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you
Where am I unmuted?
Oh my god, I am.
I was sitting here browsing.
I was sniffing and you all can hear my mouse clicks.
What the fuck?
It's creepy.
All right, well, I'm here.
Hey.
We clean my desk a bit.
Goodness gracious.
Yo.
That was a short song, didn't it?
So the past two days, I have gotten into path and then I got into dark and darker
for just one day.
And now I'm going to do just Saturday and play trash.
Just never quite staying in one lane.
Hey, pepper.
I need this and I need to do the lights.
I was watching old Hearthstone videos.
I don't know why, but it was nice and I enjoyed it.
Felt like I time traveled. Where's my lights?
There we go, ooh
Reckful missing lethal. Yeah. No, man. I was watching is a simpler times, you know, I don't know where hearthstone is that now, but I
Know that there's a fuck ton of weird
Cards that it's I've lost the plot. I can't follow our story. What the hell did I just do?
But it was very simple back then lose
It's rain at playing an aggro deck
simple
He's got wisps and Merlux
buffing up these one one attack minions. Yeah, there's a zealous initiate. You used to be cool soda. I used to be.
So when it dies it gives another minion plus one plus one. Do I dare hope for a hobgoblin though?
So keep in mind this video is posted by someone with a slur in their name and it's from 10 years ago.
He needs to draw into it. Yeah, if he draws a hobgoblin that's gonna be great but it's gonna be...
Almost a million views. Now you roll dice a little bit.
Play that that's where we're at. That's my alt
Yeah, I don't know who Cranich is but I guess from
Somewhere in Asia
Yeah, he's just rainets playing some rush
Paladin deck with a bunch of zero cost cards
And of course you got to switch to the bottom right it's time traveling it's great
These decks are so shit nowadays
a lot of a lot of utility if I can chat use code tempo for something decks this
girl retarded new meta when it's forcing versus Crip casted by Ben
road I'm watching this because I want to finish this game I was I started
watching before with life so I'm finishing this game and then I'll
I don't know if you trade in or just die to herapala.
I don't know if there's a plan.
I don't know if he's going to come to 1-1-2-2, but it's going to go for it.
Okay, this could be the turn. This could be the full turn.
If he could use everything in his hand and divine favor.
This is so ridiculous.
He actually can play every card in his hand.
Yeah, let's take credit for your action.
Here we go. Got it.
He's going to draw four. That's not bad.
That is really good. That is probably the most number of cards you can draw off of.
off of Secret Paladins, huh?
There is the fine favor, justifying the hold on turn one.
Well, see, everybody's clapping now.
But when Consecrate gets drawn next turn by Cranish,
I mean, OK, Secret Paladins is probably not running it,
but still.
Secret Paladins, I've got pretty greedy.
Dropped both at the...
No Consecrate.
Consecration and true silver champion, in some cases.
Shakes out.
It's it's a much simpler time when it's like your board clear was consecrated as a paladin or claim strike as a mage
Link soda I love old Hearthstone tournaments dude literally just type in
Old Hearthstone tournament GG. He's just lucky that it didn't go into the
Darken square. I was watching another one before this and he was reynad versus the maz
I think every game I've seen has been reined so far and he's just playing, he's actually
just going face every game this is good because try type the channel's name oh
yeah go ahead see how that plays out essentially a 2-2 and a quote-unquote 2-2
you know gamebods trump first frustrated by rope coach phone tap versus rain add
gamevods and I've got captain philips clips ender just full-on spoiler in the
this is a rain that special nothing anyone a fate worse than death Ziko
of course I like clean the good that's human's meat doon guy is he not board
I wasn't watching
Can you translate the cards I?
Mean if you don't know what these cards honestly, I actually don't know what any of those cards do I?
Know a few particular cards
to use the burst of kings just for some semblance of a board yeah but you're not
gonna kill them really tiny thing you're I don't know any I don't know that does
another one gives it plus four plus four right yep that's crazy I don't know
if that's always the reason it's gonna push face damage which will get punished
by blessing of kings if Rain had wants to trade well yeah yeah
And they're more like tiny thin lives. I'm really happy about that. Okay
Okay, we're going face now we love that
You know the fact that probably isn't running consecrated hilarious
I know.
It's just one of those times you're like, oh.
Spellbreaker does represent two, four less damage on the board if you use it on the shield
of mini-bot, but it's something of a consecration of looking for a good one.
Isn't this game RNG?
It wouldn't be able to play Dr. Boom this turn.
However, with...
You could be the best in the world.
...and the weapons are 15 damage represented.
Leroy Jenkins created a strategy that involved trying to defeat your opponent in one turn
without requiring any cards on the board.
board. Yeah, I think there was a meta that was a thing. But people would actually use
Leroy. Why are we watching 10 year old? Can I finish this one video please? Can y'all
leave me alone just for a second I mean in the end it means less damage coming in
Wow that's what the same action others a steward of Darkshire that doesn't like
the divine show doesn't go to the here my artistic yes the value yeah value is
It's real, but...
Right at it?
So...
God, his whole fucking board is just filled with shit.
I mean, I would say, why didn't you trade in two of your, uh...
recruits or trade in, you know, three of yours, why not?
Because the, uh, abusive sergeant's going to get...
the divine shield, and then the silver hand recruit that use you here...
It's real, I don't do suicide, it's like, for a look, for a look.
It's just...
Oh, yes.
It's time.
It's time.
It's time.
Oh, maybe not now.
I love that they're making it. These cards interact with some of the minions that play
against them. I think that makes these cards so much more usable.
I love that the steward of Darkshaw is making his board.
Tinyfin survives. One more turn.
Making his board more resilient to the non-existent concentration.
That's all that I care about, the Tinyfin staying there on the board.
Oh
Man do I keep watching our some videos to spite people now or humans meet the doom guy
Can I just say that it is an honor for me personally to see you...
Can you place Wardroor? No. I have zero interest in that.
Attention! Emergency protocols have been activated. Please exit the facility now.
We, uh, we don't know how to access his main cortex, it's all alien.
We couldn't figure it out.
We have to, uh, prepare for his careful extraction if we're given specific orders.
His life signal is barely readable.
Warning.
The fuck?
Oh, I guess now it's getting that cutscene, let's take the front one.
Is this all the cutscenes?
Am I just getting this?
It's actually him.
Oh my god, it's him.
It's actually him.
of
the
I'm serious that guy doesn't scare me. I'd like to see him try
That control block contains the energy source of the BFG 10,000
I need you to go out.
Damn, he went up real fast.
Oh my god.
Why did everything just crash okay I don't know why I just watched all that anyways
what I was gonna do today I got
messaged a bunch of games to queue
through for a shit show Saturday today
sure then tomorrow maybe I get back in
the path but today not today
Today, it looks like I'm starting with a game called Soda Man.
I think this is the only non-horror game, by the way.
Fuck it.
Soda Man, $8.
This is going to be horrible.
Horror Slop Day, pretty much.
is the plan as of now. You already try everything is a crab. Nope, I have not played that yet,
Cobalt. And it's on my to-do list. But I also have dark and darker and I also have path
of exile and I've got a horror slot. So I'm kind of cued the fuck up right now. And who
Who knows? Probably gonna throw some other shit in there too.
Good video you should check out.
Okay.
The only 7 masterpiece's ever made.
If you had to take the thousands of masterpieces we currently have and reduce them down to the lowest possible number, just 7 games, what would those 7 games be?
What games would you consider the 7 true masterpieces?
Let's get some ground rules out of the way.
First off, before you say it, no, this is not just a list of my personal favorite games.
That list is on my Patreon, which you can join to help justify spending hundreds of hours on these videos.
That's not to say this is some purely objective and perfect list.
Believe me, there's plenty of personal bias in here by virtue of me being, well, a human.
but I tried to stay as true to my methodology as I could.
This task was practically impossible, and it only got more challenging the further down
the rabbit hole I went.
Eventually, though, I was able to come up with a methodology that feels as close to accurate
as I can make it, so let's start there.
What exactly is this methodology?
How did these games make the list, and what am I prioritizing here?
Well, I've done some research on masterpieces, and narrowed it down to seven essential attributes
that make a game a true masterpiece.
Think of these less like boxes to check, and more like a single large bucket to fill.
A game doesn't necessarily require all seven attributes, it just needs enough of them together to add up and collectively reach a certain threshold.
Equally, you'll quickly see that they have a lot of overlap.
It's next to impossible for a game to max out one of these without inadvertently bleeding into another category.
Okay, the attributes are as follows.
Attribute 1. Influence.
The game needs to have some kind of a sound level if you won't agree with the list.
Probably won't.
This is often seen through direct images.
You won't agree with it, Cap?
Like Genshin Impact, Breath of the Wild, or Wild Hearts to Monster Hunter.
I already don't like any of the games so substantial that magically removing the game
from the timeline would dramatically alter what the medium looks like today.
Attribute 2.
Quality.
This is probably the most common use of the term.
The game needs to have outstanding quality next to its peers.
Simply put, a true masterpiece should be a very, very good game.
Attribute 3.
Uniqueness or novelty.
This is a weird one, but the importance of doing something new and exciting really can't
be understated.
This is where we'll really start to see these attributes blend together, as often times
the most unique games also tend to be some of the most influential if they're successful enough.
Attribute 4. Timelessness. A masterpiece shouldn't really age all that much. Sure, tech gets better,
that's inevitable, yet a masterpiece from 30 years ago should still be a fun game today.
Attribute 5. Impact. While influence is more about copying and taking clear inspiration from
something, impact represents some kind of paradigm shift that was directly caused by the release of
that game. Kong for example has relatively low influence, but arguably the highest impact of
any video game by virtue of being the first. Attribute 6. Universality. Anyone from any
background should be able to immediately appreciate why this game is special. It's not just great
for Jare and G-Pans- I bet he'd chat to G-P-T this. It's something that practically anyone who's
ever touched a video game can look at and go, yeah, I can see why people would like that. It's so
important when I show this image on screen, basically everyone knows I'm about to beg for subs
because I want a cool slab of metal. Finally, attribute 7. Legacy. A game's story, how it was
Remembered and how it continues to impact us decades later creates a lasting legacy that only a true masterpiece can have
This is perhaps the most nebulous of all the attributes. Oh, I hear the fucking game has a channel a remarkable legacy
It's probably a result of maxing out at least a few of those other categories with all of that out of the way
Let's start with the very first game the one that stars arguably the most iconic character in gaming
So check this out the year is 1985 and gaming is for lack of a better word
Dragon Quest 1's future was uncertain to say the least.
Despite all the doom and gloom though, situations like these often leave the door wide open
for a new challenger to approach and shake things up, which is exactly what a friendly
plumber was getting ready to do.
Wouldn't Alone in the Dark have an insane fucking impact then?
Considering it like, wasn't that the inspiration for Resident Evil?
And this console wouldn't have done nearly as well if it wasn't for the game's spearheading
its launch.
The first of our seven true masterpieces, Super Mario Bros.
Now if I may ask you for a moment to consider a question that I promised you was relevant,
just give me a chance to explain.
I'd like to take a moment to analyze the conventional attractiveness of Mario.
Wait, wait, hold on, let me explain.
Mario isn't ugly by any means, but he's no Leon S. Kennedy or Samus Iran or Izan Bruteli
Major Hulkenberg.
He's kinda just a guy.
I mean, he's even shorter than his own younger brother.
While he may be THE jump man, he doesn't exactly look like he's been working out in
the same gym as Leon.
That's exactly it though.
In an article from 2015, the writer Will Parton brings up this brilliant idea that
I think is extremely important when discussing the impact of both this game and especially
its main character.
Mario is just a guy.
The average person might struggle to relate to the walking Greek statue that is Leon S.
Kennedy, but Mario is short and a little round.
A figure that I'd imagine isn't exactly difficult to measure up to.
Equally, he lacked some more complex backstory or deepened intricate motivations and goals.
He simply wants to get to the castle and save his partner from an evil villain.
All of this creates something profoundly significant that would shape one of the most important
parts of gaming even 40 years later, an avatar.
The original Mario Bros showed us that it's possible to take the player on an adventure
where they had a character that acted as their avatar in this world.
This idea would be expanded upon in the following decades with iconic heroes like Master Chief.
You never see the face behind the mask, perhaps because that face is meant to be your own.
What I believe was the greatest strength of this game, however, was its genius game design.
The first level has been dissected and worked closely with the character for years, but
there's good reason for that.
The first Goomba teaches you how to jump.
These blocks show you that there's a difference between normal blocks and question blocks.
They also teach you that small Mario can't break the blocks, but super Mario can.
This pipe is positioned in such a way that the mushroom will bounce off of it, teaching
you the physics of this power-up and giving newer players a chance to grab it without
having to chase it down.
I could keep going, but you'll probably get it.
His ability to teach the player without tutorials or guidebooks was so innovative and effective
that it's still a crucial part of most great games today.
For example, Elden Ring doesn't have a tutorial telling you not to fight every boss you encounter,
yet it does have a crazy powerful boss right outside of the starting area, along with a
safe spot within running distance.
This acts like a way to teach the player that if a boss seems too powerful, they can simply
run away.
That type of game design comes directly from Mario 1.
