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R.E.M. poster. What do you think about The Great Beyond? I always thought I think it's
a pretty good song but I also think that it's sort of just them making man on the moon too.
Like man on the moon is is such a good REM song that I feel like the great beyond was like we need
a hit. That's right you can't reply to me except in REM lyrics which I fucking respect by the way.
I respect that you don't break character to the DVD commentary.
French Cinema? Not today, I did Spanish Cinema. I watched Golden Balls. I don't know anything
about Spanish Cinema. I thought that this was a movie. I saw it on the Criterion Collection
and said, hm, Javier Bardem, Benicio del Toro,
ah, Margarit de Lemederos,
surely other people have seen this movie,
I can't wait to talk about it with them.
And then I watched it and I logged it on Letterbox,
and it's got nobody has reviewed it in history.
So nobody knows what the fuck I'm talking about
when I say nah, man, nah.
I mean, I didn't like the guy, but you hate to see that.
It's all right.
I mean, I definitely would not,
like the last four movies or something like that,
I would definitely recommend watching
to stay up on the lore, the Northern Lion lore,
but you don't need to watch Golden Balls.
It's just fine.
It's not bad, it's 90 minutes,
but it's not, it's unessential viewing.
Let's put it that way.
Does heavy air show balls?
No, it shows a lot of chest.
It shows a lot of chest, for sure.
Which is enough for some people.
Doom generation kind of sick.
Oh, really?
sick that they iced that convenience store owner for nothing for charging them
six dollars and 66 cents for four dollars worth of food it's sick and bro was
still talking after after his fucking head popped off well he was pretty old
dumb and dumber ass
Watch Kingdom of Heaven last night, Director's Cut.
Why are you talking like Minecraft Steve?
Kingdom of Heaven, Director's Cut!
You don't talk you ain't seen the movie man, so I'm trying to finish this coffee same problem ain't got no damn lid man
Hey Joe Rogan of the left, what's your next 30 max 30 wattage? I don't want to answer
I would normally answer but your name is cycling Jake
Cycling of course related to biking and then
Jake is like isn't that like 1930s slang for like a detective?
or something like that you're a damn bike cop man what is it dog fuck I don't
know Chad librarian can you check my my 30 minute peloton PR it's probably like
255 to 265 watt 30 second I don't know man I mean it for the little 30 second
wattage come on I thought you were a cyclist man
I don't have the damn bike computer with the, I've seen people, they spend more time analyzing
their data than they spend pushing the damn pedals.
I'm a different kind of beast.
Not to offend literally everybody else in the Pelopon discord except for myself, but
I hop on the bike.
I push the pedals for a minute, I go, how am I feeling today?
That informs the rest of the ride, I should say.
Everybody else?
My trainer rode AI says that I'm over-trained,
so I'm not allowed to ride the bike today.
My trainer rode AI and my HRV data from my smartwatch
have told me that I might be over-training
a little bit too much, so I should take a day off
or spend the day in zone one.
None of us talk like that.
That's how you sound in my head, anyway.
I want to defend your defense of the Karen haircut and say if it was dyed green or purple
motherfuckers in your chat would risk it all.
Source I did it in 2011, I said 2011, 2011, been happily married ever since.
You didn't say marry, but I inserted that there.
I apologize by the way.
No, dude, let me see
The Karen haircut ain't so dude. It's not bad now. I was joking if I may I
Was joking when I was referencing Kate Gosling because that is really bad. I'm not fucking with the Kate Gosling
But like the 90s
Like your mom's friend's haircut
But not the one with the, okay, so now I'm just judging individuals here because I'm looking
at Google images.
Not the two-tone one where it's like a pinwheel of two different colors and one of them is
like copper and the other one is like platinum blonde.
No, no, no.
Not that.
The streaks have to be, it's got to be a little bit more tasteful.
I'm looking at it now. That's too much. Some of these are pretty good, man.
Where the streaks have no name. Yeah, where the streaks have no name.
Wonder if that's a song that I've heard the most where I have no idea what the
fuck he's talking about I know when he goes there he fucking goes there with
you but what the fuck else is he talking about that's every song for me couldn't
be me I'm a lyric maxer. Maybe I don't like Karen haircut maybe I like Pixie Bob
well our Google images is telling me that the Karen haircut that I think looks
good is actually called a pixie Bob I typed in Karen haircut and I got
exclusively pictures of Kate Goslin and then I typed in Pixie Bob we got
Emma Stone, Winona Ryder, a lot of AI-generated individuals for sure. A lot of individuals who
are not real. Almost exclusively pictures of individuals that are not human beings. It has
been a while since I've used Google images, man.
Dear Northern Lion, please say Bitcoin. Bitcoin, the audience booze. Socks, the audience erupts
in outrageous applause. Cawk, the audience is very con- some of the audience is cheering.
of the audience is silent and a large part of the audience is confused.
Well, everybody stands up and they're crying, they're exalted.
No one has ever spoken truth to power like this before.
Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, hang on, we'll start playing this fire in just a second.
Where's the fire, man?
And now I need your opinion on a daytime activity for a tourist in Vancouver.
I'm here for the week, the week, so this week, this week, you're here for this week.
Well, first off, enjoy because the weather's fucking awesome.
I would also say I need to know where you're at.
I need to know where you're at.
Because if you're downtown, it slightly changes.
If you're out at UBC, it changes.
If you're out at, if you're in Burnaby, it changes.
Fuck it, yeah, pull up.
Nah, I'm gonna be honest with you, you don't wanna pull up.
A lot of kid activities this weekend.
Lower Lawsdale, that's North Van, right?
That's basically downtown.
Well, I'll tell you one thing you should do if you haven't done it already.
You gotta ride the fucking sea bus, bro.
Ride the sea bus down the waterfront,
oh, I mean from waterfront station,
you could do whatever you want, man.
Shit, that's hard, because now like,
okay, here's what I would say,
are you an active individual?
You should do the grouse grind
because you're already in North Vancouver.
So unlike the people who stay in downtown,
you don't have to like catch a really long bus
and get stuck on the bridge and traffic to get there.
If you're into hiking, wake up early one day,
do the grouse grind.
So there's like one morning for you.
In downtown, honestly, the go-to move for me,
for tourists in downtown, rent a bike
just across the bridge at like the west end of Vancouver.
There's lots of bike rental shops.
Rent a bike and just ride it around the seawall.
Either take it from Stanley Park
where you're gonna get the bike basically,
take it east and then south and then around downtown or actually even better I
would go west from there go through English Bay down and around the the
south side of Yale town past Science World go through Falls Creek and then
check can you take can you take bikes on the Aqua bus or will they throw you
in the in the water because I'm just I'm picturing like an idyllic fucking day
you could you could they let you do oh my god oh my god then you could take your
bike onto the Aqua bus when you get down to like kids you get down to that
park Vanier Park and kids you could take your bike on the Aqua bus take that
ship back to Yaltown or even better make a fucking day of it and go to
Grandville Island I don't know what you're gonna do with the bike though
Now that I think about it, I don't know what you're going to do with the bike when you're
on Granville Island, but I guess bring a lock.
Hey, Aquabus!
No bikes on Seawall at Beach Avenue at night?
Oh, no, no bikes on Seawall at Sunset Beach?
Have to go to Beach Avenue?
Really?
Wait, wait, wait.
Which one's Sunset Beach?
That's in kits, right?
No, that's on, that's an English bay.
What the fuck did they do to my fucking seawall, bro?
I don't even want to mention this because they did maybe two years ago.
They added a 15 minute Vancouver scenic ride, the Peloton, and it pisses me off because
it's not like in sequence they start that shit at like English Bay and then
boom one second later there's a transition your asses out there like
Spanish banks in Kitsilano then they do another transition boom you're in
Yelpown and you're like what the fuck is this bike like going through black
holes or something like that are we going through a fucking poise it is it
so much to ask that you at least edit it in a logical sequence okay bro I'm
play and slay this buyer. You go to Berrytown. I'm not one to look behind. I know that times
must change. But over there in Berrytown they do things very strange. What a fucked up stream
this has become. It's so like 1961 late night coded. Out of nowhere just busting out
classics from the American songbook.
I was listening to any major dude will tell you in the car this morning.
You know why?
Tax day.
I've never seen you looking so bad my funky one.
But it's true man, when the demon's at your door in the morning it won't be there
but sometimes he comes back with a second demon.
They ain't gonna be around forever any major dude will tell you any major dude will tell
Guys I can't stop winning
Slade Aspire 2 I
Don't want to like spoil every YouTube video for you
But here's how every single YouTube video of Slade Aspire 2 that I've recorded this week is gone
I start the run, I lose on the first boss, I restart the run, get a random rare where I go,
I don't even know what this card does. I have absolutely no idea what this card does and I
think it sucks and it doesn't do anything and then I win easily. I play the card that I got
from my, I go up against the door maker and I go, there's no way I'm gonna beat this guy
And then I just beat him
And if you don't believe me, I mean
They would off the ironclad has made it to the top like look at this shit man
Let's sit in here going like what the fuck am I doing with this one? Oh, wait, where's the ball the door maker fuck you, buddy
Oops died on the first boss to the van them
Go back to the know the defect has made it to the top. Hey, buddy. Hey
Fuck you
And I was going the whole time I did the run. I went I don't even know what this car does
I have absolutely no idea what this card even does. I
Was I was playing it for zero. I was playing it for
200 damage. I didn't even know to the best of my knowledge. I still have no idea what it does
But anyway, I think that means as always we're back on the silent
I
Wanted to I wanted two colorless cards can be pretty good man. Let's give it a shot here a
Shockwave dude if we could get a sly shockwave it would be kind of insane
Also feel like a thrumming hatchet kind of crazy for a character that does no damage
So I mean, I think that's like we're winning either way no matter how you stack that up. I'm feeling
You know I'm pretty good about that one
A little curve to the left here.
So were you guys fucking with me about Snakebite?
I still don't understand if it's good or it's a meme.
When I asked, everyone said it's good and it's a meme.
I don't know, man.
The world's a twisted place.
And there it is.
And there it is, right there.
I think if anything, what is this,
it puts it on top of your,
oh, at the start of your next turn,
return this to your hand, okay.
I'll just take a dagger throw.
Dagger throw just seems like, it's like a pommel strike.
It's one of those things you can just add
and not have to think about too hard.
You can always add a pommel strike,
you can always add a shrug it off.
You could always discard a defense.
It should say Sly.
Put your arms around me, baby.
Put your arms around me, baby.
I like a Pearson Whale.
Don't mind it.
Low key, Sugar Ray's best song.
Anybody going to take the under on that one?
I definitely think it clears every morning.
And don't even give me, if someone's going to say some day, some day is right there.
Some day is a joke.
Some day is when they sold out.
Now every morning I think is okay.
I'm not going to sit here and say I've never, you know, listened to now that that's
what I call music too.
And that's track two on it, I think track one, of course, as we all know, you
what you get by the new radicals. I mean, you're only going down from there, but that's not sugar
raised fault, man. You're summoning an enemy. Why is that sentence so hard? You're summoning an enemy.
You're summoning an enemy. You're summoning an enemy. Hard-ass sentence, man.
I'm not a skewer head. I like dagger spray
Okay, what do you do 14 damage too vulnerable for free literally all you have to do in this entire game
All you have to do in this fucking game take the you fight the first enemy kill them
Take the best card that they offer you from the first enemy
Then only take cards for the rest of the game that have exactly the same keyword as the card that you got from the first enemy and
And upgrade your rares upgrade your golds if all of your golds are upgraded upgrade your
Your blues if all of your blues are upgraded rest. That's it the end you will win at least 50% of your runs
I'm proof positive, bro
Magic drafting is the same way I got blackpilled in magic the gathering I
Was that a pre-release?
Definitely should have done that. Ah, fuck it. We wait.
I was at a pre-release for Shadows over Innistrad.
I built what I thought was the perfect synergistic, like two-colored deck.
I don't remember the colors because it's been a while.
But I played against someone round one who made a quad-colored deck
and just destroyed me, just rinsed me.
me and I went how did you why did you build quad color and they went I just
got good cards I got good cards I got cards that I wanted in all four colors
so I made a four-color deck and I was like motherfucker pissing me off
meanwhile I'm like I'm sure I have 17 lands or 18 lands I don't want to get
I don't want to get mana screwed
Okay, inky shives that apply weak is pretty solid man. Does it make three of them?
It does. I mean, I like all these to be honest, but blade of ink a little a little more playable
Eight damage you take zero I'm afraid
You would despise commander players?
What the hell?
Costs an additional gold.
Oh!
Ah, shit!
I didn't do the math, I was like, I'll just play this in a strike.
Now this does give us the chance to get Rainbow Ring to pop, which is like basically a
power in and of itself.
I think we can do much better with a power than infinite blades.
We'd pass on this.
I don't hate commander players.
The only thing I hate is when you tell someone
you don't really like Magic the Gathering,
and then they say, oh, you've never played commander.
And then you explain, though I have played commander,
I was the fourth one, the guy who got eliminated 15 minutes
in and then had to sit there and politely
kibitz the entire game while they spent another 110 minutes
deciding who eventually is going to win.
You need this card in that much.
Just throw a dash in here.
Is a card with my name in the new set?
That's actually awesome.
Are you Jace the Mindsculptor in chat?
Jace is that you?
I'm supposed to kill number three first, my bad y'all.
What colors did you like to play in Magic?
I don't want to tell you because you're going to be like, there's your problem.
I'm an Izzyhead man.
Even when it's bad, I like to play blue-red just because there's spells, and those spells
trigger enchantments, and those enchantments let you draw, and those draws let you peek,
and those peeks let you scry.
And every time you scry and you put something on the bottom, you put another token on
your enchantment, and then when you take the tokens off your enchantment, you get
to scry.
And then at the end of your turn, you're like, okay, my turn was nine minutes long.
I did two damage and then I scoop. I scoop. I'm dead.
I'm gonna be honest. I think my... Well, this is interesting. You know what?
I'll take Phantom Blades. We need something to kind of like build around.
You hear about this red button, blue button, shit? Yes, I have.
But I don't fully understand the, I guess the societal context of red button, blue button.
My limited understanding of red button, blue button is that it serves as a signal for what
kind of individual you are in society.
Red button is logical.
Why wouldn't you press the red button?
The red button, if everybody pressed the red button,
no one would be harmed.
Blue button is, I love my fellow man.
Red buttons, the only answer.
I try not to get sucked into this stuff anymore
because I see it as kind of like an ethical version
of like 98% of kindergartners can solve this math problem
but only 2% of adults can do it,
Which is basically almost always just an ambiguously written mathematical expression that for some reason uses the divide symbol instead of putting the whole thing like over what they're going to divide it by but, um,
But the dress, okay, the dress is fucking white and gold. That one I'll lay my fucking foot down. The dress is white and gold.
I don't care if it's literally blue and black. The picture is not blue and black. The picture is white and gold.
Ships gain retain with inky ships kind of crazy man.
Now if only we had any other ships.
I'm not falling for decades old bait.
You're going to fall for it and you're going to like it, okay?
Odds that I kill you next turn?
Let's make it a guarantee.
Certainly would have had you, but I like festive popper.
Can I say, I do not subscribe to the same belief that my teammates had, oh shit bro.
When we were playing Slay This Fire co-op and they said like, oh who gets festive popper?
Who gets the last pick?
I think festive popper is alright man.
Okay, if you're right it is bad in co-op now that I think about it.
8 damage versus like a thousand HP is not not as attractive a situation
Maybe my good friends are on to something
That's huge um
You know what fucking bro hit me for eight. See if I give a shit I
Take it if the team agrees me to have first agrees that I get first pick next relic
Can I say something? Obviously you don't even have to tell me. I already know you press red.
That's the most I'm smashing the red button answer about Slay the Spire I've ever seen in my entire life.
We run this time kid.
Well, let's see, we have no other means of getting vulnerable.
What wins us the run?
We win this fight by drawing inky shibs as often as possible, which means draw is important.
And also, by playing thrumming, thrumming, robbing, robbing hatchet?
No, it is.
What the fuck is thrumming, man?
Haqua. Inky Ships. Huge.
Don't say throbbing hand job. Yet he's going to do his listening wins parody again.
Magique takes his package in his quivering hand.
I can't get it out of my head coming back up
Coming my head
They should got too many ships what a tangled fucking web we weave man. I think oh
It's dump some trash this deck can actually bang man
It's pretty good.
Discard your hand next turn to tax deal double damage.
I don't know, I've never really taken this outside of a discard deck.
10 damage to all enemies, repeat for every enemy killed.
I've never taken this but I've been interested in taking it every single time.
See 15 cards from the regent.
Choose any number of them to add to your deck.
I mean, it's that's fucking funny
Ring of the what yeah, we don't take this bro. We'll take ring of the Kendrick actually although to be honest that extra draw is pretty nice
um
You may re-roll each card once
So can I say something
YouTube gets mad at me when I win runs on twitch
So we should just take noble glass and then if we win we'll be like, what do you want me to do bro?
They gave me they gave me noble glass. I had to take it
Mm-hmm, I'll probably I might end up taking zero to be honest
Okay, let's look at this like from base principles, I don't think we can have like a star I
I don't think we have anything that will allow us to hold stars.
Two cards in your draw pile becoming minion dive bombs is probably literally good.
I also feel like Photon Cut is okay.
I mean, kingly kick with a ton of draw, maybe?
OK, bombardment, if we had any way to, well, no, no, no.
If we could make it sly or something,
that would change the story.
But I do think charge is OK.
Anybody else got something they like here?
It exhausts itself?
Yeah, for three fucking energy, bro.
Kingly kick. I just don't see it happening, man.
Spectrum shift becomes one cost on upgrade.
Okay, you know what? And powers enable the ring.
So I think you've got a case to be made there.
If I may say something, beat into shape in a
shift deck seems interesting, because it could conceivably
create a sovereign blade that could easily be forged like I don't know five or six
times it's at least it's interesting now was that like the best strategic option
no absolutely not but like welcome to zane bro I think we definitely want to do
this and then have we played a skill no no then we have to play echoing slash I
wanted to play I wanted to get rainbow ring popping first but we could have
done that in a way where we don't take six damage but what's the half life on
6-7. Goonies never say bye, man.
I'll just take the blade dance to get him out faster.
Powers seem good with rainbow ring. I don't know, we might have ruined our whole
Let's see you do your shape an assassin ain't a blade of ink. Let's get a feel for how
How this could actually work
Unless I can just kill you this does 60 this does five with a forge 25
We won't have the ability to maybe I just try to fucking
Kill you instead mother fucker man
Forge 40 is kind of crazy, but also like not taking a shitload of damage for no reason kind of goes crazy
Your decks already 28 cards. I literally win just so you know
There is a shop am I really gonna dump two good potions it's already been done bro
Crazy echoing slash opportunity.
Literally not possible to kill you with an echoing slash,
but still.
Picked up this drunk guy in my Uber Friday night,
I was playing Deacon Blues on Spotify,
the guy cab yelling at me to turn it up.
Dude, I hope he gave him five stars.
Dude's Rock!
That's a certified Dude's Rock moment.
Any chance I can just beat your ass raw, man?
Do 11 plus 12.
I can do 23 damage to you?
Are you trolling?
And they're gonna take like a billion damage
No, man, we might be in hell. I don't know. Let's see what the shop does for us. I
I would happily we want more strikes because we have a power that buffs did we not take the power the buffs block
We did okay, so then let's let's have less strikes
But one of them is better
Merchant potions do 12 for future reference. Yeah, well, I mean they also
Give us a hundred gold here, and they also do 12 damage to like you yourself. Did you know that for future reference?
Chant up to three cards with a droid.
Okay, Kusari Gama is like too good to pass up in a shiv deck, I think.
Am I really going to take accuracy when I need to thin the deck?
Yes.
Yes, I am.
And then I'm gonna try something insane. I'm gonna try to get spectrum shift into a playable
tear. Oh, I can do anything! That's right, because I have fucking the Tent Man! No!
