true voice and tell us how to liberate him. However
We will need as many brothers as we can for the ritual to succeed only with our minds joined
We will be able to break through to him
You stranger could be a part of this like me
you could become a servant of a being more magnificent than anything you could
possibly imagine what do you say our camp is not far from here down in the
swamp I can take you there if you wish
what do I do what do I get out of joining you besides the honor of serving
the sleeper you might just become one of the chosen few he blesses with the
gift of magic well I want to learn you might rise into the highest ranks and
become a Templar only the best of our fighters are granted this position there
are even Templars who have mastered both the skill of combat and magic either way
for a true believer our brotherhood is a wellspring of possibilities but please go
ahead and see for yourself. Is it our camp and witness the strength of our community?
I don't want to get involved with that.
Can I learn magic from other people, or is it only the weed heads, dude?
You aware of them all for me?
Alright, I'm not convinced, I'm not convinced.
Hey, it's the guy who's in charge.
Well, I just want to put it in your face.
Inos, be with you.
I was there for you, so I need to drink.
I'm just looking around.
An inquisitive soul.
How commendable.
I'm Torres.
And as you can see, a servant of Inos.
I also offer magical items to select customers.
If you'd like to trade, you're welcome to make an offer.
I have a letter for the Firemages.
Caristo takes care of that.
He'll be in the mages building in the inner circle.
Will they let me in?
Well, usually not.
The castle grounds are accessible to us mages, the ore barons, and the waters.
But, those might make an exception.
You could tell them to let me through.
If only it were that simple.
I'm but a humble servant of Innos.
I hold no power over such decisions.
Tell me, do you live by the laws of the gods?
That sounds very different.
Uh, I could be more educated.
I'm ignorant.
to wake this spark of magic within you.
You want to make me a mage?
There's no need for haste.
And it isn't quite that easy.
But if you offer sufficient devotion and wisdom,
I can offer magic.
And what's the catch?
No such thing.
It's my duty to act on behalf of and for the good
of the order.
He knows Will's it.
And she's why I'm talking to the convicts in the first place.
I don't know if it might appear unrewarding.
How do they say, if you are to-
She was getting fucked in the background, your mother?
Many are ungifted.
But this is about you.
You-
She's the pig on the shank right there.
Simply swinging pickaxe or even a sword.
And I'm offering you a chance to prove it.
Think about it.
Offer me!
Offer me the magic.
Please, you know, don't let this one fail as well.
Okay, what do you need? It's quite simple find a blank piece of scroll paper and two wolf claws
Interesting combination
Bring them to me, and I will craft them into a scroll that will be up
Tell me about those tell me more about scrolls
Producing and inscribing scrolls is no less part of wielding magic and the magic itself. In fact, it is quite a useful talent
Perhaps you will learn it yourself, but let's not get ahead of ourselves
ourselves. I'll take care of it. I'll take care of it. Good. A blank piece of paper and
two wolf claws. And I will show you how to work magic through it. But I gotta pay him.
Why did I just do that? Yes. Let me try some too. Somebody's got some in his house, Steve.
fucking way
Don't worry, I couldn't solve it anyway
Don't worry dude
Well, let's go kill a wolf, I guess
Climb it, you fuck.
Looking for something?
No.
Dude, they're all locked.
We need a key for that.
We gotta find someone to teach us lockery.
Hey, what's up? Sorry.
What's up?
Hey, Dusty.
Hold on.
Hey, Emile here. How's it going?
Oh, don't ask.
I've been working me ass off in the mines the last two weeks.
I have full of lousy nuggets.
That bald bloke down there, that Parvez character.
He's from the swamp camp. Maybe...
Why don't you leave, dude?
If you don't make it here, why don't you leave?
Because I'm not sure what it's like over there.
I had a mate here.
It's like over there. I had a mate here, Melvin, and he took off last week
I ain't heard from him since what was that noise until I do I'll stay here
The dude was standing right there, why he moved back
Wait, okay, they're clapping again
Okay.
Hold up.
This guy has nothing bro.
Hold.
Hold
Fold.
Fold.
Fold.
Fold.
I don't have the right key.
You sure don't, buddy.
porch
the hell's that noise
All right man, all right, all right, all right, actually let's try one more, let's try one more, let's try one more.
It broke.
Did the sound coming out of the door?
That's weird.
Ay-ya-ya!
Hey, hey, hey.
Sounds like Alchemy in there, dude.
Dude.
Which one's gonna I move?
start with the last one
Oh my god.
It's like, dude.
Okay.
I'm about to hit A. Okay.
The tutorial says move left slash right.
Okay.
A is moving the nub to the right.
Why?
It moves the slab left?
You're right.
I was looking at the nub.
Dude, I just...
I don't have the lockpicks all the time for the patients to do this without, like, a tutorial,
a proper tutorial. I'm not complaining, not complaining, but there's just no point in
trying to brute force it, dude.
Start with the ones that don't move.
And don't let the pins push into the sides.
Okay.
I'm gonna try and move this middle one to the left. Okay?
Now I'm gonna try and move it to the right.
It wouldn't go left because it's going to the front plate. Yeah, how did you know that?
To begin with oh wait
How did you know this is the lock-picking lawyer
Now you know but you call you guys call me stupid as I'm trying to figure it out you're literally calling me stupid the whole time
You made that same mistake 8 times though?
TVH, I don't quite get it either, so you're a good man.
So like, these aren't random moves.
Dude, solve it, chatter.
You.
Ankh-ture-t-tens-ver. Okay, so I'm gonna give you a formula to solve it, okay?
Front to back.
1, 2, 3, 4, 5. Okay.
Use the greater than less than signs to tell me the number of moves I need to use. Okay?
Solve it.
Somewhere where a Python program to solve it. I know, and I don't want to use that, dude.
This is for that very first chest.
You see-
One, two, three, four, five, six is my new front leg.
Nice push there.
Do you see that, dude? It's literally 25 moves to solve that first chest.
It's just not worth it, dude. It's not worth it to sit here and try and brute force those, dude.
We gotta get some skills.
Do the first test you'll figure out how it works.
I know how it works, okay?
I know how it works.
Alright.
That does not make it any less difficult, okay?
The nubs have to all be in the middle for it to be unlocked, okay?
Each one is different.
Each plate is moved by other plates, or not at all.
That's all stuff that I currently, at level one, have to figure out by way of breaking
My lockpicks. Okay.
I understand.
There, I'll put you in time out. You still fit right there, big man.
Why? I know I'm coming in here with that permission. Now shut off.
I may have something.
What do you say?
I want to go in there.
And I want to get out of this fucking colony.
Oh, Sartata's spitting holes. I tell an idiot like you to shove it.
You could just let me through.
That's up to Thoris to decide.
Oh, what part of the shit?
I mean, I... yeah.
Abarth's highly-cruv-ing 20 subs, perjure that.
We're gonna find Thoris.
I wonder if there's a way to like, skip time. I mean, obviously if I have my own bed I could do it, but...
You got any food I can borrow?
Select the apple, you motherfucker.
What are you sneaking around I do I do
We got there
It's fingers talk to me bro talk to me bro get lost man he sounds very not British
These don't want to speak to me, boys.
The arena.
This guy's sitting here alone.
So fucking sad.
Nobody ever asked me where they have coins.
Why did you do that?
Don't sit down.
What's that noise?
That noise sounds like I'm in combat.
I'm sorry.
I definitely stole that right in front of him, it didn't give a fuck, so that's cool.
Wait.
I got a poker.
Sometimes you gotta know when to hold him.
Know when to hold him.
Know when to walk away.
No way in the run.
This place is pretty big.
It seems like everywhere I go I'm trespassing, except for in here.
Yeah, I bet.
That I can use.
I don't know if you should do that.
I want to sleep till right before sunrise.
What the fuck?
I'm sorry.
Such a loser, dude.
Swarovski man, I don't think so.
Get the fuck out of here, mate!
You're lucky I'm too inept to pick your lock.
at least full healed in the bed.
Is Amphora like booze?
No.
I got 23 nuggies.
It's junk.
What is Amphora?
That kind of jar?
I'm stealing these guys' jars, dude.
I wanna make so much money when I sell those ship rows.
Yep, that's what I wanted to do.
Ha ha ha ha.
Yup.
Ooh.
I want to be a wizard.
This guy in town seems pretty chill.
I want to be a stupid hippie wizard.
Umm...
I mean, it's the same but not old.
There's Amzal, thanks for selling it.
We're gonna find Thorax.
That's not his name, I made it up.
This looks kind of like a marketplace.
I don't think anything's open right now because it's nighttime.
Gold?
Can I just wait on the open?
Oh, you know what fucking thing so Mike well up
You can attack while swimming I did not know that way you can fly spoilers
Dude all the boys that were chilling at the campfire left you
The party's over, dude.
They went to clap each other sexual style?
These guys suck.
They're a different guy.
Hey, I'm new here. Who are you? Me. I am Tehran. I'm with the brotherhood of the sleeper.
I have to get into the castle. Can you help me with that somehow?
See, we're only seven.
If you're not, brother, the only ones that the warders allow into the camp are those who provide Gomez with herbs.
I got those.
That is how we sustain ourselves. We harvest swamp wheat and sell some of it to the other...
Now, this is a different swamp we get.
None of your fucking business hippie.
I don't trust those guys.
I'm new here, Smile.
I'm new here.
Heh.
I could see that.
What's the word then?
Cause any sort of trouble and you'll get a proper...
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Got it.
I wanna go in there.
I don't want to get out of this, I thought I spent an old act.
You could just let me through.
I stopped to f-
Where can I find Thoris?
He usually stands at the castle entrance.
He's right behind you then!
What can you do with more capable?
Freshy, aye?
If you're off to a cab to take you in,
you're gonna have the same dialogue that other guy had.
God, stop talking to those big s-
Are you sick?
One more step and you'll mince me.
Sorry man.
It seemed like you were asleep.
This guy's gonna castle? It's pretty sweet deal, bro.
Hidden rocks, living in the cast.
I think that's where I came from.
He's not standing there at this time of day.
I don't freaking matter because I can't get in there anyway.
You think they'd take a level 1 goon in Doreenah?
I'm the level 2 goon.
Wait.
Any spare weapons, me lord?
I'm seeing lots of broken arrows, bro.
They only accept people who know how to lockpick.
I don't believe you.
Wait.
Disregard.
Disregard.
It sounds like it's raining, but there's actually not any rain coming down, by the way.
Okay, alright.
Um, guys?
Guys?
Yeah.
Free XP.
My controller's library.
I guess they eat the meat bugs.
Let's go kill stuff until daytime, I guess.
Maybe we can find some wolves.
I mean, I somehow doubt I could kill a wolf, actually.
If it's anything like Dragon's Dogma.
Find the Parchment Elemental.
Oh, Parchment Elemental.
Oh, they got planes? Jesus Christ.
Oh, held off.
I'll be taking those back, fellas.
God bless!
Bro, what is that noise?
I got a B-150 flying overhead, dude.
I can't be sure that this torch is actually helping me.
Oh.
Greetings, Paco.
Hey.
Hey, wake up.
I'm uncontrollably walking at you right now.
Hey, you. Me?
No, your grandma.
Of course I'm talking to you.
I wouldn't go down there if I were you.
Why?
Man...
can you get any more green blood than that that's orc territory down here they'll
fucking tear you to shreds oh my pleasure
guards the way to the orc territory yeah but can I kill him though
No, no, no, no, maybe.
