sodapoppin
Wow Forever panels, GTA RP, Poker Practice | !merch !podcast !gamersupps
09-15-2026 · 6h 24m
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All right, yo, oh, force an intro, uh, yeah, I guess, you know, I, he claims to
Classic music let's go Adam on release today. Wow. I won't be playing it
Ah
Well, I mean today is kind of similar to yesterday at Swan Lake. What is Swan Lake?
Classical bangers Swan Lake
Wow.
Wow.
Anyways.
Important peek-a-clip.
Oh, a lot of important peek-a-clip here.
Okay, hang on.
Let me get everything on.
Oh, no, I had my camera on all night.
Oh, fuck.
Hopefully it's fine.
Okay
Oh, I think I've seen this dude. This was an insane fumble. This was nuts
Watch this. This is brutal
I was not talking either of you, but that's all right. I know well, I'm just wait. What do you guys do that?
Would you guys want to?
Right there
Brutal absolutely brutal
But either way very good stuff love that
So I've got like
It's currently 1245. I need to be on GTA RP in a little over an hour
So I have an hour and 15 minutes and I need to get on GTA RP
I
Mean I sound sounds like it's I'm forced to like I want to play GTA RP
It's just I'm over fucking whelmed with different things to do like there's still blitz kind of talk about it's only have an hour
There was a panel that someone recommended that I go watch because I didn't get to see it
there was a hardcore panel I didn't get to watch it and
There was a
Panel where they showed like the the graphic overhaul. I
Wanted to see that one as well
So I want to see the graphics panel and the hardcore panel and maybe there's more to I didn't get to see at all
Because I had to leave early and so I'm sitting there on a flight and there was no Wi-Fi in the fucking airport
Another key important peek a clip. Okay checking this one hang on
Is that Jackie Chan next to Supa, no that's Channelhead, they're going to be...
Channelhead has a nice looking suit.
What?
Is that Jackie Chan?
Well, I mean, you know, Chan, watch this first.
Okay, hold on, what are y'all linking me?
Oh, the Legend of Zelda Ocarina of Time, Mr. Anuma Gameplay Demonstration.
What the fuck?
Oh, this is gameplay. Okay. I am gonna watch this because I'm actually very interested. This is my childhood game
but then
after we play
Or I play GTA roleplay at 545 I have a poker coaching session
So I said this before but I have to I signed up for this months ago
And I probably still would say yes because they're not necessarily paying me to just play
But if I win my first round I get $50,000
It is a 1v1 between me and XQC. He doesn't need the money. Surely he throws please so yeah
I said fucking yes
But my requirement and this is gonna be kind of exciting. I'm just again overwhelmed with too many things to do
I have a coaching session that I have to do tonight and I get to do it with
Garrett Adelstein. I'm probably saying that wrong. He's like a professional poker player
Do you need the money? I'm not I don't have a hundred million fucking kick deal. All right
Yeah, I would use the 50 grand. I don't need it, but I'd like it sue me
So all I gotta do is beat Felix and then I go to the next round and I'm not sure what the next round
I think it's probably like four players
Something like that and if I win that it's like
250,000 but I mean gee all I gotta do is beat Felix. That's it
So and tonight I have a coaching session and my brother Ryan. He's a big-time poker player
He's fucking calling me. He's like dude, dude, dude the whole tournament's a bunch of noobs if you just put in the time
I'll coach you we'll do a session. We'll teach you this we'll teach you that we'll get you I guarantee you you can win
You just got to trust me so Ryan wants to do a coaching session as well
But tonight Garrett he's a professional poker player at 545
I'm doing a one-hour coaching session with him the guys never use discord
So I don't know how this is gonna play out, but I got him on I had to fucking talk with him through email
mail which is insanity. I haven't done that ever. Got him on Discord, got him added, and
he's like, so how does this work? I'm like, I'll call you, bro. Alright, I'll call you.
And he's like, okay. So that's where we're at. I don't know how that's gonna play out.
Um, yeah, that's where that's everything going on. So I don't have a lot of time. I want
to watch this, and then I want to watch some WoW panels, and then I gotta go on GTRP. It's
just we're going in.
I'm going to show you a game that was announced this past June for the Nintendo Switch 2 system.
Probably going to skim through it because I really don't care what they say.
The Legend of Zelda, Ocarina of Time.
An adult link, served as a defining moment for the series.
I don't need to see the old games.
We've been developing a remake of this game for the series 40th anniversary, creating...
Okay, I know that already.
This is the Legend of Zelda, Ocarina of Time for Nintendo Switch 2.
people hate the graphics of this they're like oh Barbie doll and yeah I see what
they're saying but I don't fucking care it looks fine to me. Currently I'm in a
location called Kokiri Forest. As you can see the visuals have been completely
redone. This is how our hero Link looks in the game. We had many discussions
about what visual style we should use for this game. And equipment have also
seen all this seen this it's Saria link's childhood friend she's always thinking of link
we've added quite a lot of new dialogue for the characters so that their personality is
showing even more okay let's keep going i want to see the running animation i haven't seen this
okay here i'm going to demonstrate one of the newly added actions in this game okay link can now
jump at the press of a button like this. It's insane that you could I just realized
yeah the only way you could jump here you just have to run right you just have
to fucking run it auto jumps right now you can just jump on command wow the
tech is insane places with gas yeah that's needed thank god and jump again
to cross them just like with the camera jumping might seem obvious for those of
who have played recent games in the series but in the Nintendo 64 you'd
automatically jump when you got close to an edge
edge so jumping by pressing a button is a major change okay by the way
splish we fell into the water but it's fine link and swim you can also swim
faster same swim anime oh something below like you see here you can dive
under water since we have a few rupees let's stop by the store this is where
you buy your shield right hello hey you gotta buy that you're all sorts of things
for sale it's important to be prepared for your adventure so let's see no
wasted wasted by the shield great they can stun enemies so if you find any I
I recommend collecting lots of them.
I want to see the combat and then I'm closing this.
Yeah and then it stuns it, right? And then it dies to one hit. Makes like stand straight up.
Take that!
So it's the same.
Okay.
Got the marbles thing that's gonna make me fucking blow my head off a bit.
I know it's for kids.
go here's the treasure chest let's open what do you think is inside isn't it the
slingshot yeah we got the slingshot it's useful for hitting faraway objects
I want to see you using motion controls like this if you press the targeting
button we used earlier. So you'll be able to aim pretty quickly. It's in fire. Okay,
we want to get back to the end. So do we ever see adult legums curious? You can spot a volcano
called death mountain. This looks sick. Hello. You need to know where to go. There's a new
feature we recommend using. I mean, I don't know if it like is great graphics, but I don't
for me it's like this is how i pictured the game would look when i went back to it you know five
years ago i was like oh i love this game as a kid it's so magic and i look and like what the
fuck are these triangles this is ugly things always look better than or the way you remember
things always look better this is how i pictured it look it's okay do you see it there's a cast
the distance. No shape, just below it.
There's a root lead there.
Okay, walk.
Oh, hold on.
A sprint!
Better than spamming roll.
And now, we've reached the castle gate.
Okay then, let's go inside.
Stop skipping.
I'm trying to get through it, because I'm not missing anything that I care about.
Okay, chicken.
We've added quite a few new details, including some parts that were merely backdrops at the time.
Yeah, there was like nothing back here.
There's that fucking freak.
Yeah, that...
Hold on.
yep that's the same motherfucker I remember this freak right here same face
and everything it's good I like that town you can hear gossip from the townsfolk
and play minigames in shops I don't miss all the place where you can take a
break during your adventure I think there might be a few players who will
spend quite some time here these two are arguing now can you tell that the sun
is setting and night is falling in the original game time actually stopped
flowing whenever you were in town but in this game time marches on no matter
where you are interesting
okay we're back in Hyrule Field it's nighttime now she's not here to introduce
the most important item in this game it's the ocarina of course play it and
different things can happen. Let me show you.
This tune is called...
Who's that little fucking zazz at the end there?
And voila! It was evening, but now it's day time. Mysterious, isn't it?
In this game, certain events only happen during the day or night, so please try out different things.
I don't believe y'all did the original have that original Sun song
No, the dude it kind of holds it there now y'all are wrong mysterious
like that storm oh my god you're fucking right I'm actually high hang on
fuck alright this tune is called Sun song and voila it was evening but now it's
In this game, certain events only happen during the day or night, so please try out different things.
Now, how do you think this plays out in the Ocarina of Time speedrunning community, the three people that are left there?
Do you think they keep speedrunning the old game or they all pivot to this one?
What happens?
both I mean we'll see I don't know about both we'll see the way there's a fun
little feature with the ocarina unique to Nintendo switch to are you ready
there's an ocarina in that controller
oh no
I'm sure you'll look at that.
I'm a song Link's learned and he'll play it.
And here's an ocarina like the one in the game.
It'll be available for purchase on Nintendo's dollars minimum.
Let me play it for a bit.
The game can even respond to instruments.
Oh, and when you play this song, a horse will come running over.
Link can run a horse as an adult.
But I'll leave that for you to try out for yourselves.
Let's stop here.
What did you think?
Don't ask me. Okay, that's sick. See I'm actually hyped about that now moving on to the next thing
World of fucking Warcraft
Where can I find the graphics panel where they showed updated graphics? You can see adult link here
Okay, well give me the fucking panel for that surely. It's here Savics
You can log your ass back to era
You fucking sad ass, here you go.
Don't play ara by yourself.
Oh, looking for me.
Anyone want to raise it?
Okay, it's not wrong.
Oh shit, it's old link.
That works.
Alright, YouTube video clicking.
Please don't be porn.
33 minutes evolving a timeless world. I didn't get to see this panel
What's up Blizzcon? I
Want you all to imagine dustwood?
You all know dustwood, right? It's a dark creepy forest crawling with spiders and wolves
Haunted with undead ghouls and skeletons
The guards of the night watch torches in hand patrol dangerous roads
Keeping their eyes out for a certain abomination
There's dilapidated buildings, abandoned farms.
That's what it said. You can terrifying place.
Now, now that you have that image in your head,
let's take a look at the real thing.
Take your time.
Boom.
What? I don't see anything.
Whoa.
There we go.
Alright.
So we have classic duskwood here, right?
Darkshire, town square, around 2 in the morning.
It's awesome, right?
Iconic, definitely a fan-favorite zone.
But it might not be as dark or creepy as you remember.
When I remember duskwood, I imagine the light of the full moon
illuminating an eerie cold fog.
I mean, what's the tech issues come on?
Oh, whoa, whoa, there we go.
Damn.
Oh, my God, look at the moon, look how vibrant that is.
I'm just going to let that sit for a couple of seconds, yeah?
All right.
Okay.
I remember graveyards teeming with skeletons.
the dim warm glow of torches guiding my past.
I'm gonna pause.
So I haven't gotten to see this yet,
but I see a lot of people hyping it up.
My, what's the word?
Being cynical, I'm hoping they show things
rather like outside of just a static image
or a static location.
I just walk through it.
Hopefully they show something like that.
Cause that's the reality, right?
They do.
Okay, then they must be confident. It must be that fucking good.
I remember the silhouettes of terrible creatures lurking in the fall.
Yeah, sick.
This feeling of dread and danger around every single corner.
And of course, most of all, I remember constantly looking over my shoulder in the Ravenhill Cemetery,
hoping I don't run into this guy and potentially lose another one of my hardcore characters.
Now, this is the Dustwood that I remember, and this is what we're so excited to talk
about here today, how with WoW forever, we are evolving our timeless world.
But before we jump into that, let me bring my buddy Jason out onto the stage, and we'll
do some quick introductions.
Okay, so just I'm gonna say this now. I'm probably playing Alliance
Just saying
I don't give a shit about the undead paladins. I think it's cool great Proudie
I'm actually no actually I'm so annoyed that there's gonna be so many paladins are the most unfun class to go against because bubble sucks
Whenever I see a paladin, I know they're just gonna be
Well, I got to get through bubble and then there are eight seconds of immunity and now they're gonna have lay on hands because it's 20 minute cool down
So it's another fucking health bar and now bop is off cool down
So they're gonna be immune again, and I don't know if I'm just gonna be so annoyed with all the fucking alliance
So or with all the paladins, so I'm not looking forward to that, but
Just looking at this duskwood bullshit. I
Don't really know how they can make the barons look that much better
I mean, really, I don't know.
I mean, I guess maybe some, you know, rays of light and stuff, but that duskwood is soaked.
That's sick.
What a fun place to fucking show off.
Whatever.
Let's move on.
So, my name is Matt Heyman.
I'm a lead environment artist on World of Warcraft.
And I've been at Blizzard for a long time.
I've been at Blizzard working on wow for 15 years, which sounds like a long time, right?
But believe it or not 15 years ago. We were starting production on miss a pandaria
He's got to be older than he looks super good for his age. Fuck you launch back in 2004 when I was in high school
And my favorite way to play wow is hardcore classic, but I cannot wait until hardcore hits wow forever
Like this guy still gets carted for his ID Gary Jason Scott. I'm a lead software engineer
I worked with the graphics and engine team.
I've been with World of Warcraft for about three years,
but that was after more than 20 years
in visual effects and animation for film and television,
both on the art side and on the technology side.
But my personal history of WoW goes back a lot farther
than the three years I've been at Blizzard.
All the way back to the beta.
My man.
Back to May 2004, this is my actual WoW beta invite.
to invite you can see the date right there so awesome my appreciation for
while long predates my being able to work on the game itself all right back
to Matt what if I could show them hi listen here's my resume all right back
to Matt what does it mean to evolve a timeless world well as I'm sure you've
we've seen so far at the show that we're making some aesthetic changes to the world of Azeroth.
So let's start by looking at our overall visual goal for WoW Forever.
Azeroth as you remember it.
Sounds cool, right?
But what does that mean?
That's what we wanted to take that original vanilla version of Azeroth and combine it
with the version that lives in our heads.
That's exactly what I said about the fucking Ocarina of Time.
It doesn't look how you actually remembered it, but again, like, you know, rose-tinted
glasses and time and whatever.
Fuck yes.
Where our experiences, nostalgia, and our imagination all shape the way that we remember
it.
Yeah.
So, how did we go about doing that?
What did that process look like?
Well, first, we started by looking at all the content coming to WoW forever.
We knew that we were going to have a bunch of brand new zones that players had never
seen before, like the Zephyrus Isle, starting zone for the new Skyborne Race, which is still
playable here today.
If you haven't checked it out, it's literally right back there.
And then we have the River Glaze, another brand new zone coming to the coast of the Eastern
Kingdoms right next to the Red Ridge Mountains.
will probably check this out around the mid, you know, level 30 area. And then we knew that
we wanted to expand and alter some of our existing areas. Like how the city of Dalaran
is now fully present right here next to the alt-track mountains.
God.
No longer hiding in its purple bubble.
Did they show Dalaran at all?
And then of course, finally, we have all of our existing zones, around 40 of them.
I
Actually really like that work after every logo with the infinity behind it. So I was looking at the logo
Damn, that's there more
So you've probably heard this before a couple times here at the show, but we consider the world look at the lights coming through that
Actually, so pretty
Fuck yeah, I should be able used to be so many. Oh man tie that with the music
I'm with it
be our main character. Yuck. I mean, I shouldn't say yuck. I mean, I still love it. But I like to
consider it as a cast of characters with each and every zone having its own unique color palette.