Fuck it.
Alright it!
This guy's gonna be a fucker though for sure.
Okay what the fuck, what the fuck are we doing?
This might be the turn.
We definitely have to play Blade of Ink.
That's a given.
I'm just gonna go in on you
We don't have well you should play a neutralize the question for me kusari gamma is is solid
Do we just take a little bit of block?
And then beat you in this shape
So that on the next turn I can hopefully kill you with like a with less cards
That was pen they've unfortunately but
That's a pass for a guy like me.
Additional seven block, additional first shift is 12 damage.
I'm certainly feeling like we're in a tight spot, but let's keep it going, man.
You're also pretty bad for us.
You're also kind of horrible for us.
Hey, we got extra block out of Tuning Fork.
will say is fake but all right so we have about 12 days is in our draw pile
that's not necessarily awesome
I gotta kill you we absolutely have to there's probably a way to have done it
there. But what's done is done. Borgé. I'll take an expose. I'll go to a 29 card deck,
man. I don't give a fuck. Start cutting some bullshit. On ironically, snake bite good just
for solving this fight as silent. Now that's something I haven't considered. That is like
that's a 20 Slade Aspire 1 thinking. It's like, I'll take this card that isn't that good in
all situations because it uniquely solves one situation for me. I'm not even being ironic.
Like that's actually how you have to think to be successful in that game. Consistently
at least anyone can get lucky you know case in point myself echoing slash will
do 13 damage but three shives puts us on pen nib for the next turn I love it
with one of these
Same situation let's beat that ass
You play on the streamer client it's a living
Yeah, there we go get some decks get some strength
Are there two shit no there's not really two shitty cards you want to transform there
There's like a one shitty card. We want to transform there
Phantom blades is pretty good piercing whale pretty good, you know
We don't look the question is do you just play a defend for six or do you play a charge?
Of course, I'm gonna play a charge and I'm gonna turn these two cards into
Minion died bombs and then hope this somehow we
Had suffered no consequences for our flippin behavior
Discovery where the hell did that come from? Oh?
Because of the spectral shift
Okay
Shoves gain retain. You're a status. We are guaranteed to draw a frantic escape next turn.
So this turn, Discovery! Discovery! Yes, man!
How-Pow! How-Pow! mentioned.
A skill. A blade of ink skill is crazy. And then our next attack will give us a
strength index upgrade
this cost zero
that went fucking crazy
ten damage forged twenty i mean the
the blade is in doing all that much damage but it might get us there regardless
i think he doesn't wait a turn
like a piercing whale
a frantic escape?
Possibly two frantic escapes.
Even though Fasten gives us one extra strength, one extra dex with Minion
Dive Bomb,
I think just putting yourself further away from death is very sensible
when we're so likely to kill you anyway.
in theory at least
so it didn't work
um...
you're doing fourteen
we'll hit you there
thirty two
bucket bro we ball
surely attacks exist
Bullet time. Now bullet time is very interesting.
I don't think bullet time is interesting at all. I think you just take it and don't even think about it.
First card you play each combat has played an extra time.
First card you play each combat.
I will say, okay I think all of them are good. This guy might be the goat, to be honest with you.
Seven block every turn, really useful for a guy like me.
First card you play each combat doubled up, maybe not that useful because it's just an
extra assassinate, I mean even that is pretty solid.
And killing an elite upgrade of four cards, kind of awesome considering we have a thirty
card deck.
So I think like all of these are very takeable.
be it seeing 15 cards from the regent and taking like three of them as a joke,
um, I think we want to take a campfire rich path because of the cookery.
Maybe we will fight every single elite.
He he he he.
Okay.
If I, if I may say so, because we can rest at every campsite, I think we take Warhammer.
And we kind of roll the dice a little bit.
Someone's got to go.
It's a backflip into a phantom blade to give us rainbow ring.
dance kills you. Kusaragami went off. We could do five and then ten damage. There's not enough.
But if we drink this, ultimate sacrifice becomes free. Or ultimate strike becomes free, I should
say. Oh, Gorge, that's true. Gorge. I don't know if we got there though, without it.
Assassinate. We need to play a skill. We have a skill. Wonderful news.
Honestly, this time let's play Fasten just to minimize our risk of taking damage.
I'd love to play Phantom Blades too, but so be it.
We have a skill.
We have a power.
And we have an attack.
I think Rainbow Ring is kind of insane, man.
I need some blocks.
Really don't want to use
a pen nib on neutralize, but...
Can nib neutralize gang?
I'm like, just be honest, I ain't the only one.
Probably a good situation to play bullet time there.
But you know, we'll save it for the next guy.
Brian Johnson tweeted out that he ate his wife's pussy. Any thoughts?
My thought, again, not being on Twitter,
but knowing that Brian Johnson is the vampire immortality guy,
Please tell me that he spun it into a way to like teach a lesson about a business to business sales.
Please tell me that the lesson was like there's peptides in the in the pussy juice or something like that.
Nope. It literally just says, I ate her pussy. Good night.
Oh, no, no. Then it says this is her vaginal microbiome report 100 out of 100 score.
her sample is dominated by the single most protected bacteria species of
a genetic and host lactobacillus chryspatus chryspratus chryspatus was here man
only about 25 to 30 percent of reproductive age women globally are L
chryspatus dominant and dominant usually means above 50 percent she's at
98.7 percent that's like the new version of the Kevin Smith sex tweet
but even less cool. He literally said my wife's pussy is platinum.
The pussy score is off the chart, man. I can kill 150 HP dummy. Nobody in history has ever killed
a 300 HP dummy, so we don't even have to think about that. Sassinate, accuracy, expose.
laid-danced puts you into a position to use an ultimate strike for 45 damage I
mean the way listen I he he knows what he's doing I hope for her sake at least
but he did it does kind of sound like he's he's going like no babe yeah babe
your pussy's infested with bacteria but it's fucking it's the best bacteria
that a pussy could be infested with. Yeah, your pussy stank and stank good.
Why not, man? Pussy's so good at improving my sleep scolar, huh?
Babe! Nah, she probably a freak too. I mean, she married him.
18 damage or a forge 25 and then just draw a blade dance next turn that feels pretty good.
Not blade dance sorry bullet time I mean either way we didn't get it.
You chance oh thank you pen nip because then I can tweak in you you're doing 11 that's
Like a perfect amount of damage for a guy like me
His decks actually kind of crazy man
Probably your powers makes more sense
escape plan sorry I have a heuristic my heuristic is I never add cards on the
third act the third act is for adding maybe a couple
relics I'm not saying it's the right way to do it I'm just saying the stats
don't lie well this is gonna fucking suck
When the hell do we get Centennial Puzzle, man?
13 block.
Rainbow Ring popped again.
Word already in a good spot.
Okay.
Phantom Blades is still really good.
You need Inkey Ships, 32 damage.
You're like infirmly in Get-A-Life territory.
That wasn't even that bad.
Reflex draws two.
Not very good right now.
Footwork on the other hand.
Footwork's real nice.
Retain this shiv so it does more damage next turn.
Might as well play it.
Is festive popper on fire?
Nah.
If it wakes up it's over for us.
Choose one of three cards from your draw pile to add to your hand.
Since when does this individual do this much damage, by the way?
Crazy.
Well, it would have been a crazy poll.
Whatever. I put up enough block anyway.
Is soda or might as well go for a soda, the best Canadian song ever?
No man.
VIP Daniel, are you here?
Mom, pick me up.
They're saying Kim Mitchell is the best artist in Canadian history.
Can somebody do the math for me so I don't have to do the math?
Well I guess we could do this anyway.
I just want to see a pen nib with an inky-shift finish as the job it does.
definitely not the best Canadian song ever. I mean without a doubt it's in like
it's in the top two and it's not number two but for they forgot about Justin Bieber.
It is the best Kim Mitchell song I would say for sure. He'll 10 or add regret for
300 gold. I gotta I mean I gotta heal 10 man because like the odds of this last
question mark being a shopper pretty low
not to like Vancouver post chat always informs me about celebrity deaths and I
always get mad about it and please by the way the man just died so don't don't
go say who who nobody fucking told me that John Garrett the legendary
Canucks color commentator died. I was live the whole day. I had to find out randomly watching hockey night in Canada
You gotta go I thought someone told you no one told me bro
One of the best to ever do it absolutely man
I'm just playing cards but when playing cards feels this damn good who could blame you
we're afraid to tell you in case you shouted at us okay well there might be some validity
to that, but we're still at plating. I'm not sweating this at all. It just surprised me
because I was like, when I saw the news, I was like, this news is fake because somebody
would have told me, but nobody told me. Upgraded attacks do three additional damage. Holy
We should that was an elite don't say we got the news that's a glib time for that okay?
I can't play bullet time I don't have the energy I'm a fucking fool
You got me all shook up man
Wait, but I'm still peak
Cardinal Ophishal came to my school. I don't want to hear shit about this. We have a Cardi house. I
Saw Cardinal Ophishal play
The Festival of Lights in Vancouver, which is a beach
Firework show, and I'm telling you bro
The six seven HP
Worst concert I've ever seen in my life. I think if you're from Toronto that might be your dude
But literally all he did was play like half of his songs
Stop and then say like shout out to the Toronto Raptors. We're like buddy. Nobody cares
We're like 5,800 miles away from Toronto right now. I
Mean like we're we're rooting for him I suppose but at the same time like we we we don't care man
You haven't gone to a Bobby concert, okay, the Cardinal official was the worst concert I've ever seen full stop
the Bob Dylan concert was second worst for sure but I would see him again in a
heartbeat cards that exhaust anyway or peak to play
the read will you still do 14 damn no no that's cuz you're it's cuz you're
flicking me I'm literally gonna take 30 damage just to fuck you up man got
ornamental fan anyway. I'm literally going in July pull the fuck up. Yeti that's
literally awesome. You're kind of living my dream to be honest. I think we play
the cards now because this is the turn when you can play the cards without
suffering like his fucking curse.
This fella makes cards more expensive.
Literally missed the part where that's my fucking problem, to be honest with you.
Don't care.
What the fuck is that damage?
you literally exhaust anyway and the rest of these cards suck ass so of course
I'm gonna play him I shifted 40 fucking damage man we think this is a fucking
game
this one we can't draw literally do not even fucking care because we want
spectrum shift. Unfortunately, they're the only cable provider in my area.
Man.
Honestly, as crazy as it sounds, I feel like this 3 HP might make a difference.
Now this one you got to be very careful what you play.
Not really.
Dump it.
Smack him.
Smack him.
36 damage.
See now, now things are getting a little, a little sus.
Good time for a back flip.
time for a defend. Honestly, if I make beautiful time for an accuracy anyway, and then exhaust
this trash from my hand, and we get rainbow ring. Huge.
The OED damage. Kind of a horrible turn. Next turn we got lots of shivs maybe.
I feel like Dark Shackles will be more relevant later.
It'll be an interesting finish, that's for sure.
This is exhaust, okay.
You need to defend.
Full stop. You need to defend.
Dump blade of ink.
I can't afford to lose it. I can't afford to lose the bolus.
Now this is my exhaust turn.
Secret tech, wait secret technique goes crazy here.
I'm the one who lives, Skyler.
I feel like I basically have not hit you.
Um, it's a strength and a dex, right?
Let's send it, man.
Maybe, maybe there's something to it.
Alright, 33 damage.
This is where things get very interesting.
I don't give a fuck about bolus, man.
Although I might, you know what, Panache is not going to be the play for us.
It became another entropy, 16-7, so we're not taking damage.
You have to play, you can't draw this turn.
You have to play your defense, but you also definitely want to play Inky Shibs.
Now we're going to play Inky Shibs.
See how much damage they do.
you down to 24. Next turn we have we have really good defense. Spend two. Hit him with
one next or do you just yeah you definitely spend two because you don't
want to die. And then play if you have to play both next turn you have to play
play both. Insanely good turn for dork shackles. All we could do with finesses draw something
we don't want to not be able to play.
That's amazing.
We got to transform an entropy.
Became panache, which is zero cost.
We're definitely going to play a skill.
Or are we just going to go, oh, the skill is blade of ink.
And then an attack and an attack and an attack
I'm sorry, I'm sorry. I don't know what you want me to say
Okay, first we locked in on the fight, but also you can't be mad
We we mean that up and said see 15 cards from the regent and still easily did it man
We basically threw the second act
You can't be mad
The 6 HP literally mattered. I mean, honestly, you know, old people stay winning. That's all
I'm going to say. You got a college degree in Slay this by or two. Okay, congratulations.
I have 4,000 hours in it. I lose. I have such a capacity for losing, you wouldn't
even understand. You would have quit or put your credit card info in years ago, years ago.
Transform a strike and defend Loose 12 max HP. You may ignore PODs. You know what?
Neutron age is not costing much energy. Actually seems pretty good, but we'll see.
Not taking poultice handcuffs yourself? Okay, first off, I did take poultice. Secondly,
I don't know what poultice is. Tertiary, literally the only thing that matters as
As far as an opening item is, the only thing that fucking matters, and I do mean the only
thing that fucking matters, go ahead hit me for one, is whether or not you get silver
crucible.
And if you don't get silver crucible, then I mean that's life man, what do you want
me to say?
Ain't my fault.
Did he win? I had the poop. Nobody tell him.
Punish him for his unavoidable bodily functions.
Gather light might be like an always take man. Although to be honest an AOE card
of any sort on Act 1 also kinda goes crazy.
I wanna be able to play Plating next turn if I have to.
Did you have a good poop?
So I know like you're not talking to me but I've been having the best poops lately man.
Once I got back from vacation I got back on the Metamucil train slower than I should have
but now that I'm back on it, it's actually, I cannot stress for you enough.
Even if you didn't believe me about the Philips One Blade and you thought it was like
a ghost sponsorship or something like that.
the metamucil thing is not a bit.
And it doesn't have to be metamucil.
It could be any kind of fiber, I'm sure.
And maybe psyllium husk, but the metamucil
is readily available in all grocery stores and pharmacies.
It will save your life.
You name astral pulse and then buy a card
that generates stars for us.
What are the odds we wouldn't get a single card
that generates stars?
You gotta be fucking trolling me, bro.
Wait, we have another shop, though.
Fuck it, we ball.
If you combine metamucil and frozen fruit
and vanilla protein powder,
you make the best frozen creamsicle smoothie.
No disrespect.
You sound exactly like my mom.
In fact, I shouldn't even say no disrespect.
I should say respect.
You sound like one of the most important women in my life.
But that genuinely is kind of an insane sentence.
It's an unbelievably mom coded sentence.
I literally need stars.
I don't know who you want me to say.
Like I'm like Nemesis the way I need stars.
I can't take it, man.
I mean, radiate kind of worse.
we don't generate many stars.
35, 35, we might get a cheap star generator in here.
Fucking astral pulse, man.
Waste of my fucking time.
Actually, an insanely valuable card that I have played though.
Why don't we just eat dirt on turn one?
get you oh we fucking I could have killed one instead but I'll kill one now
go into a shop with 35 gold is worse than picking three regent cards on act
two okay but what if I got a half price glow what if it was that one time in
history that there was the exact card I needed was in the shop and half price
Do you ever think about that?
It could have happened, man.
Stranger things happen every day.
Stranger things ended, bro.
soon enough right or we've actually fucking with that show in which case I
apologize
one two three three so you would you're a one star cost card that does 12 damage I
I think we still skip it for now.
I need to generate more stars.
Man, this is fucking insane.
I'm going to upgrade Venerate.
Now, obviously, I have to find a way to ruin your life.
I think it's going to look like this.
This is the fuck-ass fish, I'm remembering now.
You slurping the metamucil drink? Don't call it a drink, okay.
Metamucil and lean are two different things.
B-tubers cover your ears.
I'm drinking, I'm putting the powder in the water and I'm going...
And I'm scowling like a bartender at a bar that sells mojitos when you order a mojito.
By the way, a new rage bait subreddit dropped that I did not know about, but my discord let
me know about it.
Are you guys familiar with r slash barista?
I don't want to put r slash barista two under the gun because what happened is that my
My chat was telling me, instead of ordering a shaken brown sugar ice espresso, shaken brown
ice sugar espresso, can I get a, y'all take a grande, I've lost the word order, I've lost
the word order, I've lost the word order.
A shaken, ice brown sugar oat?
An ice brown sugar oat shaken espresso?
Anyway, long story short, you can actually just
order a shakerado, which apparently will get you
that at any coffee shop.
It's not proprietary to the Starbucks Publicly
Traded Corporation on the New York Stock Exchange.
But then, I googled it, and there was an r slash barista
post that was like, is anyone else
getting sick of shakerados?
And it was like an essay.
I have to give some respect to the r slash barista crowd,
because literally every single comment in the thread
was like, if your cafe sells shakerados,
just make the drink and don't cry about it.
And I was like, damn, this is our baristas
are actually like holding the economy together
single-handedly.
The Reddit discourse used to be,
I fucking hate it when someone comes into my bar
the advertises that we make mojitos in orders of mojito or even worse customers
that were like I'm not like other customers I won't order a mojito at the
mojito bar I order a caperina instead which is just as much work but gives me
the moral high ground
Brother, I think you have to take a stab at Void Form.
Forge 15, huh?
Have they ever made like a worse potion than this?
No, wait.
Have they ever made a better potion than this?
I do, I have seen girl dinner diaries, but I'm living the most annoying life of all time
which is, I've become one of those people who believes that everything is fake online.
But the thing is, I actually believe that everything is fake online now.
The reason is that when I was like 21, I was like, man, people got a lot of crazy stories.
There's a lot of interesting people out there.
Now at age 37, I'm like, if your boyfriend was like, boyfriend of 11 years, found phone
number in jean pocket of boyfriend of 11 years you wouldn't be like i'm gonna go
on reddit and post a picture of pizza rolls you would be like like i'm gonna
be fucking depressed like i'm gonna i'm gonna go lay in bed and like watch some
shit you wouldn't be post i would like to maybe i'm wrong on this one i would like
to think you wouldn't be out there just like posting it for karma immediately
or something like that you would be beating his ass red with a frying pan
or something. I'd have to imagine.
Don't even get me started on this guy, man.
Must be done.
Honestly, man, could be the move.
We're gonna get him.
We're gonna get him.
ends your turn? Are you mad I didn't play like Radiate for Zero or whatever?
We're gonna make it man.
Okay, we literally are gonna make it and he's going to give us the best relic of
all time.
What would the best relic be I don't know just give it to me okay he literally did give
us the best relic of all time no combat please that's combat bro um
You're doing no damage.
I think we got to save a little bit of energy or a little bit of stars so that we can play
plating.
If we play plating, everything's fine.
This guy's a pain in the f**king head, though.
Well, like, this is literally better.
It's gonna be rough.
You're literally fine.
I mean, he's still like, it's kind of annoying me.
Like he's taken me very low on HP.
I think I have a reasonable case to be mad.
Love in the stubble, brother.
Thank you for saying that.
This is my new normal though.
It's shaving on Friday and not getting really,
not to be the most annoying person in the world,
but shaving on Friday and not getting another chance
to shave until the next Friday.
But it's okay. It's alright. It's not stubble though. I really don't like it.
I mean it looks okay on the camera. It doesn't feel good. I'm very much like,
I'm leaving the beaver coated with facial hair, man. I know exactly what I want to do on this turn, by the way.
It takes 30 seconds with the one blade.
I forget where I mentioned this, so I apologize if you're hearing this for the second time.
As I've gone gray, literally it makes my facial hair have the exact coarseness of steel
wall. So like the one blade it does what it can and I appreciate it for it. But like as
I try to like especially like the neck is okay, the cheeks are fine and the top of the head
and the sides of the head are okay. But the back of the head and right under the chin
and then like the corners where your jaw means the neck is really tough man
stop with this
this is huge
the chin especially man
24 damage
We're fucking dead man
Maybe because of that time where I had three energy left
Died by one, but that's okay. I'm win-lose win-lose win-lose. So we come back and we win
Doesn't it come with a special blade that cuts stubble are you a real shaver? This is another thing I have to point out a
A lot of you are out there thinking you know shit about shaving, but you're not shaving
with the same constraints that some of us are shaving with.