I think I buried that.
Hold on.
I've not fought anyone with a weapon since learning that I can bury it.
I think I'm doing it too late or early.
Do you avoid damage completely if you do it, does anyone know?
What is the timing jesus
Hi
I can't oh
He's just so much stronger than this dude.
What if...
Oh, it had it!
Let's go see some more works, dude.
I'm sure they're chill.
Oh my...
The thing killed me in one hit.
Come on in.
Come on in.
Do an attack, coward.
I'm kind of a jobber, dude.
I think maybe we exited the town through the uh...
You should come here later, Gaith.
That lizard had more HP than the last one we fought.
Please God.
Thank you, Lord.
Thank you.
Thank you.
Thank you.
Thank you!
Oh hell no.
Come on, me.
Epic dodge moment. Nice health.
Wake up. Wake up, please.
oh my let's see you get up to your stairs you son of a bitch
NOOOOO DUDE
how come I couldn't go in there dude I hope I get like a cool house bro
I gotta go loot that chest.
Let me alone.
Where do I get in there?
fucking saves bro I can see inside
where there's a door
and then we go in through the roof
But how?
Also, I'm pretty sure there's Velociraptors over there.
Hold?
I'm such a fucking loser, dude.
Clearly we need him to go flight first.
Oh shit.
I just, I need a way to progress time and I can't do it.
Because I do not have a bed.
Get off of it, dude.
You've just been trolled.
Turn right and go down here.
There's a bed in the broken tower you can use.
About that.
About that.
I did use this one, and then they fucking kicked me out.
Looks like they're about to write the fuck down here.
I'm fine! Jesus!
Is this your torch?
My torch now, bitch.
Such a poor fucking loser, dude.
It seems like there's people away.
So we can see the rain now.
Do they left a guy in the ghiblet, dude? Wait, hold on.
I don't know if you should be picking that stuff up.
Is this like the poop sewer?
Where all the waste from the place goes?
Oh, man.
He dead at hell, bruh.
No, that would be your mother.
Ha ha ha!
Uhhhh...
Is there a way to see the time without using a bed?
Hold it.
What's up, dog?
Look, most folk in here are dirt poor, and the mages are known to pay good nuggets to their helpers.
So do yourself a favor and keep your mouth shut about this until you meet an actual mage.
Unlikely as it is for someone in your position.
Why not?
The mages live in the old camp castle, and only Gomez's guys are allowed in there.
But, if you're lucky, you might run into Taurus in the Outer Range.
He's the only one that ever leaves the castle.
Yeah, I already ran into that guy, and he's cool.
I want to learn magic for him.
Wait, that looks like parchment.
But I can't fucking interact with it, bruh.
Sauteed Meat Bug.
I think the meat bugs are cockroach-adjacent.
Oh, what the hell?
How come I can't use this?
Okay.
of
now a platforming
we play the original this
Ah, no.
That's gonna, that's gonna fetch a hefty Nug, fellas.
Hmm, meat bug ragout.
The sound's coming out each time I pick something up.
Wait?
Where was that?
I saw an ant.
Maybe I'm hallucinating. Whoa!
I already robbed this place except for the chest which I am physically incapable of uh, picking.
I'm a loser.
Oh, they left me ham.
Old recipe.
Maybe the camp's cook can help with that.
I don't know who that fuck it is.
Well, another hard day at work.
Guy with the chef hat.
I got the judges hat, does that mean you're a judge?
Well, we slept to completion, dude.
Where's my torch?
Are you the cook?
Nah, you're digger.
We gotta find a guy whose name is like...
You have supreme...
The Iron Chef.
probably a meat bug recipe dude. Excuse me sir. Are you the chef? Oh he's wearing a
Take a look.
Recipe? Let me see.
Well, put a spear up my arse and call me a blood fly.
That's Old Brock's water stew.
Who's Old Brock?
He used to cook for the waters and didn't have to pay protection money in return.
Some of the ingredients on the recipe are smudged. Do you know what they are?
Not really. But this should be enough for me to guess the rest.
I had no idea how bastard you saw an assay for seasoning
That explains the taste. How's this?
You get me the stuff for the stew and I'll show you how to make it
But I want a ladle myself been dying to try it, but he only ever gave it to the warders
Why do you say that thing about the squice though sounds good that implies that's what I wanted to hear
So you'll need scavenger meat fill it if you can manage it one onion
A carrot and a potato and obviously
Solanesi
It's a rare herb that grows in around the caves around here meat onions carrot potatoes and
Salmanaceae
Goddard, I reckon Brock use wine, but I think water will do the trick just fine
Get double of everything. I'll need my own bits if I'm showing you how I make it
Okay
I ain't seen you here before. Say, you mind if I join you for a bit? I'm sure you could use a friend
He's gonna rob me guys. Why not come along great we can chat on the way
He looks like he's gonna rob me
Say, where are we going?
Or is that surprise?
I LOVE SURPRISES!
Wait, maybe he's my new companion.
Let's take him outside the gates and then...
Let nature take its course.
Why are they?
Hey, you just do your thing and don't mind me.
I'll just stay here and keep your company.
Something's gotta be wrong with him. He keeps following me everywhere.
Please, could you shut up for just one moment?
Sure.
Don't run you fucking coward hey
Where are you going?
I was clearly trying to murder someone.
Excuse me.
Why man, you hit me. What's that for?
Yeah, I'm about to hit you again. I like hitting things.
What? What by Belior is wrong with you? I don't want nothing to do with you anymore. You... you... you freak!
Alright, let's chat. What about? Or... you know what? Maybe later.
I can't feel bad... Hold on.
Why would you do that? I wanted to see it...
What does that mean?
Talk?
I knew that's what Chinwag means, but I can't tell if he's just saying random shit or if
he wants me to take him somewhere.
Or sly.
So, Sam, where are we going?
Maybe there's a nice and quiet place where we could go to talk?
We'll stick him to our hut, dude.
That's awesome.
Wherever that is, it's up here.
I guess the name is Guy.
Dude, let's have a chin wag.
Hey, could it be that you're just running in circles?
I mean, I don't know where you're going, but, well...
Let's talk to this guy.
Wait.
Dude, look at this.
What am I talking about?
The poor Walter who had to step in for his mate neck and his outing down his turf for him. Where is Nick?
He must really have something for us as we cover him for until he's back
Let's keep you from collecting his levies cross. He did a big round just before he disappeared
I must left to get from those diggers right now
You know, it's all right love lollygagging the sins of the valley cheers for letting me take a look
maybe we could do it more often but what am I saying we still got loads of time
for the two of us today
Rob's here
me and my best friend but that's the stuff hanging out and walking around the
Castle moat, which is also actually where the poor people live
I'm for his fuck I ain't got no money
Something
Hey, I'm new here.
Oh, you smoke a weed?
I'm Graham, the map maker.
Oh.
What are you after?
I'm looking for a blank piece of paper.
I'm looking for a blank piece of paper.
It's actually part of my opinion.
Could you?
Sure.
I'll be checked, though.
Paper scarce in here and everything I'm selling is a map I can't make.
Uh-huh.
Dude, he got a naked lady sketch.
Ooh, I always...
I'll take one parchment, please.
And I will sell you...
...hat.
Hey.
I'm gonna keep the spoon, because it's worthless to this guy.
We can sell a short bed.
I wonder if... yeah, he's got seven.
Good.
Perhaps you would enjoy a loot, good side.
So something for two.
How about this rusty sword?
Nice.
You seem to know your way around out there, don't you?
Not really.
There are a few good men out there who helped me.
Coastal did a lot of work on the maps that guy really gets around with his scavengers
He's nearly outtow close to Cavillons hut might be worth your while. What's he smoking? That's swamp leap did swamp lead
He's getting suited
What's up?
New era. I ain't seen your copper full. I'm sly.
What's the job? What's the job?
One of my mates went missing. A warder, neck. Wordy is he ran off to the new camp.
I ain't buying it. You're a freshie. Freshies get around a lot.
Why don't you keep your eyes peeled for him?
If you find him, I'll put in a good word for you.
okay all right let's see what I can do good maybe fletcher can give you some
hints him and knack of mates and he's taken over next corner of the camp
since the bloke went missing which corner is that the arena district you'll
find it why do you have a torch during the day in case I feel like throwing it
wait where'd mud go hi I think the two of us are gonna have a lot of fun
together right so where do you sleep you can always sleep at my place if you
like
no one nice fucking job dude holy shit
Well, these guys just rebelled, dude.
It seems like they vastly outnumber the guards.
Seize the means of production.
So...
When was the last time you saw Nick?
What's it to you?
Slime has to find him.
Do it again.
I'm trying to make a good impression, are we?
I ain't seen him for a week though, so there ain't much I can tell ya.
Try that guy, the digger. He knows everyone.
About Nick.
Huh?
He's still looking.
What the fuck did we see?
I've never asked why they tossed you in here.
Maybe like animals too much.
Same as me.
They hate that when someone really loves animals. That's why they chucked me in.
What did he mean by that?
Must be some truth of that story.
What did he mean by that?
I can't remember where we saw a guy.
I'm gonna look through here for real quick.
I'm gonna look through here.
What the?
No.
We think we are being bastard from the new camp real roughie is
Next time they come I'm just gonna tell them to deal with you if they ever hit me again. That'll show them
No
It's my bottle and I'll be drinking it
Hello, Borp Pussy?
Borp-a-o-s-y, sorry.
What's up, bro?
Where'd this mofucka at?
Glad it's not me.
Ha! They didn't mean new campers are in for a big surprise.
I ain't got a clue. I've got someone looking out for me now.
They'll wet themselves. Ha! That'll be proper funny.
They're so used to making short work of everyone.
But with you, they're gonna think twice.
what you said says guy knows more you know the chatter said maybe it says more
in the quest log this ain't that kind of game I saw I we ran past guy when I was
I'm trying to kill, uh...
What?
But where?
It's just not worth listening to.
You know what?
I'll do you a favor, I'm putting a good word for ya.
Maybe they'll accept you into the camp then?
Then we could see each other every day!
Pretty dumb idea.
This poor guy.
He's a bit dim, ain't he?
Hell.
I'll be your friend, bro.
Hey, how's it going?
Fuck off.
What?
I don't like your mug.
That's all.
You know why I'm here?
Because I killed twelve men in a single night.
Just like that.
Scary.
How about you try me?
You want me to fuck you up?
thing. Great. Let's see you try that again. Let's see you try that again.
Dude, this block...
Wait, it does kinda work.
Is it gonna take all of my shit?
Motherfucker, dude.
I don't think we...
You taking my crown jewels?
Shut up.
Okay, we literally are at the same point we were.
I'm gonna go beat that guy's ass after I mount this ladder for some reason.
Meow, meow, meow.
Someone said are you good at anything in this game?
I'm a level 2 crook, but see what that guy doesn't realize is that I have something he
doesn't and that's the ability to time trap.
a bow dude aren't you using arrows on that guy shut up
I'ma get you
Greetings.
Away with that weapon.
Ha!
Like me.
Dude shut the fuck up.
Hey, the fuck off.
What?
I don't like the world.
What's scary?
You want me to...
Come on, dude.
What are you waiting for?
Come on, dude.
Ow.
Yeah, it's like...
I'm not positive when I should attack.
Maybe I'm just a loser.
What the fuck?
Oh
Rob's you why is the guy in fire?