This is this is my actual childhood leveling area. Mood. Atmosphere. Look at that. Like kind of purple.
Having its own unique color palette. The mountains in the background look what everything
looks better in the background compared to like this hold on it's all yeah this
is shit man all right so that created a bit of a challenge for us at the fog
effect okay brand new zones that players have never seen before and make them
feel like something that's always been there while simultaneously yeah that
fog is crazy how good it is new life into them to really turn them into
Fuck.
Oh, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, I wanted the Seafeld.
Hello?
No, fuck you.
So that's the new, ooh, the goo.
The goo looked pretty good.
We, let me see the goo, god damn it.
Okay, here's bubbles.
Okay.
Yeah, there's no bubbles in the new one come on. Oh, there's a little small in it. They're very minor
They're kind of there and then bang change
Yeah, there you see them there we go
Our art and engineering teams
Collaborated to develop a bunch of new rendering updates for while forever
They would help us enhance the look of the world new art assets
Okay, new art assets to build out these new spaces our new zones our new dungeons and they're gonna show the new assets cuz
Now, changing a world that players have cherished for such a long time has risks,
and so we wanted to make sure that we approached it carefully and responsibly.
So we developed a guiding artistic principle that we followed every step of the way.
Everything must be authentic. Everything we create, everything we change, everything we add,
That's a great word, but show the actual art assets.
Authentic to our world, authentic to our art style,
and most importantly, authentic to all the memories
that we have of that vanilla Azeroth.
We're not here to change things just
for the sake of change.
Sure, OK.
We know that you all love the vanilla world,
and so it's really important to us that we respect that.
Now, let's take a look at a quick example.
Here we have vanilla Durotar outside the Airport Amar.
What's that one command like the fucking glow that as soon as you log in as a troll and an orc you got to type that shit in because it just kills your eyes
They have not typed in that fucking glow yet. I love Zerotar, right?
Zerotar fans maybe? Okay, cool. I grew up in this place.
It might be tempting when I get new tech or new tools to go in and just change everything because it's fun and exciting
As an example, maybe the whole zone is changed to have a cool blue atmosphere
It feels natural and realistic, but that's not Durotar.
Or we could go even more extreme and change the atmosphere to a foggy, green atmosphere.
But again, neither of these are authentic to Durotar.
I got a showing different choices.
The first approach is to go in with purpose and lean in and push the fantasy that Durotar
already has.
Durotar is an arid but vibrant landscape.
It's the background that's the key.
on the back, dude. Oh, that is sick. You can see it from Org. That's fucking awesome.
Dry cracked earth and a hot, sweltering atmosphere. You see, authenticity was so important to
creating a Durotar that players remember. Now, authenticity was equally important, even
I imagine when it came to creating new that is sick for while forever
You see our models and textures are the foundation of while's art style
And it's an art style that has changed over the years with every expansion
But for while forever we wanted to maintain that iconic vanilla look
There's an edge and grittiness to the way those assets look and all right
Warcraft 3 reforged died for this
Okay, that was a sacrifice that Warcraft 3 made so they fucking knew and you can see with the other the new Warcraft 3 little fucking patch
Okay, they learned there as well, and they did a whole nother like rehaul of Warcraft 3 graphics. They knew
Don't change it. Just update it. It died for this
Just feels like Warcraft
So, if we summarize, the way that we created, wow, as we remember it, is a little bit of
old and a little bit of new.
We're creating assets that maintain that timeless, iconic look, and we're bringing in new rendering
updates to help breathe new life into our world.
So now, to give us a more detailed look at those rendering updates, I'm going to pass
it over to Jason.
Thanks, Matt.
So...
All right, resume, man.
To achieve the visuals we wanted for WoW Forever, we were able to innovate in several different
rendering technology areas, and each of these was chosen with the goal of being authentic,
as Matt said, with enhancing the look of the game so that you can be that much more immersed
in the world of Azeroth.
So we're going to look at these technologies in three groupings, fog, lighting, and water.
And now each of these is actually made up of multiple technologies.
We're going to use these groupings to help illustrate things.
And as I talk, we're going to play some examples.
You have a better idea of what it is that we've done.
And there's one more thing.
These aren't just individual items, individual components that we decide to work on.
Artists and our engineers collaborated to bring them all together with the goal of giving us the look of wow forever
So let's get into the details. All right first. Let's talk about fog. Okay, we're getting the fog has been integral to
Wow's look since the very beginning
All right, if we look at some examples from
vanilla wow we can
Use that to understand how we got over the years the waters
We're using the right place to create zones like this one
A gloomy, spooky, dark swamp like Duswalla Marsh.
Fog helped us create the mood and the ambiance we wanted to provide for the players.
Or, we might create a zone like this one.
Come on, panel, it's work.
This one.
Right?
We use fog to make a light and airy atmosphere here in Dunbaro, in the mountains around Iron
Forge.
can use fog to create vistas or give a sense of depth. If you didn't know, each zone had
its own unique fog created by our art teams. I did not know that.
When we go back to the beginning, back to the launch of WoW, we use fog out in the distance.
So these are all things that I feel like I just don't appreciate because you just kind
of subconsciously accept it. You don't really get to talk about it because no one fucking,
it's a subconscious thing. So I'm not gonna know shit here.
For a particular purpose, related to game performance. So if you didn't know, we have
limitations on our view distance or our draw distance at the beginning. That's the distance
at which from the player, we're not really able to draw what else is out there in the
world. And so in order to not really show that to the players, we would hide that in
wall of fog. And we have some other examples of this. As we stand in the
Barrens, you should be able to kind of look over and see into Durotar, maybe a
little to Azhar. Oh shit. We need to be able to control those sight lines for
those reasons. And over the years we were able to improve that view distance and
work on that fog and approve it, but we didn't want to be bound by any technical
limitations anymore. We wanted to creatively control what we were able to
to show you out in the distance.
In addition, with fog, we wanted to have pockets of fog
that maybe you could walk through,
we could surround a player,
or maybe we could hide things in the fog.
We wanted to be able to shine light through it,
or have it have shadows,
or have it move, have dust and dirt and particles and texture.
And now all these things can be done
in a system called volumetrics, or volumetric fog.
And so it became our goal to replace our original
with this new volume fog technology.
And Vile Forever has given us that chance.
It's got fogs.
Our engineers and our artists have worked together
to develop a system to control fog like we never have before.
Ooh.
Now we can increase that sense of creepiness
in Dusk Wall.
Look at those trees.
It really highlights the wickedness of them, I guess.
And we can see the effect of wind in a zone.
Oh.
We can feel the texture of dust.
Oh, I didn't even think about that.
We can see it sweep across the plains of the western plague lands.
If you didn't know, each zone has its own unique wind as well.
Shit, okay.
We've also been able to adjust that sight line between the zones that we were talking about.
And so now, when we do stand here in the Barrens, and we do look over into Dorotar, we can start to make out land formations.
We can start to see into Azshara. And as we look up, we can even see Nordrasil atop Mount Hyjal.
From the Barrens.
This gives us a sense of the expansive world that we have in Azeroth.
That looks so good. Look at the trails. They're like highlighted more.
It's back in the wetlands
From now we're not bound by that view distance. Oh, we can see the backs of the mountains of Dunmeroe
Damn, and we stand and we look across medieval harbor. I
Mean so they kind of had to go back home
So
This is something you'd realize when you would like fly on a flying mount you would look down and you would just see these
massive terrain changes that felt
really awkward and unnatural and it the game just looked shit because you weren't supposed to see it
from that perspective and yeah you have flight paths but they're aware they're they're controlled
flight paths are static for a reason uh to hide it so this means with this increased view distance
they probably had to go back and really polish a lot of these different terrain changes
so that you can actually see in the distance or maybe they didn't and it's going to look like
shit. I don't know. It looks like it looks pretty good, especially, you know, cold, you
know, mountains in the top. It makes sense. So we'll see other stuff.
We look across Menethal Harbor. That's no joke. We look across the Bairdon Bay. We can start
to make out the violet citadel of Dalaran in the Altrack Mountains. Damn.
Our new fog is one of the biggest visual changes in WoW's history.
Okay, now in some of these examples you might see rays of light were commonly
called God rays and you can see this really vividly here in Ashen Vale. Yeah?
Yeah. These rays of light come from our ability to shine light through the fog
in a process called scattering. You can see this on the path with the lights on
the path as well and the size and the shape of those rays come from what's
Blocking the light or simply what's casting shadows into the fog
Whether that be from the trees or mountains or anything else
Now these rays are incredibly beautiful and we're so excited we get to bring
Sorry, you want to toggle this off? No way. So this is a natural place to go to our second set of technologies. I mean
And I everyone's got their opinion, but people want to toggle this off
What I
I mean, that's fine.
Really?
I'm going to call him.
It's really important.
I just, it's just a brief, brief, brief question.
I just have to ask his opinion of why and hear him justify it.
C-Live, he's an obvious C-Live.
Can I answer it?
Hey, I know you're watching a panel and I'm going to let you get back to it.
I just, someone told me this and it's, I have to ask you,
Okay, do you want to toggle off the new like art and the god rays and the fog you would prefer that toggled off I
Would prefer a toggle so it's up to the user whether they want it on or off
Just a toggle just the option or if you want like an OG
Warcraft 3
Experience you know like you know in Warcraft 3 you can go the new graphics of the so what would you what would you play as?
As to be honest, I'd probably play with the new home for a little bit and I still a bug for a little bit and then
And then when if I found something that bugged me enough or I was like crap
I want more nostalgia or like I want to just go back then maybe I would turn them off
But I would probably start with them on this makes sense people obviously people were misunderstanding in my excite
I'm sorry took you away from your panel people saying you wanted to play with a little nuance like here's a thing
I'm such a classic graphics guy like when I played Warcraft 3
I just love like the low poly art, but I played runescape. I thought it was sick like so
I love like the low poly stuff, but even me. I'm like, okay, fine. It looks really good
You know, okay, it's like would you how would you prefer here? Would you prefer like if it if it's impossible to add a toggle?
Let's say it somehow affects the world and it the way something it fucks things up
You can't do it toggle because everyone needs to be in line. Yeah, what would you want crap classic or the new update?
For the world, I guess then the guest then it's the new one
Why does that kill you have you if you watch?
It looks amazing and look like look I hate to say it but it looks amazing. It looks fucking sick
Okay, it's good. It looks really good. Okay, if I can only have one I guess the new one, but hey, but I agree
Okay, now that I know your take is you just want to toggle that makes more sense
I just had to clarify stars. Well, let's you get back to it
All right, thanks, bro.
GG.
Nice.
Had to know.
It's insanity.
To the game.
All right.
Back to this.
So this is a natural place to go to our second set of technologies, lighting, all right?
So as you saw in Ashtonville, we have some beautiful new lighting that comes with our
new fog.
But in trying to achieve the lighting, we realize there are a couple of additional areas
we need to adjust.
So I'm going to use some time-lapse footage from the Badlands to help explain what I mean,
all right?
So here we have the badlands in Vanilla Wow.
And we're showing some of the sun and the moon
that sets and rises behind the mountain.
At the risk of destroying the illusion,
we're going to point out a couple of things,
a couple of attributes to illustrate
what we needed to adjust.
So in order to talk about lighting,
you need to be able to talk about shadows.
In fact, there's two pieces of shadows we're going to talk about.
So let's start there.
The first is if we look at the mountain,
we see as the sun and the moon go up and down
behind the mountain.
see a little bit of some rays that we had but they're not really getting properly walked or
occluded by the mountains. The shadows aren't moving by the way. The second is if you look at the
shadows from the tower as the moon and the sun change position in the sky those shadows don't
do anything. In fact those shadows shouldn't even be there some of the time because the mountains
should be shadowing as well. Now these kinds of qualities came from the fact that historically
our suns and moons position in the sky did not actually line up with the light we were casting into the world.
Now, we've known this from the beginning, and a lot of you knew this, but with our new fog, this is going to become really, really obvious, right?
And while we did change some of that overwound's history and get some of the light to change position, it didn't really change that much and achieve what we wanted.
So now, let's look at wow forever.
Do you see as the Sun starts coming up to dawn as dreams of light just come popping over that mountain?
We had similar rays from the moon as well
And you can look at those shadows from the tower and from the mountain as they're getting properly
toggling this off
Nah, okay, let's look at another similar example this time in mode. Yeah, I'm playable really vanilla. Wow as it basically was on day one
And you can see those shadows from the trees aren't moving.
All right?
And again, later on, later expansions, they did move a little, but not very much.
And now again, while forever.
So to achieve this, that looks so good in Moldor.
Oh, I don't know what button I just pressed.
Oh man, I actually this is so minor, but I just love
Now that you have this crazy view distance. I love how much more I
Guess how much more the trails pop in a way?
To achieve this we need to change a couple of things. Maybe it's always popped that way. I just couldn't see that far
I don't know our world was properly shadowing, right?
We needed to make sure the mountains the terrain the land formations were properly
blocking the light as it was coming into the world.
And then secondly, we need to make sure
that the position of the sun and the moon
more closely aligned with the light that was coming in.
Now, there's still some creative
and artistic choices we make,
but this is so exciting
that makes the world that much more alive.
But there's another lighting aspect here
we have to talk about.
With all these new shadows from our fog, from our terrain,
our world had a chance of getting a little bit darker.
So let's talk about what that means.
So here in Elwynn Forest, there's always shadows,
whether it be from trees or something else.
So we're gonna make sure you see where those shadows are,
right?
And what we've done historically is we've filled in
those shadows with kind of a flat, low level of lighting
called ambient lighting.
And that's meant to simulate how light from the sky
or light that bounces around the world
fills in the dark areas, fills in the shadows.
But that ambient light never quite accomplished
what we were really wanting.
You'll see it is quite flat.
If you look under the stable, for example,
it should be significantly darker in there
because there's less opportunity for light to bounce inside.
What we really wanted was a way to calculate
how lighting is bouncing around the world.
When light hits a surface,
it picks up the color of that surface,
or they have less opportunity in a dark area.
This system where we have light that indirectly bounces
or indirectly illuminates something
is naturally called indirect illumination
or global illumination.
Right, so let me show you what that means in wow forever. Yeah, just show me
Oh, we use our global illumination system to fill in those shadows. It's really dark. It's more natural integrated immersive look
Immersive view to everything going in
You can even see some of the red light is that bounces off the top of the stables and hits the sides of the chapel
You can see green light is that filters through the from the sunlight filtering through the green leaves into the shadowed area behind the tree
right and you can see in the stable like everyone just got stealth I'll be honest
pretty dark right so that there's because there's less opportunity for that
light to bounce around in there so now if we compare these so you can see how it
was with our amp so here's the here's the min max in my brain and I'm worried if
you can toggle it off you gain more vision
that's not ideal
And I know people will do it. So that's fucking lame
Be at light versus with our global play games though. You'll see how much more life it brings as we look at that
Tells part of the ruin it we can actually
I mean age but you know still from Stranglethorne Vale and I like it's the same concept of like people turning their foliage to fucking zero
and then lowering their graphics for more FPS like you can call those people cringe all you want, but that's what and I
Would prefer you force players to take the more immersive world
My I would like to be forced. I don't want people to have any any form of advantage and yeah, it sucks
but the bottom left a
Visualization of the light that's bouncing in the world what was going on not the sunlight, but just like that's bouncing
You can see is the light bounces around it picks up so much green
You can pick, see little patches of red and brown from the path.