I have steel spikes coming out of my face.
If you have three wispy little hairs and you're like, my blade cuts it just fine, yeah bro,
I'm happy for you.
We're not supposed to be having the same conversation, man.
Are you gatekeeping shaving hair, buddy?
If I didn't have mail presenting nipples, I would pull the shirt up right now.
But because I do, I would get banned.
You don't know what the fuck you're...
I got a sleeper build when it comes to hair.
Let's put it that way.
The visible area?
Not that much hair.
The not visible area?
There's a reason we got two Dyson's.
Let's just put it that way.
They will never give you...
Actually, this isn't that bad.
We'll take greed.
I don't like seeing a shop that's four nodes away but that's okay.
Cracked out uncle if you know what I mean.
Public enemy number one.
Understand?
AC DC.
Didn't you get it lasered?
See this is how I know you're not real hair havers.
My grass stuff back me up here.
The laser, you have to get it done multiple times.
I still need to book the second appointment.
But I mean, the problem is to book the second appointment
I have to shave my back.
And last time shaving my back was fucking annoying, man.
First appointment was months ago.
I mean, I'm not trying to be annoying,
but I genuinely had been like busy
and my life has been fucked up.
Like it's, it's, Q1, Q2 has been a very interesting start
to the, to the year so far.
Also, what's taking me out is you don't understand.
You're saying too busy to get your hair lasered off.
I don't I don't get it you're doing the thing if I got my hair lasered off
You would be using that as an excuse for why I'm not busy
You would be like oh you're busy and yet you had time to go get your back hair lasered off see you've got it fucking reversed man
Correct, okay, so I've sussed you out. I proved myself your intellectual superior now bow down
watch Montreal versus Tampa I wish man I checked the score in the morning and I
said yay what is steady card gains retain wait okay 99 gold for two cards to have
retain seems awesome. Now if snake bite is good because of retain what would we want to have
retain? Probably this either venerate no probably things that cost stars so we can play them when
we have the stars. Full stop. So that we don't dead draw them when we're starless.
It's a chosen sheath situation any day of the week. I'll add a clumsy for a relic.
The relic was wet stone, but that's no whole scheme of things. That ain't that bad.
cut the curse we I don't think we want Juzu bracelet with with chosen cheese we
actually want to do combat at least well it was pretty good but man I I'm a black
hole guy man I mean Astral pulse is really good too black hole black hole
is so important. I love whole two, brother. No, you don't. You love the idea of it. I'm
marching to beat my own drum on this one. I do want an astral pulse, but we need more
stars before we add it to the deck. Now add it and get the stars later.
Then go straight into venerate again. We're gonna need it. Holy fuck we get
there. Holy fuck we don't get there. That stings. Friendly reminder to complete your
census. Yeah thank you Stats Canada. Thank you for saying that. I was kind of
stunned I've become that age where I saw the ad on TV about the census and I went
that can't be it can't be time for the census I just filled one out oh shit five
fucking years ago my bad y'all it's true I will say you work for stats Canada I
I think Stats Canada is cool.
I love going to the Wikipedia page four in neighborhood
and finding out what percentage of it is Catholic.
That I think that's really interesting information.
And then nodding my head and going,
yeah, yeah, that seems about right.
That's about what I expected.
But you guys are really nosy.
You're asking a lot of questions that are like,
cut right up in your business, man.
I could have told you that for real dude, maybe or whatever.
Nine damage.
I need to, even doing nine damage doesn't let me kill you a turn faster but I'm thinking
very long term on this one.
You have to be weakened.
going to take two turns which is pissing me off. This does enough damage to get, oh it's
going to fuck you the fuck up next turn motherfucker. Star potion. Regal pillow might be exactly what
we need man and then finally a star generator. I'm honestly, I'm not going to do question
I'm going to believe in the chosen cheese.
Reddit ass.
Relic, but you know what? Burning blood clears, man.
I need some damn blocks.
Let's turn game energy and star retain your hand and start.
I'll give it a try.
I believe.
You killed, is this the one you killed first?
I feel like it's four, one, three, two, oh, brother.
Okay, I mean it still went pretty well.
What's next on the watch list?
Great question.
The answer is I don't even know until I get on the bike to be honest.
This morning I watched Golden Balls.
I needed something a little bit more, a little bit less Kino.
I watched too much peek in a row.
I could feel myself being like,
like I'm kind of peeked out.
Like I got to the top of the mountain
and I'm like, it's like if you got to the top of Everest,
you would look at K2 and be like, that's not even that tall.
So I had to walk it back a little bit.
You retain?
Who might as well play it anyway?
Um, I watched something a little weightless.
I'm sorry like I wish I could I'm not gonna spend four bike rides to watch
castration movie that's one that's gonna have to wait until I find myself with
like a five-hour window it's just I four bike rides for one movie is really
tough to undrive my car I could I could do drive my car on a 180 but it's
It's just, here's why, instead of pitting two bad bitches against each other, why don't
we just all take the opportunity to dunk on television instead?
And I'm going to get a lot of minus twos here, but I'm right, so I don't care.
Do we have to use a potion here?
No, we don't.
The pit is good, full stop, but it's really tough to justify watching a whole season
of the pit, when one season of the pit is like 600 minutes, which could easily be at
a minimum five movies, five different movies from different directors from different perspectives
from different genres, etc, etc.
It's a one day binge.
Oh mother fucker, 10 hours of television is not a one-hour binge, or a one-day binge.
Let's not be glib.
That's obviously insane.
Wait, are we gonna smith, or are we gonna...
Go ahead, be mad.
We rest because this guy, uh, he has a dead man switch on him.
this play a next turn for the weakness. We play the falling star and then we bring it
on back. There are really more than anything else. We need to beat that ass. We'll beat
Get the ass fessly.
You'd really fuck with yee-ee.
I've seen the haircut in Grand Theft Auto, I don't know.
Give me a city of stars, man.
First I've ever heard of it.
I've never heard of this movie, yee-ee.
Does it have anyone from Twin Peaks in it?
No, that makes sense. I guess. Well, no, I wouldn't surprise me
Kind of getting up in that ass man
Definitely a falling star plus I would like a meteor strike, please
I would like a meteor strike on Act 2.
Look at me talking like Act 1's already in the books.
Kinda is.
Niceest thing anyone's ever said to me in this fucked up world, man.
Also an X-star is payoff card would be kind of awesome.
Bring back a good block which we do not have.
Just remember I need to finish watching Rental Family.
Legitimately good movie that I wanted to hate because I think it would be cool to hate
it but I couldn't hate it.
I found it, I found it very charming.
Never you attack an enemy loses one strength this term,
but very tough to play, 18 damage.
Did you already discuss the Kanye asshole picture?
That could describe so many things.
That could describe so many different,
it could be a picture of a person,
it could be a picture of a body part.
It's literal.
Hmm.
Like I'm guessing his butt didn't take the picture.
10 block, this is on top of your draw pile, play it.
I mean, none of these cards do what I want them to do,
but 10 block for one I can live with.
At the start of each combat, gain six stars.
Yeah, man.
Yeah, I can live with that.
And then, seven block and a colorless, I'd rather get the bulwark for free.
They don't have a cow, we have a bulwark.
How do you know what cadence and resistance to use if you're not doing a class?
It's simple.
If there's other Pelotoners, you just go a little bit faster and a little bit harder
than them.
That's all you need to know.
Hey, Ryan, in Overkill by Men at Work, is he thinking about the implications of not
being able to sleep?
Or is he, which is causing him further unrest, or is he thinking of the implications of
something unrelated that causes him to be unable to get to sleep?
i think uh... overkill is a song about
the it's a double-edged
spear of uh... anxiety
i think it's about like he's he's saying he knows everything's going to be okay
but he can't stop worrying regardless which is actually making his life
worse
actually manifesting the very thing that he was worrying about an attempt to
avoid
so i i think he can't get to sleep because he thinks about the
implications
of what if everything that could go wrong does and it goes bad as wrong as
possible
uh... which is actually leading him to have a lower quality of life as a result
in the in a bit of an ironic self-fulfilling prophecy so to speak
check this out
i am invincible on top of the drop pile
ten block for free on a turn where i didn't need any block
Yeah, yeah, I'm thinking it's peak.
I think we got enough stars to play a game of blast.
Literally, you don't need cosmic indifference.
there you go
the spell is gonna piss me off though
analyze the lyrics to closing time next
I saw that clip from Fleet Swear
that
that Jen X couple who makes uh...
I don't even know what to describe it they make
parodies of popular songs but all the parodies are about being middle-aged
it's all about like
instead of cleaning up my closet by m&m it's always like i'm taking out the
garbage and they hold like a garbage bag like right into the the center of
the frame
and they do a podcast in the the the crux of the year as the holderness is
thank you
and uh... the crux of the podcast gimmick was like we actually listen to
the lyrics of uh...
songs that we were singing in the 90s, and they played
Semi-Charmed Life by Third Eye Blind,
and they go,
Do it, Crystal Meth,
and lift you up until you break it.
Don't stop.
And they go,
What?
Is this song about Crystal Meth?
Yeah, bro.
He says the words,
Do it, Crystal Meth,
and lift you up until you break.
It came up 30 years ago.
We can,
How long are we gonna do this bit, man?
I'm not saying you should have figured it out the first time you heard the song because
the first time you're just going doot doot doot doot doot doot and then like every other
time you're going doot doot doot doot doot doot doot doot.
But like, can we not be pretending that at like age 48 you're like shocked by the revelation
that the song's about crystal meth when the dude says it's about crystal meth?
who is watching this man? And also it's not about crystal meth, it's about having sex on
crystal meth. So people think it's like a song that's like oh isn't it kind of surprising
that this like poppy song is actually kind of dark? No it's not bro. I'm pretty sure
the song's about how fucking on crystal meth feels good. I've never done it, I've
never done crystal meth but it seems like for the most part he's having a
pretty good time until he breaks at least
the Thens are good for us cut a strike do we play a power do we have it we have
one power I think permafrost kind of underrated man maybe I'm a freak though
I want to try guessing the song, but I'm scared to be wrong.
It's, I mean, it's not your fault. It's a millennial classic.
Third Eye Blind's Semi-Chunk Kind of Life.
Baby, baby, I should have played my defense
instead of generating ten stars, baby.
Well, this is fucked up.
In my head, I was literally like, maybe we need more stars, bro, you have 10 stars.
need to pay the iron price. Iron price paid. Next you're gonna pay the iron price. Except
you're you're gonna pay the iron price because I'm gonna use a potion to kill
you. Anyway yeah sorry if I ruined your childhood. I'm pretty sure that song's
about crystal meth source I made it up there's a lot of stuff I see on fleets
where I'm like who's watching this and then it turns out some of them the
answer is like eight people and I'm like that checks out but then sometimes
it's like tens or hundreds of thousands of people and I'm like oh my god I had
no idea
Iron's literally like a hundred bucks a ton.
That can't be true.
Chat...
Chat, back me up here.
Iron must be more expensive than that.
That seems way too cheap.
It's like five percent of the crust?
Yeah, it's rare. It should be expensive
That's not what we're saying
Reflect could could hit for us here. They get you on the shipping. Don't even get me started man. I
Know the terrace fucked up on that
still need better blocks for such a thin deck my blocks are not all that
what the fuck it genuinely is a hundred dollars a ton guys we should make a run
on the iron market. Also, I'm sorry. There's some shit you read on the internet where I'm
like, I don't buy it. You ever see that post that's like if you took all the gold that's
ever been mined in human history, it's still like it's the size of one of the pyramids
in Egypt. I'm sorry, this is not true. The pyramids are big, but like they're not, they're
not as big as all the gold that's ever been mined. All the gold that's ever been mined
is definitely way bigger than that. 100%. I did the math. Listen, okay, don't be naive.
It just doesn't pass the smell test is what I'm trying to say.
Six maybe seven pyramids.
See now you're talking.
How is it possible that this is the worst draw that's ever existed in human history?
Your nostrils are broken?
Nostrils are fine bro.
never been better honestly nostrils never been better you think all the
shits you've taken in your life would fill a van I'm gonna be honest with you I
think all the shits that I've taken in my life might be bigger than one pyramid
I'm and I'm like running the numbers in my head right now to see if that's
possible I just feel like I've been alive for what like like 15,000 days or
something like that would not surprise me if I have shit enough to fill one of the
great pyramids of Giza. Literally no chance. How big is how big is the great
pyramid of Giza? It's what like 200 feet tall. It's about as tall as Guardians
of the Galaxy cosmic breakout.
Bigger? No, I couldn't have built it back then.
Won't be naive.
For some reason I thought we drew cards with that.
Um, because I can't read.
How about this, then this?
And then we just kill you and not worry about it all that much.
Okay, this is actually awesome.
Wait, but Resonance could go insane for us.
Royal gamble reminds me of the Royal scam.
You would need 320 pounds of poop per year.
I'm being so real right now.
If you ask me how much the average person pooped per day,
I would say one pound.
Is that crazy?
Is that like 10 times more than the average person poops?
I feel like a pound of shit a day makes a lot of sense
I've done two pound poops weighing myself after yeah, well, it's not apples to apples though because
like
You sweat a lot when you poop too. You lose a lot of you lose a lot of water out of your pores
125 grams to 500 grams a day bro 500 grams is over a pound
I was in the right ballpark. I was in the ballpark at least and everyone else is just saying go to a doctor
Go to a doctor what the doctor that's gonna tell me oh you're actually completely right about this
Yeah, I'll go to the doctor
Yeah, but every day I feel like a pound of shit is like not that much
The real answer is it depends. Oh, shut up. It depends. Oh, there's no- nothing has nuance, bro. There's a right way and a wrong way.
Nothing's conditional. Everything's immutable.
The start of your turn, deal damage equal to the turn number to all enemies.
Whenever you add a copy of a card to a deck add one additional card whenever you play an attack gain a block whatever man
We love we love silent cards folks
We love silent cards
Escape plan is a very good card
I feel like after image is not going to be that crazy, but we already have good AOE.
Give me an after image.
And then I think you skip this one black hole venerate goes and say we oh this is one of
those turns where you just play every card of course. Why do you keep getting cards
for other characters? I'd say because I'm the absolute governor. Come off it. I
I said what I said? I said what I said? I might say it again.
You're freaking out. You're acting like I said I'm rectangular or something like that.
Ah man. I got holes.
What do I want on top? What do I want to draw next turn?
Astral pulse is what I want to draw next turn.
This is exactly what I wanted to draw.
And then a Potion.
Good done, lad.
25 card deck.
I'm okay.
What's with the question marks kid?
Literally I'm not even gonna hit you.
Wait have I played?
No, I'm not, I'm literally not even gonna hit you.
I'm not gonna fill my deck with trash.
Temple of the Dog is a good band.
Check get him.
I'm going to freeze you right there and hold the guiding stuff.
One album, Andes?
I mean, I feel like that's being generous.
I feel like I want to call them one song Andes.
And I also am not 100% sure that the song is even good.
I think the song might be comical.
Damn, dude.
You don't like, you don't like going hungry or hungry or hunger strike?
I like it as a time capsule of that time period.
In a manner of speaking.
I don't consider it a sacred cow of like the classic rock genre or whatever.
It isn't classic rock.
All right grandpa, let's get you back to bed
Eight curses we can do better double it
We have a lot of cards that cost stars now one two three
four five six
You do 18 damage for 1 star.
And actually you do a little bit more now that I think about it because you also do 3 extra
damage by a black hole.
Horrible draw.
Embarrassing draw.
You are going to make me take 6 damage at the end of my turn.
I can live with that.
W escape plan.
Respect grunge.
I respect grunge, man.
I was at a birthday party for my daughter's friends.
Information that you're going to require for this story.
My daughter is five.
So her friends are having their sixth birthday party.
One of the kids was wearing a Nirvana shirt.
You know what? I looked at that and I said, respect. She loves good music.
I would love to retain my hand, man, and then play a reflect later.
I know some of you would have been crashing out. You would have been walking up to her going,
oh yeah, what's better? Was better Nirvana unplugged or in utero?
Okay, name the member of Nirvana that's not Kurt Cobain or Dave Grohl.
Yeah, you don't know Kurt Novichak or whatever his name is.
I don't know him either, but I'm wearing the Triforce shirt.
I'm not the one wearing the smiley face shirt.
7 damage. You're my shining star no matter where you are. That straw man exists. They always
do. They always do. Say hello to heaven, buddy. W? No, not W. Never mind. Huge play.
You know what, people never say anymore.
And it's sad.
People never say genius pewed strikes again.
Society's really lost its way.
Nobody ever said that?
I can think of one fellow who said it.
Did anyone ever say that?
Yes, bro.
Obviously.
obviously yeah mouth man we got to go one less energy though it flicks me it
flicks me a touch to say
We may just fucking die.
We want to draw.
We listen, okay?
22.
How much damage?
I'm taking 13.
I literally live.
I'm taking 13 damage.
We go to 9.
We take 2 damage.
We stay on 7.
You have 2 turns of vulnerability.
I hit you for 13.
I literally kill you next turn.
We also didn't take...
I didn't take afterimage into account.
lived. We? We? Dying Star! 999 gold with a very close shop. If I may, I love fur coat, man.
having that like you it in a lot of circumstances you can get through the
final floor fighting like one enemy and the boss the boss being the door maker
the easiest boss in the game now I'm taking 999 gold because the shops one
away it's that simple
that's beautiful
When the cheese is chosen
It's a little less beautiful
We definitely don't need that back there now that I think about it but
When was the last time you said, isn't that right, Zach?
Well, I didn't know.
Nobody told me that Social Media superstar Orahack watches the Dulls.
I have to find out second hand through, of all places, my discord.
I have to find out through my discord that Orahack is a Dulls viewer when they posted
an edit of me as Ned Flanders talking about fantasy football, of all garish pursuits.
So, I would say the last time was on Monday when I was talking about fantasy football and
about how my quarterback room last year was so decroded because I had belief in Anthony
Richardson and Shadr Sanders and it probably cost me the whole fucking league.
That was probably the last time.
Well, the most recent time, certainly not going to be the last time.
Let's not go crazy.
It became a past time.
From James Reynolds, even better.
Dear sir, you made the wrong sucker a cuckold, it's time to pay the piper for the pants you
unbuckled and you can keep seeing my wife if the price is right or I'm telling your
wife.
You know what I'm talking about?
As Hamilton, bro.
Context request, that's Hamilton.
Yeah, Eslin Manuel Miranda.
three songs in Hamilton. I mean I'd say non-stop, the final song from Act One for sure. I'm a
big fan of the Skyler Sisters to be honest. I think it's just a great song.
Maybe helpless? It's a little normie coated but I'm satisfied it's good too but
I'm gonna go non-stop helpless the Skyler Sisters right there.
Where's the next shot, man?
It doesn't exist.
Okay.
I'm not paying 200 gold to cut a strike.
I'm not paying 200 gold to make my deck like 3.8% smaller.
have to be an idiot but I will take a comment. Skyler sisters shake it. So true. Fuck it,
I'll lose the Astral Pulse. So fine. He shouldn't have said so young, so young. Tell me I'm
and what's crazy is that Eliza I'm not sure you were the only one I'm not I'm
not sure Eliza if you've seen the play I've got some horrible news Eliza I've
got some terrible news for you
You know what I'm talking about?
Where's my Stinger bit?
Yeah, kind of.
Fuck it bro.
There comes a point you want to keep your deck small.
If your deck gets too big, literally you just want to make it bigger.
You pass a point of no return where it makes more sense to just make the deck get even
bigger.
It depends.
Nah, you're thinking of old folks pissing.
What am I going to do?