What run away
Hey, wait, how's it going I'm alright is it that obvious kind of here's some advice as a welcome gift
Never piss off the warders if they ask you for protection money or donations as Jack will cause it
They're not really asking
You best pay up. They'll make your life hell from here on out
That's chill
I
You that's not all I can just fight him again. No, I can't remember what I got
Can't sack this.
Oh yeah.
How you guys seeing Guy?
I swear I ran by him unlike the outskirts.
me. Excuse me. Okay, man. Who's on the way to my shithead? Use the Python script to
walk the guy. That's a good idea. Gates still close.
Excuse me mister.
Hi.
Hi.
New here.
Wait a freshy?
No way.
You've got to tell me the latest from the outside.
one came in. Oh, name's cargo by the way. I fight in the arena. But you probably guessed that.
I did not. I did not guess that.
You good? As a fighter? Well, I haven't been doing it for long, but I already won a couple of fights.
Cool talk.
What?
That's not funny.
What?
As long as there's something to do with it.
Where is this guy?
Could he be in one of these little shitty houses?
During the day?
we kill mud will he stay dead no he runs like he runs like a pussy dude
my feet are all sore from all this running around how about we find ourselves a
nice cozy spot to rest our legs a bit
just what I thought I'll talk guy hello there hello there hmm I haven't seen you
before well I'm super back on it she's got in but I'm welcome to the colony I'm
guy already figured out which can't be gonna join not yet what would you
recommend. Oh depends I guess. They all got their pros and cons. You can stay here until
you've made up your mind though. One of the huts just cleared out. I think I'm already
in there. Which of the huts is free? The one right by the arena. It's got a red awning
out front. Hard to miss. Alright. Alright. I'm looking for neck. The water. Any idea
where he went? That's the second time someone's asked me that. No I don't. Maybe he had a
smoke too many and joined the looms. Or maybe he ran over to the new camp or had some bad
luck hunting scabs. Maybe Snaf could tell you more though. He's the last one I saw neck
talking to. Oh my god. Just a lot of talk.
Excuse me. Sorry. I found them.
Where's nothings for something? I got the ingredients.
I got the ingredients for procs too.
Go on, where? Don't play games with me, lad.
To share.
How's it going?
Not bad. You're newly an anchor.
Just got in yeah, got that look about yeah
Yeah, that's some rice too. Oh, thanks. I've got something that needs doing if you're interested
Nice handover meeting
What can I do for you? I've got a new recipe
meat bug ragu a la snaf with rice and mushrooms thing is I'm lacking the ingredients
3 more meatbugs and 5 Hellstorks, that should do the trick.
Interested?
Did I play the original?
No.
That sounds nice, like hell it does, but this is the colony, so get used to it.
Also, with the right seasoning, it'll taste just fine.
I sent someone else to get the ingredients a week ago, but he never came back.
We joined the new camp
Where can I find me buds wherever it is rubbish
There's some empty hocks by the castle wall
Friday I'm found judging body looks they taste alright if you cook them
You think this is better than the original
Yeah
Yep
I think I already have five
the area right outside the south gate Pesta broken tower there's a hill where
the stuff grows who's that other guy you said oh that was Nick a water as I said
I think he turned coat never looked too happy here but I'm just guessing what I
know is he went out the south gate and never came back okay how come this guy's
Let's give my orders a go.
Why do you have so many questions?
Chatter, did you play the original?
By chance?
How the fuck am I supposed to get my bearings when there's like no sun in the sky?
Is that it right there?
No, maybe.
This hut does not look abandoned.
Shut up, Scatty.
We say you what do you work out I think I heard one hey
I just mean I was I don't even know where you're from I'm from Corinnes you ever
been there? Oh well, what's the noise? Who is that noise? This guy's starting to piss me off.
Dude it's Mordrag!
way freshy I'm more drag remember that name because I'm padding the words for
the best prices show me the goods show me the goods so you pick oh you got
mole rat grease oh wait we only need two of these
hold I'm gonna become a wizard of hell I thought I had another bow I think I
I sold it, actually.
Get the shit out of my inventory now.
The strong beer sells for 12, dude.
These guys love booze.
These brushes sell for zero.
Why the fuck am I picking them up?
Is there a- I don't think there's a way to sort by value.
Baaah, I'm in here, me I'm in here.
You wanna buy some meat?
About...
About one meat.
Yay!
Wait, what else we got?
hmm essence of healing heal 50
you got a bunch of arrows hmm I don't know if I want to buy those I'm so poor
I think I'm hungry just a thing for me I mean I'm sort of a guest to you so it
only be proper if you shared some we make synchronous told me that they really
Lots, thanks.
You have money, you don't need a barter for everything?
You're telling me I shouldn't exchange the things I always intended on selling
to keep my money where it is, but rather I should spend my money in that situation?
Okay.
Yeah, that's what I would have did if I was fucking stupid as shit.
Sup dawg.
Here are the things you asked for.
Very good.
Show me.
Well then, I suppose you already know there are two ways to conjure magic.
Scrolls and runes.
Most will be capable of using a scroll, but mastery of the runes is bound to the circles
of magic.
However, there are exceptions.
Teleportation runes, for example, or those of the Paladins.
And then there are basic runes which can be mastered even by those with but a spark of
magic within them.
me. I should think so. Arun's inscription functions as a focus. It's what holds and channels
his spells power. And as with the scrolls, you must access that spark to cast the spell.
Let's try it then, shall we? Choose Arun. Commit to the craft and you may even call yourself a mage one day.
Five LP, we have ten.
okay all right
Innos is the god of justice blessings and fire part of these powers he shares with us
therefore you may choose between these two rules one will heal you and the
other will scorch your enemies
Fire? See, I don't know if magic regenerates naturally or not, because if it does, then
I think I would take healing.
Oh well.
And that's it. I can use this room now.
It'll take some practice, but yes in essence you can use it wisely however
Every spell will excrete a portion of your magical power than you must replenish where can I get more rooms?
I can offer what I have on hand. I see stay alive. Will you one room doesn't make you invincible?
Experience
That's what you think?
You can charge it.
This is way more damage than my other attacks.
I won't be falling for that again.
That's pretty strong, but we do not regenerate magic naturally let's see what else he has
Shut the fuck up, dude.
I'm looking for magical item.
Dude, maybe I shouldn't have bartered before.
So these scrolls...
transform into blood fly.
Scrolls are one-time use, right?
Ealing oebs.
Hey Solana say.
Inscription for transform into lizard.
Probably should tell the expensive.
The healing one is 220 more ore, dude.
Dude, I could have gotten the healing one. Sold it to him. Hold on.
I'm telling you, if I see one of them right here and now, I'll give them a proper piece
to my mind blood is fighting ghosts right hey you can get over here can I help
you cool all right which gate is the south gate can I piss I don't know
Mew meew meew meew meew.
What's remarkable, Fools?
Where's the cartographer?
Hey, you there.
You?
Me?
Yeah, you.
You're new here, right?
I want to warn you.
There's some little bastards in this camp if anything can treat freshies like meat bugs.
Lucky for you, there's folks like me.
Gomez wants your in order in this camp, and that's what us waters are for.
is, law and order, don't come cheap. Which is why I'm kindly asking you to chip in.
Let's call it a gentleman's agreement. You watch our backs, we'll watch yours. And if
any of these nasty bastards so much as look at you wrong, we'll kick their arses all the
way to Norbarum back. So, what do you say?
You asking for protection money? I could take care of myself.
If you say so, Greenblood, wait and see where that'll get ya.
See you around.
Watch your back, lad.
I ain't scared of you, bitch.
I'm a wizard now.
Thank you.
The two of us together, we're pretty much invincible.
We could take over the old camp.
I mean, yeah, there's the old bathrooms, but they ain't got nothing on us, right?
I'll come up with a plan.
You just wait and see.
Okay.
Where's the other one?
Yeah, there's the old barons, but they ain't got nothing on us, right? I'll come up with a plan. You just wait and see
Okay, where's the cartographer?
He wore right here
Just
Did the chomping noise read
I
Said where we going or is that surprise? I love surprises
Shoot the fuck up. Oh
Caps girl in the fallen tower by the south gate empty huts by castle wall
okay which gate did he say this guy was out it was south gate right
right that's the son I found it I can't really tell which way it's moving
most but this would be south hey you just do your thing and don't mind me I'll
just stay here and keep your company
send them out to pick mushrooms you think this guy will help me in combat I
don't know why I asked that he's got a club he's got a piece of wood
Bring it on.
He's dying.
I'm coming.
Take that.
Okay, what the fuck?
There's another one.
There's another one.
I'm sorry.
How come this dude ran immediately?
Got him ass.
I might think I'll die.
Put the fucking sword away dude.
Weeeeee.
See you go underground on the bridge, dude.
Surely you cannot.
All right, I'm pulling out the big guns.
It's fucking a-weezy.
That's crazy.
Get your ass back here.
Yeah, where's my boy mud, dude?
Pussy?
There he is.
Looks like he had a shirt on from a distance.
Yeah!
Dude's pulling everything, bud.
Stop.
Stop
Is he leading us right now
he's running around in fear also we're not going south anymore I think
What if we lowered the grass quality hang on I don't really like games that do the individual
blade of grass shit foliage quality yeah let's bring that shit all the way down bro
I can't even tell the main difference of what we got is
of
I'll send him out to go pick some mushrooms, bruv.
Jett's coming come on in
So who's say? Where exactly are we going again?
There's a wolf here, bud. I've been- I'm from the future.
Are these things- Dude, I swear to God I saved after this fight.
Okay, group him up, bud.
Fuck.
slow down big man
I get a little bone crunch noise dude
I got my arrow back
sometimes when you hit it at 5 it does not save
I'm too weak to fight you, head-on.
For that, I'm sorry.
Oh.
Oh, boy.
How come the scavenger meat is less nutritious than every other kind of meat?
I mean, they kind of look undead if I'm being honest.
I found them.
Okay.
Who is that? I think that's Mud.
Nope.
Oh, no, that's him.
What's up, guys?
He calmed the fuck down, bro.
Alright, okay, big man.
of
the
of the
He's dead dude. How's that?
What the fuck?
I put it away, man!
Don't rob me.
You're stuck, bitch. Can't rob me.
Did not hit him!
He ran into your area.
Yeah, I guess I could see me having shot that guy if one it made a noise and two
visually it looked like I shot that guy but instead I could live in the
alternate universe where you are dumb as fuck and witness that somehow in your
consciousness dude.
And no blue rose guy could be.
What's up, man? Leave me alone. At least you can pick a lock. Dude, none of you can
You picked that lock?
Wait.
Little bitch.
Oh fuck. I'm committing.
Hey the meat! I'm on a meat! Drink the booze!
Hey water!
I wanna hit him, though.
Yes! Stuck in the terrain!
I'm so weak.
I don't want to use any last magic on this guy.
Come on, arrows.
Careful.
Would you guys eat white meat?
I guess chickens white, huh?
Kind of.
I
Matt? No, good job dude, good job.
Like that's very impressive and all.
We all know you use the tool, dude.
Feel like that was the same chest.
Dude, I like how you guys were like,
good day, maybe the advertisers should get their money back.
When I spent some time on the lockpicking dude, but this guy actually spent the money
and bought the game to do the lockpicking puzzle dude.
More and more effective advertising.
Mobile game ad strategy?
Yeah, except in the mobile ads, they're not...
In the mobile ads, they're pretending like they can't do it.
I couldn't do it.
Holy shit.
Shit.
Ha ha ha ha.
Can I have your arrows, please?