As we go down deeper into the jungle, you'll see how much naturally it gets dark from the light.
And you'll see patches as the sunlight punches through.
What is this bottom left cam? What is this? This is a fucking...
What?
More of that color that's coming through.
This allows our artists to craft the style, the lighting that we want in the zone.
And as we place the light in that environment,
the more natural reacting to how everything sits.
Here's another example.
This time, from the border between the Barrens and Ashen
Vale.
And this is time lapse footage.
So you can see how our global illumination system changes
as the time of day changes.
You'll see as how light starts to come through
in the screen right side.
And you'll see it has more and more light bounces
around the scene, picking up colors from the green leaves
and red leaves of ash and bale,
and just filling in those shadows so much more naturally.
So as you can see, in our world,
our light comes from the sun or other lights that we place,
and then the rest of the dark areas are filled in
by the sky and light bouncing around the world
from our global illumination system.
And we built a custom ray tracer,
built on a mix of existing ideas and new technologies,
and we're very, very proud of it.
But those amazing things is,
while we've designed this and it runs
on our recommended hardware requirements,
we've been able to optimize this,
and this one's completely
on our minimum hardware requirements as well.
So all Valve forever players get to enjoy this.
Fuck yes, okay.
Now, as we travel down the sub-curio-
Is there a way we can see minimum requirements?
I'm curious.
Like what's their minimum requirement?
How does Google it?
What are the minimum requirements for a PC in WoW forever?
Maybe it'll link me to something and we can fucking AI overview.
This is probably right, honestly.
8 gigabytes of RAM.
Okay.
With an SSD, 128 space, okay whatever.
Where's the fucking graphics card?
What the fuck?
Requirements for maximum performance?
No?
There's gotta be like a blizzard website.
Forever PC requirements.
This is a forum, fucking.
Am I stupid?
It's on the blizzard store.
Hold on, someone's linking me something.
Here we go.
I mean, am I just too dumb? I only know, like, names of video cards. Okay. Minimum.
DirectX 12 capable 4GB CPU. 10 series. What does this mean? I'm not a- I don't know what
this means. What is a 10 series? That's like a 1080? That's minimum? How expensive is a
ten eighty
nowadays
okay
a used in video will used
uh...
new old stocker third-party retailer this is from three hundred thirty to five
hundred dollars
not available yet i don't even know if you can get these nowadays
i bet there's like
what is the cheapest
available
graphics card you can buy today
probably like a three uh...
threesia thirty sixty
Curious
Okay, so they're like 300 bucks
I mean that's way beyond what you need as well inch. Okay, whatever
It's actually way better like actually more demanding than I thought it'd be ever here in a jarra
It's a natural
I'm out of touch, so I don't know what the average person's PC is. I'm very much out of touch technologies water
all right
Water is another rendering technology where we wanted to bring more life to the game
And there's a few characteristics. We wanted to hear
We want to work on the movement of the water from waves. Oh shit. Oh, a mistake Wow. Here we go. Alright
Water is another rendering technology where we wanted to bring more life to the game
And there's a few characteristics. We wanted to hear
We want to work on the movement of the water from waves wind the flow of water that looks awesome
We want to work on the color enhance that the look
How light hits it and the transparency when light comes off it and we want to work on the reflections
How and what water's reflecting man? I can't fucking wait the bait is in what two days
There's so many things. I wanted to test like I
I wonder if they did anything, you know when you're like swimming and your camera is just so annoying
When it's like just snapping up and down. It's so AIDS
I wanted to swim and kind of test and fuck around with that
I mean, I got I should start writing things down on a notepad
So let's first talk about movement. You can turn that off. It's still
Examples play through to show some of the controls that we can do that we can use actually don't know how they
We didn't have some movement in original Wow, but it wasn't quite what we wanted
Now we can control hold on hold on vanilla, but you can't even like what we want
Oh my god, you can actually see the like the surface level ground now
You can see it if you look over here on the right, but it's like so
Subtle its aids, but look at this
I mean compare
So it's it's not just the water looking better, but like the clarity of the water looks better
Out we can control underneath the size of waves and reflection. Oh my god and a reflection dude. Look at this flag. Oh
My god, yeah, whether it be a lake or an ocean. Let me go back to the comparison. Hold on dude
Holy shit this shit sucks, dude. It's horrible
We've been looking at this
We did have some movement in the original WoW in Zanilla, but it wasn't quite what we wanted.
It was fine, it got the job done though.
The size of waves, whether we might want to adjust that based on the size of the body of water,
whether it be a lake or an ocean, or the depth of water, we can adjust the wind.
Again, we said there's heat in every zone, and so we can pick that up and react.
Dude, do the waves affect the water?
All right, look at the way it's see if these water man. It's crazy. You have the different kinds of water life that we want
Another type of movement we have is the flow of water and you can see we did have some simple kinds of
Flow or movement in the water, but didn't really flow as a river
But now in mouth forever. Oh, we have those rivers flow down as we want them
They move
Following the path of the river
I mean, they've got this in retail right? I feel like I've seen retail water like that
As they hit rocks and creates foam and has some textural quality
So we can see as it interacts with the environment. No
Here's another example. I mean fucking the Redbridge Mountains. Yeah, I'll take it
See how big this river is how the water completely flows around
And our artists have full control over this
even against gravity because we actually have some magical rivers in Azeroth that go uphill. So.
Random, random opinion. I'm just going to gauge opinions here because I just got autistic. Would
you guys like it if when you're swimming in the direction with the water you gain a slight swim
speed increase and vice versa or no. I'm actually torn. I mean, I really, it's so minor. I just
engaging what y'all think in general. Vice versa means when you're swimming up river,
you're going to get a slight swim speed decrease. I don't know, maybe like a 10%. Oh God, man,
already so slow swimming up river let's say you had to I mean when would you have to swim up river
not a lot of moments but if you did oh that'd be so slow maybe not whatever who cares moving on
but now let's look at the look of the water and again we'll play some examples of the controls
that we can have and we worked with art to open up the controls we wrote a completely new water
shader we even had some artists do some paint over to show what we might want to be able to change
we can affect the density of the water and how light is absorbed and how it changes the colors
of objects underneath the water look at that green i see him changing it
reflecting hitting the surface of the water damn different depths you change how light is look at
that in creed you can see all the way down there now and then you so reflecting the surface of the
the water and at different depths to be able to control the color.
Maybe I'll actually do the STD water quest for once from murky to crystal clear.
And all right, onto our last part, reflections.
Again, we didn't really reflect anything at the beginning.
We couldn't.
Sorry, I have time lapse footage here.
So we can see even as the time of day changes, nothing's being reflected.
But as always, if we look here in WoW Forever, now we can properly reflect our entire environment
with us.
We can see it as the time of day changes here in time lapse footage.
Side by side, comparisons are brutal.
The movement of the water and all put together.
Now I should also mention, we can also reflect the sun and the moon.
And this has been a lot of fun for us.
We can see again how it was at the beginning.
And now we can get these amazingly gorgeous sunrises, sunsets, and moonrises and moonsets
as well.
So that covers just some of the rendering technology we've been able to introduce into
WALF forever.
So there's so many more areas we've been able to work on.
But let's look as we put it back together.
Matt?
Whoo. Thank you, Jason.
Cool shit, yeah?
All right. One thing I want to emphasize is that this isn't a filter or a switch that we just flip on and everything looks magically different.
We went in and meticulously recreated the lighting and the atmosphere from the ground up.
We took our original 1.12 vanilla debug client and used it as reference, as our ground truth.
We step through every single time of day, from midnight to 2 a.m. to noon to sunset to evening, everything.
People that do lighting don't get in it. Lighting is so fucking important, and it's such a subconscious thing, so good to these guys. Fuck! Lighting's crazy.
And try to match and recreate the original vibes that every single zone has.
Now, how about we go through that process together and build our own zone?
So let's bring back our old favorite dust wood. Yeah
Whoo. All right. So, okay. I want to see what that's like this place is so cool. There's no lighting. No fog
We just have flat models and textures like I said before this is our foundation of wow style
So let's turn down the lights and just add a little bit of moonlight to the scene
Here you can see it's dark if you're a fan of really dark nights and wow
this is probably what you've been looking for and
And I think it looks cool, but it's not playable.
It's a little too dark.
So let's bring in a bit more light.
So we're going to bring in some point lights.
These are lights that go on all of our different sources,
our windows, our torches, our lanterns.
It helps provide some visual breakup, some color distinction.
And honestly, it just looks really cool.
Now, let's bring in that global illumination
that Jason was talking about.
So our moonlight is hitting the ground.
It's bouncing and it's lifting up our shadows a bit,
adding a bit of color.
But we're missing a whole nother component.
We need some fog for our scene.
Let's add a base layer of fog.
So as you can see here, just adding in fog
makes the entire space feel darker.
Your ability to perceive details in those dark areas
just gets completely vanished by this thick fog.
Now, let's bring in some of the light scattering
that Jason talked about.
So now our moon is actually illuminating the fog the light scattering
crazy man you're in darkshire that's where it happens add some movements and
variations of the fog we're gonna bring in some noise to create that creepy eerie
moving mist but we're not done yet so we're gonna add in a little bit of
round to really amp up that spooky vibe we're getting close to being done and
And now we're going to bring in some of our post-process effects, some blooms, some color
correction, really push things, right?
It looks cool.
It's punchy.
It's vibrant.
But we've probably gone a little bit too far.
We've probably moved beyond what I would call the wow style.
We have too much contrast.
We can't really see what's going on.
So we're going to pull things back.
Make sure it's aligned with an authentic version of Dustwood.
All right.
So here we calm down some of the saturation,
turn down some of the bloom,
things are looking pretty good.
So let's check it against our original
classic version of dust wood.
And now let's flip it back to wow forever.
Yeah.
We still have Darkshire.
Yeah.
But again, when I look at this,
I'll be honest, I actually don't want it to be toggleable.
i would prefer it not to be toggleable you have
everyone's game looks
man i understand the character models of stuff i don't want toggleable i want
you forced to play like this in your game looks the same plus
again a lot of your streamers are sweaty fucking minmaxers so when you're
showing off the game and it's being i
should be told advertised
this is that that's what they're going to be seeing in the city sweaty minmax
gross shit
not like that
i'd rather
New players seeing this personally, and I personally rather it, and I am a classic Andy, so I don't my opinion.
It's still creepy. It's still moody. It still feels like the place that we remember, but it's really pushing that haunted spooky tendency.
But there's one step left that every artist should go through when lighting his own and that's taking the player perspective
It's really easy to light one shot like this and make it look cool
But it's important that we run around the game. We look at all the different areas make sure things are working
Oh, is this a new human male model because I haven't gotten to see they removed the bounciness from the dwarves right from the new models
I haven't gotten to see the other
models and how they reduced the bounciness so is this a new model like
Jason mentioned I mean it I can't tell it looks fine to me am I crazy that's old
I mean human male don't look at them very often I don't think I've ever played a
human male here in the open and that's fine to me I don't know I think maybe
it's that you move into the text as the canopy the trees are overhead there's
gonna be less light to bounce around. Things are gonna get dark. New model, old animation.
I think that's what it is though, right? You might just want to find a torch.
I mean, we'll have to see. I think night elves, like when it comes to their new model or the
modern model, the one that everyone hates, the night elf female isn't that bad. But Taryn,
for example, is hideous.
I'm playing.
Night Elf, so I actually may do the updated models.
I might be a full on.
Modern graphic mother fucker.
We'll see.
I might even with the fucking models straight up.
We'll see.
To carry along with you.
And as you can see, I obviously walk out in the farms and the.
But I'll see him fucking in two days, man.
We've got to keep forgetting.
It's right there who knows what we're gonna find it hasn't clicked to me yet now
This is the approach that we took for all of our zones in wow forever
Like I said we went through we tried to beta. Yeah, I know I mean I can test that stuff
I've been moved the atmosphere all the characteristics that make up these familiar places
And I want to assure you it's not just pretty sunsets
Every time of day has a different look a different feeling
as long as it's authentic to the original,
I think we did a pretty good job.
APPLAUSE
Oh, good. Let's wrap it all up.
So, as we wrap, Matt and I want to acknowledge
we didn't do all this just the two of us.
We had a very dedicated team who were so passionate
about crafting all the creative artistic decisions
decisions and underlying technology that brought all this together.
A lot of that team is here today.
So we'd love it if you give them a round of applause as they're here in the audience.
Unappreciated team.
Lighting is sick.
So with that, we are underappreciated that we got to share our effort on
evolving the look of wow forever.
And we're so excited for you to be able to go and experience this yourself.
We hope you got to play the demo while you're here at Buzz gone.
we hope you get to play the beta when it's released next week and we are so
excited for you to enjoy it when we launch Wow forever on November 4th we
hope you find your own visuals so on Vulp's link this to me what the fuck is
this Ward of Warcraft TBC classic plus Nvidia DLSS 5 looks crazy
what the fuck is this
What is this DLSS-5 I keep seeing just getting AI slop?
It looks weird, right?
I mean, it looks cool, but in actual practice, I bet it'd become kind of an eyesore over
time.
Maybe that looks really cool.
But I don't know, it looks kind of like an eyesore eventually.
Like it's cool for like the static images.
That's how I feel.
It's a filter.
This is a filter?
What?
Okay.
Weird.
It looks wrong.
Yeah.
And that's why I'm not really, it could be just because, you know, I'm not used to seeing
it like this.
And so my brain doesn't calculate this.
Take someone who's never played World of Warcraft and ask them how they feel about it.
They might give you a different answer.
I have no idea.
Whatever.
I mean, I don't know why I give a shit about that.
OK.
I think there's a restart on the GTA RP server.
So I'm going to wait for them to do their restart,
and then I'm logging in.
Reddit comments.
forever blizzcon 2026 summery
she's as fuck
so like
playable classes both horde alliance got a sky born shit okay
bar also barbershop and no world buff have been reported
no world buff was a streamer saying he thinks he heard that it wasn't exactly
clear or confirmed. I hope there's no world buffs or at least I don't want them
in raid. My only reason I like world buffs in the game is not really a
justifiable reason to even add world buffs. I like killing people with world
buffs. Like I like removing and griefing people with world buffs. That's it. But
But that's not a valid reason to add them to the game.
I hate you.
Yeah, but again, the only, that was like my only reason to go out in World PvP though,
is just gank people that had World Buffs.
I would sit in Darkshire, or Duskwood, yeah, Darkshire, between there and STV, and a lot
of Alliance players were running through STV to get their ZG buff, right?
And I would kill them.
And it was fun not for them, and I didn't care if I died whatever I just run back
But now I don't know any reason to do world PvP at all
There's none
Back in 2004 classic the reasoning was you would essentially defend your gold farming locations
Even in TBC. I remember I'd fight a lot of people up in those
areas in Negrand because they were killing the primals. Camp buffs, I guess. I mean,
you'll find World PvP just leveling, right? That's killing people because you want the
quest mobs and you want them to stop, right? That's going to be in questing, but we're
talking end game. And yeah, I guess gold farming and you want to kind of dominate this gold
farming area. But the economy gets ruined by bots, truthfully. That's just kind of how
it is. I never, I did farm gold in 2019. I was farming the water elementals in Eastern
Plaguelands. There was no one there ever. And it was one of the mega servers. There's
There's just no one there, ever.