It was breaking the mold and doing things no one had ever thought to do, and for that
reason, it's probably the most influential game on this list. I'm not gonna sit here
and claim that avatars wouldn't exist, nobody would've ever figured out invisible tutorials,
or even that the entire medium would've fizzled out in the 80s without this one game. And
even if that were true, there's no real way to know. What I can tell you, however, is
that this one game from close to 50 years ago was so impactful, so world changing and
so influential that we still clearly see it's the 80s and 80s games. And with one of the
first video games, it had to be! Mario is, at worst, the second or third most iconic
And this was his debut title Nintendo has been one of the largest gaming companies on the planet since the 80s and still remains
I mean it's really getting clear that it's gonna be Mario, but which Mario?
This one?
Are we just gonna fucking spam like
Hello?
That probably doesn't happen without Mario 1
Let's rewind about 18 months to find our second masterpiece before we leave the 80s
So Mario 1, we're just gonna be in the 80s
Pure fuck it. Put tetris on there. Wolfenstein Zelda all seven of those attributes fucking. I don't know what else
Well, it's all Pokemon fire falling block puzzle genre, which is called a day popular mobile games like candy pack man
And on top of that it's pause timeless games ever made. They did it releasing in 19 for the game was so
Actually, what was first do more often aged a while?
It wasn't the very first video game ever made its level of
Exciting the ceiling for skill in such a simple package do I was against from the modern era
Crucially, that simple package allows it to be understood, appreciated, and understand
that you could know what else could be.
He actually chose-
Next, let's move on to one that might be a p*** successfully today.
Fortnite just had a generational run down over eight years of global dominance.
People have been playing Tetris for over 40.
If that's not timeless, I'm honestly not sure what else could be.
Next let's move on to one that might be a bit more controversial.
However, I think as we delve deeper into this game, you'll start to see just how monumentally
It was and really still is if you were born between here and here
I'm willing to bet that one of the first video games you ever played was the first generation of Pokemon red and blue
If Mario show had video games and cells you knew it, Pokemon demonstrated this median's ability to expand far beyond its home in addition to-
I didn't play this shit!
You guys were novel and revolutionary and never played Pokemon related, didn't get into it.
What was all the fouchin' sinky people?
Okay, skip board, don't care, great.
Well the first were the ones that revolutionized NEARLY the first ones to do it.
It would instead be more hack-
Oh, what, maybe not?
I'm letting innovation on display here.
It popularized Z-Targeting, a camera system that we still use today.
It's really hard to appreciate just how incredible that is.
Okay, so Ocarina of Time.
The timeless tools, techniques, despite TV games,
and this going from nearly, arguably, even more impressive.
The game is basically the quintessential hero's journey.
It takes this weird outcast kid who acts like a bit of a blank slate.
Is this game timeless, though?
I don't know if it is.
Like, sure, nostalgia, I'll go back and play it.
People have been speedrunning it, but if you took all that away...
I don't know.
I don't think it'd be fun much like Mario from the 80s sends him into a tree
I've gone back and played all the style to games so many times and Morris
He's called home for his whole life and I start taking the style to it. I don't know it is great
You're just coping claustrophobic cage. You finally make your way out and are met with this
I mean the music is great. I
Cannot begin to imagine how this must have felt at the time
I'm sure you remember your first moment like this from a video game if you're around my age
Maybe it was Skyrim you exited that cave at the start of the game
Adrenaline finally leaving your system after the dragon attack and in front of you lay a scene straight out of a painting endless peaks dotting the horizon
Never cared about skyrim of those distant locales that you could barely make out may hide an adventure exactly like the one that you just escaped
It was nothing short of breathtaking all inspiring even overwhelming
Maybe it should have been Skyrim yet
I can't help but wonder what it must have been like for those players back in the 90s players who had grown so accustomed to games
That looked like this this or this we want that it comes to the games flashes of what a 3D world could look like at a time
Where worlds like these were practically non-existent ocarina of time might have been the very best more than anything
Everything was new out difference between what was then and what is now the
And is a large reason why it's as popular as it is today, it's a fantastic west, the brilliance of both 3D models and pre-rendered backgrounds to display these larger-than-life vistas made out of a world that felt more grandiose and extraordinary than anything anyone had ever seen before.
Holy shit, it looks awful, wait.
is this like the actual hub I see these fuckers like walking way it actually
looks like the was like the one punch man modeling where the guy just slides
down I'm talking about it was extraordinary than anything anyone had
ever seen before and I guess how do you do it showed the industry that with the
right technology games didn't have to be mere pixels on the screen they could
look and feel like movies are larger more cinematic productions simply
We compared this to the Mario games from barely over a decade prior, and you can really start
to get a sense of the scale here.
To put this gap into perspective, if you were born in 1980, you could have played Super
Mario Bros. in elementary school, and this in college.
It wasn't merely reinventing the medium as a whole, though.
On a smaller level, it was totally changing JRPGs, and of course, its own series.
It was the first fully 3D Final Fantasy game with these unbelievable animations and cutscenes,
both of which it utilized for their fullest potential to tell one of the most iconic stories
in gaming, one that still feels relevant even today.
While games like Prono Trigger and Final Fantasy 6 effectively mastered the genre and what
it could offer with the technology available back then, the Final Fantasy 7 acted as that
next major step, a generational leap that gave us a window into what the future could
look like for this medium.
Perhaps directly because of all of this, Final Fantasy 7 and the characters from it
remain the most recognizable in the series by far.
Cloud is effectively the poster boy of Final Fantasy, even going as far as representing
it in Smash Bros. And when they thought to add another Final Fantasy character to that
series, did they add the main character of 10?
Final Fantasy 6?
Maybe one?
Nope.
They added Sephiroth, a second Final Fantasy 7 character.
Despite being created nearly two decades ago, these remain the most iconic characters
in the series, and it's all because of Final Fantasy 7's success.
This game is the very definition of- Dude, I was watching Love on the Spectrum or whatever,
And there was this one guy and he was like trying to find a girlfriend or whatever.
And his family was giving him shit because he had a fake girlfriend or whatever.
His current girlfriend was Tifa.
Tifa from Final Fantasy?
You know what I'm talking about?
It was like, don't talk about her.
We don't talk about her anymore.
She's not real.
But before that, before he went on the show, this is his girlfriend.
He's got good taste.
You know, TBH.
Out of all the selections online, it's not a bad pick, or that reason we'll consider
it our fourth true masterpiece.
No, that's not right either.
Okay, let's try this.
All three of the games we've covered so far have prioritized impact and influence over
practically anything else.
So for number four on our list, I wanted to take a look at a game that acts like the
pinnacle of the genre, a game that stands at the absolute peak of quality.
I'm not saying this game is perfect, but as of today, it might be the best open world
game of all time.
Okay, I was going to say, no, Celeste is not-
I don't know how the world gets this feeling, but sometimes, rarely, I'll be playing a game
and almost start excitedly laughing like a child.
That excitement comes from the conflict actively occurring in my head as I play the game.
One half of me, the pragmatic half, is going to be-
Does Elden Ring the beat?
Because, to be honest, it deserves to be on the list more than half of us, so at some
point.
Alien games do exist, but statistically speaking, this probably isn't one of them, so just enjoy
it for what it is and keep your expectations in check.
While the other half is going, okay, yeah, no, you're right.
I mean, Lim Grave is probably just 40-50% of the map and...
Holy shit, it's this feeling of there's no possible way the game can keep doing this.
It doesn't make sense.
How does a game have an open world this big while still keeping it as dense as it is,
with massive dungeons, some of which you don't even have to complete to beat the game, and
combat that's also some of the best in the industry.
That's not supposed to be possible, yet somehow they did manage to pull it off.
And it's because Elden Ring is almost like a culmination of everything we've learned
about Open World since Zelda 1.
Elden Ring director Hidateki Miyazaki said in an interview that he learned from Breath
of the Wild, Skyrim, Oblivion, and Witcher 3.
They studied everything that made these games great, scrutinized and addressed their shortcomings,
and did what every great game has done over the past 15 years.
Evolved the medium and pushed it forward.
like many of the greats before it Elden Ring likely won't be the greatest open
world game of all time I'm trying to think of how I can just agree with this
said that Elden Ring isn't his ideal fantasy RPG it's close but he knows
they can do better and I'm sure in time the team at From Soft will when they do
though what does that mean for Elden Ring what does it mean for Breath of the
Wild yeah I don't know maybe it could be a lesson I don't know what does it mean for
any game that you don't play good games you can imagine a world in which Miyazaki
Rocky does create his ideal fantasy RPG.
Let's say it's another open world like Elden Ring.
Is Elden Ring no longer one of the seven true masterpieces?
By that logic, should Mario 1 be on this list when Mario World exists?
I'm honestly not sure.
Can I ask you a seemingly straightforward question that has no real answer?
When humanity is long gone and aliens stumble across our planet, they'll likely categorize
all of our trinkets, odds and ends, those sorts of things.
So when they reach the video game section, what do you think they'll consider more important?
The very first game humanity made?
Or the very last?
This question is almost a bit of a paradox.
If you ask me, I'd say the last game is infinitely more important, especially if it was the last
truly great game and not just some shovelware that an AI threw out at the last second before
shutting down.
A game like that would be able to save so much through its sheer existence alone.
Every choice it makes would be a statement on what we valued at the very end, what kind
of Mark we wanted to leave behind, what we wanted the future to know about us.
Who we were, the last we knew, the kind of who we just far and wide, we needed our civilization
to follow.
Yet the first game is the very reason the last game is even able to exist.
Sure, Pong isn't some grand, boss-office-adventurous species in their final moments, but it is
the starting point, the necessary first domino that had to fall.
To be honest with you, this paradox drove me crazy when trying to put together this
list.
legacy and quality feels next to impossible I'd go to bed one night with my
completed list of seven week was losing sleep up the next day look at it and go
yeah no at least half of this is wrong we have to go back to the drawing board
and again and again and again I'd get a finished script yet almost the very
instant I hit enter on that last line of the seventh entry it all felt wrong I
think I finally understand why though along with how to finally get it right
See, there are two reasons. First off, the simple reason is the sheer complexity of the task.
This list lasts really long.
There's so much.
Let's see your list, bro.
General.
In 3...
Come on.
There's gotta be like, at the end.
A true masterpiece.
I feel it part.
Minecraft.
The highest...
So this fucker put Minecraft...
Oh, he put World of Warcraft on there?
Okay, so hold on. We got Zelda...
Mario...
Pokemon, Tetris, World of Warcraft, Doom, and Minecraft, I guess is what the tree numbers are.
Here we go.
Huh.
Didn't he have Elden Ring on here too? Where's Elden Ring?
I thought he put that on here.
7.
The Last Masterpiece, Minecraft.
The highest selling video game-
Huh.
Go to the Warcraft section- oh I overhear him gas up World of Warcraft?
Shadow Colossus?
The game independent of the context of its release, especially when works of art are
a direct result of the world around them.
This isn't even taking into account subjectivity either.
I sincerely believe there are at least 50-
No, no, that's not-
We'll consider it for-
This motherfucker's got-
Like, he's actually has different lists!
Fourth true masterpiece.
What?!
No, no, that's not right either.
Okay, let's- let's try this.
All three of the games we've covered so far-
We-
We-
We-
We-
We-
We-
We-
We-
We-
We-
We-
We-
We-
We-
We-
We-
We-
We-
We-
We-
We-
We-
Okay, so the man opening the game
Did even talk about what I do
But he did get to put the best motion pack of video games of all time in his title he did get to do that
So the man
Okay, well, I'll tapped
Oh
Nice maximized window love that for me
I need to get a drink.
Boy, he's a good boy.
I
Speaking their IP? Ah yes. Uh is this? What language am I in? Hello? Speel? Oh fuck,
What did I do?
Wait.
I can see it.
Again.
Whoa.
A schnitzel.
I'm playing a new game.
Space agents emerge as Earth's first and only line of defense against the ultimate threat.
A soda man didn't know it yet, but he was about to change the fate of the universe.
Once a cyber thief, a biker, a womanizer, but most importantly, a soda addict, he found
himself thrust into a war unlike any other.
He had fought in countless battles in the space agents.
Why would this one be different?
But it was.
That's where the game down just a wee bit more.
Okay, move around you can adjust your ammo since we have some options, it's fine.
Oh, those teammates.
Okay, reload with R.
Okay, you can always toggle automations, auto attack.
Eh, that's fine.
Okay, one more dash here.
Here we go.
Where's my dash CD?
Oh no
he was already the best there was now he was unstoppable a god walking among men
under his soda-powered leadership they won a thousand battles that's crazy
only one enemy remained the commander
and so the man succeeded
in the sunset of his glory with a soda in hand. He retired.
Wolf report. Oh
Life was perfect for 15 years
Until that damn day the soda calypse
The sodas lost their fizz, and no more.
His world came crumbling down, blinded by vengeance.
He swore that whoever was responsible would pay.
Somewhere out there, sodas still existed.
And he would find them, and take his revenge.
Okay, let's get B.
Alright, Soda Man.
no skip you can't have that
uh... hey buddy
opens a soda pop nice
develops a man as four childhood friends why because one of us managed to quit
smoking only become addicted to soda instead
without building a reverse around this would be cool and hilarious and here we
are
love that
so once we talk with all four people
old friend how's your new cybernetic liver holding up let me know if you need
more upgrades like the old days huh it's been a while okay that's one of them
Kate figured your weapons could use some improvement hope you don't mind a
little feminine touch the FACT huh straightforward enough fully automatic
cap thrower. It's an automatic rifle. Reliable. No frills. Good for starting out, but don't
get too attached.