I mean, I don't know. Where is this dude?
I got it. I...
I don't know. Maybe we should buy some arrows.
Could be quite useful, might.
We have five more learning points. Maybe we should learn something. There's gotta be something we can learn.
Drax can teach you to skin animals. Yeah, but it seems like I gotta go to New Camp to do that.
Because I only got two dialogue options.
Loot Mud. Wait, you think he's actually dead?
We're already died.
Oh no!
No!
Dude!
We were going to take over the old camp, dude.
I don't know if I should be using my water.
So you're right there, I hit F5, F5, F5, F5.
I have been able to save in combat before by the way.
There we go.
Weird.
Alright, let's see how bad these guys are.
Let's go see if we can learn... combat skill.
Actually, let's just keep running straight until we see something.
I see Wolf.
This is the ambush city right here, boys.
Alright, man.
I'm sorry.
Please, proceed with what you were doing.
before I had trespassed upon your property.
Who's your favorite spice girl?
I don't fucking remember.
They like sporty spice?
Scary spice? I don't know why they called her that.
Kinda fucked up.
Old spice.
K2 spice?
Yep.
Get that out of gas station now.
I love drugs.
Okay, I can't fight those things.
Oh, the wolf!
Let's see how you like the power of Christ.
And by Christ I mean fireball.
Ah!
What?
What's that reach?
There's kinda a way to like group all these guys up and hit them with a fat fucking AOE
farm, dude.
I think the blood fight shot at me.
I know that in a Vash and Steel it had like a similar mob and they also...
They shot stuff.
Let's see you kill a man, place the new key.
Good kill boys, good kills.
Okay, nice backboard jog, very good.
Alright, I'll get this guy.
Okay, help, he's gonna kill me.
Yep, not doing so hot.
Oh, they're banished, guys.
What's this combo? Are you chill? I don't think they're chill, guys.
Quickly, while they're occupied.
No.
Yeah, these guys ain't chill, boys. Maybe.
He has got a cool base.
Yep.
Dude, fuck this shit, man.
I'm not opening one of these until I learn lockpicking, man.
It's just not happening dude
Group up boys group up
I'm gonna get a big poll dude.
Oh my god.
Here we go.
Boo!
Triple kill.
You don't mind if I loot real quick?
Holy fuck dude.
There's honestly no point in going though.
You can't believe Mud's fucking dead dude.
It seems like when you get knocked down by humanoids, you don't die.
But when animals do it, you die instantly.
Get in the water buddy.
yep the Goku of Sissy hip now thanks for seven hey you're pretty strong unless
they finish you what determines when they finish you hey you're pretty strong
I mean the game has been hinting that that guy went to new camp kind of maybe we just
You're a duke.
Custom of San Antonio Spurs being down 2-0 against the New York Knicks at home.
Nick's fans suck asshole, but I don't know I honestly reading that I'm not sure who that guy is a fan of
He's charging it up
I'm pretty sure they predicted who was gonna win this year in the Epstein files, so I don't know why you guys are even watching the game
You're wasting your dumb- you guys- you dumb ammo fucking dude.
You're either out- you dude, you- you- you- you- you may as well be watching professional
wrestling here at this point
yeah let's go up the other gate the other gates like full of monsters are way
harder than I am strong but
are you implying wrestling is fake no scripted scripted
Oh fuck.
Oh they got a spoon.
Mmm it's a fucking meat bug.
Fucking love meat bug.
UFC owned by WWE now?
Dude, and you know what? There's never been any recorded evidence or history of anyone fixing matches in any of those sports, including boxing.
No one has ever done that.
Never tell you guys that my favorite UFC fighter is Logan Paul.
Or Boxer? Whatever the fuck you did.
Ow!
We're going back inside to sleep, by the way.
Got to run out of food here, boys.
You know, I bet we're gonna find this guy's body.
Nick.
Bum-bum-meow-meow-meow-meow.
Sounds like something someone who couldn't solve lockpicking in Gothic 1 Remake would say.
Dude.
Someone literally posted the solution to that first chest in chat.
It was a 25 move solution.
Okay.
I do not feel bad about not being able to do that in the 20 minutes that I was trying to do it.
I don't.
I truly do not I truly do not
20 minutes. Yeah 20 minutes. I
Know it seems like an attorney to you guys because you sat down and you did it your first fucking drive
But you know, that's how long it was dude
Why not
It was half of your sponsor segment?
To 20 minutes, 30 minutes at most, fellas.
Your sleep was deep and undisturbed.
Why didn't I heal me then, bro?
Explain, guy.
The first time I slept it healed me.
Well, let's get the meat I guess. Can I have some of your scab, dude?
No, we're not there yet.
There's some chatters pulling up the footage.
Good. Good.
I need to I kind of need to use that to cook my meat, fella.
Hey, maybe I knew haha.
Oh.
What?
Oh
What
It's junk
22 22 to 259
So it was 35 minutes 30 minutes
30 minutes 37 minutes
move on dude
I here is my my humble and solemn promise to you
push that okay from now on if I encounter any puzzle in any game
I'm going to deliberately not try to solve it and I'm going to do random
moves
until I do.
Yeah, I'm gonna miss the fix.
That is my solemn promise.
You already do that.
No, well, now I do.
Well, the fuck is it?
I gotta cook
So you're stupid then why are you are yeah, man
Me
That's a lesson no
Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm.
Shall I buy this game away for GTA 6?
Um...
Just buy it, dude. It'll be fine. It'll be good.
Equip the meat.
Where's the other meat?
I found it.
What are my plans to bring back destiny?
Oh, I don't have any...
Is there a way to pull up my hop bar?
It's not tab.
I don't want to pull my sword up.
There we go.
I'm leaving right now.
Well, the game was out for, like, how long before it shut down?
What are you running in circles doing the quest listen to I listen, okay?
I let me practice this by saying I'm not mad at you or any channel, okay?
That said I timed you up for an hour because you were adding you with fucking paragraphs because I did not play the game
That you wanted and the way that you want it, okay?
You did it multiple motherfucking times, okay?
And I swear to God if one of my guards pulls up your fucking logs the twitch that's gonna laugh at grass because they're gonna see
That the fact that it is making you so motherfucking angry that I'm not playing it the way that you want is embarrassing dude
So relax man
relax I
Don't know where to go. That's the truth of the man
And I'm but guess what I'm going back in
I came in here to sleep because I thought it healed me, and it did heal me the first
time I slept, but it didn't heal me this time, and I don't know why, I don't know why.
That chatter might know.
Maybe man.
Maybe.
I wish to drink my bong water today.
Nah, I don't think you should do that.
I truly...
Oh yeah.
We're gonna go to New Camp.
I'm gonna need a camp.
Where was I?
Little train combat with a guy near arena.
We need that.
I remember I played of action steel so long before getting a combat skill that it was like actually like almost fucking impossible to do.
Meow meow meow meow meow.
I don't think it's this guy.
I don't think it's this guy without a name.
I don't-
I don't think it's guy guy.
I don't think I'm allowed to be in here.
You?
spot the fuck up as I proceed.
I don't see if it's in the headflare.
Okay.
Go away.
Go away.
Get the son.
They don't like me, guys.
I'm just a fucking loser.
I mean, Shirley, that's the guy who teaches us, right?
Wait a moment.
What are you doing here?
Me.
I run there, Reena. Routing up the wages, recruiting new fighters. You get the idea.
A fighter over there, isn't he from the new camp? I thought you guys can't stand each other,
so how come he fights here? Oh, that's easy. After we could scrape him up a lot, there ain't
nothing a digger loves more than seeing a cocky new camper get his teeth rearranged.
Beds are way higher when that happens. And that's good for business. So yeah.
Where are your eyes I don't like those guys either but business is business
Do you also train fighters? Yeah, well not just for fun. You want me to train you you got to pay
50 or
It cost 10 dude and perform parries with one-handed weapons
Can cancel attacks and recoveries
Yeah, it's just like a Bastion Seal.
We're fucking useless, dude.
We're so useless.
Oh no.
Yeah, we're going to go talk to those two guys at the beginning.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Just slinging dead and no fighting.
Yeah.
Just sling dead and no fighting.
Guys were about to pass his grave.
Wait, someone moved his body.
Why are they fucking doing that?
This lady thinks we're seven?
I'm actually getting lost. I swore to God I thought these dudes were
Over here to the right. Oh, no.
There's gonna get trench foot, man.
Ain't no way trench foot's real.
Nah, that shit's real, dawg.
It takes a long time to get trenchfoot.
This is what good mac and cheese sounds like.
I can't fight you. I'm too fucking pathetic, God.
Yeah, I think I'm on the wrong way.
They're up there, right?
I think I was going the right way.
Maybe?
Bro, I just know it can't be back.
Oh no, it is up there, I remember now.
Whoops, no, they're right here.
That's right fellas, careful what you're saying.
Let's go to the new camp.
Alright.
I'll show you the way.
Stay tight.
Please don't.
Please don't kill me.
Are you running?
Looks like such a loser dude who blocks like that. I think you should do that
The old camp is rich, but they do not want to share so we share their goods, are we?
lead on Drax holding right click brings up my up are
I had enough take care of a buddy
I helped.
Yolk?
You can only heal from sleeping in... you can't heal from sleeping medicine. You can only heal through food or through healers.
It's so weird. When I slept the first time, I saw that the health and mana thing said max, but it wasn't max when I did it.
I think
Yeah, you've got you got those tracks you're fucking doing it, bro
I'm helping
Hey, it's Solana said who's next
Is your commuter true is your commute like this every time
Another dent in my weapon.
You're using a bow.
Who's next?
This guy's farming, dude.
Being a bandit's not only about raids and stealing, we're also hunting.
And, uh...
It's a tough world.
Yes plus 100 XP for me incoming 150 you got this bro
go on I'm his NPC companion who's next I'm his mud dude I'm his squire
is this co-op now this is a online multiplayer ranks extraction shooter
battle pass
personalities accept us as we accept them
it's all fun
have a mouth
I'll please kill those guys
how much exp though oh wait let's go pull him get your ass over here don't
him be the you got this bro you got this
Yeah, he's gonna die!
I wonder what happens if he dies.
You got this man.
Oh, he ain't dying today.
Saves.
Yep, I earned all this. No, please!
Haha!
Oh, they got wings. Are you chill?
Yippee!
Hold on.
What?
Get him.
Okay, how much level? How much xp do you have to level?
Huh? Only 1.6k board to go.
Get him, Drex.
So, we're making touches up?
Apparently, the sleep thing might be a bug, some guy restarted the game, and it worked afterwards for him.
I'll say this.
You're about to die, bro. Well, if he dies we can uh, we can take his shit
I can't believe he's dead dude
This is for Drax.
Arish.
Big loot incoming? Question mark?
I'm owning a lot of mana ask the other guy to escort you no way he's dead
oh we're almost there bro
oh my god
it's his quest item on
He died one day from retirement.
He was alright.
I'm sorry.
You guys know Drax?
Let's just go learn one of these.
I don't even want to be here.
Rip hunting skills? Do we need hunting? What's that even for?
It's all in hines.
Surely there's another hunting trainer though, right?
There we go.
They're shooting at us.
Dude, poor Drax, man. He was keeping those... he was keeping these roads fucking safe.
Just load you safe, that's how they camp anyway.
Um...
Wait he's still alive.
Hmmmm, maybe we should try and save him.
I think this is where he dies though.
I missed one of my fireballs.
Let's try again, hang on.
Maybe I can get him to swing on me.