So now the World Buffs are gone, uh, yeah, ooh, you bought gold, yeah, but I also played
the game for 20 years, so yes, I did buy gold, and I got exposed pretty hard that one time.
But no, I've played the game without buying gold before.
Yeah, I just don't know how it's gonna play out.
I don't know where the World PvP is gonna be.
I don't know.
something like Silithus event. Yeah, maybe they'll have some PvP events, but what are
the reasonings to go do it? Again, this is a pretty shit reason, but reality is it was
a reason. It was griefing people with world buffs. It really kind of did grief people.
When they died, there was, it was more than just having to run back. Uh, for fun, it has
to be more than that. I'm gonna say it has to be more than that because if it was for fun people
wouldn't just be afk'ing every fucking worst on Gulch for honor. Yeah it may be they buff the honor
that you gain in world pvp as opposed to just spamming bgs and then looking at which team has
more healers okay this team wins oh that team's a pre-made okay let's let them win really fast
So we get out quicker because that's optimal see that's the problem
There's a reality of how the game is actually going to be played in things like that
And that's how it is played out
That's what does happen not what people say. That's what happens sucks sucks ass
So I'm curious to see like what are these motivations for the world PvP I
Would I wouldn't mind if world PvP gave a fuck ton of honor and once you kill someone
one they're worth less and it's somehow somewhat competitive with farming battlegrounds.
How do you optimize that and how do you prevent it from being abused because then I can see people
just world like graveyard camping and people fucking selling oh you can kill my 50 000 alts
that I've bought it and you can kill all 50 000 of them back to back and have full honor and be done
You know ban abusers if that would be ideal
I'm not sure but again you see where I'm kind of like what we're missing something here and maybe we'll see it
Maybe they have a fix. We just haven't seen it. I don't know
Who cares if it's more fun shit will be abused anyway. Yeah is people that you know
People optimize the fun out of the game
What's that one quote?
If you let the players or something some dev said it's very true
They do optimize fun out of the game
And then if you don't join that group of people optimizing you fall behind and feel bad
So you're like, well, just don't do that yourself, but that's not how it works
An area where you drop your inventory that
that
Hope you get killed you drop some form of inventory. That's I
I don't think WoW has ever had any form of PvP where inventory drops to any extent in the world, but that'd be sick
Again, how would it get abused? I don't know. It could be cool a wilderness like RuneScape
I don't know motherfuckers would hate going there
Ascension did that they did but and I played Ascension
The difference is Ascension gave you so much fucking gear dopamine
that like if you lose gear you do not care you get that shit back when you
kill one mob I remember I played I'll also love there's also a reddit post
that called this out people are praising all the private servers and then
you look at the actual private servers and they're like charging money for oh
aoe loot extra bag space fucking a faster mount all these different things
This man and people sky elves losing their mind, but private surfers did it right
Not always. Let's let's relax here
People just are not realistic at all. I don't know where their fucking mindset is that maybe they're just trying to get more favorites on Twitter
Only four regions I thought there was more
Nine dungeons, okay
Two new raids, interesting, more than 600 profession recipes, man, that is something
that hasn't been talked about.
I wonder what kind of like, what are they going to do with consumables?
Like faps, have they talked about it?
Do I even want free action potion in the game anymore?
I don't think I do.
Now I'll take, maybe, oh, maybe I'd take Phaps, but I would want them, do I want them reduced?
Man, I don't know.
Maybe I do like Phaps, but they're just, I want there to be more competitive options.
In almost 99% of scenarios, unless you're a rogue, because you can't trinket stuns,
You just use free action potions.
99% of all scenarios.
It was pretty fucking OP.
Lips, maybe, again, as a rogue, especially
to break the stuns, I don't really
think there was fucking much else.
Was there?
I think Petri will be changed.
Good, right?
How is Petri going to be like, what's
their approach to Petri in hardcore?
I hope they kind of remove it.
I hope it's not even a debated thing.
But, again, I bet some hardcore players will disagree.
I remember when hardcore first became a thing, people were annoyed with Petri, and the people
that were actually playing hardcore loved Petri.
And like, you don't play it, you don't know how needed this is.
And then people started getting better at hardcore, and more people started playing, and now it's
like you really, like the whole thing changed.
So really, all those hardcore players early on just sucked at the game.
They were just bad, and they just didn't want to admit it or something.
And yeah, it's like it is a safety net, but that's kind of the point of hardcore as you
can die, and it's risky, and Petrie removed that.
Of course you want Petrie.
Of course!
But whatever.
So yeah, I don't know what they're going to do with the potions, and we don't know what
they're going to do with engineering.
uh... i hope they make it to where engineering isn't just some required
profession that every single person
has to have because it's the best obviously it won't be
and i'm curious to see how they buff the others
and i heard that the professions are similar to rathalich king
uh... where you gain an act like in rath when you get herbalism you have that
heal over time spell
um... and i think other
What is it? Wrath-mine-it's-wrath-stuff. Or is it cataclysm? Maybe? I don't know.
Not confirmed? Okay. That might have been a rumor that was passed around.
Mining gives percent max HP.
Yeah.
Kinda crazy.
Hopefully it's all competitive, right?
Probably still gonna be engineering. I just don't see how you make anything better than engineering.
But we'll see.
will still use for pvp and i'm obviously a pvp freak so
professions give buffs in the camps that's so minimal
uh... especially since it doesn't stack with like say arcane and like from a
mage
uh... new and classic dungeons of wow forever
okay
hall of thanes
it's competitive with rfc so alliance gets their new dungeon
again probably playing alliance so
ruins of Lordaeron
is that another alliance raid? okay
excavation site, try to find a key black of undestocked
city of Dalaran, I think it's everyone
horde is under, oh this is under city? okay
so wait a second
horde's gonna get
horde has more dungeons
early on
what the french toast
they get to rfcs
that's not fair
uh... it's a lot of done the drowned city
prodol stronghold level forty to fifty five what the flying fuck is this
by jesus christ what the hell
it's forty to fifty five this is wrong okay
there's another be out i would take it
to be like another b rd
i'm okay with uh... you know let's
new one
a waste
black mall a lot of cool stuff i wish i could talk more well but i gotta get on
gta fucking rp gamers
uh...
time to log in
casino shit to do
since
uh... when the game releases the beta i'll probably go live again tomorrow and
just sort of talk about stuff like i did today
but when the beta goes live i am putting no pixel on pause a lot of people have
been asking yet now this is a
somewhat of a temporary thing
uh... and then once the beta dies down if it dies down which you know it's like
you get max level and I don't have a lot of interest in making alts on a beta, then I'll
probably get back on GTA RP, but I'm going to kind of leave that open, we'll see what's
going on. That's where I'm at, if you're curious about where I'm, or what I'm going to be doing.
Which one, camera off? It's not going to die down, it may not, I mean it's a beta, it's
locked to level 30 like the classic wow 2019 beta died down it did oh it's level
20 and then 30 for two weeks interesting fuck in that case it may not die
down because I'll probably have to optimize there's probably gonna be
dueling tournaments that I want to participate in so I have to optimize my
gear get level 20 sets and then when level 30 comes out I don't fuck all right
god damn it what a loser I am I am but I'll probably still find time to log in
because I get to actually play this with Vicky.
She's not going to play the beta so I'll probably be a fucking ping pongy motherfucker.
We'll see.
I don't know.
I don't know what's going to happen.
I'm going to play it by ear.
Vicky was telling me to do both.
I'm like, okay we'll try.
We'll try.
Oh
Okay
Oh fuck oh my god, I forgot how punchable my face is you gross yuck disgusting
God I'm such a snobby bitch
Oh, and I got such a fuckface walk too. Oh god, I hate myself
No script RP today. Not really. No, not nearly as much as yesterday. But the only scripted
thing is I'm going to meet up with... I'm waiting for them to basically pick me up,
my dad and Viki. And that's from there. We'll see. But not in script. Yesterday was a full
on script. Today is not as much. But I am waiting for them to come get me and see what
they said. Oh yeah, because they have to log in and give us keys. I think I should go to
the casino. Let's just go there. I think I just go to the casino. Myself. Alright, let's
fucking just run out on your own yep I'm on my fucking own fuck stairs
thank god
Call my dad. I actually need to save his number. Hang on, I have it. Oh God, don't talk to
me.
Howdy.
Uh, yep, good morning.
Hi, Dancer.
Don't talk to me.
Alright, let's go around this corner.
Let me get my dad's phone number. Hold on, he sent it to me, because I am supposed to
to have it already. Let me find it. Minus one? Yep, you're right. Definitely. It's my fucking
dad. I was actually supposed to call him when I logged in, but I never did, so I'm supposed
to have this thing on.
Hello?
All right.
All right, contact.
Let's do, how do I add a, plus add new contact?
Dad.
Create.
They're already in a call.
Great.
Oh my god you could
There's two
Alright
I'm gonna go back to the other side
I'm gonna go back to the other side
I'm gonna go back to the other side
I'm gonna go back to the other side
All right, but I say talk there. I said I'm gonna walk there. Oh
Okay f1 emotes, I don't know quick emotes. Where's my where's my smoke?
Vaping
Oh, my dad's calling me.
Fuck.
Hey dad, good morning.
How was your first night living in poverty, my son?
Shit, smells like ass.
People were loud next to me.
I got no sleep.
It sucked.
It sucked.
Okay, well, let's see how you do today and we'll reassess afterwards because guess what boy you put on the big pants today
Where does that mean?
Well, you're gonna be doing some if you win you're gonna be
Facing the entire venture of the casino
What putting you in the front front-loading Senate boy
I feel like what better way than to toss you in the ocean full of sharks and see how you swim
The whole casino the everything dad everything
Oh, that's the shirt. That's the shirt son. We're not opening just yet. I've signed up a couple interviews
There's a baby social day. I'll say some bitches. They could be on the beach for you
Okay, okay, what would you rate them? Are they six or are they seven?
like out of ten six or seven why would you want them to be 10s out of 10s
why no cuz the hot the hot crazy matrix have you ever been on have you seen the
video oh I see okay well you just said on the like the hot scale you didn't say
on the hot and crazy scale there's a lot of scales there's a lot of like actual
math behind it but it's whatever it's fine I tend to not really deal with a lot
of scales and it's waits for other things beyond my capacity now did you call
Miss Molly to pick you up I don't have Molly's number
so you're telling me the entirety of the time we spent yesterday the
presence close proximity mind you to the lovely Miss Molly the one that drove
Move you to your...
As you say in your words,
POR
The State.
It's extremely poor.
Honestly, if there's a more poor word than POR, it's that.
It's more than POR.
It's like, POR plus, if you will.
Poor forever.
God, it's not fair.
Now,
You never thought
I'd talk to your mind.
Maybe.
Maybe just maybe.
I give Miss Molly's numbers
So they went our way I could call tattoo to pick me up and take me to the casino
Wait say that again. Sorry. I was looking at something. What?
You were looking at something. Yeah, there's this dog. Are you did you get
bitches on the beach mobile app?
No, I did not get the mobile bitches on the beach app. No
No, there was a dog
a dog well you're gonna be barking like a dog in one moment if you don't lock in
twin I'm here I'm here I'm here I'm ready I'm ready I'm ready dad okay so you
didn't have any sort of England or brain power spark Jimmy neutron style that
maybe ascertain that getting Miss Molly's number would be a mighty fine
idea considering she's the one that drives your father around and surely
You should be driving you around as well.
Well, I figured, I figured if you wanted me to have her number, you would have given it to me, dad.
Oh, I would have given it to you.
Just like how, with all the casino stuff, you're thinking, I'm just gonna do it all for ya,
and then it's just gonna fall on your lap, and you just get to reap the rewards.
Well, son, things are going different this time around, okay?
Okay.
I mean, it can't be that hard.
I can't, it can't be.
Well, I hope you have the attention for it, because I think we're going to have quite
a few interviews today.
Okay.
Now hold an eye, I'll give Ms. Molly on the phone and see where she is, okay?
Okay, I'm waiting.
It smells bad, Dad.
Please hurry.
Okay, maybe hang by the pool or go in the chlorine, so the scent of the chlorine...
There's shit everywhere.
There's shit.
These are not people living here.
They are freaks.
Okay, okay, okay.
Hey, if it's an emergency, if you can't handle the stench for another five minutes, there's a Google app, you can request a ride and take yourself to the casino.
That's a diamond icon on the map, okay? It's got its nice own special little logo sign on the map, isn't that nice?
A nice little beacon for you.
I'd rather walk there than talk to one of these fucking wages.
I'll see if Ms. Molly is awake as well, she was sleeping on the 6th floor, I was giving
us some time to rest, I have to deal with you.
Okay, alright, well I'm, I'm, oh, okay, it might take a bit, but I will do it.
All right, well this is gonna take a I will do it locked in don't fucking talk to me is that a player no way it is
All right
So what is the RP kicking there's an insult behind that
I do need to grab a drink I bet they're expecting me to be an NPC they don't know
it's a real player nobody knows oh that is a dead person Jesus Christ psychotic
really fucking I jaywalk criminal my first lawbreak is there an auto walk I
don't have a num lock can I bind that actually settings keyboard let's do
key bindings, movement, crouching, now there's none.
Can I try your pose?
I could go get a weight and just put it on my fucking arrow key, true.
Done that before
Hey, what's up, dad?
Hello?
Hey, I'm getting a friend to pick me up to then swing by and pick you up. How does that sound?
I'm walking there. I'm almost there.
Well, you're almost there.
Well, I'm not almost there, but I'm walking. I'm doing it dad. I can do I I can do things.
Why don't you why not? I'm so proud of you son. Look at you. Thanks. Thanks
But you're also being a bit of an embarrassment. You think you want to walk around the city?
Imagine if somebody sees you. Dude, everyone's looking at me. Everyone's looking at me. They know.
I tell you, they know. They see my social posts. They know it's popular. Look them in the eyes. Do not
look down, boy. Look them in the eyes. Call, call. Hey, be assertive and keep all moving forward
like you have business to attend to. In fact, why don't you go back to some business terms?
This is chunks of all the folks and they're like, oh man, he's doing with millions of dollars. Come on
There's billions billions. They know that dad they know they've seen my social posts
Thousands of favorites and they look at me and it's like that's him talk about it right now
You know, I am well, they're gone. They're gone. They left, but it's like
Just saying it's like it's a fucking crew
Yeah, let me let me I'm crossing the streets give me a second hang on
Wait, before you cross the street, stand in the middle of the street and demand the attention of the cars pulling up.
They will stop for you, you understand me boy?
Okay, okay?
Uh, there's no cars, give me a second, I'm looking for one. I'm in the middle of the street looking for a car.
I'm gonna go in the middle of the crosswalk.
Surely there'll be a car, look, poor.
Stop!
Cease your existence!
Alright, see me in the location, see me in the location, okay?
Okay, alright, I'm doing it, okay.