Standard and effective. It gets the job done. I'll take it.
Soda man, we learned the cause of the soda collapse.
Who?
More like what? The space agents named it Entity X. We don't know what it is yet. All we know
He is the reason for the sodas losing the fizz and he's raising an army in the star system raising an army
Huh the commander did the same
I'll end this entity x or whatever the number its name is
Just like I did to the commander and get my sodas back
We don't know where it is yet, but I'll be searching like Admiral said first
You need to get down to crystal heaven and collect sodas for your powers the space agents ship must have taken damage from the planet
be prepared for anything anything comes between me and my sodas i destroy
so cool
who the fuck oh admiral this bitch soda man the space agents were collecting sodas after the soda
calypse there is a planet below called crystal heaven it looks like some of the sodas they found
are down there. The ship is in the star system somewhere, though not located yet. While you
collect the sodas scattered all over the planet, we will find the ship. So finish crystal heaven
and we'll proceed with the next planet with the sodas. Okay, go to admiral for operations, R.
crystal heaven risk level one I guess crystals go burr please turn the game
up do quiet
we'll go I was at 20 we'll go to 30 okay find the circle
What is happening?
Oh, okay.
Well, I know what this game is.
Here is your soda selection panel.
You will always see this screen after leveling up or picking up a soda, blah, blah, blah.
There are two types of sodas, normal and ultimate.
Total sodas can be enhanced to a certain level of their rarity, or their rarity can be increased.
A soda can come with a high rarity level, but it starts at level 1 when purchased.
Ultimate sodas cannot be enhanced, but are already quite powerful.
Most ultimate sodas can be included in soda sets.
Sodas have different max levels, there are only 5 rarity levels in total.
The rarity levels are common rare, epic legendary, and artifact.
Alright, it's all pretty basic.
Let's see here.
So we can take Hop Shoe, Bubbly Plague, or Bubble Turret.
Hmm.
So I can spread virus to enemies on hit, bullets have a chance to make enemies
sneeze, scattering projectiles around them that deal damage and can apply
something called virus.
And then this one also does virus.
Summon stationary turrets that blow bubbles.
Well, this one's epic.
So...
Your attacks deal more damage and do plague.
I think it's very much like Hades. Yes, it is.
If you look on the left, you're only allowed to have one in each of these slots.
So, my auto attacks are now going to be virus.
I'm locking that in.
So...
Let's crush him.
Find the circle.
I mean, I'm going towards this exclamation point.
I should probably be looting these guys.
Ow, fuck.
Move cam. Oh, shit. You're right. I do need to
top left
Okay, after making attacks for a certain amount, you call lightning
Hmm
This would be my auto attack
Your strike steal more damage
The passive
could reroll yeah I just don't know what else in the game fucking let's reroll
see what's else okay your strikes just deal more damage
it's more spark bullshit whenever you reload call lightning strikes at random
enemies it's all lightning reroll again
shit
You throw a disc of electric to the nearest enemy, dealing damage and creating a chain
lightning with set intervals.
Fuck, I should have went lightning build.
I re-rolled again.
I should have started banishing too.
Electricuted lightning.
It's all lightning.
Am I locked into lightning then?
Whatever.
I don't think it is.
I don't level up.
Okay, this is your attacks.
Knock enemies back and deal more damage and apply bleeding.
Well, I would lose my toxic, which it's wasted.
Your dash creates a Kasura Gami.
The fuck does that mean?
You can use your secret technique of Death Kick
to kick enemies nearby, dealing damage and knocking them back.
All right, let's take this.
How do I use this?
How do I use my kick?
Cool down 4.4 seconds.
How do I use it?
F-R-E?
Z?
I hit Z and it did something, X?
Oh, maybe it just autos.
might be a half it just auto goes I think damn oh my god is owning okay I can upgrade my
death kick increase your attack damage based on your missing health no I think I just upgrade
got the cake. Okay, I got to do this quest. How do I do this?
If they're not registered, they're unpredictable.
Ow.
Unpredictable?
That's another statement.
Look at those energy blasts.
I wonder if I can make guns out of them.
Okay, what does upgrade my virus, I guess?
Ow.
Ow, I'm actually getting owned.
actually getting owned. On hit bullets have a chance to make enemies sneeze. I don't have
anything here do I dying enemies may drop why pops cool I was using grants
you temporary moving speed all right fuck it we'll take my pops I guess
Oh, they're healing soon, we love that.
Oh, ow.
Gain a damaging aura around, how do I see what I have?
Oh, here we go.
So I have a white, red, blue, and white.
So I don't have this spark, gain a damaging aura around you.
It's garlic essentially.
Either that or upgrade my lollipops.
I don't know if I want to gain a damaging aura around me, I don't think that's as fun.
I already have the depth kit.
You playing P.O.E.?
Nope.
Not today.
What the fuck is that?
I still also don't know what the fuck I'm supposed to be doing on the map here.
Find the circle and protect the circle for 30 seconds. Where is the fucking circle?
Is this not it?
Oh wait, enemies in area.
Oh, the timer.
The camera's fucking covering it.
Look.
There we go.
Ow.
Oh my god.
Okay, gain a damage or around you, quote on, you release an energy that deals damage.
I already have a blue.
Jesus.
Killing an enemy grants you base attack damage and base health regen for a limited amount of time.
This bonus can be stacked.
I already have a passive. Upgrade death kick.
Protect the circle for 12 more seconds.
I'm back to zero now.
Oh my god.
You are resetting it. Yeah, I am. Time to fucking move!
I did it.
Your strike's doing more damage.
I really hate that it doesn't show what I do and do not have.
I mean, do I replace my basic attack and go deep into lightning?
I feel like Bubbly Plague sucks.
Does it actually replace it?
It absolutely does.
Press E.
alteration what did you just do
Okay, there's something here.
Survive for 15 minutes.
No?
This is a card chest panel.
You'll see this panel.
You can open a card chest.
Okay, I'm not reading all that
16% spark damage or 22% soda damage
The fuck is soda damage
Just passives in general
Damage from soda, but everything is kind of soda isn't it?
huh increase the damage from all your sodas except passive sodas which can take soda damage
I guess.
Tepik.
Shirley.
F2 apply.
Okay.
I mean right now everything just dies in literally like just one hit.
don't need a yellow and a purple. Red eyes. You're summoning a gargoyle that continuously
deals damage to your enemy by shooting lasers from its eyes. As a gargoyle kills enemies,
it heals you. Okay, fuck it.
this wait you're telling me this is my friend okay lose a random soda but earn a
card with at minimum epic rarity lose a random card upgrade a random soda to
legendary minus 10 coin earn a random car I don't even know if I have coins I
guess I did okay
amazing
I don't really think I care about this gargoyle at all.
Bro is addicted to any game. I don't know how he likes playing boring stuff. Are you
trying to continue it? I'm addicted to this game right now. Yes, I've been playing it
for about 15 minutes so far. That's a thought. Rare cards grant 15% global damage each.
You gain 10% attack damage as bonuses multiplied by the level of soda with the highest level
you own. Okay, sure. So I have like a level 3 soda, so shouldn't that be 30% damage?
or 40% rather.
Okay fuck, this is a lot, how on earth?
How is okay
Well
There's a boss here
good death kick blood pack
I still need a yellow
I'm gonna re-roll, no yellow, sad
That's a great death kick I guess.
I actually don't get... everything's just dying like in one hit from death kick I think.
Is there a boss loot?
Ah fuck of course there was, not bad.
Why is it not on the map?
Still no yellow.
Was there boss loot?
They kinda just died by just being near my presence.
Why even shoot the gun?
Okay, magazine size leveling up against fire rate for 40 seconds, let's do magazine size call of the day.
I don't think I could land a shot if I tried.
They died just instantly.
How much longer till I win?
Is there a timer?
It just says 15 minutes, but I don't know how long I've been in here for.
Uh, oh I see.
635.
So I got, what, 8 more minutes here?
Okay, boss?
Might actually press buttons here.
Ooh, a magnet.
You found a blueprint.
Okay.
How do I take this magnet?
Oh, okay, it worked.
I don't have a dash yet forming a dash creates two rods connected by chain lightning interesting
Is there a different passives your dash charges increase, okay, I guess we'll take that
I
Replaced my other passive under what whoa hold on what?
Multiple passives
Where does this is a yellow where's yellows
I really want to try and take more thingamajigs, but I don't want to replace stuff.
I don't think it does though.
Reload ball lightning strikes randomly. Okay, we take that
Minus review exit F8 whenever you real eight times while holding this card gain permanent point one lifesteal
Unhit plus 50 max HP when you reroll eight times
Okay, I'll just have to reroll a lot need two more rerolls
How is this loot still coming? Jesus. Alright, so... but I have zero re-rolls. Yikes.
five
Lock, okay.
During the duration of your reload, you gain a damage mitigating blood shield.
Oh, okay, so I can only have one here, got it.
It warned me before I took it.
There's a pre-death kick then.
Okay, so I can have multiple strikes.
I feel like you already wanted to just here kick. Yeah.
I'm also just not really even caring that much.
Feeling addicted? Yep. You know me. Sometimes a blueprint.
2% soda efficiency, oh wow.
5% project, I'm just grabbing all the question marks on the map.
Never mind, map is massive, Jesus.
five minutes left
valley after this? It is! I'm pumping it up.
Found a blueprint. Okie-dokie.
How everything is literally just dying.
It doesn't even make it onto my screen for I credit for $6700.
enemies sit with virus phase and low health suffer and a heart attack and are
instantly executed
I don't care. How do I? Hello? Apply. You can re-roll that? Yeah, I just don't care.
I don't give a shit, it doesn't matter.
Okay, now they're all being executed.
Not much of a difference, there's just more letters on the screen now, signifying that
they instantly died.
This game sucks. I'm not into it, but, you know, maybe it'll get good.
I'm gonna finish this run.
See if there's like a final boss or something, and then yeah, that's it.
That's game.
Three minutes to go.
Hmm, is it a masterpiece? Yep
Whoa
It's happening
If you play space backpack battles, you know, I haven't even seen that in a meeting.
Sandwich?
Try them out, Sandwich.
They're getting closer.
You might like space backpack battles, but probably would, if the game actually had
I have some level of depth to it.
Okay, I looped this shit up here for this hook.
Wow.
Oh shit.
I don't even know if I want to be grabbing these anymore.
Ugh, just upgrades I don't need.
Down with the ship.
It's down with the ship?
Okay.
Oh, hold on.
Hold on.
things are hitting me I just got hit it's a miracle final minute okay never
mind I think it was a fluke
come out of it a fluke
Let's upgrade my lollipops.
Ooh, alright, boss time.
I won.
Why?
Why are we even leveling up, isn't it over?
I guess 30 seconds left.
Five seconds.
I did it.
Complete ace in a whole mission.
Defeat the final threat.
Okay, who's the final threat?
Hello? Is it Diabetes?
on the map. There's a bunch of red balls though, they're dying instantly. I think it's optional
by the way. How does one defeat the final threat? What am I going to do? Top? Ooh, maybe
actually yeah like some weird icon here I think is where I spawned but maybe
the process no
out of Ford okay well that was the first game on both list next one was the
broken vow I think we're going into the whore slot so we're playing trash for the whole day
please be on steam
it is absolutely not on steam
really
Maybe they have a link here.
The broken vow.
Okay, it's on some random ass janky website.
We love that.
Itchio.
Sure.
Download.
Ah.
Mm-mm-mm-mm-mm.
Hmm.
Yeah, the box of fear. Windows cannot open the folder. What?
Is this the wrong game? Oh my god, I'm downloading the wrong fucking game, I think.
Here we go.
Okay, on the game website, he's like,
check out my other games.
And it had a download now.
I'll show you all.
It kind of baited me a bit.
On the website here, I was looking for the download,
and then, oh, download now, right here.
was his fucking his other game. Here's the download I wanted to go to.
Okay.
Alright, new folder.
All right, English, it's very quiet.
Mal since Chavity I bet I'm gonna want to lower it usually I do new game
I miss prime soda optimus prime
Okay with sprint with space bar
Everything he did to me won't be forgotten he may think he got away, but he's mistaken
But how much time passes I
I will repay him in kind. What are you? Okay. Didn't your grandpodges die or something? What's going on?
Just a minute dear. I'm just finishing getting dressed just a minute dear. Okay
who big lighter
i need to replace the circuit breaker when the power goes out she becomes more
aggressive as if she's lurking waiting for the right moment
okay is grandma gonna be a
The game is extremely loud by the way.
I normally play games at 20% volume, it's at 75.
Too hot to handle with your hands.
Okay.
I mean, there's a lot of things I could run in an oven mitt, tongs, okay.
I'm also way faster going back.
Here it comes.
Okay, it wasn't bad.
Hello?
Grandma, oh fuck. I don't know why I got scared something scared me there
These medication that he gives me are slowly destroying me. I feel worse with every dose. I won't let this happen
I'll make him taste his own poison
Okay, I
Don't remember grandma taking so many meds
acquired memory one out of five
okay that's baffling to put this in your fucking bedroom not to open well I'm
gonna open that that's also batshit crazy okay screwdriver and crowbar
nice. Power goes out. It's going to go out while I'm in this room. Grandma had this book
at the funeral some type of necromancy book crowbar screwdriver
Oh, how are we going to go out?
No.
And now.
It's not good, it's rather extremely unfortunate.