Oops.
You fucking moron, man!
Oh fuck.
They're eating me.
Well, let's do a little further back.
I wonder if I could heal him if I had the healing spell.
Oh.
Nice shooting techs.
I'm going to notice that the loading completely randomizes NPC behavior.
yeah yeah shoot him he's on me I'll distract them buddy
You can't miss though, very important.
What do you do?
Flood fly down, moving on.
Sir?
Fly melee.
Flood fly down, moving on.
moving on what if he's supposed to die wait maybe we can talk to him learn
hunting real quick
next shooting tax
oh my god he's living
The prophet that the threat of prophecy has not been severed today
Here we are a new camp have a drink on me in the tavern
Talk to you later. This is the only guy who's been nice to wait a moment
The only guy what else can you teach me about hunting?
Yes, he goes a lot
But that's gonna cost you a whole lot more than just a beer. I can show you how to skin animals or
Pull their teeth and claws out without breaking them.
Those things are hard to get around these parts, so that makes them precious.
Trader's gonna make you a good price.
You're asking for a lot of nuggets?
Nuggets maybe you can make a lot of nuggets with that stuff kill an animal without knowing how to gut it
And they'll just rot like a damn app which in turn means you missed out on beautiful hide
You could have sold for good nuggets if I was you I'd learn that stuff as soon as I could
What a day
Let's get away from before he suicides on an animal
Duggets.
I don't think there's anything... I don't think there's anything down here, do you?
There's a golden legendary down there, trust.
If this was of action, still there would be, dude.
Only the sound does not become muffled underwater, by the way, but right now it's not.
Who live in here Skellington hopefully unlocked
Just
Okay
Oh
I think the story makes scrolls, but I don't know how to make do you get a fucking horse
such a fat chud-aged entire Papa John's supreme pizza last time I had Papa John's I took
two bites and I threw the rest of it away, dude.
I had like a large pizza, too.
That should have been so vile.
Dude, there's just something really gross.
Like, it got delivered kind of like room temp,
you know what I mean?
And when Papa John's pizza does that,
it becomes like the cheese on top becomes one solid mass
And like slides off.
It slides off.
And that's what it did.
The entire layer of cheese on that one slice of pizza I bet it into came off all at once.
Nice food pizza's not it.
Dude, I mean...
Yeah, you're right. You're right.
Who gets delivery pizza?
I don't know, man. People who want to eat some pizza.
There must be some truth to that story.
Always, bro. We're bandits, mate.
May don't need our bloody colonnades and on
Oh do you like their farming is this rice
The hawk
I am the wall
Welcome man
Nice to see a new face. They're here long. Oh, yes
Marybeth
I was one of the first.
You must have a pretty good idea how things work around here.
Well, it depends. I'm just the lonely rice picker.
Then again, that's probably why I even made it to this age in here.
No fights from the waters, no scheming over that bloody ore, no hunting for shadow, big storms.
I'll just do my job, and in return, I'll get me grubbed in a place to sleep.
Could be worse, you know?
Why did they throw you in here?
The tithe, lad. The tithe.
Had a cursed harvest and not even enough to feed the misses and the kids.
Then the bloody bailiff comes along and says the tithe's doubled this month.
The bastard knew what he was doing, of course.
Anyway, I couldn't pay, so the soldiers came and chucked me right in.
But yeah, that's how it goes.
I strongly agree.
That's so fucking sad, dude.
That's so sad. So fucking sad.
Dude, it's Horatio.
What are you doing here? You looking for trouble?
No. Trouble from Hill. A race farmer?
Just because I work the fields doesn't mean I'm helpless against guys like you.
Like you if you want to be in just say the word
Sorry for what I said earlier
What sorry for what I said earlier
I don't know what about you bitch won't talk to me
hold on do you treat me take a pic
oh he's got candle and bread and rice
there are things I don't know mate
Look at him working our arses off. Still looks like he ain't enough to feed everyone.
Is this what it sounds like in a fucking race paddy?
What kind of pests do you have to worry about in a race paddy like frogs?
Don't take everything you hear.
Frog.
Thug.
Bleaches?
We're gonna find a manage, they've made their home in the back of the cave, continuing their research, protecting part of mercenaries.
Hello fellas, you're working hard or hardly working?
Omega low.
I found a secret, guys. I found a secret.
Kappa?
I wonder if they're just gonna let me in.
I ain't seen you before. You planning to go through this game?
Are you gonna stop me?
No.
But you all know what you're walking into.
This place ain't nightly on camp.
You sure ain't a swamp camp neither.
We do things our own way, Gunny.
How?
Right.
First off, there ain't no Templars or Warders looking after you all the time.
And here it's heavy bloke for himself.
Thus, Merck's are the only ones who stick together.
Merck's?
I think I heard about you.
You protect the water mages.
The mages and the ore?
Yeah.
We work for General Lee this ain't about riches for all that unlike going base in his line the old camp
We ain't giving up on getting out of here one day
Ashley forget that we will get out of here, and that's what we're fine for sure do anyway
You thinking about joining the new camp? Can I do that? Well, that depends
The rice Lord's always off the new lads for the fields the scrapers ain't gonna turn down a bit of help neither
What if I want to do something else than farming or mining?
Listen to him all I and my are we well guess Laura's and his crew your best bet then
They ain't much use for nothing if you can show him you got brawn and at least a bit of brains. They might give you a shot
What if I want to join you the mercenaries
ambitious
That's it
We're a tight crew. We don't just take anybody
Try your luck with Laris first.
If it gets around you got some skills,
might catch Lee's eye.
What do the mages do?
Most of the time they study the blue wall.
Their plan is to blow up the whole heap
or minus of dugups so the magic will shatter the barrier.
Sounds dangerous.
I say it's safe.
Oh, okay.
So you have a giant pile of aura lying around in the camp.
Don't get any ideas.
Well, was it?
We do.
All right.
We gave this to King Roba, he'd probably sell us his wife for it.
But he can keep her.
We're getting out of here.
Nothing else matters.
Where are you keeping that pilot?
Got you curious, eh?
There's a hole in the middle of the cave, covered by a grain.
You can stare as long as you like.
I'm warning you.
Don't even think about nicking something.
We've got to rise on it day and night.
Don't worry.
How much more order do you need?
Okay, but we're getting there.
Scrippers won't die in nine.
Besides you mercenaries, who else lives here?
Farmers, Scrippers, Majes, and Norris's gang.
Fine. See you around. Watch your back, man.
This guy is chill.
Jarvis, tell me where you're keeping your giant pile of mud.
Hey, you
Fuck off
You can't make
That's not all for you.
Ooh.
Yoink.
Yoink.
Yoink.
Yoink.
Yoink.
Yoink.
Yoink.
Yoink.
Hmm... it's lockpicking hard? No, it's pretty easy. It's pretty easy. It's pretty quick and easy.
of
the cave
A new look!
Hey, a new face!
Where are you?
Born.
The mercenary of the mages.
We're gonna sleep around here.
Well, the huts are all taken.
But you could go and take the trunks.
He's a bandit who just claimed the hut by the edge of the cabin the other day.
It was empty, but actually, it belonged to us.
Who's us?
The mercenaries.
Merks and bandits don't share the same quarters.
And normally, Larris is meant no better than to hog this side of the cave.
He tried to lessen and you can add their health for yourself.
Okay.
Mercenary of the mages?
Yeah.
We protect the diggers in the new mine and the ore pile of the war mages.
You might have heard of our commander, Lee-
Ew!
He's a foreman general and he put together the best fighters of the colony to start a mercenary crew.
That's us.
How do I join the new camp?
If by that you may join in us Merrick's you'll have to be a way better fighter
Doesn't matter what kind of steel but you have to be good with it not to mention you have to know your way around the colony
To say plainly
No chance in the world Lee would sign you up as a now
But you could try Larry's in his head
be seeing you
Hey, so I'm just a fucking loser understood
I'll huck by the entrance. Wouldn't it be this one right here?
Hi.
I've had enough.
Oh no.
Dude he's so much stronger than me.
Holy fuck dude.
Let's see if you can handle this.
Okay.
We draw our weapon, but not super far away.
Burn fool.
Hit this guy.
Hit this guy.
Hit this guy.
Hit this guy.
No, he knows combos and shit.
I can't beat him.
I actually can't beat this guy.
I want to become a murk good for you Lee only takes the best of the best though till that
applies to you you should go shake hands with Laraz and his guys if you want some advice
Try and steal something important from the old camp or the old mine.
That proves you're against Gomez.
And that's half the deal.
And how should I get my hands on something so important?
That's your job to figure out.
If I was you, I'd try to win their trust first.
Then you rip them off.
That's pretty smart.
Hey, you'll just slow it down a bit.
What's your story?
My story?
I look like some storyteller to you?
Just trying to get to know people around here.
Hmm, makes sense, I guess.
With all the bastards under this dome, it's easy to forget what a normal conversation goes like.
My name's Torloff.
Used to be a first mate in the Royal Fleet.
What happened?
Let's just say, mutiny was involved.
And it wasn't as successful as a mutiny should be.
Now I'm here.
Loser.
What is your job here?
Among other things, I manage the scarce material we have.
If a mercenary needs it...
Grass mage and northern lights and grits.
This place is cool and all, but their wizards are water mages, and that's lame.
Yo, he's smoking a blunt.
Okay.
Which is abandoned?
I need a better armor.
I need a better armor.
No can do, mate.
Larrae's is gonna rip me out if he finds out I'm selling our gate to Stranger.
I can't believe I've been here.
Archer trainer?
Okay, I'm sorry.
Guys, I'm sorry.
Chill.
Hey.
Hey, you.
You. You. Me. Yes. You. Come over for a second.
Right. What do you want from me?
You haven't been here long, have you?
I can tell. Listen, you won't make it here for long unless you pick up some skills.
I could teach you. And just because I'm in such a good mood today, here's a free lesson to get you started.
Watch who you talk to. Butch, for example, that guy by the campfire. You should avoid him.
Why? What's the matter with this Butch?
Well, he has a habit of greeting freshies with a fist to the face. Just trust me stay away from him
What can you teach me, bro? What can you teach me depends?
What do you want to know?
Dude, I have no money
You found the lock picking train
Hey, how's it going depends?
You're looking to buy something. I'm looking for new gear
13 damn
23 damn might be time to sell all of our shit. Maybe not all of it wait
This guy's undercutting us.
Because the beer that we were trying to sell in town sold for 12.
What a piece of shit.
You're one of those cultists, aren't you?
We call it the Brotherhood.
But yes, I am.
My name's Kagan.
May the sleeper be with you.
That scrunched up his face, is it?
What brings you here?
Well, originally, Master Ibarian sent me here to look for new souls to join our community.
Sadly, it turns out most of the guys here would rather kiss an orc than open their eyes
to the sleeper's truth.
Since then, I mostly sell Swampwood.
He's the plug, bearded.
I can barely keep up with the demand show me your wares as you wish
Green novice. Oh these heal manner
This will heal our man up all the way up. Does anyone remember how much the one-handed trainer in
The old camp was...