How do I turn my fuck like why is my mouse like this? I can't turn while I'm on the phone. Oh my god
Okay, I'm not anywhere close by the way it was like this location
You'll see me surely right
brought your mouse home from blizzcon you want me to bring it over
actually I ordered like two more
as fan because I fucked that up and left it I mean whatever I see you yeah
I live in Africa bro I don't know you'll bring this shit over I did order more
like they're gonna be here soon hopefully before the beta but I appreciate
you grab it because yeah that is my mouse
I'll give it to you next time alright I appreciate that thanks man
Yeah, I fuckin' left it and just said someone's gonna get a free mouse, I guess.
Right now I'm using, uh, it's an old Razer Naga that I found under, like, a shelf.
And I'm using a phone charging cable, and it's probably the thickest cable I have.
So it's miserable.
But I'm not really, I'm just playing GTA role-play, so it doesn't really matter.
Hey, I'm walking here!
Do you think anyone heard that?
Hey!
I sourced a new color of yarn!
HAH!
HAH!
HAH!
HAH!
HAH!
HAH!
HAH!
HAH!
HAH!
HAH!
HAH!
Okay getting there you think they'll drive by me
So are you leaked only things gasps
No way
You gross yuck disgusting
Okay, that's common
I want you to give him a hard time too. Hello? Hey, what's going on? I'm at your location. You see it. Where in the hell are you?
Uh, I kept walking. I kept walking. I'll send it to you. I'm right down the road. I just kept walking straight. Stop moving.
Okay, okay. Right down the road. Okay, we're going down the road. Okay, we're in an orange car. Orange car. I see you. I see you.
You see us. Yeah, you see me? Look at my shirt. You see my shirt? Oh, there you are. Yep. Okay, I love you.
Oh shit it's Lex Luthor I see you.
Hey what's up?
I believe Lex Luthor is bald, Mr. Lang.
Oh not the Zack Snyder version.
Good morning dad, who's this?
How you doing?
Oh that one.
We don't talk about that one.
This is, go ahead and introduce yourself son.
And we had a hell of a day.
Who's introducing themselves, your son?
Huh?
Am I?
you will. Yeah, nice to meet you. My name is Kevin. I've had a pretty rough morning.
Everyone smells bad. People are poor and I can tell that they're struggling and it's
pissing me off. So pretty stuff, a rough start so far. Okay, that's all right. Now, Kevin,
do you think this driver here is poor? You know, the windshield's a little fucked up
in the back, but you know, there's a pretty nice car. So no, it smells nice. Your best
I've had all day to be honest
Fantastic where my head is or to the casino. Oh great
So this is your kid
Yeah, my name is Kevin nice to meet you
And what was his name?
Did you remember or did you already forget?
Bimbo names on port and boy
They call him Bimbo?
A-Ball? I heard Bimbo.
That's cool. Nice to meet you. A-Ball?
8. 8. 8-Ball.
The number 8. 8-Ball.
It's 7-Ball would have been funnier.
Or 6.
Why?
Really?
How does he?
26.
He's 26 going on 27.
I don't understand, I don't understand what's funny.
Oh, you'll find that.
Oh, Mr. Lang, we're going to be in touch, okay?
I need to talk to him real quick about some things.
Oh, and get paid on it. This is just a free ride.
Oh, so you are a WG.
Yeah, come on out.
I need cash for this. Please, Mr. Cement? Oh. Nine pa- okay. Alright. Hey, I killed somebody
for your father, took him apart limb by limb and put him in a cement truck.
You look like Ronald McDonald, but less money. And you look like Lex Luthor from Zack Snyder's
film. But I have hair. Well, even if Jack's not a film, he does have hair. Well, he does.
Well, he doesn't get it, at least. Oh, he doesn't get it, I believe, and then he loses it later.
Well, get out of here, nerd, loser, poor. Your father literally said you're a nerd.
That's not true. Bitch is on the beach. Big fan. I do that stuff.
Well, you an artist? You a rat? No, I'm banging bitches on the beach and drinking margaritas
on the rocks. Actually, actually, Mr. A-Ball, he does rap. In fact, I think he would love
to make a rap about the casino being opening. That would be probably a great idea, wouldn't
it, son? Yeah.
Can he freestyle? He can totally freestyle. He'll be fine. He's got his stone shoe, boy.
Yeah. I mean, you know, my name is Kevin and I like to, you know, bet.
Hold on. Hold on. I was here with you back, brother.
Okay, my name is Kevin and I like to bet in some big money.
Uh, come here, honey.
Let me show you what I got, and I'm gonna, uh, sing this bop.
Bitch.
Got this itch on my nuts.
Why don't this- why don't you scratch it?
Itch?
That's it. That's all I got. I said, yeah, that's it.
Wow. That was beautiful.
Yeah, that was sick, right?
What is this casino? So, hold on.
Who runs a casino?
You're looking at the man right here.
My very son.
Yeah, it can't be that hard.
It can't be that hard.
It really can't be.
It can't be that hard.
It's not, I've never had a job,
but really, I look at what everyone else is doing.
Clearly, poor people can't even shower, so...
Mr. Samant, I get $9 in poker chips
and give you a free ride.
He's never done any of his life and you give him an entire casino
Nepotism motherfucker look it up
Mr. Hey Paul there will be some more stuff for you that'll be more suitable to your needs and desires
Yeah, I can't I'm looking forward to it. Can't wait to get paid five dollars for the fucking free ride
He won't even be able to gamble
Now, where is Miss Molly?
I thought Molly was picking me up.
She was, but she was sleeping in a bit.
So, I mean, we could see the limo was pulled in.
So, uh, oh, why don't I give you the number for her?
And you can call her to see where she is.
How does that sound?
That sounds good.
I like that.
Molly seems nice.
Oh, yeah, hold on.
I just shared a contact.
Oh, wait, is that easy?
Okay, ask instant Molly. All caps. Nice, good one.
I'm calling her.
Hello, this is Molly.
Hey Molly, it's Kevin. Good morning.
My uh, my, yeah, my dad wanted me to call you to task where you're at, right, because...
Why do you have my phone number?
Well, he gave it to me because I'm gonna be running the casino. It's not a big deal. It's whatever. It's not gonna be that hard, either.
She told me to delete her number.
And then she hung up.
Oh, boy. This is gonna be a long endeavor.
Oh, don't you worry, sweetheart, you're just fine.
We had a different person pull up and pick up my son and I see the limos out front.
So you want to meet us out to the front?
Or where are you?
lovely now miss Molly did you hang up on my son and you think that was a good
idea to do and that's exactly what I want to hear miss Molly good we'll see
you up front
is everything okay I hope you're ready for the transition son I'm about to
to listen to her responsibilities to oversee your ventures.
To make sure that you are relatively stay within the line.
Dad, she hates me.
If you have any questions, you can always call me.
Well, that's what building a relationship is for.
Most people despise one another.
Hell, I still despise you.
What?
But did you hear what I said at the end of the day?
Yeah, you said I love you.
You said it back.
I didn't hear that.
I remember that.
Exactly. It doesn't happen instantaneously. I know you're used to instant gratification.
I mean, it's usually ideal. It's optimal, really.
This is true, but it's often times not the reality.
Tell me, Smally. Good morning, sir.
Why don't we walk inside real quick? You want me inside? You want me to wait out here?
Son, I said we as we yeah, but you were talking to her so it almost okay. Well, we can also mean you're right dad
I love you
All right, we're gonna go to the sixth floor
Oh
This Molly is six for good or did you have a rough night?
There it was it was amazing. I'm so grateful you let me stay in there
Yeah, probably well fucking nice expect some cleanliness, right?
It's clean. I love to I love to clean
spotless even
Not a dust to be seen sir
Perfect. All on descent after we talk up here. Son, would you mind giving a nice little jingle
on the way down just to get a feel for the type of elevator music you were kind of thinking
in your head? Oh, you want me to do that right now? I said all on descent, son. Are we descending
after we're met up here? Sorry, you're right dad. Do you know what descending means? Yeah,
It's like the same as vertical, but like the bottom half of vertical.
That is certainly one way to put it.
Oh, I think those rats may have given me something.
Yeah, this is a-
I'm gonna caught something too.
Yeah?
You should have seen the apartments. Holy shit.
I swear the people were actually like grosser than the rest.
Well, you literally holy shit, right?
Yeah, like literally.
Alright, to the meeting room.
Take your time, Molly. It's great.
Hello, kid and teaser.
What he can he can come in see even she's confused
Let me stand on that
We're gonna be clearing up right now. Okay. Let me stay next to you
Son you need to start to realize some more questions you ask some more of a beta bitch you
Become perceived by others
Just wherever you decide to be your choice matters guys be right next to you guys not a big deal
You thought that was the best place to position yourself. Yeah, like I'm like your right-hand man same on the right chose this side
I was thinking about you
Well, that's very sweet son now
Now, listen Miss Molly, I know you used to deal with me
in a lot of my adventures together.
But this here operation with the casino
is gonna be my sons.
I mean I'll help where I'm needed,
but for the most part I want him to take the reins.
Which means, as begrudgingly as you may feel,
this is your job.
I want you to make sure this boy doesn't step out of line, and I want you to take some notes and give me reports on his ideas, what he's doing, especially once the casino opens.
Sorry, you can't be serious. You mean like hire him a nanny, right?
It may feel like a nanny for now, but that's why I'm entrusting you to make it beyond just
a nanny in position.
Because I believe you can help me transform my boy into something more.
If you need to smoke, go ahead.
Oh, she's so excited you can't handle it.
Yep, that's right
That's that's the body language you picked up from that she's staring at a wall that is black
Yeah
Award of she's so excited. She's crying like joy. I don't blame her. Look at me
Yeah, I don't I don't even I have never seen or heard Miss Molly cry ever
This isn't a job. This is an opportunity. This is the first she should be lucky to get to be a part of this
This cannot be that hard
You go
So
Yet at this is going to be very hard. I
Mean like you never had a job in your life
Well, again, this isn't a job. This is an opportunity. Let's just be honest
Yes, so
You're gonna be from being my right hand
compatriot you're gonna be
My boy's right hand
Patriots, so if he has things that needs to be done
Oh shit, I asked you to do some things and you will have to listen, but
miss Molly if there's any sort of a
Command that he may bark at you that you feel is not appropriate
You can be feel free to give any sort of pushback in a moment. I don't know what that was
You understand yes
Who is the post set authority over who in this situation?
I have the authority.
Yes, he's gonna have the authority.
But if you call him or dad to me, him to you, it's whatever.
Yeah, yeah, he'll come in, whatever, but it's fine.
This cannot be that hard.
But if there's any sort of calls you can call me and I can give approval on something if need be
You do have that
Disciplinary tool
Yes, the dog needs to be trained
Now, we've got some people that are going to be calling up to see if they could meet
for a potential interview to offer to you, my son, the type of services that they might
be able to provide.
Oh, interviews the way.
And then you can make the decision.
Potential prospects for working here at the casino.
You can't just, you know, are you planning to run the show floor yourself?
of the alcohol, be the security guard and all the sorts.
Okay. So it's an interview for all of those different jobs. All right. And then we got
the advertisement we got to make too, right?
Yes. So the director was going to call me probably in the next hour.
Oh, shit. Okay. I mean, this can't again, I'm going to keep saying this can't be that
hard. Well, I guess we'll start off with one and see how it goes. How does that sound?
Easy. Yeah, I'll just say yes.
Ms. Marni, did you get any text messages from the Pride Day? Because there were some people
that I met that I gave your number and I don't know if they sent you a message or not.
I did, sir. I got a message from a pit boss or someone looking for the pit boss position.
Oh, was that, uh, did they say the name?
Leave it started with a G.
They did not.
Okay.
Well, you want to give them a call to see if they're around?
Cause if that's the person I think it is, they're also really good at, uh,
managerial things in terms of, uh, money management, uh, logistical.
necessities
what do you mean by logistical necessities
well that's what you're gonna find out boy when we interview her
how much money do i have
when was the last check you sent me dad
hello this is molly
well i stopped sending you checks
you should probably have a less than a thousand dollars to your name
Do I see this bank?
Government maybe?
Come on, let's walk.
All right, Goober, garage, calendar, lemon, property, what the fuck's my money?
It's either now or never. You do not keep Mr. Seaway.
Get to download it.
Oh, Miss Molly.
We'll see you in two minutes.
Two minutes, make it two. All right.
I miss more future calls especially in regards to the casino instead of mentioning me. Let's try mentioning on mr. Whipple
That's me. Would you like a nickname?
Oh, well, let me say mr. Whipple and here you say it
Come on say it
Mr. Whipple Lou say his name say it
Mr.. Mr.. Mr.. Mr.. Whipple, Whipple!
Excellent
Goddamn right
Are you ready?
Have you followed up a potential musical jingle as we descend this elevator here? Oh, I yeah, I've got it
It's got in my head. It's playing right now actually
Okay, are we ready are we ready
I hear we gave it go
No, no, no, no, no, no, no.
No, no, no, no, no, no.
That was it.
And bang.
Welcome to the first floor, Mr. Whippeloo.
And it says that in one of those voices.
She's gone.
Did you just prank Miss Molly?
No, I didn't do that.
I swear.
I just walked off.
I'm not kidding.
I didn't do it.
Just kind of happened.
I will shoot your dog. She's on the top floor
Sir, welcome back this Molly
I didn't press the button. I didn't do that. No, you just wanted to hear the song
I bet no, I didn't press it. I did not press it. She's lying. He pressed. No, she's trying
She's trying to frame me and he's he's stuck me. No, she's bullshit. Yeah, she's bullshit. I'm serious
Just like last night. He closed the door behind me and he walked in. Listen, listen, I
I
Care about your boy, but I don't want you lying to me
Not that I never lie. I'm not lying. I'm not
No, I don't
Okay, the bottings true which we still have to talk about the bottings lower your voice lower your voice
Bottings for me boy. Oh, sorry. You're right dad. You don't know your voice the body's true, but I did not press the elevator button
No, no, I was impressed look at you son
Demanding the man of my stature took lower my voice. That is the type of comedy
We need for this to see the board. That was a test. That's right. That's right
Wait, this ain't the
Unfortunate that was Molly the presses for by the way, it wasn't me Molly did this I was singing the song
We gave a two-minute timeline and now we're gonna be the ones late
Damn it, Walter got off my cable. He just unplugged my mouse. Oh
No, we're back, okay
All right, you want to take this into that office for the interview that won't office near the security office
Yeah, you know that's sick chair
Did you want to run over there and sit in there and we leave her there and have the
interview in this? Yes! Who is it? Oh she sees you right now she better run.
Okay you know what it is? Yeah. Actually where is it, fuck. I think it's
Oh, sorry.
I think it's downstairs.
It's like here.
Then over here.
And then it's over here.
Okay, and then it's up here.
And then it's...
And here...
And then I...
Fuck that. Okay.
And then it's...
Uh... where is it from here? Is it here on the right? Or is it... fuck.
Uh... shit.
Fuck!
Fuck I love you!
Is it locked? Okay, we're good.
Oh!
I know there's like a crazy view. Oh baby in here here and lock that and it's farther down
Oh, here we go. Here we go. Here we go
All right, and it bang all right now, how do I get in this chair?