He locked me in here believing that I wouldn't be able to escape.
Little did he know that his own trap would turn against him.
Okay.
Press shift to run.
Why are we teaching me how to run?
Oh.
I need to see how grandma's doing motherfucker. I have scoured every room in this house. She's not here you fucking imbecile
What am I even looking for in here? I don't even know what I want at this point.
I keep thinking these little boxes are like shotgun ammo from Resident Evil. Oh, nice.
Oh
Trolling
But how do I do this
Oh, it opened.
You fucking serial.
Okay.
I survived now get back on the generator oh my god it was her it was her it was her
Oh my god, she killed him
If the medications fail the plan B is in the books blue red green it's painful to think about I've come to this point
I hope I won't need it. Okay, don't look behind the picture
The other there's like eight six one
Blue red green eight six one behind the picture
They seem so happy I understand but like how do we look behind this thing?
Maybe there's another picture somewhere... for Jesus Christ.
I'm dead.
That's crazy.
I mean, how on earth?
I mean how on earth I have to pull her way back we got a loop around this room
Okay, so that's done, that's nice I guess.
What I'm doing isn't right, I know she suspects me, I can see it in her silence but there's
no turning back.
Or is there?
No, I can't stop now.
Insane.
Hmm. I don't know what to do. Maybe I go back to the picture, maybe I can interact with
it now or something? Not what I expected. Okay, so it's a save combination.
So, seven left, seven, nine, three, okay, seven, seven, nine, three, seven, nine, three,
Okay, make sure we get this before I open objective leave the house well after the box
sent that book everything changed I tried to talk to her but it's not her anymore I
I tried to destroy the book, but that only made her more aggressive.
I'm afraid of what she might do to our children and grandchildren.
I'll have to take action. I'll try to poison her slowly.
If nothing else works, I have a gun in the safe and I'll do whatever it takes.
Only four out of five memories. What? I'm missing one.
How did that take so long to shoot what
What?
Oh, fuck.
But it worked all of a sudden.
Is she gonna spam spawn?
I don't like this.
Where did she go?
Excellent. A masterpiece, really. Alright, next game. We've got the Alley. This game
Steam is on Steam.
2026?
It seems to be a demo.
Fuck it.
We play the demo.
Time to go pee.
You
Beach mouse beach beach mouse
Mouse, Mouse, Beech, Beech, Mouse.
Uh-oh.
Beech, Beech, Beech, Beech, Mouse.
No, sir.
Mouse, Beech, Beech, Mouse.
Skip.
Cease.
Beech, Mouse, Beech, Beech, Mouse.
Freaks, man.
This is the five dollars.
Appreciate that, wow.
Hopefully it was worth it.
I couldn't start, okay, huh.
Why is it blocking it?
Repair it?
Uh, properties, verifying integrity, no fucking no.
What is this?
firewall blocked the game how do I unblock that I don't know how to work
firewall at all
you don't why would you want to I mean I don't know it's a game on Steam
I need to add it to the exceptions.
Go into files, run with admin rights.
Okay.
Let's call it again, the alley is to do, okay, let's see what happens here.
Oh, and it's so cooked.
Hmm. Yeah, I don't know. I do not know. Well, game next, our next game is the exit eight.
The exit eight. Also on steam also cost money. Wait, this is that one movie. I saw this movie.
I think I played this game even.
Maybe I haven't.
Huh.
okay no way you watched Lyric play it or no way you just watched Lyric play it
because your name is I watched Lyric
just go around is accusing everyone you just watched Lyric play didn't you
that's funny I played there was one game I played it's very similar to the
concept of this game, where like you're going up some stairs or something?
Oh, and you got to like find what's wrong before you move on, but it was like a hundred floors.
So if there's anything I know, the goal is to find something that is wrong in the hallway.
So we're going to move forward, move forward, and then bang, same exact hallway, but something's
going to be different.
Or if there's nothing different, then I move forward.
If there is, I turn around.
It's usually something really obvious.
I don't think there's shit.
how do i know if i get it right or wrong? i actually don't know
the number changes
where? what number?
this just says exodate this way
when you go forward or back it'll say a new number on the wall
Oh, here we go.
Zero.
Now the game starts.
So it hasn't even started yet.
That's why.
i know he's like supposed to be standing behind me at one point
i'm looking at door knobs i'm looking at the lights i'm looking at the eyes on
these fuckers
i don't think anything's wrong
Yep, nice, there was no anomaly.
This guy's gonna be standing behind me now?
No?
No, nothing, okay, moving on.
Didn't count the tiles.
There was a fucking anomaly?
What?
Okay.
Okay, so there is no anomaly there.
I wonder if it's all static. Like floor one is always the same anomaly or no anomaly.
Or I wonder if it's dynamic. I have no idea.
So this is where I...
Two vents, chance. Aren't there supposed to be two vents, motherfucker?
Extra door, there's already three doors.
Stealing is different, no it's not.
I don't... concourse?
Exit 8?
Okay, there is no anomaly.
We're chillin'.
Okay.
I mean...
obvious. So I go back, now I'm at three.
That's not normal.
Okay, exit four.
Okay, normalize pictures.
Everything's looking good there. The lights look good. The doors look...
Where's the third door?
Minus one door.
Wait... Did I fuck up? Am I back at zero?
I fucked up.
Okay, floor one.
Nice floor two.
Damn, I got some stamina I'm owning.
Posters look normal, triple door, no middle door knob, bullshit, lights are fine, he's
not following me.
No anomaly, or was.
Damn.
Thank you.
No anomaly. I don't see it. Nice. Okay, I bet there's going to be an anomaly here.
Let me take my time. Three doors, two vents. There are lots of pictures, and they seem...
Okay, that was an anomaly.
Triple door, double vent, pictures seem fine.
Hmm.
Can you turn off motion blur? No.
I think it's fine.
Please don't reset me.
Yes.
Okay, I'm on four.
Pictures seem okay.
Triple door, double vent.
Dude.
Really?
No anomaly again?
Let me check the exit 8.
Seems okay.
Yes!
Okay.
At 5.
vent, triple door, normal enough pictures, normal ass dude, there's no way there's no
anomaly there's something here I don't know what
no anomaly I don't know I don't I see nothing please God
was it? What was it? The ceiling? No phone in his hand? No phone? Oh my god, the guy holds
Really?
Crazy
All right
Okay, rather obvious TBH.
stairs are not supposed to be there. Triple door, double vent, does he have his phone?
He do. Eyes aren't following me. The lights seem okay, concourse. Make sure you got that
phone okay all right all right all right I think there's nothing nice there was
nothing back to four
okay double triple door double vent got his phone got his briefcase you guys are
You're not following me?
Good.
Dude, what the fuck was it?
The posters grow? One yellow tile? Wrong phone brand? It wasn't an iPhone. Of course.
What brand is that huh with clone you wear sniff that motherfucker
8. Nah, there's nothing here. There's nothing here.
Okay, same one as nothing.
That hall, there's a fucker down there. No thank you.
T-man
I don't see nothing.
I don't see nothing.
There was nothing.
Excellent.
Floor 3.
Insane Prague.
Okay, we got posters. The lights seem okay. Exit 8.
Concourse.
Dude, see...
He has a phone.
Does.
Triple door, double vent.
I'm not seeing any anomalies.
What was it?
The door knob?
Bullshit.
I checked the knobs.
Shhh.
You can go back and check?
Oh hey, floor one, apparently it was an anomaly.
We're good.
No, I cannot go back and check.
Three cameras. Okay, I'm gonna start paying attention to the cameras, I guess. Wait. No, there's three doors still.
Damn it.
Okay, I'm gonna assume there was no anomaly?
I was correct.
Lovely.
Triple camera.
Double vent. Triple door.
We've got lights. Exit 8.
Concourse.
Pictures.
All seem fine.
iPhone. Briefcase.
No socks. Ugly shoes.
building. Triple door knob. Is he smiling? Look at the chat. Fucking right. Didn't know
that could happen. Y'all help me. Stay mad. Don't be telling me things or I'm gonna look
at it. Double vent, triple door, scanning. Clear. I think we're good. We were in fact
good okay so what happens now
Does he still end up in the same spot? I have no idea. Okay, Gornobbs are fine, everything
here's fine. Poster 4. This? What is this? Where's Waldo? There you say there's too
many posters. Bullshit. 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6. You might be right. I'm gonna guess that
you're right let's see if you are you frustratingly are no you weren't right
that's the correct but what was what was the anomaly then what the fuck was it
his ass was bigger could have been
I don't know what anomalies going on here I see fucking nothing
Motherfucker.
Dude, what?
Okay.
I'm actually struggling so hard.
One, two, three, four, five, six, seven.
two three it's fucking fine concourse I mean there's no anomaly on level one
there's no way there's no way okay okay one two three four five six seven three
two of those three cameras we got this guy
He seems rather tall, does he not?
He's looking up.
I was like, I was hitting my control button, like am I crouching right now?
That's the...
Okay.
Simple enough.
Hard pass.
One, two, three, four, five, six, seven, pictures seem relatively normal.
Door door door vent vent camera camera camera
Doing nothing weird
Okay, no anomaly I was right
What I can die
Great. No anomaly, fuck it, send it. Nice! Alright, I speed ran to floor 2. Now I gotta
pay attention, there's probably an anomaly here. Camera, camera, freak, walking, no socks.
I see nothing, but there has to be an anomaly.
I've had two non-anomalies back to back.
There's no way it would give me a three-banger.
the tiles die I'm gonna leave no anomaly triple okay now there's an
anomaly there's no way I have four non-anomalies in a row
there's no way
Dude, there's no way!
Poster, poster, everyone saying poster.
right. I didn't think they would change just a little detail of one poster, but it looks
like they do.
Okay, all these seem normal.
He seems normal.
Triple door.
Normal.
Ceilings normal.
I think I'm good.
I was I think I've got it now
Now that I won't get you know swindled by these posters as much
Got his phone he's balding double vent triple door seven posters
Yeah, I see nothing.
What was it?
He had a buttplug growing, growing?
Okay, well I'm at zero, so I'm just going to fucking W key if I get it wrong, who cares?
Jesus Christ. Give me another easy one. We love those. Yep.
I don't see it.
Now I got me stressed about these posters now.
See nothing? Wait.
Huh.
Are they done growing?
Okay.
Excuse me, five.
I
Ball shouldn't be doing that
Okay, final floor?
Alright, what do we got, what do we got, make it easy, please.
No way. Please don't be one of those complicated ones, no fucking way.
They're not growing.
Yeah, eyes aren't following me.
Y'all seem to be the right bullshit.
Two.
Vents.
Three.
Doors.
Three.
Cameras.
I think there's no anomaly here.
I didn't see the guy with his phone very well, but I didn't see anything going on.
Nice.
Exit 8, baby.
Done.
Wait.
Is it another level?
Shit. Okay.
He's got a phone. He's fine.
Okay, right amount of pictures, they all seem okay, right?
Triple door, double vent, triple camera.
The lights maybe? No?
Lights seem okay.
That seems fine.
I don't think there's shit.
His credit score is lower.
I see it. I don't think you see it.
Yes!
GG!
Easy.
Beat the fuck out of it.
First, we got a game called, oh no.
Welcome to the game three.
Oh, it looks like it's just a demo.
Okay, I think I just wait then, so I'll actually play that.
Thomas the shank engine.
Dogs are losing their shit.
Don't question the title.
Jesus fuck. Looks like I fell asleep waiting for the train.
What am I doing?
Okay.
What?
What
What am I doing I'm so confused what is my goal here
Pull the lever.
It's gonna be my passport, it's gonna be a thing, I'm gonna power up the other side.
Is this a lever?
I don't know if I can access the case in front of the gate. I don't fucking know.
Oh, maybe this is it. Okay, well, it's labeled. Awesome.
I mean, if you don't want to get fucking- I'm gonna have a seizure.
Bro, what?
Okay, so there's a dead end behind me. I have to walk towards it.
I see, I got a lock diagonal too.
Oh
I love you, and I miss you.
Let's E-Enter code.
Okay, I gotta find this code somewhere then.
This is so annoying. I have to walk diagonal too for that extra movement.
Where the fuck's the code at?
Dodged.
Wait, there is a green light and a blue light.
Fucking cheese!
Okay, I saw a green light. I gotta go to the green. I'm done.
3373.
Close.
3, 3, 7, 3.
I can't crouch. I'm trying to hit the set. Okay. Okay, I had to enter it in backwards.
Door open
Holy fuck that was close where am I going?
Okay, maybe down in this row there's a door
God. Where the fuck's the door?
Oh my God, that was OP. Where do I go?
I can't move, I'm dead.
I don't know how I didn't die there.
Sure.
This game is ass, is it?
Do you think so?
I don't even see the security do- oh wait.
There it is. The blue light.
I mean, let me try 3373 again.
So it's different now.
What the fuck's the green?
I think what happened is I had a really good seed on my first attempt where I had the blue
basically the door code and the keypad were both next to each other just through sheer
good RNG. And now on this one, I'm fucked.
See here's the blue again. I need the green though.
There it is. Yeah, it's way the fuck over here.
Okay, it's 7-5-4-8 now 7-5-4 fucking 8
seven five four eight i don't think let me try counting seven five see it goes
backwards seven five four eight so eight four five seven eight four five seven eight four
Door open. Okay. So now the door is open, but I don't know where the open door is.