10 LP, 50 ore? Okay, we have exactly 50 ore.
Well, I mean, technically we probably have more of them.
around the lake tavern all day where he sells his swamp weed for rice schnapps he's a drunkard good for nothing
maybe i could help you pellet your swamp weed
as long as you're not a member of the brotherhood i can't entrust you with a full batch to distribute
but maybe you could help me hand out some gifts appetizers if you want some of the
Right, I'm gonna go to the start magnificent herbs as soon as they do they'll come back for more
Can you just say you could hardly keep up with the demand? I did but I already informed master Kalam about Isidro's uselessness
You'll send a replacement soon
Say I hand out these
Appetizers for you. What's that for me? Oh, we'll think of something
For example, I could give you some scrolls that were imbued with the sleepers magic
Alternatively, I could even help you get accepted into the Brotherhood if that is your wish.
Master Coulomb decides who gets a novitiate, but I know a trick that could help you.
And if I'm not interested in that?
Well, then I'd be happy to pay in cold dull awe.
A hundred nuggets on the spot.
Be careful.
Alright.
Hand me those rolls.
Who should I give them to?
Anyone, really.
Most guys in here won't turn down a free smoke, but remember one wrong purpose. I am one more thing
If you lose the herbs or smoke them all by yourself, our deal is off
Understood how many are you giving me?
Ten oh, I gotta do some man show me your way as you wish
60
But if we hand them out, we get a hundred
Can I interest you in a herbal
Drugs dealer, I'll give you 10 free. Yeah
If you ever got a shift more come find me
Dude, I'm selling drugs cool. Can I interest you in the herbal?
hahaha all right then 10 or if you ever want to get rid of more you're gonna make
200 or off of this for why he doesn't ask me for the money that I made selling
them and he better not hey can I interest you in the herb could need one come
find me how about some green novice no thanks anybody surprised yep that's what
I wanted to do hey wait I'm got some smoke rolls you all in I do you can
come by more often if you have more blah blah six more to go let's give one to
butch did he could probably calm down a bit can I interest you in there if you
give me what should you want to what's more heroic than selling weed
and wouldn't want to be in his shoes.
You look like you could do with some small plead.
You got anything?
Let's take...
Go away.
Same old story.
Interested in some herb rules?
Pleasure doing business with you.
thanks bro you know where I am dude they're gonna hire me because I'm like
their dealer now wait I've got some smoke rolls you want one sure here's ten
or give it to me every birthday only lurk you can drop by more often if you
Happy birthday
Fuck dude, I might buy all of a
Blade
Okay
I've got smoke. Why not?
My bias that weed. Here it is. I don't know where she did the others want some too
What
Go away.
Go away.
Achieve the people to train you?
Yeah.
Wait a moment.
Interested in some hurt?
There you go.
Is that the photoshop mode?
Okay.
Yippee!
I like this guy.
He's cool.
Jump's over you?
Okay.
jumps over you okay I gave out those appetizers so I heard the first new
clients already approached me good work how should I compensate you give me the
money I'll take the nuggets fun here
you know like okay don't go around tell you there's someone that teaches a weapon
wait you're one of the water mages aren't you what do you do here adenos's
blessings child you are I think I am a water mage my name is cronos and I'm the
Keeper of the or I also help others steal their minds and trade with magical
paraphernalia maybe you wish to take a look
uh why would I talk to the water mage about fire mage so free stupid
I want to strengthen my mind I want to strengthen my mind
a loadable endeavor let me see what I can do
huh how much was it to learn lock picking how much LP was it 10 it was 10
I want to learn one-handed
What do you have in stock you selling rooms bitch transform into lurker
Who's got rings
If we get a ring of power, we can use that other short sword we got, plus 15 mana.
How many rings do you have, one or two?
Plus four decks, plus four string seams in a pod?
It doesn't tell you where you realize the requirements to use stuff, it's like, I don't
remember, this is 14.
It's only four more damage though.
Two plus cock ring.
This, this is a big upgrade for us.
12 damage to 21, 21.
Hmm.
I feel like 15 men is a lot.
like each individual fireball we shoot out is one man
why is that?
Hmmmmm
you learned skinning you can sell palts for money
fuck dude how much
I think so is there is our one-handed trainer here
Surely he's on a dope it
He an old camp scatty, his name?
No.
Like surely the guy named Blade teaches one handed here.
Wait, here's the thing, though.
You can learn acrobatics are a really useful skill to learn early.
Couldn't we learn lockpicking so we can start robbing chests?
There will be a lot of choices, there's nature things for some of it, either that or we learn
One handed and hunting.
Hell.
Where is the dude? You.
What can you teach me? Depends.
Okay, you make up the four mistakes before breaking a pick, reduces locks complexity
by removing a connection between two pieces.
Breaking a pick does not reset your progress in a lock.
Okay, we're gonna learn... fuck, dude.
Mmm, maybe we wait. Maybe we wait. Hold on. Let's do hunters first.
Let's get the hell out of here.
That's worth. Yeah, no, I know I know it's worth but...
I think...
I can't remember how much it was to build up.
We're gonna get that man in a ring.
Maybe.
Nah.
Nah.
do skinning first yeah how do you know which which one of those is even good
remember how in a lot of action steal you would slip if you were sprinting over a
puddle. Classic. Weee! Remember when you did it so many times that you leveled up and
became immune to it? Yeah, we got a special talent. Looking extra ball today. Do you spray
wax your head? Nice. Generate like a static amount of grease. Wait, they're alive again.
I'm still a fool.
I don't want no trouble.
I got to kick my ass.
Just a fuckin' level 2 crook bitch.
Wait, did we summon him because we got the half HP, or...
I don't think so.
There we go.
Dude, Drox mobs us so fucking hard, man.
that's where the mine is I think follow the trail of dead bodies
I'm dead it's over I haven't said
right dude
Why can't I save?
There we go. Very good.
Oh, we're gonna pass Mud's corpse, dude.
Let's see if he's still there.
Yep, still there.
No more blood, though. That's nice.
I'll dry it up.
Skin them so can you skin stuff that's already dead?
What else can you teach me about hunting as it goes a lot, but that's gonna I can show you how the trader is gonna make the fuck up
Let's you extract fur
50
Should I get fur or skin reptiles?
For only one LP, huh? All right. All right
First and foremost skin from the front to the rear. Wolf and shadow bees hides are great for making clothes
Did I did I have exactly 250? Yeah, I'm such a poor piece of shit, dude.
Let's go see if we can skin bud. I don't know if he has fur though.
Nah. I know there's a wolf corpse up here.
Hey buddy.
Got it.
This is the only...
I think this is the only thing that I can skib.
Do they use his hard earned money to improve sell dude? I got my Microsoft certs
We are gonna sell stuff so we learn one handed
Easy one or tell me there should not worth one dude, please
use. That guy wouldn't have lied to us, right?
Hey you! You must be the freshie who's been trying to get into our camp.
if I am well I could help you how I saw a guy right outside the camp bragging
about how he's stolen some sort of amulet from the orbearance nicked it
right off the last convoy he probably still has it on him if we take him on
together we might just make it I can't do it by myself what do you say what do
what do we do with it? What do we do with that amulet? What do you think? I'll take
it back to the barons and give myself a nice word. But don't worry, I'll tell them you
gave me a hand. That'll earn you some points with Gomez. Forget about it. We go haves where
you can beat up that guy alone. Alright, alright Hobbs it is. Guess it'll be enough for the
two of us so you're in I'm in great tell me when you're ready hey I'm new here
I got two fireballs you think that's enough boys hey I'm new here
He hasn't been eating more all but they know I'll be back, but I got to cook some meat
They're not going to work
I've had better he's off screen
still wouldn't want to be in his shoes all right man
you gotta be careful let me just eat some meat real quick
this guy's gonna betray us isn't he must be some truth to that story
wait hold on let's go learn one-handed
do you go smoke and weed bro he's so fucking cool he doesn't know I'm the
plug
where's the dude who buys stuff
fuck off
What's my plug name? It's ham new here. Ham new here. I feel where the shop is, or a shop.
shadow. You saw stuff? No.
bug empty words is what it is found it
it's got fucking dead oh my god they are dead
that's so fucking sad bro
I can't even loot them though.
What's the point of being dead if I can't loot your corpse?
They curked out.
What does that mean, Shatter?
Dude, I can't even remember the name of the...
I guess, uh, what's his face? The wizard, actually.
Er, maybe the Merel.
You?
He has $11 reduced.
We have to make $50.
Look at this, $12, right here.
one hand
sure, whatever, minus one
hey you now, what now? I decided to give you another shot to buy into our gentlemen's agreement
just ten nuggets and you're in
what you say?
yeah
I can take care of myself
of course you can
see you around watch your back this guy just keeps threatening me but he never
he never makes good on it bro how am i supposed to trust this guy hold on
that's fine
perfect
i don't think we're gonna make 50 dude
Dude.
Nobody's ever...
Someone said that Pelt was selling for two?
I don't believe you.
Surely not.
Surely not.
Hey.
What do you want?
Just checking who around here.
Manon, you wanna join up with us?
And I try to kiss some asses.
Well...
Yes.
Nothing wrong with that.
I could put in a good word for you with Diego,
but I'm gonna need a favor in return.
What kind of favor?
take those nuggets and make a run for it? Sure, you could do that. Just keep in mind
a colony is a small place and I know main bastards everywhere. Okay, give me that ore.
I'll fetch the sword for you. Good. Here you are. Come right back once you have it.
Let's go rob this guy.
This guy is zero foot...
Never mind, he's 26.
Two? Two!
Oh, the king's tidy heels are minty.
Two! Dude.
I spent 250 to learn this.
Oh, this heals me in a tube.
I am razor.
you gotta be fucking Josh of me bro
you gotta be Josh of me
selling to the wrong merchant
I don't care
I don't care and let me tell you why because I could not for life of anyone
tell you where the fuck the proper merchant to purchase this would be but
see here's the thing I don't think there is a proper merchant
find out if I find out that guy and try to get upset about having it for running in circles
is gonna get very angry guys. It says he has twenty six.
You look tensed. How about some swamp weed. Straight from the cultists.
Show me your goods. Best stuff in the column.
Dude, we gotta learn it. We gotta learn how to make this shit. Holy fuck.
What you saying, man? Dude, the guy, this guy is upselling. The guy, the, the dude at,
the dude at Nuke Camp, the cultist was selling these for six.
Yeah, maybe. There's a piece of shit.
I won't be falling for that again.
I want to use this, dude.
Hey, we can sell our lockpicks.
I want to be honest.
This is me.
This is me.
This is me.
This is me.
This is me.
and by some I mean all of it we need one more how about a hellcap big man all
right it's time to learn combat also I don't even know where the market this
looks like a market but I don't know if that's like the market market you know
I mean
I feel like I went the long way I'm trying to find a scatting
Yields catman
And then we're gonna talk to the guy at the front and then he's gonna betray us
But I'm gonna be prepared because I have combat training
And then I'm gonna fucking stab him with me sword
He's like oh
This is like he's gonna use the Epsilon me freshy. You're a freshie Mike. You shouldn't be able to carry souls
What the bloody hell?
Where is it
I think I crushed these earlier and then I forgot to loot.
I never know.
Should be more mine if you want.
Blah blah blah blah blah. Shut up.
Y'all seeing scatty?
What's your language my kid is watching?
Freshy freshy freshy freshy freshy freshy freshy freshy freshy freshy freshy freshy freshy freshy freshy freshy freshy freshy freshy
I actually do not remember. I thought he was like right around the arena. Maybe he's in
this office. Excuse me. I'm looking for your boss.
He has some, uh, healed-bear pictures of it.
I guess I'm just a stupid asshole, dude.
Am I traumatized off of lockpicking for now?
Yeah. Yeah.
Oh, that's him up there, I think.
What the fuck?