I'm going to gain a bunch of stars, I'm going to retain my whole hands.
I'm definitely going to reflect a little bit of damage back at the attacker, man.
And then ruin your life.
Keep the star economy flowing.
This is the worst turn I've seen in my entire life.
This is this is a comically evil turn that they've done here.
This one's also really bad.
Where's my rare that plays itself?
It was there!
I didn't look!
I didn't look closely enough!
No, nevertheless, we're balling somehow.
Literally better for us to reflect than to play Dying Star, even if it is ethereal.
Yeah, this one might be over, man.
Huge.
This is a regular enemy?
Motherfucker.
I've done 40 damage to this guy.
I'm sorry, that can't be true.
Save the reflect for the next turn, when everyone starts to hit.
Diamond, invincible.
I think it's gonna be like reflect.
We're already in an awesome spot.
Just cosmic indifference reflect back for the next turn.
Ruined your life.
That was a crazy turn.
I'm once again asking if you've had the Szechuan ketchup packets.
A lesser streamer would go straight for the Rick and Morty Juggler vein on that one.
Okay? Just so you know.
But can I say something? I'm gonna say the whitest shit I've ever said in my entire life.
And I did every single stream this week, I've said I actually think the Karen haircut looks pretty good.
So this is really saying something.
Nah, I'm gonna be okay here.
Um...
Marks.
I think that I am allergic to Szechuan pepper as crazy as it sounds inconceivable.
But I actually I firmly believe it because every single time I have it and I love the flavor of
it I really do. I love the flavor of it. It gives me dry lips for a week. I don't know
know what it is about like I even so like I went to Heidi Lau I ate the Malatang
it fucked up my lips for like almost a month and I was like maybe I just got
sick around the same time that I had the Malatang and then I went to Bigway the
hot pot place like a month and a half later and I ate it and it fucked up
the same spot on my lips again for like a week this one's gonna you're gonna
find this insane I went to Earl's if you're not familiar with Earl's it's
It's like a gastropub, chain, essentially, it's basically like button-up shirt McDonald's,
right?
And I got a Szechuan pepper noodle, like Kung Pao noodle bowl, and it gave me the same
thing, man.
I think I'm literally, like, I'm starting to think I might not be Chinese, I guess
is the end game, which obviously is pissing me to fuck off, but it's always the
same spot too. Eventually you could be immune? That's a good point. Eventually, I just tough
it out long enough. Eventually I might be immune, but we were rooting for you? People
are genuinely like you to come on man, don't say that. Don't let your whiteness stop you
from being Chinese. I don't know. Well, one thing's for sure, more research is required.
And fuck it, I might just keep eating it anyway. I don't know. Take the peptides? I don't think
And that's gonna happen.
I don't even know what a peptide is to be honest with you.
I mean, I know it's, I mean, it's related to protein.
That's guaranteed.
I have a peptide guy in kits.
I believe that a hundred percent.
Also, that's not anti-Kitsilano posting.
I love Kitsilano.
But if you were to tell me,
if you were to say, if the question on Family Feud
was top four answers on the board,
name of Vancouver neighborhood
where you could have a peptide guy.
Kids would be number one and I ran through, I ran through them in my head.
I genuinely think Kizilano would be number one.
North Band would be number two and I was like commercial Broadway but I was like not
on a no.
Like Granby Woodland, not on a no.
People aren't doing peptides out there, they're doing other stuff.
I could see this doing something for us.
Okay, also Yaltown, yes.
I could see having a peptide guy in Yaltown.
Give me 11 HP for a relic, man.
Anchor, why not?
What the fuck?
10 nib bag of marbles.
Now, do you upgrade one card?
Yes, you upgrade one card that's worth more than 12 HP.
What about the talent with all the shit on the ground?
Isn't that a Nicki Minaj lyric?
You're like slicker than the guy with the thing on his eye.
Some shit like that.
How'd you know that?
Super bass was Pitchfork's number one song of 2011.
Well, this is obviously the worst time of all time.
Can't draw.
That's okay.
Black hole is core.
Generate is necessary, reflect is pretty good.
Playing cards makes other cards more expensive.
Definitely want stars.
do allow you to play something that generates weakness. I think that's important.
Whenever you play an attack or skill, it's exhausted. Okay, that's good because our deck
is too thick anyway. Go ahead, exhaust the cards. If I had good cards in my deck, I'd
be playing on them. I fucked up. Or did I? Maybe I did. I'm literally just playing all
of my cards. So I'm going to go non-verbal on this fight, as I often do. Great. I'm going
Great pen nib, holy cow.
Ever been to Furry Creek north of Vancouver? Yes, twice last year.
You've been to El Stadio, Federico?
Yes, I'm... you know what? Let me retain my hand, bro.
I always laugh when I'm enroute to Squamish and drive past Furry Creek.
It's bad. The exhaust on that is nasty. Don't get me wrong.
Play some basic defense. You know what? We need the stars from Venerate.
Cosmic indifference. And then bring back what do we want next
turn? Maybe just something as simple as a gather light.
a reliable star regenerator, man.
We only have 10 cards in our deck.
We have almost nothing to generate stars.
Which is not good.
We have to be very precious about the star generating cards,
or the star costing cards we do play.
Like it's kind of a gimme that you definitely want to block and reflect
And I'm gonna say you don't play that because we need to keep our stars around then
Now whatever you play here gets exhausted we have to kill you within like one cycle anyway
So I think we definitely are okay playing a reflect I don't know it might be impossible
for us to win at this point because I have no way to generate another star and then play
my cards which means I can't play my cards which means I die this is why you
want a lot of cards during door maker yeah unfortunately I don't know if you
know this you only know what the third boss is when you get to the third floor
so it's kind of hard to plan for it before you before you get there how
How many cards did you take in Act 3?
I think I took a few.
Okay, we pays the regent again, man.
But the other heuristic is that you always fight him anyway, so you should just know.
I'm defaulting to the principle of it can't be that bad or it wouldn't be in the game.
If this card sucked as bad as it looks like it sucked, it would be better.
I think it can be that bad.
Forgot the second forge doesn't put it in our hand.
I mean you need this.
But like a hundred percent I think I'm just going to build around the sword even if it
does suck. Forge is a shitload of fuck. That's some of the realest shit anybody's ever said.
You know, taking zero damage kind of peak. Is that even good? Like, I guess it's good
that I can kill you next turn. Are you still having problems with your foreskin? Cameron,
I was never having any problems with my foreskin. I don't know where you got that idea. You
know what, keenly kicking a bunch of draw could work. I've never, I mean, yes, I'm
circumcised, but I've never had any other problems with my foreskin. Keep the deck
Thin as fuck.
Chant the card with slither. Choose a card to transform into
Toric Toughness.
What is this Toric Toughness upgrade to cost one?
No seven and seven. Okay, it's the damn
Slither kingly kick them.
It's literally good.
I choose not to respect it in spite of itself.
Where do you think your foreskin is?
I can literally see it.
They like not to ruin your life or anything,
but they peel it back, right?
They staple it to the shaft itself.
So I can, if anything, I just don't know what
the outside of it looks like.
I know what the inside of it looks like as I see it every day.
They cut it off.
I don't think they cut it off.
I think they put a slit in it and fold it down.
I think they cut a slit in it and fold it down.
They deaf cut it off.
I don't know what you got.
not circumcised. Maybe wouldn't this be crazy if I just found out that I was not circumcised
after all this time? I don't think mine's gone. I think they just like, they made it
do something else. They put it in a different spot. That's for sure. I mean it's not like,
I don't want to say normal and give anybody like a complex or whatever, but it's not it's not default. Let's put it that way
I'm not running the Jonesy skin
How bad do we want it upgrade I think we want it bad
Jonesy's definitely uncut.
That's what I'm saying.
I don't have the Jonesy.
The scythe permanently increases damage by four.
Bro, next time we get it, it's going to be so good.
Wait, supermassive actually might do something for us here?
Transform is in create?
You'd be surprised, brother.
You'd be surprised.
Wait, what's your name by the way?
Because you said it so glibly, transform is in create.
Well 52 month subscriber four-year badge
Wait this is crazy
You never watch the YouTube poop I watched the GI Joe YouTube poops from way back in the day
I'm going to dump this then.
I do think a gather light is pretty good.
I'm in the chatter.
Well you should add them then.
That's why the add function exists.
So you can add them.
them. Can I say something by the way? You guys have to get, I got in, but not in
trouble, but I got owned in the marketplace of ideas because I didn't
know someone's gender in the discord. So I said to them and they said just, I'm
actually he. I was trying my best, okay? I'm trying, how am I supposed to know just
from username and profile pictures? So I'm trying to be safe and by being
safe you're now, you're trying to gas like me into thinking I'm a bad
individual. He was just informing you. Oh, go ahead and take his side. I literally did nothing wrong.
Dump venerate. We don't need to see it. And they indicted me.
What's your excuse for me?
I don't think you're putting evil on me that I don't believe I deserve.
I don't believe I've ever done that.
Quick, everyone, just so we can get in front of this, everyone drop your preferred pronouns
in chat right now.
I will remember every single one of them.
Every single person in chat drop your preferred pronouns and I will associate them forever
with your identity okay okay I got him you had your chance never don't ever
get mad at me you've had your you had your chance refer to this clip you had
your chance all the everybody else you're you're good I got you this could
be all right. Kingly kick for two. That Kingly kick for two is still pretty peak now. Minion
die bomb. You're in a lot of trouble. Ceremonial beast but the ceremony is a fucking funeral.
RL Stein called, he said, eat shit and die.
Okay, Big Bang is the greatest card that's ever been invented.
form though? Yeah big bang though. Big bang though. Lord Lord Lord Lord. Tezcatara's
Ember. Do we give a fuck about Tezcatara's Ember? I don't think we
fucking do man. You know what I think we give a fuck about playing really fast
and removing more cards even though they're gonna give me soot. This will
make our deck thin as fuck. That's allowing us to reliably draw our best
cards. So I don't think I can do an Oasty attack. I would really like to.
would really really like to, but you cannot, that was stating news.
order, obviously. It's simple, draw a falling star and big bang. Actually still pretty good.
What do you mean I have no ability to kill you?
What do you mean I'm taking seven damage for no reason?
This deck sucks. It's actually incredible.
We don't add any more garbage. We don't need another kingly kick.
If anything, we remove more garbage.
Or do we upgrade two skills?
I think we upgrade two skills, man. That's a fucking dream for a guy like me.
hidden gem I ain't the one baby it's got to be rocket it's got to be wound rocket
or vulnerable rocket punch kingly kick I think his deck is actually awesome
I skip it.
What movie should I watch today?
Mmm, for an individual like you?
Probably the Jake Gyllenhaal, Conor McGregor, Roadhouse remake from a couple years ago.
I think you would really vibe with it.
Fuck you.
Fuck you!
Well, I heard it was good, man.
My friend from college told me it was good.
He told me it was just like a good time.
Can I get three or more cards in my exhaust pile?
I don't believe... I can do 63 damage for free!
This is better than 15 damage for free.
Nah, man, no it ain't.
Random doll?
Deal damage equal to the turn number to all enemies?
Bro, that's one damage to every enemy.
That's huge.
That's actually fucking enormous.
And then, draw it.
He didn't draw it. Splash me.
Poor damage, too vulnerable.
None block is really- you know what?
None or we draw.
Because we're gonna draw a minion strike.
Oh my god, we didn't draw a minion strike.
Oh my god, oh my god, oh my god, oh my god, oh my god, oh my god.
Okay, we can- we can use it so you do zero damage.
I'm actually gonna cry where the fuck are my my minion strikes bro there they
are
damn
need to hit you one time surely surely we draw an attack we'll make our own
King's Courage, Forge 15. A dead-ass snooze on that.
Draw three cards. Nice Rage Bait. It's not Rage Bait. And we're literally, I don't know if we're going to win because we might go against the doormaker, but we're going to, we're going to beat this floor.
It's literally not a better rock by the way because the rock cost is zero to play
You're who's rage baiting now?
Hey, are we 12 damage twice pretty fucking good
We did our glass actually work
Oh, the kingly kick.
Yes!
Oh, you have one orb slot!
You're right!
Charge.
No, we definitely want to keep super massive around.
I don't mind this.
spend the stock. You're dead. And did I know that you were gonna die? I had no
idea, to be honest with you. I skipped. Keep the deck super thin.
Hundred gold for a common relic? Sure, man. Ain't nothing common about Regal Pillow.
Grand finale. I don't think we're gonna get there.
Barry's pretty good though. Barry on vulnerability, pretty solid.
94 damage for one mana. Was that wrong? George Costanza voice? Was that wrong?
I don't know what the fuck else to get rid of, man.
Unupgraded gather light?
It's literally strictly better than a defend, but whatever.
He was in the pool.
At this point, I don't want to make it seem like Seinfeld is a little outdated, but at
At this point, everyone's familiar with shrinkage, right?
You gotta know about shrinkage.
But the other thing you need to know is that even if there wasn't shrinkage, you can't judge
a man based on the size of his penis in the pool anyway.
You may not be completely familiar with the grower versus shower dynamic.
there's showers and growers. And I, to be honest with you, I'm a man and I've been a man my whole
life. I'm not 100% sure that there are men out there who are showers. Now I do believe that
there are men who are closer to their purgated size when flaccid than other men. But I don't
I don't believe there are many men who are bigger flaccid than heart.
That doesn't make sense.
How would it becoming suffused with fluid make it smaller?
Thank you.
It breaks the laws of physics.
It doesn't make any sense.
trade-off longness with girth. Can I say something? I think that's cope. I think my deck is good
enough, man. Give me retain. I think that's cope. I think there's people out there who
have a long fat one. They're in our chat. They literally are six for one, 120 pounds,
and for some reason they always have like black nail polish on. I don't know, I don't know
the science behind it. Because obviously it's not causative, because then I'd be putting
the nail polish on but I don't know it's just at some point you just have to
speak from what you've seen
and ball don't lie man
You gotta go, you gotta go.
All part number, how many dicks have you seen?
I have no idea.
It's not enough to fill a pyramid, that's for sure.
save our stars to use on falling star every single time. Not not enough to fill a pyramid.
Okay an additional time for every time you've lost combat,
every time you've lost HP this combat will at some point be good for us.
Well said. I need a glass of water stat, man. It's gotta be authority manifest. Equilibrium?
would be nice to be nice to play it
you're my falling star
no matter where you are
actually entropy could go crazy for us now
I see a world where entropy makes sense.
We get rid of shit with that.
Boom.
Mother fucker.
They thought of everything.
20 damage?
Nah, I'd win.
It's six times!
We're literally awesome at this game, which is kind of crazy.
So obviously what you have to play is Bundle of Joy.
Even though I think that Bundle of Joy might be like one of the worst rares in the game,
But I also don't know what I'm talking about.
You may cook at rest sites.
The problem is I've already removed so many cards, man.
Like, I mean, at this stage, what am I going to remove?
I think I'll just take my block.
And then take a path where you never have to fight an elite.
It's Psy every time.
Me when they're asking me who should win best music video at the 2012 MTV Video Music Awards.
It's crazy that you're plus twoing that.
You guys are all traders.
That's when Carly Rae Jepsen dropped, call me maybe.
That's when Carly Rae Jepsen dropped call me maybe.
You guys are heretics.
I got your ass, bro.
Fuck it, plate me.
Why can't I, oh right, because I haven't transformed any cards yet.
Well that card obviously sucks.
is her nickname? Motherfucker. You said best music video? You think the Gangnam style music
video is better than Call Me Maybe? You might have a point. I had plating. I definitely
should have played the attack that did like happy HP. Not bad y'all. I do have
three or more cards in my exhaust pile. Bad news for you buddy. It had the biggest
plot twist in music history. Really? I was gonna discard this so I got another
one smart idea I'm still trying to puzzle out the metaphysical ramifications of
call me maybe like what do you mean before you came into my life I missed
you so bad like it just doesn't even doesn't even make sense how can is this
like a is it like a primary thing that's like a time travel set up I mean I
don't I don't know I just kind of to me it's like I don't like movies with
plot holes songs I'm still trying to figure it out
I thought you were a uriner.
I only gave, um, I only gave in the mood for love a four and a half, which for a lot of
people might as well be a zero.
So I don't know, the jury's still out to be honest.
Oh my God, it's not the door maker, bro.
Fuck it, I'll drink to that.
Whenever you play an attack, add a random attack into your hand, that does seem like
it would be awesome with like whatever that card is that does more damage, the more cards
you've created, but it's gonna have to be 20 damage for a guy like me. How about manifesting
my authority? I'll level with you. We could kill you this term, but you're not doing shit
Anyway, let's get rid of some shit we don't care about and kill you next turn instead.
I looked it up, the plot twist is crazy.
Now I gotta know, man.
I gotta know what this supposed plot twist is.
Because for me, the number one plot twist in pop music is Skater Boy, which if you haven't
listened to Skater Boy in a while, you might not realize that she's meeting him after the
show.
She'll be at the studio singing the song he wrote about how your pretty face didn't
see what he's worth or whatever like it's it's been a minute I don't listen to
songs by clones listen she might be from Greater Napa Niva she's not a clone
okay or maybe she is I don't know about all that I haven't seen the video
essays on that that is zero cost copy of this in your discard pile did you go
to school with her? No man, I wish I went to NDSS. Are you trolling me? It would have
been my damn dream to go to NDSS, man.
Not.
Maybe the remnant is actually good.
They're not, but that's okay.
It might be, they might be good.
Nobody cares, they're just talking about some stupid movie.
Remnant kind of ass but the regen is cool.
I think I get the revenant, remnant, the regen and revenant from the ashes all confused.
I say I think as if someone has not told me this every single time I've played this
character for the last two months but the jury's still out man I can hit you for
36 and I can hit you for 11 that doesn't seem like enough what if you throw
15 on top I can literally hit you for 47 I can hit you for 15 and I can hit
Oh, I can eat up to be one now, what a way!
This card's in my draw pile. Tragic.
You're still destroyed, so like, quit bragging about it.
Power potion, huge for the boss though.
Will you play Grand Finale in your lifetime?
I have played it in my lifetime in Slay the Spire 1.
Gather light is removed.
Go ahead and take it, man.
Will I ever play it in Slay the Spire 2?
I bet on a long enough time scale.
I bet I will play it in Slay the Spire 2, but it will be like by accident.
It'll be when I get it as my random rare from the start of a run, and then I can play it
in the first fight or something like that.
That's the most likely outcome.
The discovery is really good.
Kingly kick kind of good too.
Let's try the discovery first.
free draw a card and exhaust the card
yeah in hindsight I wish I played a card that like gave us some block
nine plating the weakness is important create a card that doesn't do anything
put up enough block I have played a card for no reason that's exciting can you
stop hitting me for 27 men
All right, I mean like it's kind of sucks ass he stopped
Is there a way to I guess I've got to kill this guy is that what you're telling me
It's devastating news.
You're going to hate me for this one.
Lady Antebellum posting.
How about two defense?
We take 23 damage.
And the next turn you don't attack.
Definitely still attacking.
But we kind of got up in that ass on this one.
We've not discarded at all.
Game three energy.
Wait, wait, wait.
Wait, wait, wait.
Headbutt back. Headbutt back at equilibrium, man.
And then just hit him.
I literally lived, bro.
That was an elite, right? Don't fuck with me, Walt.
Give me one more block.
We eat a Coastal Guard, make a skill,
that gives you energy and we're not fighting the door maker sometimes when
I watch you play I cringe because you make a mistake but then I play and I
make worse mistakes yeah I know yeah I know
It's been like that for years, for years.
Almost a decade at this point, in fact, they're gonna say this by R1, man.
This could not be a worse power potion to be honest, but please get rid of spoils of
battle and astral pulse.
I don't care if it's good to retain sovereign blade.
It just feels nice to get it out of our hand.
I gotta kill this guy way faster.
We won't be doing that.
We will be doing this stuff.