Maybe it's back at the beginning?
Okay, I'm at the beginning again.
I don't like being here.
Oh, hold on, door randomly.
Oh!
Hey Jesus fuck
So I think I just have to like somehow dodge this freak
It's an invisible wall right now, I can't go yet.
Still can't.
Still can't go.
Now I can.
Okay.
I can't keep track of this guy with fucking two pixels on my screen
I think he's got a very static attack pattern.
I think it's the same every time.
So I might be able to just cheese by W King past the first pattern and just get to the
end.
I gotta watch this again.
Okay, so first he goes down the middle.
Okay, then he hooks to the right side.
Or to the left of me.
Nice.
Shit, I'm in the next part now.
I'm just gonna duck, I'm just ducking. I don't know. I'm right there. Train whistle.
That was it
Miserable experience
All right out fishing is a game called out fishing
Oh my God, my orgies are killing me.
Here we go.
It is once again a demo.
Welcome to the game three demo is different from the full release. It is a standalone experience. Oh
And maybe I'll play it
But I'm playing outfishing which is also a demo by the way
Good job, so do you play the game you'll never play again. It's true
Never ever
unless
I do like a fucking steam roulette where I roulette a random game on my steam profile and play it no matter what it is
Maybe they'll get booted up again one day
No one can.
Your time is near death.
Unchanged.
Your time is near death.
Unchanged.
That's how it all started. After years in this place, I was being kicked out.
Someone said that this game is fully released.
Nah, it says coming soon.
Not out.
I worked slip through my fingers...
and...
so did the rent.
Okay, we're looking around.
I couldn't focus during the day.
Kept waking up in cold sweats at night.
I didn't know where else to go, so I just drove.
last stop
Copy in the rain with no lid
middle of nowhere
no one will bother me out here
What?
Well, I guess I'm more tired than I thought.
Yep.
Better stop the road for now.
Let's see if this place is really abandoned.
I guess no one's been here for years, even the lock's rotting away.
If I throw something at it, it should snap.
Okay.
Uh, can I grab a rock?
Yeah, I'm right I can.
Damn, I got a good one.
Okay.
I'm almost like I remember, but quieter.
I used to come here as a kid, but for the sake of the place offer undisclosed reasons.
It doesn't matter.
I've just heard a fish, and I stay afraid off for a while.
I thought the old cabin still stayed there.
I could use a place to crash.
Home sweet home. I guess.
Excellent.
It's a good day to make some cash.
All right, I need to find my journal and my fishing rod first journal and fishing rod
Well, that's my hands and the journal
There it is, all right, let's see if these fish are worth something your journal tracks
your current objectives and records of your collect okay open journal J
Catch your first fish, sell a fish, turn some cash, and buy something in the old vending machine.
Okay.
Well, let's go.
This is good to get this fat one around.
Different areas of the lake host different species, each with their own rarity and attributes.
Explore the shoreline and deeper waters to discover new catches.
new catches. Fish populations shift at night, and some species only appear under specific conditions.
What the hell was that cast? Hold on, no, no, no. What was that?
Oh, what?
Okay, line tension is really, fish deferring strength and tougher sticks are quite enough
to raise your gear.
Okay, I got a carp.
Okay, I got a carp.
Sell fish and they pick up, they're not even the size and rare.
That's one dollar.
Use a vending machine to buy up and upgrade gear.
a shovel used to dig up bait and sometimes other things.
The re-inventory is how to get to the baits actually, Casper here, fishing on for casting.
Hold on, let me get a couple more here.
Okay, how do I open inventory?
E. Bates.
Okay, we're throwing this worm on.
Hello!
Turn the game down.
Ugh.
Okay, right on top of the fish.
Bang.
I think I taunted.
What exactly should I be reeling, I don't know.
I'm just looking at the color, okay, a white fish.
Plus six dollars, by the way.
Bending machine, line strength, casting distance, real power.
Let's get line strength.
Got a big tot here.
Did I have any bait on there?
I do.
Okay, a trout. This is a strong motherfucker. $5.00. Final offer. Nice, I was right. Okay,
Let's get real power, and then we'll get casting distance.
Okay, hold on, let me taunt this fish.
I think I taunted it.
Taunting, bang.
They have six bucks, right, casting distance, bye.
I can buy snacks coming soon, bait coming soon, construction.
All right, well, let's go over here.
Instantly got him.
What is that sound?
What is that sound, why am I hearing that creaking?
It's a fucking basic trout!
Bigger though, I guess.
I got 12 dollars.
Uh, honestly, line strength.
It's feeling like this shit's about to break all the time.
There's a guy of asthma.
I guess so.
Oh shit.
new best catch 41 over a kilogram wow
Wow.
Nine dollars.
I'm just gonna get real speed.
I don't care about going farther yet.
I'm just going for, ah, maybe I'll go over here.
Let's try this area.
We got some bubbles here and stuff.
I don't think I'm reaching it.
Dang.
And this fish is getting fucking owned.
New fish captured.
A yellow perch, 0.2 kilograms.
Not that heavy.
$3 Yikes!
0.8, whitefish, okay. Is there any way I can like put these in my inventory and sell them
all in like, bunches? It's not.
Alright, I'm level two across the board.
It's also, I think, turning night time, so...
Not a bait.
What the fuck a glow worm?
When the siren sounds night has begun, danger stirs, but new catches and discoveries also
await on the lake.
You can only sleep once, true darkness falls, but beware, the deeper the night grows, the
The more oppressive the danger becomes, what?
I missed one.
Oh
I
Huh
6.2 kilograms.
6 dollars? You're fucking with me.
let's try a glow worm
What's going on?
What is it talking about, Beast- like, what's happening here?
sleep but there's nothing going on like what is it talking about beast like
what's happening here
five dollars
You don't smell that? No, I don't smell it. It's weird. What if I go in the water?
Come on, Ami.
Huh.
Okay, I don't see nothing, but it looks like a blood moon in the top left.
$30 minimum.
Three?
Why does it feel like my screen is getting more...
Oh!
Okay, a random picture on my screen of a scary woman.
Nice.
Go to bed.
Why?
Nice.
Go to bed. Why?
Two dollars? Ugh, fine.
What is that picture doing here? I remember now.
It's too late. I'm sorry.
You should probably call his parents now.
Fuck.
Hey kid, are you alright?
You two were in the same camp, right?
Did you see what happened?
That's how it was died.
Huh?
Why does it feel like there's something behind me?
Huh.
Oh, is it my fishing rod?
Oh, I thought it was like some girl or something like standing behind me.
I need to find a way to cross the river and reach that factory.
Well, wait a minute.
I've got mail?
messing with me or help me. It's hard to tell. Buy the cooler in the shop.
Ten dollars. Keeps your catch fresh so you can stay out longer. Oh, okay. Love that. Need four more
$4.
card 7.6 kg. Okay, and then I can buy this. You can now catch the, or open the
to store freshly caught fish, so we're just gonna have to be stored inside of it.
Okay, let's see here.
Oh, okay.
I just want to test this out. Let's catch the fish and try and put it in.
Come on!
Okay, so we catch this, open cooler, and that's it.
Come on!
Fuck, I got some little baby.
I want to try and get level 3 across the board before I go on an adventure.
a big boy it's like it's gonna rain soon oh special rain fish
jump fish there all right fuck it let's go dump this so I go here empty the
cooler. Alright, made some money. $18. Get some line strength. Is that a fucking ghost?
That kid? Do I- Do I know him? Maybe I could fix that old bridge.
the bridge how in the fuck okay these fish are a little stronger out here big
trout. There is a goliath fish right there. I wonder if like the size is based on how
they look in the water. Oh, I'm getting the big one. Oh, that's the big one. It's fucking
Huge I don't know if it like is a visual thing at all
Oh this guy's crazy
Okey-dokey it is a Salmon
I'm just gonna go fucking dump him over here.
I might be upgrading right after.
We'll see.
$11.
That's a record.
Okay, and then we go here.
Cast Distance, Building Book,
Build and Repair using the blueprints that you own.
Okay, so I have to buy that.
Top tabs have more stuff in the vending machine.
Alright, no I checked these, it was just a bunch of stuff that...oh you're right, there's
do things dried fish cost a dollar construction six dollars
Nice.
Man, it only takes up one slot?
That's crazy.
Six hours to fix a bridge, the economy is fixed.
Well, Legos.
They're not that expensive.
A light fish, okay.
I'm trying to time, but I'm not hitting anything.
I just gotta back it up and go on top of this guy.
Yoo-hoo, hey.
Oh, this guy, this guy, this guy.
Come on, yes.
Damn, that guy just got fucking speed ran, holy shit.
I'm just trying to make big money before I go, you know, spend.
Eat it!
Oh, we're at night time.
Eat the food!
Now, now you're getting fucking targeted, bro.
got him
got him
run as in really fast
Big single.
Alright, nighttime's looking okay, we're fine.
the fuck a black car is that new what the fuck little bendy boy let's go turn that
I'm going to go back to the building.
you fucking kidding me right now I feel like some didn't even make it in like
they fell out somewhere else
No, maybe that's it.
Alright.
Alright.
Construction, need to buy that.
Tools, building book, buy that.
Twenty-two dollars left.
Let's get more line strength, level four, no problem.
Prepare the bridge section. $2.
Well, that should be the trick. Let's keep going.
One step closer.
So that's how that works, huh?
I don't know what this fish is, but I'm struggling to bring it in, and I upgraded my line strength
to level 4.
So I don't know how I'm struggling.
It's gotta be a new fish.
It's fucking not.
Maybe it is a giga car, we'll see.
Four dollars.
I'm going to bed.
Put the door open.
You should do wild classic hardcore fish found challenge.
What the hell is that?
That's a good idea.
What the hell is that?
That's a good idea.
Someone's at the door?
Who's there?
Hello?
Matt Fragman.
I can hear people arguing.
I don't want to be seen now.
Really?
How about you sit here?
What?
Gasp.
Cretace clues about the fish it is bound to.
The information is out of your fishing trap.
So, that's supposed to dig now?
Fuck it, let's go.
What is that?
Oh my gosh.
What do I do with this?
I'm gonna go sell it.
Okay.
I'm going to go sell it.
I feel like any fish will ever come.
I mean, they're fuckin' bite-
Okay, yeah, let me go to sleep, that's fine.
What a wild night!
Huh, woo!
Huh, wacky.
I shouldn't have come back.
I didn't even look at my journal.
Let's catch two kilograms.
Okay, well...
Interesting.
Well, I can try upgrading my line strength and whatnot all the way.
I also gotta build this bridge.
Let's build the bridge.
Get my date.
Okay, good one, Dave.
Plus one dollar, the fuck?
Okay.
Okay, good enough.
But actually, it's not halfway there.
Just a few more pikes.
Almost done.
No bait. No fish.
I'm not sure what the best bait is here out of the free stuff, but what's in the other
house?
There is none.
Okay, plus one.
Okay, plus one.
Plus two.
Eat it. Eat it. Turn around. There we go.
Oh my god.
definitely there.
hey last row
surely there's a fish right there
surely
Nick? Soda, you? Is that all you said? Interesting.
Go away out here.
Jesus.
is fighting me. What is that? Another one of these bitches? Alright. This is good enough.
Let's go sell all this.
Okay, empty this.
don't know how much money I just got. Pretty good amount. I could max out lion strength
instantly. Or I could go casting distance and real power both to level 4. Can I finish
the bridge if I do that. I think I can. I think it's literally just one tap and it's done.
A lot of massive. Let's see what's around here.
An old photo. This place looks familiar.
They say there's a place beneath the lake.
Not on any map.
A red room where the world turns upside down.
They say it's where the devil lives.
That's not true, right?
And why did the lake glow red the other night?
Well...
Well, let me go explore this building here.
What the fuck?
There's nothing here.
It's like a slender man building, just completely empty.
There's also something beeping red way over there?
Fuck it, let's go.
Miss Paper?
It's locked, clearly.
That's what we look like we could get any closer for now.
There's probably something to find nearby.
A battery.
Could be useful.
Fucking battery.
Where the fuck would I bring this?
Okay, maybe there's something way down this road.
Big cans.
Love that for me.
This looks like a weird-ass spot.
Shit, it do be nighttime now.
The power, of course.
Far matter.
Shut the fuck up.
He shot the fuck off!
I was gonna shoot the fish.
But I got no ammo.
Fuck that is funny.
Let's go fishing.
Come on, eat the fucking food.
Really?
Maybe they need particular bait or something, I don't know.
They must.
Okay, let's put on these guys or maybe the glowworms even
And they're ignoring it okay glowworm it is
Maybe bait from a shop, that could be it as well.
Glowworm.
They love that.
Look out there, it's really hard to bring in though.
Jesus.
My rod is really struggling here.
It's a catfish, okay.
Yeah, I gotta catch more catfish.
Come on guys, get it.
Got him.
Dang it.
I'm okay to keep going, right?
One more.
I don't know what it is, but I'm not good.
I'm extremely not good.
What the fuck?
I'm dead. I'm like actually in Africa.
Sayon, I drains your sanity. Okay, so there's a sanity mechanic.
Oh. Do I lose everything? Oh no.
I lost everything.
Someone put something in the mailbox again?
I can't believe it.
A walkie-talkie.
By the walkie-talkie will trigger a series of events leading to the end of the demo.
You can keep fishing and sparring if- okay.