I guess so.
No, this is a guard.
Oh.
Nope, that's a shadow.
What the fuck, dude?
I'm still looking.
Kick me in the loop.
Okay.
Wasn't Scotty in the new camp? No.
Right here?
Yes.
Do you also train fighters?
Yeah, why not?
It's time.
I want to be better with one-handed weapons.
Good choice. Much of it comes down to posture.
Some amateurs cling to their weapons like newborns to their mother's tits.
Don't do that for the fight itself momentum is key. Don't stop after you've landed a blow
Oh, look at the guy's bow and score the next one
He can also use your sword to parry if your opponent attacks you yank it up catch the blade with your cross guard
What else right?
When you're about to swing but already see the other one dodge don't go through with it pull back and sidestep before it's too late
But finally some blows do more damage than others
Hard time landing these critical hits as a beginner
So don't count on it, but the better you get the more often you land
Okay
We know one-handed
Maybe we should use this guy's money to bet
Yeah, yeah, I want a bet good to hear there are any fights that next to be in a couple of days
Slash me takes out a loan to gamble what's the worst the good app
Wait, let's go this way
A level crust, thanks for showing it.
Meow, meow, meow, meow, meow.
Hot-side Canada Scout.
Jack!
Oh well! A new face!
What do you want?
To offer you my help.
You're new here. And you folks usually find themselves in trouble sooner or later.
Lucky for you, I run a little charity to help poor bastards like yourself.
And for just ten nuggets, you could be a member yourself. What do you say?
Rod Suckham. Thanks for seven, nice name.
And what does this membership get me?
Why, protection, of course. As long as you're in my district, I'll make sure you're safe.
Suppose a new camper arrests you, or a loon gets angry because you tell him to shut up about his sleep or nonsense.
You can count on my help.
And if you happen to start a fight with, say, a digger, well...
I'll always help the charity member first.
It's that simple.
One of his two members fighting.
Then we'll pop open a beer and cheer you on.
But that rarely happens.
What if I don't pay?
Oh, don't you worry. You're new here and still learning the ropes. I understand that we've all been there
Just take a look around to get your feet wet and come back once you're in a more generous mood
There's no ultimatum
Simply be aware that my charity depends on donations and my let's call it Martial Aid is therefore sadly limited to members
I'm sure you understand
I'll see you around. Be careful.
How come everyone's trying to...
exploit me?
What was the name of the dude who wanted... hold on.
Fisk.
Where'd I do that?
Where'd I do that?
That's dusty.
It isn't like talking.
I mean, this looks like the market, but I don't know.
I passed some.
Where?
Like, I assume...
We can't go in these buildings.
Under there?
Under where?
You've had your fun.
Hey, you're new here, ain't you?
I'm Fisk, peddler of everything.
Whatever you need, I'm your man.
What are you doing here?
I'm looking for a sword.
Not just a regular one.
Something fancy with ornaments.
Well, then you're one lucky bastard.
Because I have one just like that.
It's not worth listening to.
The Shadow Warden never came to pick it up.
Just 110 nuggets.
What do you say?
Where you gonna sell up for a hundred
Way right it wasn't a hundred and ten. It was five hundred five hundred not enough
How about a thousand then works for me? Don't come to think of it. Maybe I'll just keep this one for myself
About whistler's sword tell him he's never getting it back
Show me your goods.
Ermm, guys?
Hey armor. 313, man.
Dude, I don't remember where Whistler is.
Here's the guy whose ass will beat.
I got the impression he was not going to sell to us no matter what.
I don't know why my question didn't update.
If I wanted to be poor and weak, I would just live instead of playing this.
I don't get it, like if you take, you derive no satisfaction from like, stirring at the
bottom and then arriving at the top, you just want to skip to the top.
Where are these dudes going?
You want instant gratification?
Now, now, now.
Now, now, now.
No struggle.
You don't wanna, you don't wanna kill ten rats?
I straight up do not remember where this guy is, hang on.
We have gone in a circle.
Was he over here?
Uh, this will sell me the sword, but he now wants 110 for it.
Oh, and now you want another 10 Nuggets.
Do you want the sword or not?
Fine, yeah.
Now make he snapy.
Try to rob this guy.
I don't think I'm powerful enough, I'm just going to give it back.
I failed dude.
I have zero, I actually have zero money right now.
You have to keep it to yourself.
Dude, that chatter when he boots up a game place for an hour and isn't like deep thro-
the game's not deep throating his dick, being like,
Dude, you're the greatest fucking superhero of all time!
No one can kill you, dude, you're invincible, dude!
Why did I spend money on this?
Don't like this
Oh my broke. Oh, we invested 250 nuggets into a skill that gives us two nuggets per kill
So technically technically we only have to kill 125 wolves to prop it off of our training
I've killed one so far. I gotta go pee. I'll be right back
you
you
you
you
you
you
you
you
you
you
you
you
you
You
What up fellas?
Let's go get that amulet music to my ears
Where are the odds this guy stabs us in the back?
One hundred.
Hold on big man.
Where was the... here it is.
Okay.
Mana heal.
Very important.
of
the
wait for these guys
is that the way is this guy and here we are
far out where Diego can't hear you blood wins and
the
Hehehe.
Alright alright.
How do I switch torches?
I can't tell if I carried those.
Eat this flower? You mad?
you like that you're on fire now bitch didn't know I was a wizard did you
You bitch.
Oh god.
Come on man.
What you got back up?
Huh?
Shoot us!
Oh, I gotta finish eating my grilled meat.
I don't have any blunts to smoke.
I got no arrows.
Okay, can I only vary like actual swords or what?
How does this, how does this shit work?
up grim I'll kill you
I'm not I'm not pressing any buttons
what we chill here we are bloodwinds
All right, let's group them up.
Don't fly me that bro.
What the fuck was that?
Okay, I killed the other guys.
Where was my stab, dude?
I know what you're going to do, you're going to try and kill me.
And here we are, Bloodwind sent.
I'm getting in trouble.
Dude, look at this.
I mean, you just eat the black horse.
I have another one, man.
Alright.
Oh my god, I get like way more experience if I kill him.
Sweet.
Teleports into the ground.
I
Played it
So what now we go talk to blood when we're like, yeah, I killed your jobbers
I'm guessing this area is off limits?
is only Gomez's men are allowed inside the castle this guy's chest play what the fuck
i need to go in there i have a letter for the highest fire mage
and now you expect me to just let you walks in there and grab your reward yes all right
show me that letter forget it i'm not that stupid good for you
I want to work for Gomez and why would Gomez want to work with you
How about you test me see if I got what it takes pay that works
You need someone to vouch for your one of the old ads so before you get to prove yourself to me
You're first gonna have to prove yourself to him because guess who takes the blame if a fresh he fucks up
Right
Look are you bash for him?
All right, but there has to be something I can do for you. No
The things we waters take care of a way out of your league freshy. I'll say it again
Keep slower and someone to badge for ya and prove yourself to him
whatever you need done I can handle it desperate to failure fine come to think
of it there's one thing only someone with no ties to Gomez can do but I'm
warning you fuck this up you're in deep trouble I'm ready for that job you
mentioned I'm ready for that job you mentioned fine well I'm about to tell
you stays between us that clear clear good we got trouble with a guy from the
new camp more drags his name and he stole from the
all barons now he ain't the first rice eater to do that but that bastard pushed
it too far he didn't just steal from us he also fences their shit back to how a
man we can't let that stand but more drag knows damn well I can't move
against him. Why? Because the fire mages protect him.
Why do the fire mages protect this Mordrag? Because he works as their courier. Our mages
are in touch with the water mages from the new camp. They send each other letters. If
I kick out or kill one of their couriers, let's just say that could get real ugly.
Nice typo. What about me? If I handle Mordrag, what are the mages going to do to me?
refreshing so they ain't gonna do shit I on the other hand I'm responsible for
what my guys do around it that's why it's so bloody important to keep your
mouth shut about this you want me to kill this guy I want me to kill this guy I
want me to make sure I don't ever have to seize mug again how you do that is up
to you I know where he is I think okay what do I find this more drag at the
South gate the other side of the castle he's there all day smoking his brains
out doesn't have the guts to come any closer sounds like the mages are your
real problem they are but one that's hard to solve a few years ago the shadow
tried to kill the highest fire major he sleep the next morning they found his
body in the hour ring scared across it that is I'll take care of it I'll take
care of it okay
Here I come, Mordragg.
Ooh, you're gonna be so mad when I kill you, when I eat this flower and then emulate you
with my fireball.
This guy's just hitting a rock out in the open, dude.
soon you have a problem you have a problem I do yeah there's people here who
want you out of the camp then why don't they send someone to take care of that
that's what I'm doing right now you know you're a smart lad surely you got bigger
plans than becoming one of Gomez's lackeys come to think of it we could use
Someone like you over in the new camp
This camp is too small for the two of us. Sorry what won't be making the same mistake twice
You stall from the orbearance across the line. Ah, so that's why you're here
Why didn't you just say that?
It was a prank.
I was just pranking you dude, stop.
Oh no.
No please!
Flower up, flower up.
Why is he running it?
Dude ran in front of my bullet, man.
hey wait is it true you're a core what if i am i like to have a chat with the fireman let's see
well us mage couriers get a seal that gives us access if you were one of us you could get one too
hmm how about i kill you this camp is too sorry
thoris sent me he wants you gone
thoris is it i could have guessed
I wasn't supposed to tell him that.
But I did.
Flour up!
Do not get shot by this guy.
Do not get shot by this guy.
I'm on a flower, no not.
I'm on a flower. No, not
Oh
Kiss off fuck sake. All right. All right. I guess we're leaving some right schnapps
Yeah, I think I got fuckin' giga-mogs.
Wait, hit a bunch of heroes on them.
Dex plus five.
That means we can use the new bow.
Yeah, I sold it.
Hey, wait.
Um...
Oh, that's nice. He still wants to do business with us.
Sweet.
The longbows were 73. Everything's good.
Let's sell the longbow.
buy airwrap
Don't do water heels manna dude, I didn't even realize
You mean that shit
You have to kill him because you told him who sent you
Yeah, don't worry. We're gonna kill them. We're waiting for them to walk out of town, though.
You've had your fun. Now leave the diggers alone, alright?
I'll sit this one out.
Plus five dexterity! I don't know what that does!
Chance of success while locked with it.
We're in for a bad time fella.
I took his weapon so he doesn't have a weapon.
He's doing strings!
enough magic for you
He took my rune.
He took everything.
Oh my god.
Bad.
Yep, picked up.
Yep, take that.
See you dodge this.
Okay, we'll see you dodge this.
Come on, man.
Do an attack, coward.
You know what?
Yeah, beat his ass.
Oh, there's here to watch. That's nice.
Dude.
See you outrun fire, bitch.
Okay, it's doing a pretty good job.
Here.
Get him up!
Bro!
There ain't no way.
Ah!
Come on!
Ah!
Ah!
Ah!
I'm gonna know!
Fuck you.
That's all I need.
Each shit.
We're kind of running low on magical flowers that kill our man though.
We did just buy some water though, that's nice.
I couldn't loot that guy.
I got a feeling our dude is no longer at the gate.
You think he already did?
You already did take everything in.
Okay, all right, good.
Uhh...
Not bad, Greenblood.
First try, too.
Not bad at all.
I'll remember this.
I love old dude as my...
Okay, can you recommend me now?
You guys seem really cool.
Diego said you're the guy to talk to if I want to join the old camp.