Deal 9 damage, apply any debuffs on this enemy to other enemies, not an aws, gonna be 18 damage
and put a soul everywhere in my fucking deck.
Huge.
Dump a sit.
Dump a... at this point, dump a severance, man.
We got our value out of it.
Now I gotta be able to kill you on this turn.
Motherfucker, man.
Motherfucker.
Oh good, we got to play minion dive bomb for free.
I have two skills in my hand, 14 damage, I'd rather have the weakness.
Literally retain your hand, retain your hand so you have vigor for next turn.
We're definitely going to lose to the queen now, I think they're going to be, they're
going to have popped off way too much.
a card just like for what purpose? You know what I mean? It's going to be that, and then
some prayer is going to be involved here. An ultimate strike. There's got to be something
better than this man. There isn't. Okay 35 damage. We played slip for free that's huge.
We have a weakness which is nice. Two random cards from the draw pile could go fucking
Crazy though. Fuck it, we ball. Mads, oh it transformed our jackpot! You can't do that!
That was a bit of a low roll, yeah. What are we playing? What are we playing? The
TIGER PEEE!
Wait, we can still make this.
And not be late for the next segment,
although I do have to download the game.
Okay, what are you doing? 19 damage.
Minion dive bomb.
Salvo.
Sovereign blade.
Drumming hatchet.
Pass turn.
Supermaster just fucked you, bro.
Automation, every 10 cards you draw gain energy.
I don't think I'd give a darn.
Two turns of weak now.
Kingly kick for as much damage as possible.
Automation because we can.
50 damage.
Yeah, we just played splash for free, bro.
Don't kill me.
Bro, they're going to kill me.
I have no block.
i have to kill you
how am i going to kill you
i can't kill you
can i get you to
can i get you to die to
the glass
Nope.
I just need a little bit more block, man.
I just need just the slightest amount of...
Whoa!
I thought Fork was 7?
Nah, man, it's 3.
There's 3 times on a Fork.
4 if you live somewhere else, so I think.
I remembered Fork at 7, too.
I think y'all are on the beta branch or something.
Good run, either way.
I'll be back in a couple of minutes.
I'm going to go P, and then we're
going to play a game that I need to remember the name of,
with Kate and Sivica and Giga.
Be right back.
you
you
you
Dude, I thought I was going to be late.
I'm early as fuck.
I'm four minutes early.
Average streamer?
I could probably fit one game of CS in.
a controller and kickback mother fucker man. Mother fucker.
Oh that's a crispy sparkling water. Oh damn. This is very 2000s. Like this is rap city.
Oh
So hi here
Wait, why am I drinking a fuck-ass sparkling water when I have a Pepsi zero?
I'm back. It took me a second to find it. I thought somebody stole that Pepsi hero.
And now the type of guy to press the red button. Now literally I found out recently that I'm
not in the streaming business, I'm in the PR business. As someone in the PR business
I have to hit the blue button because if I hit the red button and live I still die
Because my life is over if people find out I hit the red button. So I have to hit the blue button
It's that simple
Bogged on because someone in a group DM mentioned you were chatting on circumcision. Are you a moll?
Did they cut my shit off or did they just bend it back?
I think they just bend it back otherwise why would I have like that ridge man?
You know what anyone anyone here in circumcised that can back me up on this one?
Why would I have that ridge if it was cut off?
Unless people with four skins also have the ridge just under?
Ah, man, I'm not sure.
Maybe I just got to pull my dick out so we can figure this out
once and for all.
Oh, hang on though, I got to warm up first.
I know if I'm going to finally show a hog on stream,
I got to warm up first.
Because I'm not going from zero to show and hog.
You at least got to get the blood pumping a little bit.
I'm going to type ready when you are.
This is called Home Alone Game with Adlerly Momo.
She's lovely folks, we love her, don't we?
of us more than others me I'll be me the most me the most I would say yes but we
are a lot because she's lovely don't we
I don't know what to do.
Hello, gamers.
Hello. Hello, Bello. Hello, Bello.
Is it true that Ram is getting so expensive that Giga is changing her name to Mega?
Yes.
You know, Ram's gotten so expensive that I heard Giga's going to be changing her name to Mega.
I'm getting minus twos on my side.
Why would it go lower?
Because it's more expensive to get gigs than to get Megs.
Megs are cheaper.
Right.
Miga! Okay, wait.
Miga might be the play.
Miga.
Wait, hold on.
Why is the game sound still so loud?
Yeah, you gotta turn down a lot.
It has your kind of beat though.
Does my audio sound okay? Do I sound like suppressed?
You sound good.
Welcome to Bandit Trap, holy shit.
Maybe your vocal cord is compressed.
Wow, Kate.
I've been working on that.
I'm really self-conscious about that. Thank you.
well you aren't you the rocker I am the rocker so rock it out boy oh shit
literally one of us played the tutorial which is awesome because it means that
I don't have to play the tutorial I played the tutorial instead I would have to
play to four I will just have sin Vicka explain it to me well he's playing the
the game.
Uh, okay.
The tutorial really does not take that long.
It doesn't take that long?
No.
It would also help the audience to know what you're doing.
Oh, the audience!
Yeah.
See, Chad, I'm looking out for you.
I forgot about them.
You have exactly 11,101 viewers right now.
No shot, really?
Yeah.
Angel numbers, bro.
Angel numbers, make a wish.
wish oh just went down oh it's over it's over I'll try to take a screenshot they
said they said play play this game on a controller I know Ryan does not like I
will not be doing I will not be playing a controller haters that's crazy I'm on a
PC bro I'm like a cat I love the mouse you know there's a new steam controller
that came out. That's fair. Super expensive, which is furniture. Yeah, but maybe it's super
expensive because it's super good. Maybe that doesn't always correlate. Okay. I gotta get a steam
deck so I can play over massage on the plane. I heard Ram is getting expensive.
I heard that. I heard you guys call. Yes. Oh wait, we got to set up the thing. There's
our elusive. Oh, oh God. The thing. Ryan. The thing. Yeah. 1982. Kurt Russell. No, no,
the remake. The remake. Love that one. The remake. Okay. 2011. The onscreen. Oh, okay.
Yeah.
Just give me a second.
First time exploring the house using WASD.
Yep, looking agile.
So let's get even more agile.
I've done three nods.
We got a B-Tuber, so we got like actual...
Oh, we're doing the full visual.
You gotta flip your middle finger every time you're gonna...
Each little one of them will have four steps.
You want me to go and pick my PG image?
What is your highlight?
Why did you...
Why did you click that?
Wait, what were you doing?
My bad, my bad.
Look at all these old dudes.
You give me a second, I'm literally doing the tutorial.
Dude, why did I agree to join this?
Kace has insulted me non-stop here.
The two two old man or just the profile picture of this board and then me and Giga
Relying up the world
I can get a picture of like a like an old man I can find one
Can you make yourself?
Just print screen
Screen from my capture
Who said this tutorial was fast by the way because I've literally been in a
45 seconds. Oh God, it's not it's okay. It's not 45 seconds fast, but it's about maybe a minute and a half
Wrap a slingshot around furniture. Holy cow. This guy he gets a few years
Further out than me. Let's add the final touch by adding rocks to doors and a slingshot
How do you action oh
Oh
So essentially chat the game is home alone
There are there's one trapper who sets up booby traps in the house, and then I think three bandits try to break in
And the object is for the bandits to get ten treasures and the trapper to deal 100%
Smash brothers damage to
use the mini map in the top right and bandits have the ability to knock out the
trapper which buys them more time to loot and stuff I think I think that should
be the first trapper definitely not because I've only done the tutorial we
have a thing we're just doing the tutorial too you guys will have the
exact amount of experience that I do nobody you did it with in your own
time where everything was calm and because I'm prepared yeah exactly that's that's
all oh oh you're a lot of trouble you're in a lot of trouble you can also dive
into a trap furniture prop to manually activate your movie traps oh this does
more damage but has a higher risk of being spotted this game does have a
a good amount of chaos it seems so do you how drying you have to you have to walk
with the furniture I found that oh yeah I didn't they didn't make that obvious me
either I've been spotted oh they don't like it when she passed me
by using the small trapper wait why it's my house though it's my house and
they're the one who's robbing my house that's true isn't that kind of fucked up
that they're chasing me now I should be chasing them out there's a warning
label for the steam controller cancer and reproductive harm that's just
California being woke and like they think that's like a bad
Just slather a little BPA on the outside just as a nice little shot shell wrap a little
Something nothing. What's the appetite at Disney Land like walking into the restaurant and seeing a big sign that says eating here might give you cancer
How do I thank you trees it's birthdays tomorrow. Thank you
Oh, do I have to play as a birthday tutorial?
It's a really happy birthday.
Thank you, it's tomorrow, thank you, thank you.
Happy birthday, Civica.
Thank you, thank you, thank you.
Are you doing anything?
I will be streaming, we got Pokemon next tomorrow,
but also be doing some big streams,
so it'll be streaming and Pokemon.
I think I'm ready.
Oh, by the way, it's nice to meet you.
No, you have to do the tutorial at sea.
I don't think you have to.
I think so.
Don't think so I'll figure it out on the job
I'm gonna make cuz when I try to invite my friends it was like invite friend as this person
I'm gonna invite you. I'm gonna invite you as a bandit
All right, and then you are going to invite Giga
Yeah, I'm going through this tutorial. I'm trying or
You could just use this color that is that is on my screen
is the other thing that's a Chad don't do it I'll freaking kick you man how do I
invite you go I don't think I kid maybe this do you see a plus button on top of
these these empty pods my online one see much well I'll tell you what you can
just press z6jj0 and get in the game so big time if I knew as a damn bandit man
okay I'll play trapper first I don't care I was signing up this trapper but I
could play me and I think as a trapper you gotta mute yourself you think so
really well then what are you gonna say or you gonna be like or is that
I guess you could mute but like not.
You could mute discord.
You could mute in discord but you could be so hear them maybe?
Cause I mean you're gonna be in the same house so you'd be able to hear them talking, right?
Is there an in-game voice?
No, I don't believe so.
I hope not.
I'd be surprised.
Oh, not.
I'm not gonna worry about it until we get one game in that's for sure.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
We don't have different skins, I think there's a couple of default skins.
I'm like a little bit like a yellow trashcan.
They got the headphones right for a guy like me.
I literally think I just set the world record for drinking a Pepsi Zero.
I'll give you a little pro tip.
Why do you have a Pepsi Zero?
I got it yesterday when I picked this up, uh, dinner.
But then I said, I'm not going to drink this.
I'll save it for tomorrow.
Make for a special stream.
Oh, there we go.
Ooh.
That's pretty good.
I do like the, I do like this outfit.
They have skins in this game?
Do they have like, uh, customization?
Cool.
Yeah.
Uh, Coke Zero's bad for you.
pepsi zero I'm sure it's fine
now I got
confused I'm Sonic
this is Sonic
there you go I changed my
change my outfit
that is very sonic coated
although it doesn't look like you're wearing a french mage dress on the bottom
well maybe I'm a penguin
it looks more like penguin yeah
It's got a little Ronald Jenke's going on.
Yeah. Hey, it's time for a little
disorganized fun.
Right.
That's one over there.
I think he might have done the soundtrack.
Damn, they do have credits.
Oh, oh, let me see.
Who did the music?
Michael bomb could be could be Ronald Janky's new band
Michael bomb get a lot of stuff in this game. There's Michaels everywhere for those who dies to see them
How's the games out on my end kid is it too quiet? I think it's a little too quiet
As discord too loud
Blasting we had turned out this court a little bit
Kate's coming in too hot
Okay, so what now? Is it still too quiet? No, I think it sounds fine now.
Does it let you invite me now? I don't know if Kate can invite you, but if you
might have just do that. Yeah, I can give you the code. We kept the seat open for you.
I
Don't even do that
if you go to
If you get an online match, and then it should be in a private lobby if you get a friend's join private lobby
Then we got ninja in the game
Yeah, man, we got ninja in the game
Yeah, I know I look like ninja. I know how to kick field goals and my wife
always bringing me sandwiches while wearing no bra on on on ask for
On ask for no bra. That's all about so funny
It's such a flex such a white flex. Oh, what a cool guy
He was kind of spitting with the field goals though, although I
Don't keep the field goal with like wind and stuff like that from 60 yards away obviously hard
But it makes no sense to me that basketball players ever miss a free throw
People make so many excuses for tall basketball players, especially when they miss a free throw. They're like, of course
He missed the free throw. He's tall. Oh, you you all you gotta do is get the ball in the loop
Nobody's playing defense. Just you should be shooting like 95 from the line
Well, that's true. Then why did Shaq suck so bad a free throw? I think I literally I don't think he would tell you
I think he just didn't want to put the work in
I watched a compilation the other day of him doing his free throws and it was just like one of the most horrifying things to sit through.
He got paid to do that.
I think he was a height merchant. I think literally he was like, if you just give me the ball and the key, I'll score.
And when they shoot, I'll put my arms over my head and I'll get a block, so I don't need to do anything else.
That's why Wemby's gonna need to go.
And Kate, do you want to introduce this game?
I don't know about this game.
Where can I go if I wanted to get this game?
It looks far, so I picked it up.
It came out today.
I invited my friends over to play with me.
You guys screwed up letting me take downtown duplex.
Downtown duplex.
The duke tool can be very instructive and powerful.
I'm muting in this game to set this up.
Okay.
Guys, I'm taking the side steps.
Bandits are up in two minutes.
Let me take a look at the map.
power because it's the one we had obviously obviously I did the tutorial so I know what I'm
doing. We come over here and do this now let me think about this. We want to go to this one okay
step one perfect opportunity for a bomb right here right in the middle so when they try to get
I think I got a gate in Fourser, right?
Yeah, you can go Grinder, I'll go...
Springfist?
Okay, definitely.
Springfist, we're gonna blow them up with a bomb, then get in this to bash them against the treasure.
And we should put one more treasure right here.
Give me a...
Can move through walls, holy cow. Give me a homing rocket here. That'll fuck their day up.
Okay, now here.
They're gonna... Obviously they're gonna want some treasure right here.
where you put one more bomb to blow them up and then literally I don't know just
light them on fire there's more treasure over here that's that's hot you know what
give me another homing rocket right there that'll fuck their life up okay
whoa where we go where we go there's treasures over here this is a great
spot okay there's lots of treasures over here I want to see I want to see a
shock ball creating chaos right here I want this to be a spring fist so I
can bash them are you hearing these clicks and I want another homing rocket
right there you put seven out of 20 traps oh my god they're here in like
10 seconds man what is this what is this clicking
How many traps have I put down 0 of 5 fucking go man?
The bandits are coming!
Alright alright.
You guys are in a lot of trouble.
Whatever.
Don't get to look at your tools, don't get to look at your tools.
You're right you're right.
Vacuum cleaner. Oh, that was my vacuum cleaner. Wait, what the heck? Where's my hammer then?
Oh my gosh. I don't have anything. I don't have anything.
Oh my gosh, come here, come here, come here. They aren't even in the house yet, man. They aren't even in the house yet.
What are they thinking?
Wait, what? That's not... No, no, no!
I'm picking up too many stuff now.
That's not everything.
I have to not wear my stuff.
You guys gotta get in front of the door.
Wait, wait, wait, okay. I got the rest of the stuff.
This is what I need.
There's a torch in the door.
He's still in the damn window.
I don't know.
I don't even know where to go in the door.
Okay.
Okay, guys, don't worry.
I got the...
Oh!
Oh, he's right there.
He's right there.
Where?
Good luck.
I locked the door.
Oh my God.
You're in a world of hurt.
Oh my God.
If I knew what I was doing at all.
I hear a flamethrower.
I see him.
What's happening?
You literally don't see me.
You're not gonna get...
I hit you with a slingshot.
I hit you with a slingshot.
How do you feel about that?
I repeat that the bathtub is on the roof.
Uh-oh.
Oh my god.
I crashed.
Okay, hold on.
So make this crash.
I've taken out one of the bandits.
My god.
Uh, yep.
That's bullish.
See if I can rejoin.
Am I, am I doing it?
Are you, you look like you're harming yourself.
I don't know.
Uh-oh.
What are you doing here?
Get out of here.
I'm doing it.
I'm doing it.
Why does it take so long to get rid of the couch?
Your couch is not very effective.
No, no, no, no, no, no, no.
I am vacuuming the bed.
He's capping me.
He's capping the door, dude.
I don't think I put enough traps down.
I'm going to be honest with you.
guys guys I stole the I stole the bed wow you got one treasure nice after all
that time you got one treasure oh my god is here suck them up oh oh you don't
want to smoke
Oh shit!
Alright, so we'll get you in the next one. Don't even sweat it.
Yes!
Kill him! Kill him! He got get in here!
Okay, I'm gonna blow for his misery.
Ricky, thank you for the real ass tanker.
I literally hit you in my slingshot. Did you see that?
Oh my god.
Where did the plantar go?
I'm coming back. I'm coming back. I'm fucking you guys.
I'm fucking you up. I'm fucking you up.
I'm literally stealing everything that's in this room.
Oh my fucker. Let me guess you just got hit by my
shock ball. Let me guess. It's alright guys. It's alright.
It's alright team. I'm just stealing all this stuff.
Let me guess you're on freaking fire.
No, no, no, no, no.
Oh, Civic has faxed.
Oh?
Right, here's all the max.
Oh!
He's moving.
Oh!
You just got blown up!
Oh my god.
Wait, I'm alive? I'm so alive. Nope.
Oh, you are in a world of...
Oh! You're in a world of...
Wait, no. Never mind. I'm getting my ass kicked.
Great, that's right. I have a gun. Okay. I've got an entire gun
Yeah, goodness. Ah, oh I will I will
And then how do you use the enforcer?
You motherfucker, don't do it. I will suck you up
You literally only have five minutes. You're no you're in a lot of trouble. That's that's a long time
Yeah
How about now?
How about after you got a tornado?
Oh shit!
Bandit Giga's been knocked out!
No, no!
That's what you think, that's what you think.
Kill him!
Kill him!
Wait, I'm kind of popping off.
Did I kill him?
Where did you go?
He's got these upper right?
Sensor? Sensor?
I'm sorry. No, no, he's the bathroom. He's the bathroom. He's the toilet. He's the toilet.
Oh, he's the toilet. Yeah, come get me. Come get me. There's a shock ball in here, by the way.
Oh, my God. Oh, and the tornado. Well, you're shocked.
I've closed the game somehow. I've been knocked outside of my own house. Yes, man. Yes.
Is there a way to charge my usage of things?
I'm running out of battery.
Oh, I don't know.
Run out of this.
Why is there a fan in the bathroom?
I- I- Oh my god, oh my god.
We're getting toilet mugs.
This is crazy.
I'm doing some serious work.
I'm doing some serious work.
one oh it's gotta be that where's where did it go get over here you get a little
twerp oh and I'm out and I'm out after that I'm out kill him kill him where'd it
go oh did you see me did you see me I saw you I saw you use the batteries the
He's a toilet. He's a toilet again.
Oh, he's coming back up. He's coming up this floor.
Oh, shit.
Come upstairs.
Oh!
Oh, wait, she got me. She got me good.
Where did you go? Where did you go?
It's over here.
It's over here.
God, why am I so flat?
where you going you can't get here why are you upstairs what are you gonna do
you can't get here I'm just burning clock I'm burning clock oh I got one I got
one. What a shot dude. You have to steal more shit. I'm doing it. I'm doing it. I'm
so distracted. Okay in our defense that was a poofy one. All right. Look at me.
Way
This is kind of peak this is kind of peak
So maybe you took the least damage that game. Oh my god. I don't know why I hate you twice
We got three. Oh, okay, okay
Don't don't get the screwdriver. Okay, knock a screwdriver. Yeah. Yeah screw driver sucks
I'm getting like a chance off to murder the kid
That's a sentence
I've been here muted, isn't there, Tom?
Yeah, I just need an invite.