32 dollars no well that's the demo guys gg's maybe we'll play the game when it's actually
up.
Obey the voice.
It's an eight dollar game on Steam.
They usually don't cost money.
Maybe they put more than two hours into the game.
It's possible, could also just be a scam, also very possible.
Look at that spooky monster right there.
That's crazy.
So I was reading stuff the juicer played this game no way I guess I shouldn't bother
Okay, rules you must always follow.
If you hear a voice other than the voice, ignore it.
If you encounter being a certain, or encounter being your certain is not human, do not look
at it.
It may try to get your attention or simply ignore you, no matter what, do not look.
If you detect any sign of life having moved or moving, turn back immediately and press
the red button.
Okay, we will eliminate the thread transfer duty section.
As soon as you complete the task you are given, turn back and press the blue button, do not linger.
Okay.
Hello, the consciousness transfer procedure has begun in accordance with the insurance protocol.
Your accident report has been re-
Oops.
To complete the process successfully, all you need to do is follow my instructions.
Any deviation will result in the procedure being prolonged or an indefinite amount of time.
The procedure is now in progress.
For the procedure to be completed successfully, you must obey the following rules without exception.
1. If you hear a voice other than the voice, ignore it.
2. If you encounter a being you are certain is not human, do not look at it.
it may try to get your attention or simply ignore you no matter what do not
look three if you detect any side of life having moved or moving turn back
immediately and press the red button we will eliminate the threat and transfer
you to a new section okay four as soon as you complete the task you were given
turn back and press the blue button do not linger your first task is simple
Before she finishes counting to 10, you must find her.
The countdown will begin the moment you step into the house.
Remain quick and alert.
Obey the rules.
Okay.
Find her before she counts to 10.
One.
Two.
3...
4...
5...
6...
7...
...
Dude what?
No, it's CG.
3.
4.
5.
Hrm.
Hrm.
Patient 10, test 1.
The reaction was as expected.
Task complete.
Go back and press the blue button.
Okay.
Easy.
Welcome back.
Good to be back.
This time, in addition to the main rules, a new section rule has been added.
You may enter each room only once, and your new task is to count how many people are in
the house.
Count the people, then return and press the blue button.
After that, tell me the number.
luck and obey the rules
uh... fuck okay
one
two three
four
five six
10 11 I think 11 is the guy running across count maybe he was the other one I don't know
Oh, press red button when moving.
Welcome back.
This time, we're going to play a game together.
I assume you played hot and cold when you were a kid.
It's something like that, just with an extra rule.
In the next sections, you'll need certain tools, and you'll find them somewhere in this one.
As you get closer to the tool you need, I'll say Hot, and as you move away, I'll say Cold.
But like I said, there's a section-specific rule, and it contradicts Rule 3.
But you still need those tools.
The counting one has returned, and this time, just don't take your eyes off her.
Good luck, and obey the rules.
What?
What?
Cool.
Cool.
The examination revealed that two individuals were still alive.
And the teenage girl, her older brother.
However, the only fingerprints found on her brother...
He's not saying warm or anything.
I'm not sure what this is about.
Oh, this might be a game.
Here we go, here we go.
Hot.
hot
Is it that thing on the left here?
Is that it?
What's the point of all this? What are you even doing right now?
He said you had an accident and now he's thrown you into another mortal danger.
What does any of this have to do with the constant-
Remember the first rule. Ignore the other voices. Every task you do has a purpose.
I'll explain it when the time is right.
I mean he said cold like are there more tools I need I'm confused
I'm going to go upstairs, maybe something spawned now that I picked up one objective?
I need him to say warm or cold but he's not saying shit so I'm thinking that I
be... oh okay that answers that.
hot
Y'all see an item anywhere to loot oh
Huh
I'm thinking it's that flashlight, yeah.
Try this again.
I seem to have fucked up and gone into the wrong room.
That's crazy.
That's crazy.
You're not supposed to be in here!
Welcome back.
Due to assistive malfunction, the third rule is now out of service.
Once the malfunction is resolved, the rule will become active again.
From this moment on, your only option is to complete the task you've been given.
time there are two identical rooms inside the house right find them and then identify
the seven differences between them shut up mark the differences in only one of the rooms
the other will serve as your reference point after that turn and press the blue button however
this section comes with a few special rules there are numerous mannequins throughout the house
but it has been confirmed that one of them is capable of hoping as for the flashlight you're
holding, it's a bit old. The staff told me they forgot to replace it. Each battery provides
only about 4 minutes of light and the batteries you need are held by the mannequins. Because
of this, be very careful which mannequin you approach for a battery. It's been reported
that the one that can move becomes aggressive if looked at for more than 3 seconds. And
one more thing, you cannot take any batteries unless your flashlight is flickering. If the
flashlight is flickering it means it has only about one minute of life left be
quick and be cautious obey the rules okay I hope you didn't leave your
flashlight on while listening to all these rules if you did you'll be
starting with 83 seconds already gone
So wait, spot the seven differences?
Why did we do this to them?
You're not the innocent one.
That mess is your fault.
You heard the radio, didn't you?
Something just happened?
I have no clue what I'm doing, no I don't.
There's supposed to be two identical rooms, but like, is it these two rooms?
Upstairs.
So this one and this one?
That can't be right.
No.
The flashlight is in fact flickering at the moment.
Did you crack the ceilings?
Hold on.
A voice here.
Okay, different ceilings.
How do I mark these down?
I said I can mark them in only one room.
I don't know.
Click idiot one difference found
Okay close rec
Same how about that shelf
Same laundry and box
Same boxes shelf
I don't like these sounds okay bed and then tissues, fat tissues.
Bed, tissues, yeah.
I don't think this painting was there one difference found it wasn't a picture okay
let's check the desk computer desk
My bad.
What about that plant?
Yeah, plants very different.
I also need to reload my batteries soon.
Okay.
What the fuck is that?
Okay, I can't take that battery quite yet.
Oh, now I can.
T.Y.
Hmm.
I don't even know what the fuck else to look for.
The windows maybe?
Maybe the windows are slightly askew or something.
No, those are the same.
Just click everything, you were so stupid.
I don't know if I'm allowed to do that.
Did you catch the pink box?
One difference found.
I did not. Thank you.
Was it different?
I feel like that picture is gonna be different.
Are you fucking kidding me?
You're useless coward.
I should have been in control.
Disappointing.
Find the seven differences between the two identical rooms.
Do not let your flashlight battery run out.
The six batteries in this section are held by some of the mannequins.
One difference found.
One difference found.
One difference found.
One difference found.
voting one battery has been removed wrong choice one battery in the house has been removed
each wrong choice will remove another battery make sure you don't run out of them because
there are only six batteries in this section got it
Okay, fuck. I think I'm caught up now, but where the hell am I?
can's boxes that picture is correct I'll check this shelf lonely writer
Then it goes to some old woman never dies
Okay, Steve Queen was that there
Yeah, that's all fine is there a book on top of the desk
Anything I can interact with that is the computer itself different
No? Count the cans. 1, 2, 3, 4 black, 3 white, 4 black.
One battery has been removed.
What?
Nope, that's it.
Wrong can, Bozo. Oh my god, it's a specific can I have to click.
One battery has been removed.
One of you needs to have a battery.
Please.
Why did we do this?
You're not the innocent one.
That map is your fault.
You heard the radio, didn't you?
Okay, I'm on it.
One difference found.
Okay, I mean fuck how many more things are there?
Yes, I fucking did check the spray can
Maybe the pile of books
No way, it's that. There's no way. Okay, maybe it's one of these. Cat Moon. Makeout.
horse bird
now those are correct fuck okay
dog is correct
i don't know what the fuck it is
I might just spam start clicking and just W key all the
the uh...
batteries out
two pillows
A lot of people telling me things that are already there, or I've already noticed.
I'm wondering if these books are the same at the top.
Ceiling fan.
Dude, no way.
Oh, my shit's flickering.
Oh, jeez.
Ma'am, I need a battery from someone.
The
Shelf
I'm dead
the
she said the shelf
disappointing on the seven differences between the two identical rooms
do not let your flashlight battery run out
the six batteries in this section are held by some of the mannequins
All right, so let's see if I can remember.
Uh...
That's a difference.
Three...
Four...
Already clicked this box?
I already forgot.
Oh yeah, the spray paint.
It's...
I forget which one it was, I already forgot.
So how many is that, five?
They said the shelf, okay, box, box, checking.
Box, box, okay, paper, binders.
Paper, binders, okay, books, books.
Forgot the pink box, I got the pink box, didn't I?
One difference.
I guess I didn't, okay, six out of seven.
Blind? There's no way. What?
Oh, there's the books here on the left.
that flashlight die. It would be a shame to fail after succeeding. You found all the differences.
Go back and press the blue button.
Fuck. Welcome back. The system error persists. Unfortunately, the blue and red
are currently offline to engage the mechanism you must locate the three
missing fuses for the breaker panel typical however that doesn't stop me
from giving you tasks in this section we'll play voice says I give an order
and you obey just like always but there are some time it says if the command
begins with voice says you must comply if not ignore it I won't tell you how
much time you have for each command and don't expect X command immediately. Due to the system
error I have to log your performance manually, pen and paper. This might help things down.
You'll have to wait. And while you wait, just try not to let her catch you. Good luck, and
No balls.
Do not fail, each mistake makes her faster.
Voice says, go to the red room.
Voice says touch the picture with the ship.
Touch the picture with the ship.
She's fast now. Oh, she's really fast. I don't have to get the battery, didn't say
voice says voice says and turn off the blue
from light
they get it
I also got to flip those switches but I don't see them anywhere
and says go to the yellow room
put it in the yellow room
and
voice says find the double fuses in the red room
find the double fuses in the red room
Oh my God.
If you still can't find it, check near the TV.
Fuck.
Got him.
Got him.
Voice says, go to the hella room and take the tonight.
Fuck.
Stab her in the stomach.
I will not be doing that.
Be back.
Get away from her as far as possible.
Voice says, do not move.
you
voices as you
very simple if the sentence starts with
what it says do what I say
if it doesn't don't and until you hear the result sound
don't let her catch you this way collect all three puse pieces
When the command to insert them into the fuse box is given, place them in the fuse box and activate the buttons.
I think I was fucked from there because she was already too fast.
Each mistake makes her faster.
Voice says, go to the red room.
Okay, so I need to find something with a ship on it.
This has a ship on it? Okay.
I don't know if I fucking clicked it or not.
Go to the blue room.
Find and get the battery. You can eat that.
No, I don't.
Voice says, turn off the blue sunlight.
And says go to the yellow room
I don't know if it said voice says but all right I'm in
Said don't well Gigi she's gonna get faster than
Voice says find the double huses in the red room
If you still can't find it, talk more to people.
It's a great place to get a drink.
Boys says go to the Hella Room and take the kitchen knife.
Stab her in the stomach.
Excuse me, I'm just part of the simulation.
Thank you.
Get away from her as far as possible.
Okay, this is where I died last time, so I need to get max distance here, before I stop moving.
So let's get her in this corner.
Voice says, do not move.
Maybe I gotta get away now.
Oh, I fucked that up. I needed to get away before it says you can move again
Voice says find a few sockets
Got him
If you still can't find it, check around the window.
Okay, well, I'm here.
Forget the camera, please. Now the media came.
Voice says turn on the radio. Where is the radio?
Fireplace. It's cooked. I have to loop her here.
The suspect had been exhibiting strange and unnecessarily aggressive behavior for a week
prior to the incident.
On the day of the murder, the suspect reportedly entered the kitchen, stared at his family,
grabbed the first knife he saw before shelling threats.
According to the sister, their mother spoke calmly, attempting to de-escalate the situation.
She eventually embraced her son as he appeared to calm them.
How long do I have?
However, moments later while still in her arms, the suspect stabbed his own mother in the abdomen.
Nobody says find a bigger space than you can't open.
They find some shit in the yellow room.
I
Check the sink
Didn't say voice says.
I don't know if I'm going to listen to the voice.
Voice says, go to the red room.
What are you waiting for? Hurry.
Stab her in the stomach.
I wonder if it wants me it's just gonna have me like do shit forever until I die
I wonder if there's actually a choice here either keep playing forever or you just ignore
the voice and just leave
Okay.
Well, isn't that a dead end there?
My fuck, if I go that direction, I feel like I am.
Oh, fucking loop here, thank goodness.
Do I have any more spings?
Okay, it's green now, do I win?
I don't know.
Go to red button.
Good.
The buttons in rule 3 are back in effect.
Voice says, go back and press the red button.
Okay, I win.
There's no rules or anything here.
No, no, no, no, no.
I don't know if I need to stop with it. Also, what am I trying to even do?
Are you slow?
You don't know how many missiles were allowed to move.
What was that?
That...
It doesn't sound like something that can save us from...
Mother.
What?
What?
What?
What?
What?
What?
What?
What?
What?
What?
What?
What?
What?
What?
What?
What?
I guess I moved?
I don't know if it's there or not.
Oh my god, he was right there.
Minus one.
You have the key?
Yeah, I'm gonna go upstairs.
Are you? Hello?
You don't know how many mistakes were allowed to make.
Keep him stable.
I think the path in this section is behind the camera.
Track the camera sound.
Maybe...
Kitchen?
Okay.
He is moving very fast.
Hey, the buttons don't seem to work.