Ah shit f1 player interact no
emotes placed emotes it's got to be a chair I can sit in okay interesting do
this one I don't think it can do this one
yikes
ha z on the table
the z on the table mean I get
sit on the edge of the table okay
E-Motes
Z lowers the emote. Oh, okay. All right. Well, let's type in sit
And also sit on the desk here, okay, we'll try this gay sit
Rotate height no Z's prep doing nothing
Oh, I mean
I'm not ready wait
the
the
of
the
only looks good though some of
the
All right, we just gotta go a bit slow to go down.
That looks like a fucking idiot.
Okay, all right, it's good enough, I guess.
All right.
Oh shit, how do I go down? How do I...
Oh, there we go, okay.
Oh
You can come on in because this is gonna be important
They're fixed to can't talk back down can't talk
Have to cancel up shit. Well for free to introduce yourself to the boss
Nice to meet you. Yeah, you introduce hello. Oh
First yeah, you go first you go first
Before before we continue modify give a quick word to my son
Of course, of course, sir.
Hey, Dad, what's up?
I tried to sit, but the thing didn't work.
You can't have got this, or do I have to be like a whisper and foul from behind?
I think I've got this.
How old are you, four?
You got it.
I believe in you, son, okay?
It's dependent.
What are they doing?
I guess I'll find out.
That's what you inquire about, all right?
Right.
Okay.
You know what kind of questions you might have to ask to get that type of answer?
Yeah, yeah, yeah, no, I've got this.
It's easy.
I got this.
Of course you do, boy, because you're my son.
You're right. All right. You may approach
My name is Gigi. Okay. Hello Gigi. So what what are you gonna do here? What do you want to do with the casino? I
Mean am I am I supposed to just tell you a position or do you have openings? I'm not sure
I mean you want there. What the fuck do you want to do?
Okay, well, in the past, I ran a 60 plus person organization across multiple time zones, and
we did both good and nefarious things.
And I was the second in command in that operation.
And I was in charge of logistics, finances, doing some of the work myself, everything.
Wow.
So really, it could be a place wherever, but probably, you know, in the organization side.
Okay.
reason I'm gonna have to pass but I appreciate you coming in you need a
janitor no we actually have one shit but I appreciate you coming in it was
awesome awesome to meet you but I appreciate it okay you need an enforcer
we do but again for that reason I'm gonna have to pass because I'm over
Qualified is that why that has to that you know what and for that reason I'm gonna have to pass
All right, I think I'm gonna have to
Another job then yeah, that's probably you gotta go get a job. See we don't do jobs here. We do opportunities. Oh
Oh, and that's why there might be a job opening for you, but just not today.
For that reason, I'm going to have to pass.
Thank you.
Okay.
All right, maybe there'll be an opportunity in the future.
Yeah, in the future.
Thank you for coming in.
All right.
You're you're welcome. Yeah, you're welcome too. So like sorry quick. You didn't have like any ideas that might have pulled the interest of the boss here, Mr Whipple or other things you might be able to provide.
Well, to be honest, sir, you told me you needed a pit boss and to send her a message about it and I did and then she said don't come.
And then she said, don't come fucking with that job, which means she is the pit boss.
It's the person who organizes the floor.
You know, you keep people running the tables and shit.
You enforce the rules, you make sure dress code is taken care of, all that kind of stuff.
Fucking dress code?
What?
Yeah.
You know, any sort of rules that you have in the place.
For the people in the place, make sure people aren't cheating, that kind of stuff.
I see.
Okay.
How would you enforce that?
Um, well first yes nicely you give a little warning and you tell them if they don't stop
You're gonna have to tax them on their account and if they don't do that then you beat the fuck out of them. Oh
Wow, okay, how would you plan to beat the fuck out of them?
I'll preferably with a golf club. That's what I used to do back in the day
Now what do they do in the current day? What's what's the what's technology do nowadays?
Well, I have a knife and I can use my fists.
Wow, technology has come far, hasn't it?
Now...
Oh, yeah.
Okay, so when would you want to start?
And what's the kind of like cost of something like this?
Well, as soon as I could, because to be frank with you,
I've been farming and doing goober and I want to die.
I could start anytime.
The fuck is a goober?
Exactly. Don't even worry about it. It's horrible.
What do you do experience of my life? I
Drive around people you ride. I give them rides. What do you drive?
In ingots a shitty little ingot and I don't want to drive it anymore
And for that reason I'm gonna have to pass I do appreciate you coming in
I don't own it. It's right then it's rented. Yeah, I don't know. I don't know
I can't be having that kind of stains on my parking lot. I
Could get rid of the rent though. I could get rid of the rental
Okay, and what would you change it to?
Oh, I don't know. Premier Autos is a few nice things. I'm not sure if it's in stock, but they got some nice cars across the street.
Interesting. Dad, do we hire her?
Uh, G.G. was it?
Yeah, yeah, it's G.G.
Oh, give me a moment with my son as we deliver it.
Okay.
Okay, Miss Mar you come over here as well. Are you important in this matter?
I'll just just stand in that corner. I'll face face the corner. I stare at that red vase actually. Oh
See how there's a blue vase in a red vase
Okay, so blue vase would be like confirming the red vase would be a
Negatory like your round, you know like a red X. I see she seems desperate and it's pissing me off. I
See okay
She doesn't kind of tough sir. I may say so myself
And may I just say that I did not say coming from a job.
I just said she would be the under pit boss.
Well, yeah, of course, I was just going to be above above you in that regard.
That is exactly what I was doing, sir.
But she did mention to me that she does like logistical stuff.
I just don't know what that word means more the accounting realm or, you know, help and
manage, you know, employment.
know if you're like a budget wise handle a budget I don't know how much money
do we have I don't know God it's awful here yeah what do we I haven't seen
anything I don't know what we have okay well we can put a pin at that for now
until we get this account sorted we meant that it gives me a call they're
working on the logistics of that she's cleaning that face yes fucking gross
doing work I'm you're gonna have to have to she's doing the gross things so
you don't have to do what if what if Molly did the gross things you can't be
serious I mean Molly Molly could do this this is great this is good she seems
ready for it right am i crazy that hurt to be a lot of molly do the interview
may i use the shot color sir well permission granted place we're saying
that miss molly should do the interview now i got it here all you mean you
want to you've got it yeah i mean unless molly wants to back i mean molly do
I want to do it call to take so
You guys find out on yourselves. I'll let you fuck Molly. Just do it. Please. Can you just do it? Please don't shock me again
I'm not doing your job for you. Okay. I'll do it. I'll fucking do it. I'll fucking do it fine
You're gonna have to deal with this person to you know that right
What are you doing? Are you hurrying or not?
I fucking know it, am I hiring? Do we need her? What the fuck is a logistic? I don't know what that means, do you know?
That was my first fucking time in the casino.
Same! Same!
Fuck man, fuck.
What the fuck do we do? Do we fucking hire someone? Cause then we have this fucking person walking around, I don't fucking know them.
It's like I don't even know what they're supposed to be doing. Why the fuck would we hire someone? I don't even know what they're gonna do.
Shit, listen, she's like, I don't know why she cleans the faces and shit, right?
Just fucking janitor do we need a jab we got the janitor last time the fucking cleaning people I don't need another fucking janitor
No, those are for the fucking rats
Because well, okay, so we need a fucking so we're gonna pay this person a wage and they're gonna clean vases all day. Is that it?
You don't got a payer. Oh my god. You're right. We don't have to
What's the legalities of that? I
Don't think we care about that. Okay, you don't care about that
All right, all right, we're ready.
Mrs. Fucking, what's your name?
We're ready for you.
Oh yeah, yeah.
It's Gambino, last one, Gambino.
So Gambino?
Yep.
That's incredible.
You are hired.
Congratulations, how do you feel?
Amazing.
I feel exhilarated, I feel excited,
I feel like my leg is very broken,
but I don't feel it as much, so that's good.
Well, perfect.
Right. So what, what exactly were you planning on getting out of this, uh, opportunity?
Um, a great time and money.
Okay. Now how much money?
Oof. Um, well, I would love, you know, maybe in the, well, how much does this place make?
That's a great question.
We're not open yet.
a lot. Ooh, okay.
So how is working for three years? Okay. So dad, basically, uh,
I said she's hired. Um, we didn't sign anything yet. So I can sell on what
grounds or what grounds?
Well, I asked what she wants and she said a great time and I said, okay,
but how much money and she said, how much do we make?
And I said, we're not open yet. And then she went and then you came in.
Okay, well, continue.
Yeah, so we are not open yet, so we don't make any money yet.
So that's about where we're at. What are your thoughts there?
Okay, well, there are a few options. I do think when building, you know, to be a good part of the team, I should probably just assume I won't get anything for a little bit.
That's great. That's great.
Yes. However, you can go with two options.
What are these options you propose?
Well, you know, some sort of hourly rate could make sense.
Or very simply, we could just do a percent profit share.
Ooh!
Decide a percent for me.
Mm.
I'm just saying, you know, the way that it's not making money,
you know, you don't have to pay me.
That made me throw up.
You know, that's fine.
I'm just saying it's an option.
It's just a potential option.
It's a way to get free work in places in general.
What exactly will you be providing here?
Well, just kind of going around and forcing.
I don't know what you want to call that title,
but enforcing all the rules, getting people in.
I can do some promotion, and I can make sure
all the rules are followed.
Now, what are some rules that you would enforce,
would you say?
I think number one is a dress code.
I don't think people should be in an establishment like this
looking like shit.
I agree, actually.
Yes, I do agree.
Yeah, great idea.
Now, no masks.
No cheating for sure.
Ooh, absolutely no masks.
I'm telling you right now, if you allow masks,
they're gonna come in
and they're gonna start hitting these machines
with crowbars.
Yeah, I heard about the technologies insane nowadays
with these crowbars.
Oh yeah, oh yeah.
Well, there's that.
And how would you recognize if someone was, say, cheating?
That depends on what game they're playing.
Blackjack.
You have to go talk to all the dealers.
Well, you know, looking at other people's cards,
maybe looking across the room, sharing info
with someone else who's watching cards, that sort of thing.
How do you feel about the homeless?
Ugh, do not like them.
Do not like them.
Agreed, agreed.
Okay. All right. Well, here's what we'll do. I'll take your number. We're gonna put
somewhat of a pin in this because we're not quite open yet and we'll be in touch. And
I think that's the best thing we can do in our current situation.
Hey, sounds great to me.
All right. Well, I'll get your contact.
I do have a potential idea, Mr. Wibble.
Oh, yeah. What is it, dad?
Deliberate afterwards.
Oh, so it's an afterword.
Unless you want to hear it now.
I'll hear it now. I'll hear it now. Let's go.
So you know out front there's like a bit of a show for stand to, you know, taxi people's
cars into the lot.
Yes.
And we also have a reception inside.
Now I want to hear your thoughts because remember this is your project, right?
This is your opportunity.
I don't know if I'm doing it.
Look at me.
Look at me.
Look at me.
I have somebody there at both stations making sure no poor or homeless or any sort of stage
enters the premises of the casino or even gets to the reception. It's like a pre-check.
My worry is the cost.
Yeah, because that's an extra employee, right?
Well, see, that's beautiful. Look at you.
I'm a businessman. I watch TV.
I've got an idea. And let me know if you like this or not.
I'm inside here. I'm enforcing. Okay. Perhaps we keep the door locked and we post up a number.
We post my number at the front. We tell people if you're here and you'd like to be allowed in,
text this number. I go to the glass doors and I take a look at them. And we have two options.
Either they buy a VIP pass that allows us whenever we see them to just let them in or they just do
pay at the door fee. And the fee changes depending on how they're dressed.
That's a lot of time investment to get into the casino. I want people in here losing money
ASAP. And the other issue is, what if you're not around?
That's fair.
Then we got to get someone there 24-7 if that's the standard.
Fair enough.
But it still could be fucking great. I don't fucking know. Let's put a goddamn pin in this.
I'm taking someone to stand there. Give me your phone number. All right, fine. Okay
Listen, uh, Gigi, this is a trick question, but do you have any food on you? Oh
Um, I do I always keep a glissy on me
Well in that case you leave it on the table
All right
Let's let's call it your investment
I can have my last glass and you can have it.
Excellent.
Yes.
Well, it was nice meeting you, Gambino.
I guess we have to escort her out.
Oh, God.
Oh, that's what you have an assistant for.
Molly, can you please escort Miss Gambino out?
Yes, sir.
Thank you, Molly
Thank you very much nice being you will be in touch, baby. We'll see I don't know
So that was your first interview how do you feel? I mean it was easy, but dad
I don't know how any of this works yet. I haven't said the funds the money the
What do I have the machines? I haven't even seen the machines. Yes. Yes. I'll understand I understand
we're gonna get there. This is more so vetting people off the personality and what they could
provide if you think they're a good fit for the position we so here's the thing right this is an
interview for the interview if you think about it it's like we'll put a picture we'll call you back
it's like a callback like this is not I see they're trying to sell themselves to you for this
opportunity we're vetting out the worthless we're trying to get ahead of the curve so that when the
time actually shows up we don't waste our time with the non worth or the worthless trash right
Exactly when we're ready to when it's time to open we'll be prepared. That's what this is for. We're laying down
cement
You know of all business, you know what I'm saying boy. We love that to be prepared
Instead of opening with the pants down
Okay, well now I have a better clear idea of what's going on
I I thought I was supposed to give this girl a job instantly and I'm like what the hell is there to even do
So I didn't know what to do
Well, you know, that's kind of what I can be here for as well.
If there's any sort of concerns you have or questions you can call me or you can talk
to me.
Because you know, at the end of the day, I want you to be running these things, okay?
I can't babysit you all the time, right?
I mean, I mean, I just, I've got this, dad.
It's so easy.
Well, you are in luck because the director's going to be coming in here very soon.
He told me he'd be calling me in the next 20 or 30 minutes now.
For the advertisement.
Oh yes, yes, the advertisements.
I see.
Okay.
And building out short form content along for whatever you want.
Man, it's quite the hike to get to this office.
Molly's gonna fucking hate us quick people out all the time.
It's a good spot for it, right? You're damn right. Look at this. No one could see us. We could see them full floor
Once we open it's gonna be you could see Miss Molly
Transporting people to the office, you know, wait, I don't see her. She reduced we see her. Was she there?
Maybe she was I wasn't looking at the window. I was looking at you
Oh, yeah, I wanted to see I wanted to see my first time ever being like like, you know, they're the cop on the other side of the mirror
Exactly. Now, I did kind of like the idea of enforcing the
dress code as an extra way to make some revenue, you know,
charging people for rolling up in here, looking gross and
broken poor. True. It's like a poor dog, like a radar for the
poor. Dad, the apartment. You've got a good eye for that. I
think you might have to train the security to know what
poor looks like. You're right. Maybe we I could go out. I
could find three homeless as bad examples and then three people who are
dressed nice and then I'll mix them up and I'll say point to the three people
that are problematic and then that's a test. That's a great idea but now we
got to probably figure out hair or who you may want to be security. I mean it
just depends on what kind of horse you might want. I mean it just depends on what
kind of security we need you know I haven't seen the whole place function yet.
I haven't seen what kind of problems we're going to be enduring.
Well, you know, people might be counting calls.
There might be some troublemakers trying to maybe smash a slot machine.
There might be people running around trying to calls havoc, not respect rules.
Who would you, where would you recommend I go to find people that could do something like this?