I was talking mad grass.
Oh, the coach changed.
The coach changed.
So they could have used you.
They could have used you.
I know.
Dude, the game hardened, but it hard crashed on me.
I believe in us.
I'm just like, hot.
I believe in us.
I'm just like, hot.
Whatever you do not take the screwdriver.
I think it's the hard pitch.
You want to run it back?
You haven't had enough?
No, we're getting a real match now.
He's such a little.
I was landing some crazy shit.
I'll go to Coastal Casa, LaLacasa.
Yeah, look at that.
But now the scary thing is now I know what I'm doing.
All right, we mute in deafen while we set up.
No, man, the house is too big.
Step one, you rush the power.
What do we want?
This is not, is there treasure here?
I forgot how to play the game.
Where's treasure?
Bro, there's no treasure.
There's a treasure right there.
OK, what do we want here?
I'm telling you, hammer's peaked.
Put a hammer right there.
And then on these, just start throwing some stuff.
Just some stuff that we can take over at any given
moment.
Little fire gun never hurt anybody.
Tornado that shoots through walls.
wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait.
Ok lots of treasure here.
Oh, the bathroom is a fucking treasure trove.
And look at these walls, they're begging for a shock ball bro.
Let's get 2 shock balls going in the bathroom,
they're gonna be too scared to do anything in there.
Then here, oh I'm getting some treasure, I'm getting some treasure!
Oh wait, a bomb just went off in my fucking face!
One minute...
Ok, and then I'm thinking this is where we land some skill shots.
We've got a spring fist in here.
Let me get an ice gun.
any questions yeah I don't think so now over here I mean this is this is fucked up
man let me get a water gun I don't even know what it does but I'm just
seeding stuff that'll make it easier for me to pop off in the future it's a
little bomb over there here I'll tell you what great opportunity for a spring
fist bash them into the wall think in this central location is basically
begging for a tornado and then here I mean right here if you're gonna be
thinking you're getting free loot I mean a bomb is just an obvious answer there
and then we got 33 seconds still I'm thinking you get a tornado that can
hit him through the fucking wall and then some shit that's close enough to
really pop off the shock ball to ruin their life and then you know what one of
these we just get something we ain't got yet going down a homing rocket all
right I'm ready the next floor yeah like what if he only hits the one on
the bottom and the person up top can just like shoot him, you know?
I'm ready y'all, I'm ready, I'm ready.
They can just stun him, but not actually kill him.
Okay, we're locked man, we're locked this way.
Okay, we win by looting the thing that we need to loot.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Don't me and you guys, we spawned at the same place.
I will find another one.
This is, okay, I've got my stuff.
There's a drill here, a jackhammer?
Jackhammer is not me.
Okay.
I found another box, I'll go this one.
This place is huge by the way.
It is huge, there's many different entrances and exits.
Kiga, Kiga.
I'm on the right here, I unlocked the door.
I see Ryder ready, I see him.
Oh, that was your slick with it on that one, that was a nice dodge, that was clutch.
Enemies.
I'm out this job.
Ooh, they're stuck in here.
I made it, he made it out.
I don't see any items yet
Okay, it's empty up here. I'm taking the other bedroom wait. They're getting some children already. Oh
We're crazy with an alley
Shit!
AHHHHHHHHHHHHH
They're healthy!
OHH OHH OHH
Get the kid, get the kid!
I stuck out the window!
Hold on, I'm coming back, I'm coming back!
Uh-oh!
Okay.
Oh my god.
Oh, this is...
I am flying, I am flying!
Where did he go?
That's the question.
Where's the gem?
I'm not gonna use this.
Oh, shit!
I found it!
I
You missed what the fuck I open slay this fire to I
Got him. I got him
I
Got him cuz I'm getting trolled back here. I'm beatin his ass huge. Oh, this cheers block away blueberry, dude
Oh
Landon hits that was 25% damage. Holy cow. You get me out of here
Tornadoes tornadoes. Oh god, it's trapped. No
I'm frozen
We have five already
Vacuum
They didn't show me a trap on there
I've been knocked out. I've been knocked out. Help.
Oh my god. Oh my god. Oh my god. Oh my god.
You guys are in the same.
Come to me.
I don't know where you are. How did you get up there?
Oh, we have to get out of here.
Get out of here.
Leave me alone.
Oh my god.
Where are you guys?
Help me.
And the lovely mobo has been knocked out.
On our way.
It's already over. I already took the damage.
Okay there's nothing in this room, I see him.
I'm here, oh I found you.
Find this.
What about that?
Damn we both kinda made.
Where did you go?
What?
There's someone on the brick.
Alright there's stuff, there's stuff here.
Bye.
I'm in.
Oh my god.
Yeah, this thing is crazy
We got we got plenty of time we got plenty of time look out look out
I'm coming I'm coming you're freaking frozen. I knocked him. I got a treasure out of it. You knocked me into my second house. Holy
The hell is this one more?
Treasure got treasure got yeah. Yeah
There's nothing in this room
Okay, I can't scan that so I'm guessing there's nothing there, it's just like a trap.
Okay, nothing.
Can't scan, do I scan?
Get over here you!
She just got me in the back!
Yes!
Oh my God, oh my God, I gotta do damage!
I gotta do damage!
Ahhhhhhhhhh!
Dodged it, dodged it!
That was actually huge, that was, that was insane.
The first floor in here is clear. I'm checking the pool table
Rise behind me
Ryan's here with me. He's got a tornado on me, dude
I'm popping off man
I can't get it!
We have 10!
We have 10!
We had 10!
We have 10, dude!
Oh, wait, wait, wait!
Oh, wow!
We had 10!
I think I unlocked
the next level of gameplay
to be honest.
That's messed up!
Every single trap was going off
in that room.
Oh, it feels good. Well, you guys were robbing me just for the record
Okay, okay understandable I
Will change my role to become a we had we had ten we had ten treasures. How do you how do you win the game is abandoned?
I think Ryan got there before us
Well, how about we call a trapper? I think I might have to change your role
I've changed your role to a trapper
Yes, and then invited sin big guy as a bandit
Unable to join bandit slots already claimed
I don't want it. Okay, that's false. I
Got legendary outfit might have to remake the game
It is open but when I try to invite him it says unable to play bandit mode.
It says he needs to do bandit tutorial.
You can open the tutorial and close out of it.
He already did it.
I literally just played the bandit.
Yeah, he was literally just a bandit right. Oh
Yeah, maybe I whoa wait
Yeah, I do it here. Okay. Have you played both sides tutorial? Oh
Yeah, I closed out of the
I'll just make you the leader and then you can invite some big back and yeah
Okay
I don't have to make the all my you can join with the xc2 b0
and no one else can't no one else let me see if crazy how that works i can do that
but chat did you see some of those shots i mean i was like
was it hard is it hard to play as a i was trying to dodge that tornado the best i could
You're actually like I feel like as the trapper you're almost invincible because you can dodge
rolls so fast yeah and then our movement is not that it's not the key isn't valid by the way
xc2 b0 yeah is it an o it's an o not a zero oh oh he's in he's in yeah
all right all right all right let's go let's do it that's definitely a zero but it's an o
Yeah. Yeah. So, I don't, do I need to defend myself? I did. I, because you want to place
traps super quick. You only have two minutes to place like 20 traps. Yeah. Yeah. Locked.
I'll just, I'll just place it fast. All right. All right. I'll go, I'll go crossing.
Okay, vacuum cleaner went crazy last time.
Oh my God.
Guys, what do you do in this game as this side?
You just so I don't I didn't use I've only used the drone scan.
I haven't used the VR scan or thermal scan.
I use thermal that they're all kind of similar.
You just you scan stuff and it'll say if there's stuff in it or not.
And then you break it and take the stuff and you do that.
while under siege from like five hundred drones
and I want you further.
So you don't know where the treasure is as the bandit.
Right, right.
Okay, so you walk in and you scan
and then you go, oh, this one's treasure
and then you start smacking it.
Exactly.
Okay, do you go in with something?
Like you go in with a screwdriver?
You can pick it from your perks.
Oh, but the stuff that we're getting right now
is like not relevant.
You're going to pick this and when you load in and you go grab a box, one of those things
is going to show up and there's going to be some other stuff.
These on the belts right here are just for tutorial purposes.
He didn't do the bandit tutorial.
Ryan, when we get there to your drop-off location, it's going to be these blue chests.
That's where you get your stuff from.
But if you spawn at the same location as somebody else, it gets mixed up.
You can run somewhere else.
I'm in the alley.
I went to the crossroads.
I took the park whatever it's called.
We should be on separate lanes.
Allegedly.
We'll see.
Allegedly.
You know, it was pretty easy to get all those traps out.
Well, no pressure.
No pressure.
See, we'll see.
All right, Kate's going down.
OK, Bob, just sighted.
Oh, I see you.
I see you.
What do you do with money?
I don't know.
Great question.
Excellent question.
I can't go in these doors, where am I?
I see Kate, she's right in front of me, in this room over here.
Kate goes crazy.
Does it really take two minutes to get through the door?
How'd I become the thing?
I see you.
Oh, she's in here, she's in here.
Bridge, she's in the bridge.
I'm outside.
She can't get me.
I'm in y'all.
Come on Kate.
Come on Kate.
Oh God!
I'm gonna fire her.
I was like, oh my God.
Okay, she can't catch me.
Wait, wait, wait.
What's this though?
Hammer's not very effective.
I'm trying to get her.
You guys have fun.
I'm gonna head.
She's got a tornado.
Can you get run?
Oh my God.
Okay, we're good.
We're good.
She's the fridge.
She's just got everything.
everything where's Ryan don't worry about me and don't worry about him I'm
learning how to play them oh fair like it hit myself with the treasure I'm going
for some crazy scans right now stuck Kate Kate no I'm where's Ryan don't worry
about Ryan other side of the map yeah well you were distracted
Where did you go?
Oh, what is this?
I wonder where I went.
Where did you go?
Who is this?
You see anything?
That one, the cooltainer trap.
You guys are in trouble.
There's something here.
She's here.
Where?
In the chair.
What's she doing?
I don't know.
It's hitter, hitter, hitter.
No I'm getting some treasure.
Oh god it's trapped, it's trapped, it's trapped.
I keep thinking ship to sprint dude.
I keep forgetting the emote wheel.
Ryan there's something in here.
The hell is this?
This is this?
Yeah, enjoy this toilet.
I'm gonna have three treasures while you're distracted over there Kate.
I'll kite them. I'll kite them.
What's this? She's burning me to death?
I'm being burned to death on my little bottom. Oh, I got health juice.
Whoa, whoa, whoa! I know that did.
Ow, ow! No, you kicked me out! I knocked her out of the house.
Okay, okay, okay.
Oh my god, how do I go back in? How do I go back in?
I found a treasure I got one nice nice I got three chill on the shot
I can't close the farm and over there look another one five out of ten do okay
here open the doors I can't she's trying to get me with a bed did you get the
The treasure that dropped in there?
Oh my god!
My!
Get over here!
I think I have this whole place cleared out.
Run! Run, run!
Huge.
Huge.
I'm gonna get the health juice.
Bro, free treasure.
We already got six.
No, we're good.
We're good.
Dude, how did you...
Wow, how was Ryus so good?
This is messed up.
This is actually so messed up.
Oh, she locked the door.
Oh, she locked the door.
Oh, she locked the door.
Oh, she locked the door.
Oh, she locked the door.
Oh, she locked the door.
Oh, she locked the door.
Oh, she locked the door.
Oh, she locked the door.
That's right.
Yeah, we break it.
Don't even worry about it.
We break it with this.
What is this?
Oh, whoa!
Whoa!
A beer trap!
Friendly fire, y'all, my bad.
I got a beer trap, I got a beer trap.
Got this.
You got that, okay.
Maybe I'll work on it, too.
Oh, God.
Get her, get her.
Get her!
Oh my God.
Okay.
Scanning, scanning.
Oh, they're all treasure!
I'm sorry, he's my grinder!
Get her! Get her!
Oh my...
What the hell are you doing?
I'm in the other room!
She's over here with me.
I don't know what you guys are getting.
She's over here with me.
What the fuck?
I caught her in the bear trap!
It's not over.
It's not over.
We gotta find more treasure.
Please devs put anything better than the shift key
For emotes anything better
What is this what is this purple stuff? I don't
Oh
I got treasure baby
We only need two treasures this is huge oh god it's in the sink right it's in the sink in the sink
In the sink. Yeah that one owns owns
Drinking she'll she missed me she in this bathtub. Oh my god. She's with me. She's with me
I'm going down a trap. Yeah, there's a chair. There's a chair. I'm scared on the lowest level
Right here. I've got one right here. I think
I'm frozen. I'm frozen. It's right in the middle of two traps.
Get murdered. Get murdered. Get murdered. Get murdered.
You don't know about this movement, dude. You don't know. See that? You're about to know.
Where am I? Oh, can't find me.
I understand, I understand the controls.
Where'd they go?
You guys you got to be really careful with the grinder.
Why? What are you guys doing?
You could easily hit yourself with the grinder.
Oh, like that?
Yup.
What are you guys doing?
I'm getting tons of money. I don't really know what you do with it though.
Yeah, but you guys need the gems.
I need the gems. You're not wrong.
I knocked you over so much.
You can't, can't the door, dude.
I am, I am.
Watch me.
No.
Watch me.
Watch me and I will.
No, dude.
You gotta go somewhere.
I don't.
She's a wretch.
She's a wretch.
She's mad.
Do you see that?
We need two more.
We need two more.
Watch this.
Okay, I'm watching.
I'm watching.
Crazy.
Insane servo play.
I don't think the left side has any treasure. I've been scanning.
There's one that has to be in here. This is the only room that she hasn't let me in yet.
I got her! I hit her! I got the knife treasure! I got it! It's in here! It's in here!
Oh
No
All right, I literally didn't even know what I was doing so we run it back
You get in the tower and then you just click on them from the overhead view
post it. Yeah. Yeah. So, I still kicked your ass. The fuck? We had we had that down. We
had it. You were one off one. I knew where it was. It was in that bathroom. I was like
I was working on it and then a shock ball came out of nowhere and then someone's grinder
hit me and that was it. This seems like what are you guys doing? They put me in the
I had to quit.
They said you did so ass that you need to learn how to play the game.
I'm like, oh, I got a new perk.
Can I get an invitation?
I can't invite you because you are hiding what you're playing.
Okay, it does actually differentiate between zeros and o's.
So Kudos to them.
Yeah, it's got the little line, KW0EO.
Does anyone know how to join a gang?
gang. Giga's calling a radio station over there. You didn't lie, KW-Zero Evo. A-O-Zero
E-O. I'm the guy who normally hosts. I don't really know where the join game button is.
Uh, you hit, uh... It's a really weird spot, I'm trying to remember. Yeah, it's in like
the top right hand side to get a cross play. Oh! Put in the code there. And can I
get that code one more time. KW0EO. KW0EO. Key valid y'all. I'm ready as bandit. All right,
all right, I got it. Ooh, new map. Luna Lodge at Shilisha Lane. Cut the Christmas lights,
Man, of course, the cold weather Swiss chalet slogan used to be life should taste as good as Swiss chalet, bro
You're literally chicken and fries. I think that's serious
Okay, you guys pick your landing zone. I'll pick the heat. I'll pick the opposite. I'll take parking lot. Okay
Yeah, I I don't even know the name of what I picked. I'm gonna be so real with you
I'll stick parking lot
Hold on. Can I go? Will they let me go back? They
I take the porch so you'll take garden garden obviously I want to grinder first thing I get grinder I
Know everything about this game now you guys are so so screwed okay
Yeah, well my life power washer is gonna pay dividends. What does it do the power washer?
It's essentially the same exact thing as the vacuumer Torx. You just kind of pointed at something and move around and beat it up
And you want to hit green you don't want to hit yellow I'm learning right yeah green good even though like green is
Uncommon and yellows legendary
Yellow is rare
What are you playing in 2026?
So you just fire bro, I
Want to know what the what I found like health juice and like a shield and everything. What does that actually do peptides?
peptides
Backbook pro baby. What's the deal with that time?
10 pro baby
It's over for you. I scanned your toilet man. This will be so good
Kate likes to put traps in the small rooms, so be careful of them.
She loves bathrooms, I've noticed.
Yep.
Her own bathroom.
She doesn't seem to like mine as much.
Why is that, Kate?
Got a reason?
It's a dirty poop or something.
Here's the strap.
One is the clean bathroom, one is the toilet bathroom.
Not a bad idea.
Unmatched.
Well, I'm in the building just a hundred times faster than I was last time, so that's
a plus.
Yeah.
What's the bad part of waiting?
Rhymes aren't even hit.
I've already been hit.
I'm in.
You can't outrun me, dude.
You know I'm the movement god.
Oh shit.
Oh don't do this, just call me again!
I'm in a tornado.
I'm in a tornado.
Wait, she's activating the traps at a rate never before seen.
Kate!
One treasure down, easy.
I've got her, I've got her on my side.
You do, I'm on, you do that, I'll farm treasure.
I'm trying to farm pressure too.
I got one, I got one, I got one.
Huge, huge.
Nice, whatever, two.
Whoa!
I deflected it!
Did you see that?
What is that sound that I'm hearing?
She's in the bookcase!
Get over here!
I literally just lit you up with my laptop.
Okay, this top bedroom where I'm at, it's clear, there's nothing in here.
She's in that.
She's in that.
I know, I know.
Oh, I got hit by the shotgun.
Oh
I'm fried you won't you get I'll go in there. I got the treasury all I got a treasure. I actually wait in there. Oh my god
Oh my god. Oh my god. I beat her up and took her stuff
No, no, no, I'm holding this I like you
Nope. No, my movements crazy. You can never
Actually, I trip the traps in your
okay the fuck is that they're everything we've been through this treasure in
here this treasure in here oh shit shit I'm trying to get you all oh my god there's
so much credit here literally trolling me with this help dude I'm there like
I just felt sunblocked.
Help.
Help, Giga.
Okay.
I got you.
I'm about to come in the door.
Get out of here.
Get out of here.
Get out of here.
Look at that movement.
Look at that movement.
Oh.
Oh.
Oh.
I couldn't see anything in there.
Get rid of the skeleton in the wall.
Oh, there you go.
Ryan, there's a treasure right here.
It's in here.
It's in here.
I'm lighting her up, bro.
Okay.
You light her up.
I'm drooled this.
Watch this.
are you trying to go outside that's that's illegal move it
get out of here what the heck what just happened whoa she's locked the door that
was you I was on your shoulders I know I got her I got her I got her I got a
treasure I got a treasure yeah yeah I'll finish I'll finish opening this
one nice I got another one she's in the damn bookcase no you keep it up I'm
going in I'm I'm trying to dodge it's in the right bookcase run right about the
screen. Right bookcase. There's
everything flying in this room, dude.
Run. Okay, I got the treasure. We're on
seven. We're on seven. Oh my God.
Coming up to you. I'm coming up to
You need help you need help I'm very hurt. I'll revive you
There's so many traps in here. I I'm getting I can't move. I cannot move
Can't just beating me up in here. Did you get them? Did you get the treasure in there? You're chilly. Okay, I do
I'm not chill. I can't move
There's no treasure in this bedroom. I'm on eight treasures. I'm on eight treasures
Okay, okay.
Where the hell am I?
I'm freezing to death.
We'll come real back in.
Oh my God.
It's gotta be in here.
It's gotta be this room.
There's no one that's not.
I'm being chased by every
trash in the world.
I'm gonna open this door.
But it has to be that room.
There's just no way.
Dude.
I
Every single trap that was possible Kate was hitting me with
Single bandit win Milord a single bandit win go trap. I'm going to r slash bandit trap
I got hit by one trap and then Kate hit me with another trap into another trap. It was non-stop
It was non-stop dude
Every room I got hit by multiple traps because Kate was sunlocked
Okay, anyone wants to be a trapper?