All right, well now I know to go straight fucking upstairs
Found
I don't have a key anymore.
that's crazy so I have to kite until I get the prompt to say that I have the key that's
it all right whatever fuck that alt f4 holy shit idols of ash
Overwhelmingly positive, okay, interesting, $3.
I mean, I guess I'd just send it, it just looks like this.
I got a pee though.
I got a pee, you're back.
Pitch.
Peach, Mouse, Peach, Peach, Mouse.
Alright gamers.
Peach Peach Mouse
Peach Mouse Pea-p Apple Mouse
Pea Mouse Peach Pea Mouse
Peach Mouse Peach Peach Mouse
Shh shh shh shh shh shh shh shs SHIT
All Right Gamers
Peach Mouse Godopedia Peach Peach Mouse
Skipped
Piss on what does this say?
What are the piss on the company time again, and you're getting written up buddy you spent half your shift in the job
He'd like three times
All right, let's see what this game is
Do-do-do okay, I can zoom in I'm sprinting
Okay, throw grapple claw.
Alright, that's easy enough.
Is there fall dam?
Nope.
I need to get to the bottom of this place.
okay so i'm sure there is some type of fall down here
is that's a little absurd if i land here
here
Okay, it's fine.
You breathe in the ancient ashes.
The musty scent of stale air is replaced with pine and morning dew.
You can almost see the faint outline of your village, stirring away.
You remember it was the day you left for this place.
You don't want to remember this, it serves no purpose to you now.
These ashes will remember you.
Is it on fire?
Also why are there like ghostly buildings here?
I guess that's, I don't know, something moving on.
How far down can this go?
Oh, it's got a little bit of a limit. Alright.
Close.
Hmm.
Can I like, fly and then try and grab shit mid-air?
Is that possible?
Huh?
What is that thing?
Wait, wait, wait, wait.
Oh my god, what is that thing?
Holy fuck.
That's horrifying!
Well, pretty fun.
cool now that I got this thing chasing me I'm way more into it
gotta test this so that does not work
maybe it does it's got to aim better
How'd that not work?
What the French toast?
Oh.
Oh.
Oh.
Oh.
Oh.
Oh.
Oh.
Oh.
Oh.
Oh.
Oh.
Oh.
Oh.
Oh.
Oh.
Oh.
Oh.
I'm practicing!
of
I can just grab the walls here, what the fuck?
Ha
I think I need to get over there to that white light or whatever.
Where is this just healing?
I'm full health.
Where do I need to get then? Maybe that light over there?
Oh, that's not gonna work.
Oh, I'm panicking. I'm alive.
of
I got it.
Oh, God damn it, thing is right there.
you breathe in the ancient ashes okay see the shape of her it is frail and
twisted the coil rod had already done its terrible job and left you with the
pieces you smell sickness hanging in the air you don't want to remember this it
serves no purpose to you now great awesome do I just keep going down
I don't know if I even can go much farther down here, oh god.
Hmm, that hurt a little bit, but I took it.
Oh my fucking god.
I don't know if I should be here. I'm not really... I'm kinda just going one at a time
and I might be screwing myself over.
Jesus.
He coming.
Oh no!
Do I get that shortcut though?
Nice! Animal HP! Fuck yeah!
Please follow the wisdom of Moon Moon and play Scatman.
So your TTS link is broken. Time.
You're broken!
OHH!
Crazy.
Big prog.
Good luck crossing that bozo
Oh
Oh
Off dog
Hoda not the time not the time just very much not the time
Not making it not making it my leg
Hey
I'm not paying more than ten dollars for this stupid meme. Please click here link
I can't click the link right now. I'm very busy. Thank you, though. Goodness.
Oh, fuck. Am I screwed here?
Uh, I have never been more screwed in my life, actually.
In less.
Oh fuck.
No way I can make that.
I missed.
I couldn't get it.
Maybe there's an easier path I'm just not seeing because it feels like what I'm doing
is way harder than it needs to be.
He's right there.
And once again, gonna go on this side, I guess.
Just feels the best.
My goal is that green shit right there.
checkpoint. Yes! Did that just slam my face into the wall? I think it did and it hurt.
We're going to go for that ledge right there.
Oh my god, he's right there.
Breathe it in.
God, you breathe in the ancient ashes.
You see the shape of her.
It is strong, hail, beautiful, but distant.
You remember this moment? She waited for months for you to return.
Every step you had ever taken was a step towards her.
Seeing her distance shape was unbearable. It's too far. You don't want to remember her like this.
Great. I don't care.
Moving the fuck on.
I need that healing.
Okay, we're gonna have to fuckin' do some shit here.
Skrrt!
Alright, we hit that.
Can I get down?
Nice.
God, he's still right there.
This is easy.
Close.
He is actually fucking right there
Is he getting faster?
Is he getting faster?
Fuck, my legs, ow, whatever.
Oh, I missed.
I'm an idiot.
I'm half!
Not a problem.
Like what?
Oh, hell.
Now I gotta go to a different angle here.
Holy shit servers streaming.
Rent must be due people bless.
Oh fuck I'm streaming all the time!
uh...
all that's fucked up
well
fucking just delivered myself to his face
this is awful
No shortcut- there was a- do I care about that HP?
No shortcut. There was a...
Do I care about that HP?
I got a damn right I do.
Top myself. Now where was...
Fuck, maybe it's farther down.
There's only one direction out.
I just gotta make sure I'm not missing it, like I just did.
It's ain't working.
Fuck it.
Where the hell was that one direction?
I'm looking on the right to see if I see it.
I don't fucking see it, screw it.
There it is.
Okay.
It's way farther down than I thought.
I mean from here though oh hello I miss but whatever
Give me the healing.
Jesus.
I think I need to get to that tower.
Mmm, actually this ain't feeling so hot either, Mr. Krabs.
It's also feeling like shit. Big waste of time.
Centipede's on the way. Where do I fucking go?
Oh god.
I'm alive it's fucking fine
It works. Any check pointers?
Okay, well I don't have a lot of health now, so I really gotta not fuck up.
Uh.
Uh...
Oof.
God, I'm good.
Okay, big healer.
Uh...
Okay, it's gonna keep going down.
I wish there was a fucking checkpoint.
Aw, fuck.
No, no, no, no, no, no.
I see nowhere to go with that.
That's just a fucking hole.
I think I have to do something with this. I just don't know what.
trick shot and somehow shoot to that ledge but uh this is really ballsy with no way to like
oh i'm good oh i'm fucking good okay
Okay.
Shit.
Shit.
Now I'm just fucked in a different direction.
There's nothing to grab onto...
anywhere.
Okay, let me just check under me, okay?
Down one level, sure.
Okay, we're gonna have to go horizontal, I can't go...
up or down here.
I mean...
I missed.
Okay.
This way.
Okay, we're down.
He's way up there.
I mean clearly the guzuhull
G I'm fucked
I'm fucking crawling
I want to sort some ashes please you breathe in the ancient ashes
Snorting them deep into your veins.
It coats your throat and lungs.
You fight the urge to cough in your eyes water.
The fuck.
They warned you this place was filled with illusions.
Tricks of the mind, intangible and ruinous, wow.
They claimed all who come here, meet the face of regret.
Wow.
Oh my god, it's her.
green, like the checkpoints.
That was fun.
That was fun.
Continue.
Nightmare mode unlocked.
What?
That's crazy.
That's crazy.
Our next tutorial over, dude.
It is faster and smarter.
Kills have been destroyed.
So no checkpoints?
I don't know what a speedrun looks like.
All right, it is smarter and it is moving now.
out she
What is that thing?
I missed.
Okay.
Alright, I'm back in the beginning. Let me just see a speedrun of this shit.
What's it called again?
idols of ash let's see it first KIN world record 158 let's see I don't know
what drives someone to want to speed on this
Damn, they've got that fucking movement tech, okay?
What the fuck up?
Wait, what?
My game opened or something?
I think that was my game.
I just got eaten.
Maybe?
Oh
Wow
Is that a success?
be failed successfully I don't know
alright interesting
all look here he act does he come up here
to the fucking surface
One HP by the way.
I just want to see what he does when I hang on a rope right next to him.
What does he do?
Oh my god, he ungrapples your fucking rope.
He ungrappled that shit.
He cuts it.
Alright.
The floor above is the next game.
This is a $13 game on Steam.
All right.
Doesn't have overwhelmingly positive reviews.
Cringe.
Looks like shit. There's three war levels and only $3.
To the game, I was just playing. Cool.
Any Warcraft 3 maps planned for today? Yes. Yes. A lot of Warcraft 3 queued up.
for sure. Hell yeah.
What the fuck is this? Someone linked the clip to me.
What do you say you for?
Can they hear me?
Yes I hear you!
Hello?
Oh!
Eww!
Fuck that is funny!
Eww!
It's so good!
Oh shit!
Can they hear me?
She said ugly people shouldn't beat me after.
Oh shit!
I'm sorry.
I'm sorry.
I'm sorry.
I'm sorry.
I'm sorry.
I'm sorry.
I'm sorry.
I'm sorry.
I'm sorry.
I'm sorry.
I'm sorry.
I'm sorry.
I'm sorry.
I'm sorry.
I'm sorry.
Not wrong.
Got everything that happens to E-Rub is so fucking funny.
It's just like amplified.
The floor above one of this is gonna be about like annoying roommates
Another clip check it again
I can't be this is moderator bro
What are you talking about man?
What are you talking about?
You're protecting me. Are you kidding me?
This guy's not real.
I am fucking real.
You did it. You did it.
Boss, no job.
Dude.
What do you mean fucking cook?
What are you going to say? I can't say nothing to that.
that I lose no matter what there these discord matter moderator ah I can't
do this is for moderator bro what discord moderator we is man that's
actually a thing kids do they say that ah I thought I was just for typing not
for saying out loud. What the hell? Alright. The floor above. Didn't he say bro? He said
ah the next one like his dick. Stupid ah. But like I thought that's just what you type.
You don't say that out loud. I don't know whatever. Do your thing kids. Fuck it.
Mike?
Are you here?
Oh God.
Then we still have a chance to escape.
Okay.
Listen carefully.
Mike?
Are they sitting?
Are you what?
Mike?
What?
Oh
Hey, oh can you hear me? Do you remember who you are Mike? I can spin
Oh, what is normal?
shift to view the buttons.
I see it green because like.
That's a way too obvious.
Let's make sure that Rome isn't trying to fool you.
Look directly at where the TV used to be then close your eyes.
How?
Okay.
Okay.
When the press is ringing, okay.
If you don't see any changes in the room, you saw the hallucination that disappeared
and the luminous normal, okay.
The room looks different than usual.
You saw the hallucination that does not disappear.
The room may play with your imagination, and not everything you see is dangerous.
Close your eyes, check hallucinations, some will disappear, others will remain.
Some anomalies may not disappear immediately.
So after closing your eyes, you should wait a moment to make sure the anomaly is truly
disappeared.
To escape the room, you need to press the correct button nine times in a row.
All right, it's literally an exit eight, but, well, I don't fucking remember anything
I'm just getting here.
Huh, I just don't know how subtle it's all going to be different.
Or, I don't know, how subtle is everything going to be?
Do I need to memorize every painting on the wall?
Oh, that chair. Picture seems crazy.
Is it gone? What was that?
Is this an anomaly? Cause this motherfucker's just moving around.
I got my mouse.
Jump again?
No?
jump no jump no trying to make it jump again it jumps here here here
all right well
right button
Seems like everything's fine in this room, but better double-check as long as you're...
I mean, is that an anomaly?
She's gone now, but this coat rack is still here.
So like, I don't know if it's an anomaly or not.
Red button.
Okay, three.
I think it was.
we'll take that
So, if I see-
Okay, red button, I guess.
Okay, five out of nine.
So far, so good.
This might be a green angle.
those police sounds count
I'm hitting green.
Okay, that was right.
Okay, that image is gone.
Love that.
Is it still green?
Okay, we're still in the green unless I see Morty, the cat.
I'm hitting green.
I think it's a green angle.
Okay, let's see if that says 7.
Yup, they're good.
This is going to be a red for sure.
I mean there's a spider over there.
Did I just hit the red and just call it a day?
And like hides his eyes when I look at him.
I mean, whatever, right? It's red.
Like he's not going away.
Yep, two or eight. Alright.
I mean, it did disappear, so it might still be a green angle.
I don't see any changes.
Is it another green angle?
yeah it is I missed it back to zero what was it I guess that thing counted as a
monster like I said hit red it kind of disappeared I don't know
Oh, he's wrong again.
Interesting that her life or her scream is like queued up with my blink.
So would that be an anomaly?
Even though it ended up leaving in the end?
No.
There was no anomaly.
So yeah that was not an anomaly.
It's so weird, what?
Is Cam covering the count?
No, you see it on the wall above the door.
Once again, I was wrong.
I've been wrong five times in a row through pure RNG.
Taking just quick guesses.
It's impressive.
fuck it green just guessing again
okay nice
it was a green angle
They got my ass.
Sounds more hunt you.
Really?
At least.
Not physically.
Okay, well it left, so that's not an anomaly.
Anomaly or not?
I don't know.
No clue at this point.
See, I don't either.
It's given me different info.
I'm going to say it is an anomaly.
Let's see.
If that says zero, I'm wrong.
OK.
It was an anomaly.
I hear commotion.
I see no cat.
I see you.
That's a red.
Should be.
Exit.
Hi.
Huh.
You know.
Huh.
That was in fact an anomaly.