Did he?
Guess he wants me to give you the run band then.
Or make it simple.
The only one who can take you in as a shadow or a water is Gomez and the only
way you get to go through the gate and talk to him is if someone we trust
batches for you like Diego. Go ahead. Then I guess I'll go talk to Diego. Do that.
I
Spoke to force and
What do you say that he'll let me see Gomez as soon as you think I'm good enough
Looks like I got a new job then you knew this didn't you?
I'm level 3, I'm plenty powerful.
Give me the rundown. How do I convince you?
Daisy, you have to prove that you're worth your salt.
There are some key figures here in the outer ring.
Most of them are shadows.
And press them.
And it'll earn you a reputation.
Once you've done that, I have my own test for you.
Oh, and lastly, learn some skills.
The more you know, the more of an asset you are to us.
God fucking damn it.
Okay.
Where do I find these key figures?
Well, you're looking at one.
Thoros too, but you already know him as far as the others go. You'll have to figure that out yourself
If you can't do that then you've got no business here anyway
Just take a stroll through the outer ring and talk to folk. You'll see who's worth coming up with
You can teach me some skills around here for starters stick to fingers
You've got the swiftest hands of all of us besides him. Just ask around
You'll find people willing to teach you some tricks if you can persuade them
Where do I find his fingers?
He lives just a few shacks over, right by the castle wall.
When you're in front of the castle gate, just head left towards the arena.
Can't miss it.
How's my reputation in the camp?
How's my reputation in the camp?
Interesting you'd ask.
I talked to some folk.
And?
As for Sly, I think he's wrong about Nick.
That man wouldn't stop complaining.
He never struck me as a turncoat.
About Thoris, he said we could use a man like you.
let me tell you that's worth a damn lot that's it I think keep at it you'll
have to try harder if you plan on going places in here such a fucking loser can
you teach me something sure why not I could help you improve your dexterity
or get some strength into those arms.
Hmm.
Strength.
Uh, man, we have like an odd number of...
...thing.
Was the- was the- was the water mage at the new camp going to increase by mana?
Yeah.
Meow, meow, meow, meow, meow, meow, meow.
Come back soon.
Don't think that's it.
Let's go talk to Fingies.
He said neck to pick up mushrooms.
Do I have like no fucking armor and it's actually like a bullet or anything?
Do I- oh no I don't...
Who was the dude who needed the meat bug? Shit.
You. Oh, right.
He's too close we brought him the recipe
Look at your ingredients Grail get you in trouble just a moment and this she will be ready here you go
Trust me. It tastes better than it looks
And over
Who I can make meat bug graduate you now
I want to... I think I want to join this place primarily because fire mages seem colder than
water mages.
Just one time I want to carry someone's attack, though.
That would be sweet.
Why not the weed mages?
I feel like we should sit around and smoke weed.
I already missed this guy, I think.
That's not cool.
I think we gotta sleep.
Nobody ever asks me.
Wait, hold up.
Alright, dude.
Watermaid just saw you at a deal weed.
So that guy was a swamp mage.
Or whatever the fuck they're called.
Where could this dude have gone?
No resting bones.
See look, I'm healing now.
See?
Maybe it only heals you every so often.
Hey peaceful rest.
We gotta find fingies, bro.
Meow meow meow.
Wait.
Can you have sex in this game?
I don't know, bro.
I don't know, man.
Man
Pretty sure it's just dudes
So grabbing sex is with other dude prisoners
I've seen this guy so many times that cannot fuck you remember it
Yeah, I swear to God. There's got to be a way to sneak inside
Buy a map?
Hmm, we might be able to afford one.
Oh, Jesus.
You guys see that?
Or is that just my monitor?
Yeah, what the fuck?
not in front of a shack because of daytime dude we I've seen him during the
day
who are you learn smithing you seem to be good at this no one's complain yeah and
And they best know. Every arse when he needs a bloody sword, I'm the guy who makes him.
How long do you need for a single sword? Depends. A basic one I can whip up in the blink of an eye.
If you've got the nuggets, that is. What about something more intricate?
Well that can take a bit. Worcester had me do one like that a while back. Paid me a 450 nuggets
for it but I'm telling you it was the right nightmare to make felt like I was
talking to a princess ordering her wedding gown the way you wouldn't
shut up about all her ornaments and flourishes
how's business what do you care maybe I want to order something I'm still
trying to figure that out thank you yep fuck you this whistler guy be ordering
fancy swords huh but why was it was he right here
what the fuck is this 2026
So it says to the left of the gate, the the castle.
And the hut is attached to the inner wall.
It might be too early.
I don't know.
Hey, buddy.
I want to become a shadow then you should find yourself a nice spot of sunlight you
know what I mean I'm looking for folks to put in a good word for me now why would I
do that because Diego says you're one of the key players ah why didn't you lead with
that yeah I guess I could give you some backing thing is I have to be sure you're
good for something say do you know your way around the lock no pity you know
scatty the guy with the punchable face who manages the arena he has a big chest
in his hut and in that chest is a ring bring me that thing and you have my
vote oh can you teach me the skills to do that why not what do you want to
I'll take care of it I'll be waiting
get lost man Jesus so is this one impossible without knowing the skill
No. None of them are. Is this his hut right here? I assume so.
So.
Ay-ya-ya-yi.
Kind of wish we'd learned locker games.
I need a key for that.
He's dead.
What the fuck?
Dude, it's probably crazy how much easier this is with the lock figure skill.
I don't know what to do with this game, but I'm not sure what to do with this game.
I thought I had the second one selected.
I don't even know if this is the right chest man, I'm gonna be honest.
So this is the only one that moves alone, you know?
That's so fucked up.
Are you trying to piss us off?
Yeah dude.
Don't talk to me about it.
Fuckin' Jesus, man!
I need a key for that.
That break might pick when I'm back down.
It did.
Not if they're a key.
Son of a bitch dude.
You just let everybody have lockpicking?
I could. I could do that.
I keep forgetting which other one moves this way, I think it's this one... no.
Jesus.
Jesus.
Look said chat.
I don't know why.
You guys are fucking dicks man.
You guys are assholes dude.
I don't have the right key.
I don't have the right key.
I don't even know why I backed up.
It breaks my fucking life pic.
Tutorial in the glossary.
Okay.
Well, I guess that's it for this video, and I'll see you in the next one.
I'm sorry.
Yeah, that was the that was information we've already
Divined
I
It feels like an IQ test that you're failing.
I don't have the right key.
Great.
Three are connected.
Figure out those three first.
Yeah, just figure out...
Just figure them out, dude.
Okay.
Okay.
Unironically, see here's the thing though. Okay.
No.
I want to get this top one down to the bottom.
I
Fucked up
fuck dude
It's so crazy.
Oh
I
It's so annoying.
What's the other way to move, okay?
So like having four of these up doesn't mean shit because I could have gotten to this point
and completely did something wrong like like at this point understand what you are seeing
right now this is I saw a bunch of people in chat type paugers or like weight champ or
whatever dude that means this means nothing because I could have incorrectly gotten to
this point which means I would have to start over to go the correct way essentially you
know what I mean?
So all the partners in chat, listen up, big man, like you don't know what the f*** you're
looking at right now.
Please explain how this works.
You have to do a certain order and a certain, you have to do everything in a particular
order.
Okay.
That's it.
At least as it stands now with my lack of a lockpicking skill.
I don't have the right key.
So, like, I understand that it literally, yeah, what that chatter said.
It only matters if all six of them are up, and I have solved the puzzle, okay?
I
What else moves the pet one?
we want we want these three synced up
I
Yeah
Oops, oops.
Look at this solution.
Gate 3 left 2.
Look at this.
But that didn't work.
The first instruction in your post is gate 3, left 2.
It's literally incorrect.
I'm about to hit A to move this to the left, assuming gate 6 is closest to you.
Why would you start from Gate 6?
Dude, look how crazy this is!
I need a key for that dude.
It's actually insane without any like without any skill whatsoever is actually fucking insane.
I truly do not know how to do it.
I truly do not know how to do it.
I'm trying to fill out the dumbass solver
from just watching it.
Post the solver and chat.
We'll solve it real quick.
This isn't the quest chest, by the way.
Okay.
All right, let's see this.
Uh, Starpin...
Yeah, I have to- dude, that's- even the solver is complicated, look.
It's 33 steps if I did the solver lid.
Well, we learned today you don't need education to make money.
Solve it, bro.
You have the floor, my doctorate friend.
You have the floor.
The whole world's watching.
Mm-hmm, mm-hmm, mm-hmm, mm-hmm, mm-hmm.
You give me the monthly sub-money? Uh...
Say, I...
If I could guarantee you wouldn't cheat, yes. Sure.
But I know you will.
Look, couldn't you do it out of the kindness of your heart?
Okay, isn't it in the best interest of those who have knowledge to share with others?
Okay, you clearly see me as someone who is intellectually afflicted, stupid, even.
Shouldn't you be willing to do charity work for me, a poor, truly bum man?
Or maybe you don't want to because you can't.
So the difference between you and me, friend, is that I'm willing to admit that I can.
But you've deluded yourself and you're thinking you can.
I'm trying to set up the solver.
Let's see here, I see I'm confused because please tell me the gates are one to six and
not six to one.
How far I got?
Jesus.
It's six to one, I bet.
Why would it be that way?
There's nothing on the...
It's first on this website that would even indicate...
This one better?
Uh...
I mean, I don't mind the the first one.
Start pin. OK, I'm going to assume it's one to six. OK.
God, I hope it's one to six.
three, four, five, six.
You need to know the length?
Yeah, I know.
I was about to test it.
One, two, three, four, five, six.
I'm going to go with the length.
Yeah.
I'm going to go with the length.
I'm going to go with the length.
Then is opposite four
Two.
Okay, it's opposites.
One.
Four and six.
Okay.
That's five, not two.
That's why one of six kind of topped the bottom.
I just don't know why.
How did I already mess up?
Recheck.
One.
Four.
Six.
You are on gate two right now.
Yes!
You shut the fuck up. Shut up. Shut up. Shut up. Shut up.
Thor is the same, not opposite.
You're right, you're right, you're right.
Not bad.
Um, my bad.
Three is opposite six.
Two and six, same.
Same for two, opposite six.
Same four. On six. I don't think I made a mistake I might have. No, we reset. Solblock.
According to this website, it is 23 turns.
Okay, let's see. I could have gotten it wrong. So let's see.
One, two, three, four.
Step two.
Gate two right once.
Step three.
Gate one right once.
Gate 2 right once.
Gate 1, uh, sub 5, gate 1 right once.
Step 6, gate 2 right once.
Step 7, gate 1 right once.
Step 8, gate 2 right once.
Step 9, gate 1 right once.
10 gate to right once
Right, all right gate three left three times step 12
Step 13 gate five left once
Step 14 gate to right once step 15 gate four left once
Step 16 gate 2 right once.
Step 17 gate 4 left once.
Step 18 gate 2 right once.
19 gate 5 left ones.
Step 20, gate 4 left ones.
Step 21, gate 6 right ones.
Step 22, gate 4 left ones.
Six right three times.
Why do you struggle with simple things?
Simple things!
Simple things!
If you count all the extra moves, there's a 33 step solution that has to be done correctly.
Otherwise, there's no like, like, oh, maybe I'll take a slightly longer way to the solution.
That is the solution.
do 33 correct steps in a row so yeah I think we're gonna wait till we get some
lockpicking skill before we we ever open another chest like that again