It's really good. You do feel insanely powerful a little it runs into a room
And then you just click all the buttons in the room and watch them scurry
That's true.
No, run it back. Run it back with this one.
Oh, he's got a chip on his shoulder.
That was a fluke. That was a total fluke.
You don't want to do the trapper again.
No, be a trapper again. It's over for you.
Okay, okay.
I like when you're the trapper because I can tell which room stuff's in
because you just found like 5,000 traps to go off at once.
Exactly. I can hit every single one.
You can- you can shit tuck in the lobby.
You can shit tuck in the lobby.
Oh
Oh, thank you, thank you
Okay, should look like the Marina Bay sands
The Marina Bay sands
There's some glass on the pool
I'm going helipad. I'll go penthouse
All right, I'll go office. I
Don't like the VR scan really. I love
I like thermal, thermal is kinda the one.
I like the drone scan, it tells you instantly what it is.
I'm just gonna go ahead and freaking say it, the best weapon is the nail gun.
I couldn't get the nail gun down for the last time.
For breaking furniture?
For breaking, yeah.
Really?
Grindr is a little tougher.
good but it's just too uh the fact that it can hit you or other teammates is
just kind of a deal breaker for me. When you get it on the corner though it's
actually awesome. Yeah.
Yeah dude I it was every single room I I would get hit by a trap and while I'm
dodging that trap Kate would chase me with another trap
into another trap
and I couldn't get out of the room.
CUT! CUT! CUT!
Whatever, Kate.
Let me figure out this nail, then. What do you...
Point at what you want to break, and then hold it till it hits green, and it shoots like...
It's like a needle or something, Halo.
Yeah, this thing's crazy. I was doing it all wrong last time, man.
Oh
Yes, you probably yeah, it's actually the needler
Also, it's swag. It's swag. Oh, okay. Oh, there she is. There she is
How do you find that you're done? Oh space is the dodge roll. Yeah, damn. She was doing all that with no dodge roll
I would explain why she couldn't catch me, I thought my movement was good but maybe she
just wasn't rolling.
I was not rolling.
Wait, this is impossible to use.
Are you trolling?
One for Don, one for Don, one for Don.
Where are they?
Got one right here.
He's freaking out, man.
Okay, okay.
Guys, I think it walks by default, Chad.
It walks by default.
Got one.
Nice.
What the heck?
Oh, it's trapped.
Tommy, Tommy.
Tommy, Tommy.
What's up?
Oh, it's trapped.
It's dummy.
It's dummy.
What the fuck?
I got thrown through a wall.
Ooh, this stuff.
Okay, dummy.
Yeah, she knows about the dodge roll balance.
I can see her moving different.
I'm in.
Oh, no, no, no.
Oh, oh.
Oh, God.
Got another one?
How about that?
How about I broke your fucking tower?
I have blown myself off the map.
How is Simvica so good?
Rodney Mullin, baby.
Rodney Mullin.
Oh, Rodney Mullin.
Uh-oh.
You guys are getting your ass beat, huh?
Wait, you have four treasures already?
You guys are the ghosts.
Yeah.
We're going crazy.
I got another one. I got another one. I got another one as well.
Stop it. You can't stop me.
I can't stop. Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa. What the heck just happened?
I got thrown off the map. What? Yeah, yeah, happened to me.
I forgot. I see, I see. She's in the walls. She's in the walls.
Watch out for the shock trap here. She got me. Oh my God, she's knocked me off the building.
the building yeah she did that to me too
she's a sicko she's just off the edge guys there must be treasure in here the
way she's protecting it yeah another one got another one we're an eight oh my
god grabs
guess what I'll drink the healing juice I don't give a fuck
Oh, it's Kate.
This room is done.
I got nine.
I got nine.
I got nine.
No!
The Civic that's carrying right now.
Ow.
Oh, this little office here, she set off two traps instantly, three at three.
Oh, Kate's right there.
She's right there.
Yeah.
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
Whoa, whoa, what happened to the table?
Oh, I almost got her right here. It's right here. It's right here cactus cactus
I got it. I got it. I got it. I told you
I told you it was a fluke.
Oh, we've got seven treasures.
I got seven of them.
Oh, my god.
Crazy.
10 treasure at what cost?
Do you want to get Trapper Geekers?
I'll do it.
I'll give it a little, a little try.
You will click on.
Oh, you've already got it. Look at that.
Yeah. Oh, yeah.
I'm looking at a new perk.
Dude, I can be a little policeman.
Oh, my God.
Oh, snap.
I mean, you're breaking into your house and stealing your stuff.
Shouldn't we be dressed as the cops?
No.
No, wrong.
All right. It's gotta be the lodge.
I got a perk that allows me to go through the trap door.
trap uh the trap doors
now that they're leveling up we're gonna be the best bandit
shit look like the cabanas at Polynesian
i'm going small i'm going small i go i'll go large
i'll go beach
okay you were doing a good job thank you thank you
Yeah, you're doing a great job.
It was, it's a really fun as a trapper.
Until you trap me in that one room.
That was the best thing ever, what are you talking about?
Oh wait, Ryan, can you get on top?
How'd you do that? How do we do it at?
Oh.
Okay. If you hit space on somebody.
No, you just climb on them.
No, you actually like, yeah, there you go.
I can throw you.
Whoa!
Yo.
Ride's full.
Oh.
Oh, wait, wait, wait, wait.
Can't get back on. Let me see if I can jump and throw you.
There we go.
Oh, we found New Tag.
New Tag, New Tag.
What's the screwdriver good at?
Breaking locks?
Yeah.
Can I tell you, you guys used the
enforcer yet the battering ram I could throw you over walls the screwdriver
stocks by the way I like that like every tool has its own different sort of
yeah game yeah yeah yeah the driller is really good for furniture and locks
you see that shit it's also really good at attacking the trapper that's Kate
You can jump and throw her over walls right?
Oh wait, like IRL or?
Yeah, yeah.
Excuse me?
IRL.
Oh, with the spoon getting spin the mouse.
Alright, let's get Giga.
Okay.
Yippee.
Oh my favorite items, imagine that.
Oh he's so full dude.
She pumped me full of water, I'm already at 10%.
Giga, she's camping the doors.
You guys are free to roam.
Huge.
Do it my best, do it my best.
Hacker voice, I'm in.
Hacker voice, I've clicked outside of the active window.
There's a lot of stuff going on in there.
First treasure located.
Here, I got one.
I got one.
Nice, nice, nice, where two?
Giga's still in here, she's camping me.
I saw that, I saw that 7 you got last time, I don't know what to do with that.
Oh!
What the?
I got another one.
She's parking.
It's another trap.
No, you won't get me.
You will not get me.
You will not get me.
Oh!
Oh my god.
bro there's a chair coming up here dude I'm I'm being carried by a bookcase
through the house I cannot move oh no oh no oh I still everything that's in the
small did I like you on fire I I am being absolutely gang banged by really
really dude it is just nothing but furniture on me
I'm gonna take all the damage no no one can even get to me
oh my god there's a jam right there it's mine oh I'm roasting this child I'm
I'm rotting, Giga.
Ooh.
Get out of there!
I'm here with Giga.
Do whatever you want.
Do whatever you want.
Do whatever you want.
Maybe you can destroy walls, by the way.
Wait, really?
Holy cow.
Ah!
You know that?
I found her.
I see her.
I can't get in there though!
I don't know how to get in there.
Oh no. She's in the trap thing.
Don't even worry about this.
She threw a bomb at me!
Anything going on in here?
I found the treasure!
I'm going in!
I see Geega.
No, no, no, no!
I got her!
I knocked her out of the house!
You guys are doing some wonderful work, by the way.
I think gun I'm just kind of like a worker
Okay attacking me again, man, I got another one we just need three more
Frozen I'm down I'm down
I'm down guys
I think Ryan's closest to me Ryan. Okay. I I'm so far away from them on the other side
Are you sure cuz she's trying to hit me with the ball so I think I'm on to something
Stop with the shot ball
How do you know there's nothing in that you gotta scan it but then it's a green question mark
No
It shows up as green question mark to me
It's got it that's me there's something in there, but you don't know what it is
So it could be a trap, but it could be treasure. It could be treasure. I I scanned it there and there was nothing there I
That that room is also dawns in Victor. Okay. Okay. Okay. I think the two left is
The bottom it's the what I think it's the top right because yeah, I don't have anything to break
So I don't have anything to break this unfortunately
That's right. I booted out. Okay. Hold on
Oh, that's the one right there.
Apparently, I have a scanner that finds traps, not one that finds treasure.
Oh my god.
I've become inflated.
Oh no.
No!
Oh yeah!
Alright, how many caves did you find, Ryan?
You can see it for yourself, I've got one.
But is it really like the VR scanner doesn't find...
No, it just tells you if there's a trap or if there's something of interest.
So all of everything that you guys have tells you if it's treasure?
Yes.
Oh my god, no wonder I'm assed.
I've been having a break like four pieces of furniture to find one thing of treasure.
Like that doesn't hardly seem as fair.
The guy who did the tutorial was the worst one?
I thought it was good.
Okay, now I know how to be the bandit, so I'm not even concerned about this, it's all over for Giga.
We'll see, we'll see.
Season item unlocked, blue bolt.
I only get stronger as the rounds go on.
Season item unlocked, the British discovering salt.
For the first time.
We did everything in the villa.
Yeah, yeah.
It's the small rooms you gotta be careful of.
It sucks so much for you guys that you're not bald.
Having a hot head and putting cold hands on it feels so fucking good.
Oh man.
I'm going pool.
I'm going garden.
I guess I'm going porch.
I'll be using the drone scan this time.
Yeah.
I'm going Rodney Mullin mode.
You asked if this is worth the $15 three times.
It's too early to really tell because we just started playing but it's a lot of fun.
Maybe he's talking about a six inch cold cut combo from Subway.
Possibly.
These days.
You know what I'm saying?
Subway flation.
Subway a little bit.
for the first time in a long time I walked into Subway,
looked at the menu and walked out.
Cause I was so pissed at the price I walked outside.
I couldn't do it.
Walking in talking like Ice Cube, oh hell no.
Not today.
I ain't the one.
I'm the one today, the one today.
Subway's not very good.
Had it last night, we hit the spot.
What's your sandwich choice?
Put long rotisserie-style chicken on Italian herbs and cheese.
Lettuce, tomato, red onion, black olives, pickles, cucumbers, one line of yellow mustard.
So everything, man?
Well, no, because I don't think the green peppers improve the quality of the sandwich, to be honest.
And I don't need spinach and lettuce.
I'm okay with just the lettuce.
But how many people do you know that you actually get like the banana peppers?
I thought apparently they're really popular according to r slash sub where they're one of the most popular topics
But I find that you can go really they make the whole sandwich just tastes like banana peppers. So for me. I'm not a huge fan, but
All right, we got this we got this yeah now that I know what I'm doing. It's over
I'm locked. I'm locked
She's gonna camp the same door I'm going to do again
I hear her inside.
You're ready for this.
Oh, I've clicked outside the active window, y'all.
Okay, good.
It's already popping off.
Watch out, y'all.
I've already been thrown out of the house.
You're not alone for this world.
There's treasure.
Nope, nope, you won't hit me.
What is happening?
Boom, already, already.
Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, you're in trouble.
Uh-uh, uh-uh.
I've been exploded out of the map by a bomb.
My bad, y'all.
Oh my God.
Hold on, hold on, hold on.
Check I get a treasure check on everyone real quick. There's nothing here. Nothing here nothing in here. Oh
God I'm scanning for treasure
The hell she got a she's on she's chasing me with a lamp man just the drawers on the
Everything and I'm everywhere. What wait, I thought I hit thought I hit you apparently not
brother there is
There is a billion traps in here
This bandit perk does not work
The kid is on me!
It must be in somewhere in the bathroom.
It has to be.
I scanned this one.
Oh my god, it's in the bathroom!
It's in the bathroom!
The toilet!
This isn't scanning!
Don't you do it.
Don't you do it.
Nope. You will not catch me.
You will not catch me.
But I'll catch you!
Treasure check everybody.
No, no, no, no!
I've got one in here, I've got one in here.
What the heck?
Got it, got it, got it.
You're K-O'd.
You're K-O'd.
Aw, but there's no one near me to help me.
I'm coming, Kate.
I'm coming.
I'm coming.
Where are you?
I'm here.
It's insane in here!
The toilet.
The toilet.
The toilet.
The toilet, the toilet, the toilet, the toilet, the toilet, the toilet, the toilet, the toilet,
Okay, obviously that's a trap, I've seen it in a trap.
No.
No.
Yes, I got one.
We're halfway there.
There's Giga, Giga's on me.
I'll just dodge.
I'll kite.
I got it, I got it.
Giga's on, Giga's on right here.
Yeah
They're stuck they're stuck in the wall
I'm out this
Oh my god, this whole that's a hallway of death up there
It's all me in here
I thought you get I'm getting the job. I'm getting the job. Oh god. Oh you guys right here
I know don't don't follow you go focus treasure focus treasure. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, I
I got the job. I got the job, but we have to get giga right? We have to catch this
No, that's that's not that's not a requirement she just drops the gym if we knock her out
There's there's furniture flying everywhere. I've been knocked out y'all
come to me, come to me. Where are you? I blocked Geegas door. Where are you? I blocked her
from putting the chest of drawers inside of the bathroom. I got you, I got you, I got
you, I got you. Huge. You get the bathroom, I'll get the sink. Bathroom clear. I think
it has to be a kitchen. The kitchen is crazy. Okay, bathroom, bathroom didn't have anything.
I've already scanned the bedroom I think.
Maybe not.
What the fuck is going on with that lamp, man?
I don't know, man.
It's scary.
The furniture that trap is inside, it cannot have jam in there.
I got her!
I got another one!
I lit myself a fire!
I lit myself a fire like a damn fool!
Okay, there's nothing in there's nothing in that in that hallway
Nope, you will catch me nope, you won't catch me you will not catch me
We're at one. I don't know where one where it won. Don't take any other damage down to one down to one
confirm confirm
confirmed I'll stand outside of the house
Kate's getting zapped
93.
What the fuck are you told outside?
Kikita!
I've got it right here, I've got it right here.
I ain't the one baby.
Get her, get her!
I'm trying, I'm trying.
Watch out Kate, watch out.
Imagine.
I'm frozen!
No!
No!
It had to be in the laundry room.
Ohhhh, it changed with the damage taken.
What did you do, guys? What did you do?
Dude, I revived two and I hit her once.
And I took the least amount of damage.
I scanned. They should do scan count. I scanned a lot.
You can get 99% and still lose man. I'm so ready. I think I'm locking him out.
This game's kind of gas. It is kind of gas. I'm getting out. It's like an RTS when you're playing.
Yeah, yeah, yeah. It's like a star-spotted event when I battle a park.
A monster could go through trapper's hatches. Yeah, that's what I was saying.
light illuminate the dark flames
they're still a village I'm the only one holding out for this show lay it's too
cold man the game's in there my bad there you go I wanted to stop clicking
like off the screen I guess I go to port again I'm like the master of this map
I don't know if you're aware of how much power you've given me I
Could go through the trappers hatches. You're so done
You're so done
You get likes her she likes her water trash, so I'm gonna go I do something that counters that oh don't tell her don't tell her
Yeah, she can hear me.
You should take fire and then make that's that's what I was doing.
Yeah, and then make the water so hot that it turns into steam and it's useless as water.
Yes.
Watch this.
Try this.
I'm gonna try the tripwire.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Sure.
Sure.
Shut me off while I'm trying to unlock the door.
Okay.
I need a lot of swordfish
I'm going to the other room you guys clearly need that room to yourself
It reminds me of an awful lot of the movie swordfish
Hey, hey, I'm sucking you off man
That's true, let me know in the comments
I don't want to be a part of this room or this team really
I'm playing soccer ball up here
Alright
I
Know I'm talking about got it done it again y'all
Music's very good in the game self beats. It's kind of gas
It's not much I could hear it when we're playing cuz
Well a lot of talking to
All right
I'm locked and loaded. I'm good
Don't feel that
We need you right there
right there
From the front door this time. I won't get screwed up by the RNG. Oh my god. We I said which way we were going
I said pull I know Ryan went to the same place. I did I can't open the shit. I hope you can open this shit
I can open it. Oh
Whatever I got my own
I hear her inside.
Oh, I just got literally flattened as soon as I walked in.
Oh my god, this kid.
Wait, I'm right here.
I see her.
She went up.
She's up here.
There's furniture flying everywhere up there.
Keep her busy.
There's so much furniture that you're telling me there's nothing.
There we go. There we go.
Oh my God, there is...
I go hard for my city. That's two treasures in the bank.
Nope! No! What? It didn't show me there's a trap there.
Got it.
Watch out. Geeg is around.
Oh god, Kate you scared the shit out of me.
Look out, look out, look out!
Kate look out!
Oh shit!
Oh my god.
Good night y'all.
This plenter is looking too suspicious.
No, I've already scanned it.
He's right here, he's right here.
I got her.
Can't get her, you gave it up.
No I got her.
The plenter has a chance.
Oh my god.
I know, I know, I know.
Oh my god.
Get her.
I'm welcome.
Get her.
No, I'm frozen.
Oh, Ryan, you got to rest me, you got to rest me,
we'll take the damage.
I'm resurrecting you.
Oh, you have to rest me, rest me, rest me.
I'll resurrect you.
Thank you, thank you.
Damn, I might be the both.
How we doing?
No, you will not get me.
You will not get me.
Honestly, it's kind of fucked in there.
Oh, I hope I can try that again.
Oh my god.
You're in the right there.
Oh my god.
Okay, okay, that's okay, that's okay.
Persistence.
Got a laundry machine, one of the washing machines in the laundry room.
Okay, the bathroom's clear, the bathroom's clear.
This planter is taking forever to break.
I got knocked.
I got hit by a jail.
Bro, I'm being chased by furniture.
Dude, there's furniture everywhere.
That was a crazy shot ball
Insane I'm insane with it. Well, yeah, we are your shit is chasing me, but I'm chasing you
Is the laundry room clear I believe so oh
My god, oh my god. Oh my god. Oh my god. I'm gonna I'm in a world of hurt
I'm breaking the walls of the damn house
You I'm in a liminal space. I'm in the back rooms. I
I can't I can't do anything!
I've been knocked out y'all.
Does this one have?
Oh no.
Guys I'm taking a ton of damage.
I'm taking a ton of damage.
I'm gonna go down.
I'm gonna go down.
No I got shocked trying to get to you.
I'm gonna go down.
I'm down.
I'm down.
Oh my.
Can you be saving?
No!
No!
Treasure check?
Dude you guys are still good!
Treasure check anybody?
I know.
I got to hit more time to save you all than anything else.
That's that all that's there?
All that's there?
Just see how many times I hit the trapper.
Most treasures, least damage taken, most revives.
MVP, okay.
Okay.
Um, I could be Trapper, but if anyone wants to swap.
Oh, I finally got the...
We gotta be Giga.
Yeah.
All right, all right.
Play till you lose.
Okay, okay.
I just got a legendary hat.
Oh my God.
It's really good.
Oh, damn.
Oh my God.
You're looking like a wet bandit with a gold tooth.
I haven't been trapped for yet because we're gonna try to beat Giga slicker slicker than the guy with the thing on his eye
Know what I'm talking about. Nope. Nicki Minaj super bass. Oh
How many lyrics do you think you know?
15,000 like is it like is it like one per song?
I'll get I'll get we're casting a wide net or is it like
I've got an alley.
Does that changes it?
It is a good question. I don't know if I have an answer for you.
I'm one of those cast-a-bye-net kind of people, so I'll say something and people will be like,
wow, you know so much about music, but I just know one line for song, you know?
I listen to a lot of different types of music.
I listen to everything but country and rap.
Yeah. Well, I listen to rap and anything that's not in English.
Except for video game songs in Japanese.
Have you guys ever used Nailgun?
Nailgun's peak, Kate. Yeah.