Okay well that fixed itself so not an anomaly.
Skippy can I help you?
Oh, are you playing the scary game?
Oh, you wanna play?
Okay.
Coda, come here.
Coda, come here.
Coda!
Coda, come here.
He doesn't listen.
Oh!
That's Skippy.
Kota, come here.
Okay.
Oh, there he is.
Get up here.
Come here.
Oh, hello, baby.
Let me pay with your toes.
He gets so mad if I touch his feet.
He hates his feet being touched, but right now he's dealing with it because he wants
to touch it.
Oh.
Hey, give me your toes.
Give me your toes.
Give me your toes.
Give me your toes, catch it.
You gotta let me touch your feet more.
He hates his feet touched. Why?
He hates it.
Just touch his toes, he gets angry.
Who likes it?
I mean it's just...
Is there supposed to be a light there? I think there is.
I think this is a green angle. Hopefully I'm not wrong.
Should be seeing seven.
Nice. Thank you.
I will guide you to the exit.
Will you?
I am doing this for the first time, but I believe we can make it.
Okay. Well, those anomalies disappeared.
I'm not seeing any I think it's a green
Green.
All right, whoop, yep, green.
What is going on up here?
Oh.
We're on eight.
Fact is zero.
So that, by the way, was not an anomaly.
I think, I genuinely think if it's not in the room, outside of the room, yep.
You alright?
That's my force!
Okay.
Okay, even though he's friendly, I still hit red.
Well it did leave everything that I just blinked away.
So, it's not an anomaly anymore.
Interesting.
So, no anomalies.
I almost hit the wrong button.
Nice, that was correct.
That's fucked.
I'm not seeing anything.
The TV was being a little wonky.
was inside the room that was not anomaly dude what the fuck he left so soon
He didn't disappear, he left. I guess. Ugh.
Can I say no anomalies here?
That was wrong.
the fuck up you're kidding me
the
the
Okay.
I don't think anything's happening.
Okay. Nothing happened. Hit green. Red? What are you talking about? Red. What? The
The Blue Moon Lightning.
Where?
Outside?
Didn't we talk about it not being in the room so it doesn't matter?
It just pissed me the fuck off.
Okay.
So we're still looking at a green though, cause he left, right?
Oh my god, he's so dumb.
Are you?
and jet
She left
Alright
It's not only your fault that you're here
In a way
It's mine
Okay
What?
Another cat, aren't they?
Morty's Biss, it's a free, uh, free win, essentially.
Okay.
Okay.
He left, so it doesn't matter.
Am I crazy, but that picture wasn't there.
This bulletin board was empty.
There's nothing supposed to be on it.
Yeah.
Five.
Some of them are different.
Really?
I hope you'll figure out which...
Okay. ...and do the right thing in time.
I got baited I got baited I got baited she fucking came back are you kidding me
I'm being this is actually crazy you need to blink longer
Fuck it green doesn't matter mad zero
Yep great that are right
Are you scared?
No.
That's good.
That means you're not one of them yet.
Stupid.
This is looking like a green angle so far.
Everything's disappeared or left.
There is like a radio or something on.
Green.
See if it says two.
Yep.
You stepped into a place where no one called you.
Now, we'll devour you.
Devour you?
Yeah, this picture is different, right? I don't think that's the picture it's always been.
I think it's a red angle.
It was.
Wait, that picture is still cooked. What?
Did it just do the same back-to-back? Is it another red?
Or does it just always look like that?
No, it's different. It wasn't. It was a man earlier. I mean, I could have just got rolled
the exact same anomaly back to back. I'm gonna hit red again and see what happens.
I need to be at 4 or I'm wrong.
Wow.
Yeah, it's a dude.
I rolled the anomaly back to back.
That's crazy.
I mean, this could be a green.
I'm seeing no floating heads or any crazy bitches, no spiders.
Nothing there.
Little girl's face in the right way.
It's fine.
Fine. I already hit green, but he doesn't count. We're good.
This thing baited me that one time.
It's not moving, so I think it's cooked.
Nice.
Can't get rid of that.
Seventh for you, dimwit.
It's the sixth.
seventh
early on a not fuck this up but i'm not seeing anything that's pressing me out
Huh paintings are the same chairs the same dolls good everything that I have
seen so far has not happened I think it's a green the drawer is open
Yeah, alright. Everything's good. Please say 8. Please say 8. Yes! Okay. Oh, Morty!
Dang, free win.
Wait, did I win?
Oh shit, final, final floor I think.
How much crap should I lose?
Wait, I'm- I'm fuckin' moving?
What the hell?
Damn, they've got mirror physics!
Hey!
My face.
It's not even plugged in.
Oh God, it's... me.
Episode one of four complete.
GG's next.
Brother High's Fah restaurant.
Oh, this is a free to play game.
Oh no, this game. Apparently everyone's already played all these shitty games I've played.
play them five months later well yeah but I also find it interesting that
everyone's a variety streamer now it seems like everyone queues all this
shit
this game contains some sensitive content and themes which may be
disturbing or offensive to some players the storyline is inspired by real event
I, I don't care.
Get away from my soda slot, guys. I'm stealing my shit.
It's true.
Settings, full screen.
Okay.
Don't go full screen.
Back.
So in my volume mixer, I'm looking at the game.
It is an indie Vietnamese horror game about running a pho restaurant. We just didn't want it like that's
Why is it called that in my fucking volume mixer? I
Really love eating pho more than my food. No, I love both when I grow up
I'll open a pho restaurant so I can eat pho anytime I want
Oh, and what about your promise to inherit your father's legacy that?
Let if you do open a foot for a show, what will you do?
Maybe I'll name it
Do I get the decide?
Then the other one...
I don't know, I don't know
I don't know
I don't know
I don't know
I don't know
I don't know
Hell yeah!
Okay. Today is my grand opening day. I should review my notebook one last time before starting
work. All right. Smooth as butter. Actually, there's no settings tab. Cannot lower my mouse
sensitivity. I will deal with it then.
Main dishes, rare beef, pre-cooked beef, beef balls, rare beef balls.
Fuh without onions, pilotless fuh.
Side dishes, cold rice, something, oh.
Cold rice and then a bowl first, place beef.
Note, if you fall out of map, that's not a bug.
That is Vietnamese thingy feature.
escape to teleport back. How do I close this space? Okay. Oh, there's a
FU restaurant here. Why didn't I know? It just opened today, sir. Oh, so I'm the
first customer today. Yes, the very first customer of the stall. Then I'll have
have one bowl of rare beef and three to tie. Yo, yo, I don't know if it is. Okay, let me
check my journal here.
Okay, rice noodles and bowl, then the beef.
Okay, what does he want again?
Rare beef, uh, okay, so I take...
Bull.
And then I take...
Noodles.
Doesn't he take rare beef?
Where beef fought in three at a time?
I guess it's beef?
And then
plus
three
yo-tie. What is a yo-tie?
Oh, one.
I think that's it.
Huh?
I lost I got to keep Mr. Gold how'd he get off his
How do you do that?
Alright, well, let's get the bowl.
Bang.
Noodles.
Beef.
That shit.
Wrath.
Dog?
Stay.
One bowl of well done beef with lots of onions.
No rice.
got it precooked beef uh wait he says lots of onions but i think i just give him the
same fucking amount right?
pre-cooked onions, broth, how are you gonna pay the fire is delicious thank you
Thank you sir, this is the only photo I shot in this village.
Let's give you a look at my morning jogging routine, I'll come here often.
Great.
Can I help you?
Do I have to like, split his money?
Where the fuck you? Oh
Okay, I got it nods
I paid so his change should be 35 K right
Dog? Dog, hey!
How damn!
Wanna grab a drink?
Congratulations on the opening of your restaurant. I've come to grab a bowl. Thank you village chief. Please come in
Before I wanted you to feel like I could only call a shipper walk outside the village
It's great to have a pleasure in here now. I have a bowl of rare beef and five you ties
Okay
So bowl
Noodles.
How many fucking yo-dime? Five?
Fatty?
Dog? Stay.
Are those just hot dogs?
I don't know what they are.
One rare beef, cold rice.
Alright.
How does the cold rice go in?
I guess, I think rice is served separately.
Okay, rare beef balls.
So, bang, bang, cold rice, what's it missing?
I've got his spa how do I remake the ball I don't know how to do it
okay so we add the noodles rare beef balls I mean beef balls I don't think
add rare beef there is no rare beef is pre-cooked there's beef it's all rare so
beef balls noodles and then I add the green onion and whatever and then I add
the fucking broth
what
is it bugged I can't add any shit here it's actually fucked up no you just suck dude I
I don't think so.
Buh.
Beef balls.
Onions and shit.
Roth. The broth doesn't get at it.
Yeah, it's cooked.
Only pre-cooked beef is cooked. Well then how the fuck do I cook? I haven't had to cook it this whole time
It gets cooked in the fucking broth
That's why the meat is cut so thin
Pre-could-be if I'm just gonna try and see what happens, then work.
it's broken it's just fucking broken I don't say
okay throwing that there bowl fa he falls dang the broth works now and then
fish you want cold rice that's it how do I deliver this to him why can't I
deliver this forgot the beef you fucking idiot no it's beef balls
Bull! Plus fuck it, I do beef and balls. Maybe you're right. Maybe I'm the idiot.
What I literally called beef balls. So rare beef balls. Not rare beef and beef balls. Whatever.
Rice this works. I'm gonna be so mad. I hate the game the game is wrong game is wrong not me
Think you're fucking food dog
God damn it dog stop it stay
Hey.
Why are there no other pho restaurants?
Isn't that a good thing?
Now the whole village will come to your restaurant.
Also, hmm, actually you're not the first person.
What do you mean?
I mean, there was a pho restaurant here before.
I'm old, my mind doesn't remember anything anymore,
but I'm sure you don't need to worry about it.
Oh, that's right.
All right, I was just asking for fun.
Is that so?
Well, I'm leaving now.
I'll come again another time.
Okay, bye.
Hey, me.
50K.
30k change dog I can't I access the dog there we go place
Jesus fuck this guy paid a lot what that's 78,000 in change
You know, he paid 22, yeah.
Okay.
This dog is ridiculous.
Oh, I like one rare beef,
plus some cold rice and five of your two twos.
Okay.
Simple.
Rare beef.
Wait, noodles first, right?
Bang, bang, bang, bang.
And a cold rice and a half towel.
Is that not it?
He wanted five doesn't say that but
Okay
All right, what do you want? Precooked beef, uh, easy.
Can I ask you something? I heard the village chief say there used to be a
flood restaurant in the village right? That's right if I'm not mistaken that
restaurant used to be right here. What a coincidence! Could you tell me more about
that? It was a long time ago about 10 years I think so no one remembers or
mentions it anymore. The former owner says or was just like you he came to the
The village opened a restaurant, business was booming, then suddenly one day, the restaurant
hung a closed sign and the owner vanished without a notice.
No one in the village knows why, and since then, no new Fudd restaurant has ever appeared.
Yep, and the village isn't that big with a few shops.
And after the incident with the old Fudd restaurant, a lot of strange rumors appeared.
What rumors?
Some people in the village rumored that this place is haunted, and anyone who does business
here will face misfortune, and the owner of the Fudd restaurant from back then was
curse and died without a trace. Ha, I think those things are nonsense if we are on a
spout business. There's nothing to worry about. Anyway, I'm heading home now. Bye.
Okay, great. Love that.
I think I'm done.
I think that's a pretty solid first.
Sir smoking isn't allowed in my shop so what you think this dump has rules please
put out your cigarette or smoke outside put out my ass you want me to smash your
face in don't get smart with me what would you like to eat sir eat your crap
I don't want your shitty noodles I'm here to tell you this you owe me a tax
got it everyone in this village who wants to do business peacefully must pay
tribute to me I don't like having my patience tested but since you're new
here I'll give you some time to prepare remember that kid if you don't comply
deal with the consequences I don't want to breathe this filthy dumps air for
another second. Interesting. Solid first day, though. Not bad. Oh, we're still on day one.
Aside from that psychos afternoon, the first day went pretty well. That's what I said.
Managed to observe quite a few people in the village. Hope you want to work on them tomorrow.
to clean up okay what all goes into cleaning up so why is there a picture of someone's
Who knows what this says?
Oh, trash.
But where does this go?
Yeah, that's an invisible wall, so not that way.
Aha!
What?
What were they doing?
Close up and get ready to rest.
Okay, I guess that's all the cleaning there is, so...
Oh! Hey, you little punk! The shop's closed already, sir.
I told you, I didn't come here to eat noodles. You've had plenty of time to think, now give me your answer.
Hand over the money, or die.
Refuse. Okay, I'll give you the money, but first I'll have to tell your boss, Mr. Geo.
Who? Geo Fett? Oh, I just owned him hard.
That was pretty sick.
Okay.
Today morning, the city of Hanoi has caused a serious fire in a store, causing a real disaster.
The fire was set up by the authorities.
The officials said that the fire was on fire for a long time.
The authorities said that the fire prevention police and rescue teams were at the scene
in collaboration with the authorities and the firemen.
The fire was almost extinguished by the morning.
The source of the fire was set up because of the gas.
The fuck.
Rules and consequences. Well, that's it. GG's. Alright, I will be on tomorrow.
Tomorrow might be path. Is that a Dark and Darker or Warcraft 3? I don't know.
But GG's everyone. G fucking G's. So until then, peace out.