Well, you're quite famous on the socials. You can make a social plug like looking for
a tough tough people to handle a tough job. Okay, tough people, tough job, no homeless.
And then I can do another broke can't be broke and I can do another ad and it'll be like
looking for homeless because the idea had before. And then I get tough people and I
get homeless and we just do a test we say all right that's the three homeless
and then they know and then it's like all right you know what's up you know what's up
you know what I'm saying or at least not homeless you know just like poor in general
maybe they fight to the death it'd be really funny
the homeless that that is intense
Well Molly what are your thoughts? Did you make an ad on the lemon list? No not yet.
Molly what are your thoughts? I want to do anything through the directors here.
The lady? I liked her. I thought she's tough. Well there's one tough person okay.
Okay. How many tufts do we need? Two. Two, sir. We need two tufts? No, I'm saying there's
two tuft people. Oh, thank you. Let's use some visual call textual phones going over
to the security room real quick okay? Okie dokie.
Yeah I keep thinking the security room is the office. I always get it mixed up.
Oh, yeah, it is. Well,
as you mount goodness gracious.
Oh, yeah, look at this.
Six console. Yes.
So there's a there's a lot, a lot of modulated stances here.
So we're gonna have to pay someone to just stare at this stuff
Well, I mean do you want to stand it fuck no, I don't think so
That's what the polls are for right they're looking for opportunity
They're looking for a reason to find some value and you could give them that
So it's not what I'm thinking
You could you know show your thoughts be probably want at least maybe two people here or at least a bare minimum one person to monitor
and maybe one or two for Marley and then they can talk to Miss Marley or perhaps Miss Gigi.
If those are your enforcers on the ground floor, they can radio the men if they see any people,
you know, any suspects. I was wondering where you were, Marley.
I wasn't sure if I should come in. Interesting. You're always welcome, Miss Marley.
Thank you sir. I'm just a little comfy with the authority right now.
Well, I'm gonna be trying to listen to whatever my son desires and wishes for.
Because you're gonna be his assistant.
You do assist me as well, but for the most part within the ground, the confines of this casino here,
I want you to be respecting my son's authority.
Hey Molly, do you have anything to drink?
No, I do not but I can get you a drink sir a drink. I'm I'm parched
Yes, a drink and some food would be great miss Molly for the both of us
And if you need some food to go ahead and get yourself stored
All right, I'll be back in the town. Do the do the drink machines work?
They do they do you work? Oh hold on. I mean do you buy you a soda? Yeah, please please please please
Wait they work. Oh my god
Dang, thank you Molly we get that
How do I take that from her
I'm just going to drink this whatever.
God bless you Miss Molly, God bless.
Thank you Molly.
Oh, yes.
You know me and Soda.
I love this stuff.
Thanks Molly.
Oh yeah.
I'll be right back with the food and the drinks.
Okay.
So when it comes to the director, you said they're going to give you a call?
Yes, I call them right now to see if they'll they'll wake but they said they
should be around of very very soon.
Did you have any potential ideas of what you might want to say?
For me, you want to leave that to the director. I was gonna leave it to the
director and see what they wanted to do. You know they've got the vision.
Perfect, perfect.
I think we're just gonna go with you Molly that's fine
Fuck of these dialogues
Still on the phone I think he is
Did they answer?
Did they answer?
I'll just send an email.
I see.
I mean, so if the director's busy, then in that case,
I could start doing the screening interviews.
Now that I kind of understand what I'm looking for,
I could probably do those.
Yes.
I'm gonna be honest with you,
I think we wait till we get our food,
cause I...
It's that bad, huh?
Yeah, it's pretty bad.
I
Need you all right after that soda, I'm feeling great. I don't even think I needed I just wanted it. I'll take some food though
Where's the where's the way to take a little group trip to the burger shop, or oh
I mean you don't want to shop at a convenience store for food. No, yeah, I would go to burger shop. Is that like a high-end restaurant?
Uhhhhhhhhhh..... You'll find out boy!
All right.
Let's just... options may not be the best at this point in time.
I mean uh food is food.
Uh Shirley, it can't be that bad.
Give me one second I need to respond to an email.
Call Molly.
Hello, this is Miss Molly.
Hey Molly, it's Kevin again. Don't hang up.
So I think we're all going to take a trip to Burgershot.
I don't know if you already left, but I was gonna stop you. I think just come back real quick, you know
I'm still at the casino
Where you at?
Met the front door. Were you at?
I'm at the front door too. No, I'm at the front door. Oh, you are at the front door. So am I okay? Okay. Bye
Nice.
You got it locked.
I'm excited for this restaurant. He's gonna be sick. And I'm starving.
Oh yeah, I'm too. Also, uh...
Actually, this might be a perfect opportunity.
I
Miss Molly we're gonna take a quick detour
Cuz this is gonna be the first time
My son benefits offer welfare
Right boy, you're gonna collect a check cuz you're unemployed with no job. No bitches and no money
So just far. Oh, Miss Molly. I think I up getting it all on map. Oh
Oh my god, I believe my GPS is still something for a drosser.
Alright, how about now? Did that change at all?
Look at this thing!
What the hell?
Hey, hey, hey, hey, look, see, see how the poles stop the flock as you're driving something nice.
You see, am I poor?
Yeah, I don't know, poor people disgust me.
That was brighter than my future.
You hear that? The car is brighter than his future. That's the caliber of presentation we're going for boy.
To be told, that's called self-awareness. I got respect for that.
True. Well maybe we should have interviewed them.
Maybe, you know, they got some thinking caps.
Wait, Miss Molly, we're heading...
Sir, I am.
We're going straight, we're going straight, just go straight.
Did that change for you or not?
It did not, sir, I am.
Okay, don't worry. We're gonna go be going straight sometimes what might happen is if you're putting something into the
The director's calling
Like clockwork boy. Oh, we got the director. Okay. Don't keep going straight. Oh
We're supposed to go straight
Don't worry, sir. I'll think director James
Marco say Marco is this the man in the flesh
Oh, why don't I put you on speaker real quick?
Director James, why don't you meet my lovely son, Kevin Whippenoo?
Nice, nice to meet you, Marco.
My name's Kevin and I heard you're gonna make me famous.
Take a left, Miss Molly.
Yes, Kevin.
I hear you're ready for your glow up, your close up and otherwise to be put on the front
page.
Right here.
That's the tone.
Oh, that's the tone.
Sorry, oh, mr. Marker. We would we are progressing towards a certain location real quick. You're gonna keep going straight. We are
Okay, and you said you was bringing a mr. Oh, she ha Jones without your ticket. I'm so sorry
You're gonna take a look back up over there
All right, perfect. Okay. Well, why don't you give me a call when your squad is gathered?
Uh, you can meet us at the pixel casino. How does that sound? We got to go do a little
quick tour to the bugger shot. And after we go over here to the bank, I don't want to
meet you at the casino. How does that sound? That should give you ample time to prep.
45 seconds, oh, what Kevin you said you said seven what what about six forty-five
Okay, that's worse
Okay, I think you said seven minutes no
Right. He said I heard six forty-five seven forty. I ruined it dad. I ruined it
He really did okay pulling over here. This is where we're going
Yikes. Well dressed, but in a school that no less.
Yep. That's a bro key.
She wants where you're going, freak!
So what is this place?
Oh well, son. This is a bank, okay?
This model you're free to come inside if you like or if you want to stay in the car that is tally up to you
Oh
So a bank this is it huh, this is this is how it works
Well, this is a Pacific standard public deposit bank now. This is where people will go to collect the paycheck
check. Oh, God. For everyone you hire, they'll collect their paycheck, though, you know,
the amount that you'll pay them, and you'll come over here to get your check. Interesting.
Is that Mr. Blunk? Oh, yes, sir. This is my son. This is my son, Kevin. Hi, nice to meet
you. I'm Kevin. Nice to meet you, Kevin. I'm Charles Dawson, the Commissioner of Police
Department. Nice to meet you. Oh, wow. That's cool. So you have a window where people can't
see you on the other side too? No, I don't actually. Oh, man, we
have one at the casino. It's we have like multiple. It's fine.
Casino the cursor casino. Yes, sir. Casino I'll be running it.
It's not a big deal. It's whatever it's not. It's like not a
big deal. Well, you the casino owner? Yes, sir, I will be running
the casino. That's me. When we open, gonna go do an advertisement
right now. Yeah, I was thinking about having like a PD, you
know off duty night there officers go down there and just you know have some
fun well what's up you know of course we can work something out casinos open
everybody lots of bitches lots of cops everything works some of the same fantastic
all right awesome well it was nice to meet you mr. Dawson nice to meet you as
well Dawson nice to meet you Mr. Whipple Whipple Lou mr. Whipple Lou alright
Pleasure is mine. Yes, he takes after
My wife's maiden day. She died when I was born. I'm really depressed about it, but it's whatever. It's not big deal
Just like me running the casino
Well, he's your son, Mr. Blum
Yeah, do you not see the resemblance boy?
Beautiful boy
He's got that he's got that
Oh, oh, doesn't he try to use your presence as you pulled up right? You knew he had authority
That's me, right. I'm a thwart. I'm a thwart commissioner. You saw him. You felt that presence, didn't you?
Yeah, yeah
It's the flip-flops I
Felt the beach walking into as well. Yeah, too
Well, you're about to feel
What goes with the beaches boy, huh? Wait, what?
You miss the opportunity they doesn't matter. Yeah, he okay. It was so close
It was just on the bitches on the beach
There you go boy. All right. That's me. Fantastic. Okay. Okay
I'm teaching them a life lesson real quick
All right, so you better go up to the counter there
Right talk to the bank teller and once you go up there you're gonna go to your paycheck and you're gonna withdraw
Okay, okay. All right. Follow me
Oh, you don't mind if we step in here as well
Draws
I
500 dot
Yeah, there seems to be a problem. I only have five
Do you have a phone number or a card? I can take that on so I can call you
Yeah, but do you check your paycheck?
You can you can take my assistance number Molly. She's in a lovely limo outside
You'll see it. It's like really chrome and pretty you should get her number
Just say your just say mr. Whipple who told me to give my contact information on the commissioner for potential
Oh, I don't know what you're gonna call party with with your police folk. Yeah
She'll be really excited to see if she loves the police. Oh
wonderful
Okay, so dad there's a problem I only have $500 something's wrong with the numbers. Yeah, but but did you get your paycheck?
Okay, let me look at that
She's swiveling the monitor around so you could see it. All right
You know it said it said it's on the top. It's on the top of the model. Can you see that?
What does it say at the top?
So it looks like what a hundred and eighty five dollars dad. That's it. I
Feel like I've been working all day. I thought you're patient that that was it. Yeah, hundred eighty five dollars. Thank you so much
Okay, it's disgusting it's fucking filthy. I did have to live off of building the future yikes
What's the point of it together? We build the future
Just give up exactly
Exactly that and that's why we don't live like that right here damn right God
All right, let's get a sale some food now how much money we have I fucked this up
I don't have
I think it was the casino, can I, I'm not going to fuck with that.
Sir, let me uh, let me show it to you right now.
Oh, fantastic.
Nice to meet you, Commissioner Dawson.
I'll be in touch.
Nice to meet you, Mr. Dawson.
You want to ride on the left this time.
My problems.
I'll go around, dad.
Nice to meet you, Mr. Dawson.
I see you met Molly.
Yes, I have.
Likewise, I'll be sure of the casino.
Sir, yes, sir.
Mr. Dawson?
Yes, I did. It was nice meeting you.
Molly, you got to unlock it.
Hello, Director James.
Do you have your...
your team?
All right
See on the phone or something
Do you have food because if not we still have to go to the bugger shot real quick we are desperate for some
You guys need food as well. Yeah, I'll take some food. I do sure
And this limo just drives like a breeze just another five of five minutes. I apologize. I don't like to make people wait
Okay, so get in there and get out real quick got it
I've never done something like this before so so if there's a standard that needs to be made you need to let me know
She's like catering good you need a fluffer
Her a make-up a second fluffer
I'm sorry, I'm sorry. You don't provide those services as a director. You don't have your hair make-up team on standby for my son.
Well, I did not know I needed to provide, sis.
Well, we're doing quite a productive shoot, are we not?
Yes, alright. Don't worry. My team are on their own.
You know your vocation, so I trust you to make sure all that is accounted for.
Yes, alright, well my team is very flexible and they are ready to grip on camera and fluff
all they need.
We're just waiting on you.
Alright, okay, we'll be posting up there soon, so I hope you guys are sharing ideas
and all over the world.
Oh no, this is not going to work in the drive-thru.
You got it.
Oh, fuck.
Do you know what you want, sir?
Oh, the menu's right here. Okay, perfect. You might end up rolling down our son's window so we can see. Actually, I see just fine.
I'll take a hot dog.
I'll have a hot dog.
There's a rat right here.
yeah everything literally everything you have put everything on it yes put
everything on it you know everything I said everything yes I do want I want
that too yes everything you said everything and she says you wanted a
baby come in the conversation boy yeah I fucking I fucking want everything
stupid fucking idiot you're right sorry I'll just take a hot dog and a drink
that's all I want thank you
this mall is anything you'd like
please
We're just gonna take
You're welcome.
Hi, welcome in.
5 number 7?
What can I get for you, man?
She's possible to get...
Alright, 5 number 7's coming.
It's gonna be 7, he's gonna, uh,
go ahead and swipe
the card right here, or you can bot me again.
You got it?
Oh, I don't fucking reach it from here.
I can't hear anything. Holy fuck, right here.
Oh my god.
I'm gonna see how it goes.
Do you got it?
Yeah, I'm gonna hold on to the cash point, please. Go ahead and try to be caught, alright?
Alright, so what you're gonna do, son, is, uh, you know how you can be a bit expressive?
The same way that you wanna hand your wallet over.
We'll go money stuff, please.
You'll hand your wallet. You understand me, right?
I don't have a wallet.
I don't have a lot.
Oh, okay.
Special...
Money.
Cash.
Um, the thing...
Split.
Um, okay.
You're going to be as fast as a Formula One driver, boy.
How much?
How much?
How much is it cost?
How much is it cost?
This is...
$77 off the top.
$77.9.
Okay.
Um, would you like a milkshake or anything?
You know what's up, moneymaster?
I got to just give me a second.
Just the...
Spunks.
What the fuck did my cash go?
Oh, split.
Okay, perfect.
Okay.
I don't know how this peasantry fucking currency works.
I don't know what to do.
I don't know what to do.
Did you ring us up, ma'am?
What?
I'm sorry.
I'm sorry.
Honey, no, if it rang us up, boy.
Did you ring us up?
Yeah, okay, listen.
Do you want to spend some on your ruddy trumps?
Like any special sauce that's a Pildesauce?
Maybe this one is short white.
It's a light sauce.
All right, do we have to go inside?
I'm trying to do a waste of all time.
I might have been.
Don't worry about that.
You seem very rich and nice.
Well, uh, I believe my son's gonna be pulling up,
so you wanna go ahead and ring up in seven, seven minutes?
I'll take care of it anyway.
Susie, you have to do the drinks yourself at the family thingy.
Okay, oh shit.
Hey, Mr. McGurray, how's it going?
Alright, okay, so let's try this again.
Uh, yeah, I want the one with the $77.
The whole shebang.
I'll take the mice, please.
sounds good, so I sit here, I sit here, okay.