Really? Yeah. Oh, yeah.
Nailgun seems so hard to use.
It's like an easler, Halo.
But what is that?
Power Gloves.
Yippee.
I saw it in the vision
Oh my god, it's amazing
It's limited use though
The items with the construction pattern over it seem like they are limited use
Just like the bear trap they hit gate with
Bear Trevance, you just launch it right?
Yeah, you just throw it
I said I don't listen to rap and I said I don't listen to country, but I do listen to kid rock, but that's like two two negatives
Two negatives multiply to become a positive so as long as the rap is country or the country is rap. It's okay
Ball with the ball. He's got some soulful stuff, man
You got any any crazy lyrics from
I've been kidding but just can't get in getting something like that I keep walking
happy man.
So many toolboxes whoa you think kid rocks the guy that has it figured out
No, he's like 50 and so calls himself kid.
I'm not going to answer that question.
That's for sure.
Oh baby.
Why not a hamster tube?
Oh, what?
He's don't do, I trapped you, I trapped you.
What the hell is this?
Summon a boss.
Summon a boss.
Oh, what?
Oh.
Oh.
Oh.
Oh.
Oh.
Oh.
Oh.
Oh.
Oh.
Oh.
I
Have a 5% my bed you can I be you can I be oh my I I got launched to the next map
Now man submit this in the damn battle pass
So there's there's a there's a aggressive table over here
Nope, oh shit.
You will not hit me.
Sorry to say.
Sorry to say.
You guys, good try.
Good try.
I see her.
I see her.
I'm about to see this.
I moved.
Yeah, I got the treasure.
in the kitchen. I'm keeping her busy on the top floor. Nope. You cannot hit me. You will
not hit me. Sorry to say. Sorry to say you will not hit me. Still keeping her busy on
the top floor. Nope. You know why? Because there's a big treasure right here. What was
That's okay. I was thirsty. I was a whole house is angry at me
Let's go holy shit. We have seven treasures
I launched myself
Okay, she's coming. She's gonna
Oh god
Okay, it's in the cactus in the cactus Kate. Okay. I'm on a route. Let's go
Wait, we're all
I was cooking I was absolutely cooking I actually might have the least every taken I
Think so we popped off. Oh my god
The last treasure you found is a knee I should be number one in treasure.
That's a classic assist
What I told you where it was
Yeah, but you took it though. You took the that is
That is how my screen was you that's a banded style map. Yeah
Water shield
You know it was in the walls though because like I wouldn't be seeing Giga and other people would be like the furniture
is fucking me up and I'm like what do you mean the furniture's fucking you up
I'm chasing the hotdog right now crazy with it you guys are legendary guys I
have a legendary outfit that does look legendary
legendarily nerdy oh you're just jealous that you don't have it
excuse me all right I've got the yellow hoodie I'm chilling you don't have this
cool hat yes I've been made fun of in an online game yeah my children calling
default and nope never been made fun of her default you say something like you
sound old bro you sound like you're 25 which is actually like it hurts twice
I'll go large launch
All right, so I don't remember how to do the traps here
Wait, if you don't take that's great if you don't take jackhammer in your first chest you fucked up you fucked up
Holy cow, try to catch my high
I won't be able to.
I'll just wait until we're run out of the energy.
I got you, I got you.
Let me out.
You on guard?
That's what?
I'm invisible.
Oh my god, I see you though.
Yeah?
I see this.
I see your gloves.
That's what I'm invisible. Oh my god, I see it.
Yeah, see this. I see your gloves.
How do I? Surely I should be able to turn off the screen shake.
He's very disoriented.
Just don't get hit.
Oh, you know you press uh jump on the person or the space
You can also launch yourself when you're like that and then you yep yep she says yep. Yep. That's how I that's how I caught Pika
Oh, we were able to do three we can triple stack no we tried
Dude the screen take does go in today. Yeah dude I got it dude it's giving me a headache
Start every single round by just getting like a migraine delivered directly to my prefrontal cortex
damn you doing tricks with it
oh I should have scanned Kate and then said I found the treasure
oh man stupid stupid
lost race oh that's things
I'm in
Is Hammer good for lockpicking?
It seems to be a jack of all trades kind of option.
Do you think there's on me, y'all?
Be careful near the large lodge.
I'm in the small.
I'm breaking your ship, buddy.
Okay, okay, um, um, assault begins.
He's drowning me, he's drowning me.
He's dead at last in time.
Oh crap. I dodged it. I dodged you.
Get into your city. Get into your city.
I'm stuck.
Get into your city.
Oh, okay, okay, so he's everywhere. So he's everywhere all at once.
Okay, okay, Michelle, yo.
Guess what? I can only use that.
Nope.
okay so everything in this room is a trap all right all right now I understand
now I understand how the game over you think you can do that I don't think so
I
What the heck
Children's bedroom is clear children's bedroom is clear I
See you I see you
Oh god, I think was this one right? Yeah, I was talking the wrong thing
I've opened up a package or a passage between worlds
Oh, right.
Oh, yeah, I get you.
I think there's nothing to it.
Holy cactus cactus.
Well, what can I not go up there?
All right, motherfucker.
The furniture is following me outside.
Yeah, come on in, bro.
Come on in.
Come on in.
I got a power washer or something with your name on it.
Did you get cactus?
Did you get cactus?
Yeah, I did.
Oh my god.
The same.
I'm gonna extinguish you.
I'm gonna extinguish you.
Oh, I'm dead.
I'm dead.
I'm flattened.
Oh, where's Flamie?
Oh crap.
Can you guys on the other side?
I'm coming for you.
There's gotta be something in here.
Maybe not.
I don't know.
No!
Just trying to feel me.
Oh, wait.
Hold on.
Oh, it's gonna be a long while.
Oh, it's gonna it's gonna be a long while for me to get I die do I die for us no you
can't take the full damage
Oh my jumps are all messed up because I'm flat and oh god treasure check my jumps are
Oh my god.
Yes.
Anything in this house?
Oh.
Kate, you need the resume.
I'm in the bathroom across from you.
Bathroom.
Oh.
Oh, babe.
Oh my god, I have to open the lock.
I can't scan anything.
Oh my god.
He's coming in.
He's going in the sink.
Be careful.
Wait, did I?
No.
Oh, no.
I'm wrecking her.
Oh, no.
Oh my god, he got, he got, he got!
I got one, I got one!
He got help us, help us!
There's no help for ya!
There's no help for ya!
Something in here.
Oh no!
There has to be something in the locker room here.
We're just gonna lose, unfortunately.
Oh Chad, I'm wrecking him.
Oh, he's trying to drown me again dude, he's sick.
I'm just playing the lottery now, I'm just breaking everything.
No!
Oh, at least that was about to bonk your head,
so big guy.
What happened?
Oh, I want a reveal.
I want to run it back.
What do you mean I didn't know?
I see the treasure check?
Three treasures!
That's the most treasures in the game!
Treasure check?
It's all of them.
Have you ever seen a treasure check?
Ready up.
I'm trying out a new build.
I'm trying out a new build.
Oh, Jack, I don't know.
I think the Jackhammer goes insane.
I've never tried it.
The Jackhammer's so good for treasure.
Wait, maybe.
I can't go to the Jackhammer.
I got a new trap.
You could start with it.
You could start with the Jackhammer.
I think for that nap, the hatch is not that good.
That's the one I wanted.
Poor Giga.
She was just trapped in that room of hell.
I could not scan anything because I would get caught every time.
I'll go side steps.
I'll go side.
I got a bridge front.
What a front.
OK, I know what I'm doing on my build now.
Oh, yeah, it's kind of a build now.
When you say you say which one's good?
Jackhammer, Jackhammer's crazy.
Crazy.
I don't have Jack.
Oh, oh, I got it.
I got it. Oh, you do. You do. Oh, you can bonk on them, too.
It breaks furniture so fast.
You're my fury.
The heck is a bazooka?
Whoa, what the hell?
You don't even need to unlock the door.
Holy cow. Holy cow.
Is that the jackhammer? Drill.
I'm gonna try drill. Oh, I tried, I tried drill.
I don't know how to win.
I'm thinking jackhammer grinder. I'm feeling, I'm feeling a little crazy.
Honestly, I think a lot of guys are running that strategy these days.
Jackhammer, Jackhammer. I wanna try this.
It's a plus one grind.
Thank you, thank you.
All this?
Longest two minutes of my life.
The light is fired off.
You hear this?
The raver this?
I participate but I'm busy.
I understand.
I understand the jackhammer way.
away me when the government tells me to pay my taxes not I understand I mean I
participate but I'm busy I'm ready I'm ready for y'all you're not ready for
You guys are in the raid boss mode now
What the hell is that oh open up, bro
Yeah, that's right here here allow me
Allow me though allow me
I can't open this there's a little like a half wall that I can't get over with my
enforcer there you go okay okay perfect perfect
I got to where you guys oh god I wish I could help you
I'll be strong oh I don't think so steady I don't think so oh thanks for the
I didn't see you there, she's going agro mode
Okay, that's simply not fair he's juggling me I
Know exactly miss oh
Oh my god, I'm stupid. Why am I still in the room?
Guys, I got his aggro taken care of. Don't worry about that.
I think we all did. I think he's everywhere.
Guys, I already got four dins. Holy, okay.
I got the fellas aggro. Don't worry about that.
Nope, nope.
Ahhhh.
I think this side is clear.
I think this side is clear.
We need to go up, man.
We need to go up.
Nope, nope, nope, nope.
Okay, that doesn't work.
Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait.
Get on me. Get on top of me.
Get on top of me.
Okay, okay, I'm getting on. I'm on.
I'm on.
Wait.
Oh
Okay, there's gotta be something here under the 500 traps at once. I've been thrown out the window
He's gonna be I see him up. I see him. I see him
Sorry say you won't sorry say you won't sorry say you won't the children's Ottoman the children's Ottoman the children's the chest of drawers in the children's room
Okay, okay. Oh that this room is okay. Okay
No you won't. No you won't. No you won't.
I tanked it. I tanked it. I took that bullet for you.
Fucking shit is broken. He's setting off traps while I'm dead.
Get over here. Get over here, Sam!
I'm fucking the door! You need a res?
I need a little, I need a little something.
I'll pick me up.
I'm breaking the whole fucking room.
Sorry to say, you won't catch me.
Sorry to say, you will not catch me.
What are you doing that bed there?
I've broken your bed.
Oh, Lee.
Oh, shit, I got the gym out.
I got the gym out.
You got to go to the children's room and pick it up.
Okay, okay.
I
Is even that
You got this year I'm gonna get them
Can't move I'm just breaking the whole house. I don't give a fuck. I'm done. I dropped it. What the heck it made me drop it
Because I hate you. I hate you, dude
That's right
three jackhammers we could turn this place
he could turn the door is the door is getting the way man
got the gem. Oh baby
alright alright well that's
that's just not nice
alright I don't think there's anything in there. I think it's bottom left room
top floor so bottom left I think. Nice track kid
Oh
There's a lock here there's a lock here one more treasure y'all
You tried please please please please please you got freaking lucky man. No, not bad not bad
Okay
I kept getting I kept getting stuck on doors trying to run away, and I also don't know why it dropped that treasure when I was running away
Gem count, Gem count, please. Gem count? I think I got three.
You look crazy. Look at the gem. Look at the trepper hit.
Holy shit, she got seven treasures. Good boy.
I couldn't hit Kate at all.
I was literally hardcoreing so hard.
two of those jams are because i got stuck in the door and got hit
i just got the most insane perk
it's over for you
what is this? chaos state
of improved control
you're not ready
i honestly think i've got the greatest strategy
which is um... just
break everything in the house with a jackhammer
Yeah, that's what I was doing.
Or maybe the strat is scan and use the jackhammer to break the traps and then break all the furniture.
Okay, I gotta tell you this, the ones that attack you, the furniture that attack you cannot have jam in them.
That makes perfect sense, yeah.
Correct.
So if you remember that, oh, like, you know, this fridge attacked you, then that fridge does not have the jam.
That's a lot to remember.
I don't know if the strategy matters that much for me right here.
I'm literally going in there, I'm just breaking every piece of furniture I see.
I may not even scan.
What if I go through all my strats and just scan, scan, scan, keep moving through rooms
and scanning and not even trying to break it first.
Oh, wait a sec.
And then remembering the location of absolutely every piece of treasure.
Yep, yep.
I'll just keep it in my brain and I won't forget it.
Okay.
Not once.
I think if you want to keep one single melee weapon, screwdriver, hammer, and crowbar,
I think that's the best weapon to use to get the troffer.
Yeah.
Really?
Well, I got him with the grinder though.
Pretty good.
She grinds you.
I think grinder might be another good one.
Yeah, the way, because you can follow him with it a little better than you could ever
do.
She can follow him, I think you can send him messages.
No, no.
I'm not signing off on that one.
I don't know if I like that one.
Home is where I want to be, I'm trying a new thing, if the joke doesn't work sing
a song by the Talking Heads or maybe quote like a David Lynch movie really quick and
get him back.
It's working out.
It's working out.
Yes, it has been working.
But do we call out where we're going?
Nope.
I'm excited to see what happens.
Oh, look at that.
Look at that.
What?
Okay.
We don't need to.
Oh, that's right, I can do this.
Literally fuck your house, man.
I have never used plunger gun before.
I, to be honest with you, have no clue what it even does.
What the hell is that?
I'm assuming it shoots plunger?
Nothing here.
I'm defeated. Nope. Sorry to say you will not, you will not hit me. I'm just saying, I'm actually
insane. Alright, alright, fast travel. I found him, he's inside of this thing. Oh shit.
the furniture is rebelling oh my god guys thunder gun is literally faster than the jack hammer
that one that breaking stuff yeah
what the fuck i'm going out of space with you bro i see sin vikta
sinny's running around i got him i murdered him
that stuns for so long
I got some bottom left.
I got a cheating guys.
Alright I got two gems.
Sorry say you will not get me.
Sorry say you will not get me.
How's the bathroom looking?
Oh, something here.
I don't think there's any.
Oh there's bathroom.
Toilet, toilet.
Toilet.
Excuse me, you cannot steal my gem, Giga!
I was helping!
I was helping!
I was helping!
What the fuck, man!
This shit, this bathroom,
this bathroom is rich with treasure.
Actually, it's rich with traps,
which means there's no treasure.
He will not hit me.
How did that not hit you?
There's kids room got dumped in.
thinking. What is what is the profile pic when you're the
trapper and look like that? See that picture? Yeah. Turn it back one more
quick one. Yeah. I'll make it even quicker cuz. Oh, shit. That that is not.
Oh, that is not a good trapper house at all. Wait, what was that? Let's open that
I was popping off that one.
Cope, cope for you.
Which, what do you think is a good trap for us?
Which one do you want?
I don't know.
This is only the, what, the third map I'm playing.
There fourth.
People see how the coastal Casa goes.
I'll go square.
I'll go boulevard.
Yeah, that's why it's huge.
Oh, wait, can I change my first one thing?
I just took the wrong thing.
I can't. Can we go back?
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
I want the plunger.
Plunger was O.P.
And breaking stuff.
Yeah.
OK, let's get a plunger gun.
They're pings.
Oh, shit.
Oh, oh, oh, oh.
Hey, by the way, I got to pick up duty tonight.
Oh, Pog?
I got to take our daughter to the playground or she's going to...
Oh, that's right. That's right.
Probably kill me in my sleep if I don't take her to the playground.
Yeah, that's right.
No, for real.
She was pressed on Tuesday when we were like,
it drizzled, we can't go to the playground.
For real.
She's like her father.
She kind of catastrophizes.
Yeah, I was like, oh, the world is rolling.
When I wait for this whole day, this always happens.
Oh, god.
It's becoming a habit.
It's becoming a habit.
It's so crazy.
It is so crazy.
She said that.
I never said that to her.
Dude.
It's becoming a habit.
It's so good.
It's so good.
We have never said that to her.
So I don't even know where she goes.
That sounds like a teacher line.
line like probably a teacher saying that I used to have a teacher that would say that
any time a kid would do something bad twice they'd be like it's becoming a habit.
I didn't yell at her. I made it apparent to her that she'll get in trouble if she says
it again. Not from us but from other individuals. Oh yeah. Where's the lock? I see it. I see
it. Hey buddy, your whole house is fucked just so you know. I'm treating this shit like
Danian Bride and Walton Gargoyle treated that ladies house in season one of vice principles.
What the heck?
No ho ho ho.
What? Wait what?
I have glitched into a different room?
Oh my god they're hitting us with a
Remember treasure can be found in furniture.
Are we that bad?
Oh dude, stay back though!
Nothing there, bottom left clear.
Look at her.
I'm not shooting.
I'm not shooting.
I'm not shooting.
I'm not shooting.
Look at I'm not shoot oh
My god, he fucking flattened me now under the
I'm under the rug bro
You will not get me. This is a joke to you
I have to go back where I was I know where the gen is syndic that made me fly out
Get back room. Maybe tub maybe tub
there we are there we are there we are yes man beautiful oh oh oh oh oh what
from the sound barrier dude nope I saw you coming where you are you were you
it where you it I'll come in for you I'm crawling like he's down here he was
with me through these suburban
hold on let me open that door
what's going on
I take the free oh
what am I outside dude
what what the
what's going on in this house
oh but he's protecting the toe
be scared
I'm breaking this shit
terrified shaking
Oh, what the heck?
Yeah, literally, it should go down like that, so you know.
I'll do it, am I?
There must be something in there, but I can't really...
Oh, Sydney, come over here!
Okay, now the table.
Yeah!
you want to come out don't you but what's going on guys I'm stuck on it I bugged
out on a table I didn't take any damage so don't be mad how do you not take
damage from that I have absolutely no idea I dodged out buddy I dodged out you
You know what? I will hit this.
Watch out, y'all.
Oh my god, there's a smugness.
Oh, oh, oh.
I'm kiting, I'm kiting.
Nice, nice.
Okay.
Yeah, obviously that's not hitting me,
so I wouldn't worry about that.
Yeah, there's nothing there.
I'll just go right there.
I want the hammer.
Oh, where did you go, Barbara?
That's really bad. He got me with the corner that changed my double damage.
I'm suckin' a tornado dude.
What do you guys think about that cactus? Look at the little suss.
Get over here!
Aw!
Ah!
I got you, I got you. Help me.
Where is the last two?
in that table I'm breaking all of the shit man
he's trying hard on this upper left here there's literally no furniture
this is crazy 90% trap damage wait we're gonna lose we just need to find two
more gems finally I found one oh oh Giga oh right side of the house is mighty
safe
I'm gonna say never mind.
Oh no, no, no, no!
This will almost take damage!
Ah!
Let's go!
Oh!
What?
Oh, that was a block.
It was just a little left.
Left.
Can I see a stat?
Furniture destroyed?
Son of a- I think it's-
I broke every piece of furniture.
I broke every piece of furniture
on the right side of the house.
I'm sorry, Giger.
That's me, Pstent.
I'm sorry, Giger.
I did-
I was re-
would say I was the tank for that round. I did get Ryan with a double trap in the corner though
that was pretty good. I should have taken way more damage because you hit me with the bed once but
my collector model just glitched out and stood on top of it doing the fall animation for like a
minute and a half and I got a new trap. Is there an LG? Is there a leak for this game because I
I'm like I'm sleek with it. No trap can hit me. Well y'all it was a great day of gaming
yeah thank you thank you guys for the invite
good night y'all see ya this was fun bandit trap good friend slop by the way
the devs are watching friend slop is literally a compliment for now I'm gonna
send you over to my wife's stream I hope you've enjoyed the stream today
tomorrow it's a very similar docket I don't know what the hell we're gonna do
for three hours and then after that we're playing gamble with friends which
I think I might just I don't know Kate puts them on the schedule and I go. Yes. Yes, ma'am. Yes, ma'am
With Ludwig and Squeaks good that for now. I'll see you tomorrow later