All right, okay, so here's your drinks.
Coffee, I'll get that red for you, okay?
This place fucking sucks.
Thank you.
There you go, all with ice.
Lovely.
And then the rest of your order will be up very shortly.
Hey, how's the five glissies going, Sarah?
I'd like to appreciate it, thank you.
Oh my god, this place is a fucker.
refill on those drinks here let me let me get them drinks I got to refill them up for you let me let me get them
yep yep sure thing so sorry so sorry for you
oh no worries no worries they go
what are you gonna fill them up
to the brim to the brim
and you then five gluins or five drinks
appreciate that thank you um no problem no problem
sir are these abacus what's the problem
nice ascolt
I'm working on the br- the gluins
okay here you go max everything's ready for you
I'll fill those up to the brim.
Ah, much appreciated, thank you.
Perfect. They're perfect.
You have another dog.
Thank you for something.
I'm just taking this in.
This is crazy.
You have a lovely rest of your day.
Thank you.
Thank you.
Thank you.
Sir, your order will be up soon, okay?
Yeah.
We're working on it.
You got a dead person on the floor over there.
Just let you know.
Over what?
And a fucking rat.
It's whatever.
Just let you know.
Oh, that's Bill.
This is Pat Rat.
Don't worry about that.
Oh
You got homeless and rats infecting burger shops ladies crazy
Those are our friends, they're not homeless
Everyone
Mr. Pink shot man, I got you are you all to here okay? Well, thank you very much
Yep
What'd you say?
What's your name mister? My name's fucking Kevin so stressful. I'm nice to meet you fucking Kevin. My name's Ash
Yeah, you choose place fucking sucks
Yeah, go save me!
I'm coming to Burger King!
You were at a hot dog!
Thank you!
No, what the fuck?
Holy shit, this place fucking blows, Dad. This is horrible.
Yo, blast it on the socials then, son.
Fuckin' right, I will. Jesus Christ.
I don't know why the hell we'd ever go here.
Whoa, hold on, hold on, I'm trying to get in the back here.
There we go. All right, I got the glizzies and the drinks. You want me to dish them out now?
You guys want to eat when we get there? What do you want to do?
Uh, we'll go ahead and you can eat your meal and you can put the rest in the,
maybe you can try to inch your way up to the front and actually there's a side compartment here in
the back. So why don't you put them in there and then I'll grab them and then we'll go from there.
Yeah.
Should I take a stochocinos, sir?
All right, I put them in the container.
Yes, yes.
Right in front of us.
Wait, I'm sorry.
I thought I ordered seven combos.
Why do I only see two hot dogs?
Son.
Son.
Son.
Sorry, sorry, sorry.
I was just putting all the food in stuff away.
So there's five.
There's five.
i think you got scammed
and you got scammed
no i haven't eaten anything dad i'm starving i'm just gonna wait but yeah
they scammed us
there were rats there was a fucking dead person they said they were just
sleeping or
their friend but no he was either homeless and or dead i don't know wait i
may i may just scrambled up the message it was number sevens that are
all right i think i may have ordered just five
i guess i was thinking i was holding
i'm still gonna i'm still gonna tweet about him and bought it
Perfect. Yeah, go ahead and bought that
I mean, let me get me craft this here this here little social post. All right, go ahead and go ahead and
Well actually you could use your social post not a slam on the book or something
could also promote the casino at the same time. I'll do both. I'll do both.
You're so right. You could be like about about to do about a nice video shoot
with this director here, you know what I'm saying? That's pretty good. That's
pretty good. Okay, let's do that. Oh god, my bad. It's all my fault. My fault. My fault. It's on me.
Oh my god. The room is at your door, pal. It's all in your door, boy.
It's all right. Let me try that again. Let me try that again. Circle around. Circle around.
circle around do it again do it again circle around all right that was
embarrassing boy in front of the director no mess
I'll do a cool thing for you Kevin don't worry thank you thank you Molly
you got this
I
Yeah, so anyways, I just got done, you know banging like eight bitches the six or seven bitches at the same time
Well, well, well nice to meet you mr. Director, what was your name's Kevin?
My name is James Marco St. Marco and you are my lead actor, Kevin Whippaloo.
That's me.
I don't know if you see my posts but I'm pretty famous.
It's not a big deal but whatever.
I'm ready to do a little promotional video.
Let me give you a European style hug.
Oh wow, look at that.
You smell nice.
You smell nice Marco.
Thank you.
It is a little bit like chocolate and some cigarettes.
You know I've been sniffing the apartments and everyone's broke poor disgusting and fat, so it's good. It's a nice change of pace
Right so Kevin
Today we are going to make viral style videoings for the internet and we're gonna make you look like a big-time chat
So
Do you have any ideas for what you want to be filming or how you want to show people that you're a man about town in charge?
Well, you know, I like the way you talk, Marco. Me and my dad were talking and we agreed that, you know, you with the vision and the talent should really lead all the direction here as you are the director.
I'm glad you've said this. I'm because I am joined by my assistant director, my director of photography, my head of HR or intimacy coordinator, and my camera person.
And we were talking and we were thinking that we should throw you big-time yacht party
But you want a boat?
Get with gas, you know real fly and boo
And then we have you shaking it and talking about how easy it is to make money gambling
And so if you don't make money gambling you suck that you're genetically inferior
And get me bring you back to the casino boom big finale you Kevin Hart go all in on a hand
And then it cuts right before the card is revealed. Can we get this done in two hours?
Yeah
Oh, yeah, that should be very easy not to worry my friends. We have to
Yes
Perfect, okay, I mean I'm down for anything you want me to eat. I'm gonna trust you
Mark of my dad picked you out. So my dad knows what's up. So whatever you want me to do. I'll do it. I'll fucking do it
Do you like where?
You know
You like getting late, okay, listen, not really
Oh, not really. No, it's gonna be a tough one like zero desire
How's your testosterone levels?
They're a little low. I've been on socials too.
I've been reading things around here and there.
We could tell how you got out of that limo like that.
Yeah.
But it's okay. We're going to make you look real good.
How do you feel about putting on cornrows?
The fuck is a cornrow?
A hairstyle.
We want to make you more approachable by the urban youth.
Yeah.
Am I not approachable?
You're a little bit more international.
What is what does that mean? What does that mean? You're a little you white people are all the same basically is what I'm trying to say
You're all so white
Are you racist Japanese and you're racist? Oh, I'm now I'm racist
Marco what you what about wearing a do rat?
We do need you to okay, I do I can wear that fine
Is that what a hood of a brand called for us by us?
would know but i'll do what do you want me to do
alright we're gonna go around the street maybe pick you out your first
costume
you see for our first shot we're gonna need to have you gambling in the casino
this is going to be a grand finale you're going to double down triple down
quadruple down hit it stay with it stick it
okay and then fancy for this first shot yes
let's walk around the corner get you outfitted come back here and then we'll
shoot
you three
Say here, go inside, pick out a good location for some of these pick-ups and start framing.
We'll be back in two minutes with a dressed talent.
Chop chop, let's work!
This guy's got it, no one else!
So, Reverend, tell me a little bit about yourself.
Well, um, you know, this is my first opportunity.
I've never, I'm never gonna work a job, but my dad is gonna have me run this casino,
and I don't think it can be that hard, so it's whatever.
Right um, I'm always you know banging bitches on the beach. That's what I've been doing and my dad flew me in
He's like hey you got this opportunity. You know you're really talented, so name one bitch name one bitch
That you let the road Carlos. Hey shit. Let's go around
What's that?
You know
He can't even name one of the bitches that he banged this is gonna be bad I
I mean, I can name them, but it's like there's NDAs, man.
Oh, man. That's the next level shit.
Yeah.
So rather than getting canceled now, you'll get canceled 20 years from now.
What?
When the NDAs are all done.
Oh. Yeah. What the fuck are you talking about?
Don't worry about it.
He really doesn't get laid.
So for this day we are going to need you to draw inspiration maybe from like
Erector in a movie or films that you think is really macho haha yeah so
example who do you think is very like macho cool guy? Macho Molly's fucking
sick she's cool she's my assistant she's pretty cool okay that's literally the
opposite of what I want. Molly is a woman yet. Yeah, but she's awesome.
Right, well I'm thinking macho like give me testosterone, big hairy testicles.
Arnold Schwarzenegger. All right, this is a little dated.
What did you just say about Arnold? A little dated. Arnold's in his 70s.
It's a little old. Yeah, but he's still timeless classic.
Okay, this is true. I'm going to need you to go ahead and pick out an outfit that you think Arnold Schwarzenegger would...
Okay.
But I don't have his body type.
Uh-oh.
Right, but um, whatever he would wear as if it was tailored to your body.
I see.
Just imagine you're leaving your wife at home and going on a date with your cleaning lady to sire a child that eventually becomes a bodybuilder.
Alright, and where do I take- oh, I guess I'll take a selection up here, right?
Anywhere is fine. They'll bring the clothes to you. We need some options. Big talent here, Ponsby's, please.
Anywhere is fine.
Do you come to Ponsby's often?
We have that in multiple colors.
Upper body.
This is sick, right? Flames?
flames oh um we are sinking more like black tie like formal you're going out
like um the rack you know what I'm saying like Sammy Davis Jr. except white
and with two eyes oh I like this wow so chic all right we'll go with a big long
trench coat yes this is good you got to do something about those shoes you gotta
get some shoes on okay I'm working I'm working I also like your ass cart it's
kind of like a Scooby-Doo mysteries but sexy how does this how's this
I
This will work if you think this is good. I like it. It's kind of blade rather. I
Don't think I can yeah, it's all about you feeling comfortable. Do you can't afford it?
It's not as my dad. No, he has my money. Where's my dad?
But I thought you were like big American
I'm big money big money, but I don't have it
Well, this is I mean we can go to a bingo if it would be more in your price range
I just thought that you would be more comfortable like a pawn speed
No, I mean you're right. I can afford this is what you were used to
Who how's out of these shoes? No, I like the this looks good
Yeah, it's great. I
Think I can't let me see me see me see you hold on
You got a call your daddy. I got it. Well wait insufficient funds
Oh, no, his car's getting the clock.
This is...
May I speak to my associates quickly?
Yeah.
Yes, this is the most embarrassing thing, and I'm worried it's going to ruin his confidence.
He's a Meri-Pionepo baby.
Yes, if he gets bounced out for being too poor at the closing store before we even start,
I feel like he won't be able to do it, but...
Let me call my dad!
Oh, sorry! No, no, we're just talking about, um, craft services, and how we're going to feed the set.
I need to get my dad, he's gonna help me afford this.
This is so fucking jiggly.
We are fucked. We have to shoot around a lot of this.
Shut up!
Hey, dad!
God, my...
What hole is huckering with how embarrassed we are?
I'm at the store right now, and I just don't have any funds for the for the clothes
But I know I have the money and I can afford it
So if you can come to the clothing store and buy it for me so I can you know dress up for the commercial
Five four hundred and seventy dollars
How do I see that
Oh Jesus, this definitely even used his fucking bandra!
Aw man, we're probably gonna have to go to a Western Indian so he can get that money.
No, we-we-we-we ought to do some cool back-and-news first paycheck
so he can understand how the pours are like, okay?
Now son, you may have to install the bank app on your phone.
Why isn't-why isn't it already on the phone?
Alright, let me find this. How do I get-how do I download an app here?
Oh, the app's still on there.
Jesus Christ!
Oh no.
Oh, I see. Okay. It's downloading.
You can actually have a good one.
I got it. I got it.
It's downloading. It's downloading. Give it a second.
It's great. Like the boy in the bubble.
Dad, they're making fun of me.
No, we're just talking about, um,
shock during the day. Sorry about that.
He's going under medical crisis.
So you need to, you need a whole
to figure out this identification number.
Oh, I'm working. I'm working. I'm working.
Oh, man. He's had his hand held
every situation in his life.
So do you have me on speakerphone?
I'll take you off.
You need to take the range, boy.
Come on.
I'm working on it.
I feel like I'm working with-
I'm working on it.
I'm working on it.
Okay.
Oh.
Okay, well hold on.
I'm about to find the app.
Where's the bank?
I downloaded it.
Where is it?
Some people just stumbled their way to the top.
It's green.
It is green.
I found it. I found it. It's here. I found it.
Bank four net us, boy.
Okay. Okay. I got it. Are you ready, Dad?
I've been in ready.
Okay. Okay. Hold it.
Okay. So it's zero zero one zero nine zero four.
Take as long as you like.
Five hundred seventy five dollars.
Yeah.
I love you.
There you go. There you go.
I love you.
I'm sure he loves you, too.
He said it, he was saying it, you know.
No, he said it, he said it.
Yeah, sure he did.
Let's go ahead and get you in that car.
How do we feel about this shirt?
Oh, um, oh.
Well, how about this this looks like it would probably school
Yeah, I'm gonna stick with your formal look. Oh, yeah, very
You you tell me a Chinese accent. Oh, yeah, I'm not gonna do that
You already got me feeling bad for being white
you this is more like kung fu master than it is like high roller okay how about this how about this
that is a dirty sweatshirt okay how about this
you look like a gay italian motorcycleist okay all right how about this
Oh, yeah, yeah, yes, yeah.
Okay, so we're gonna play in this.
Okay, alright, I'll wear this.
Alright.
You look really good, Kevin.
You're doing a good job.
The shoes.
Alright, the shoes.
Oh, yeah, you need to get some shoes.
Very nice.
Alright, let's go ahead and get you checked out.
What the fuck are these?
The foes are called flippers for everything to water.
How do we feel about the pants?
They're very sharp.
You kind of look like Ryan Gosling if you had a few extra muscles.
Alright I'm ready.
Let's do it.
Alright!
Let's go!
This shit is extremely uncomfortable, I won't lie.
Really?
You look so good in it.
Well, you know, beauty is pain.
You've got to suffer for the shot.
God.
Who's actually-
Alright, so-
Everything's gonna be alright.
This shit's gonna make you look so good.
You're going to be playing opposite my...
...here.
And my DP.
Oh shit, beef is calling me, hold up.
Yes, Dr. B.
Are you nervous about that shoot?
I'm actually rather nervous, yeah, actually.
You've never done anything like this before?
Well, I did post on my socials and I got over a thousand favorites.
I'm just working on an ad for the new casino.
Well, that must have thought pretty good.
This amazingly talented Kevin Whippaloo, he is really, really talented.
Yes, I can see how.
Why are there police here?
Yes, if you want, I've never been to the casino.
Help us.
It's extremely nice, just you wait.
If you bring some food.
You'll regret shit talking me.
I'm just me mostly because I don't have a thousand dollars and I'm sorry casinos closed
oh god cuz he could see the big C at the what the what the big C the owner this bitch
that that's me what's going on oh oh okay well pleasure me I was you know
taking a look around this you know yeah well nice to meet you too my name is
Kevin Whippaloo we are currently closed we're doing a little photo shoot
advertisement you know so I'm gonna have to ask you to leave the premises
immediately so long you need that security for those well we will you know
what we will in time and we're gonna be doing interviews as soon as we finish
our advertisement oh yeah he might need a job out there but currently you are
trespassing please you must leave the premises most embarrassing okay I did
not go up seven floors in this the establishment at all I'm gonna share my
number with you mr. Whipple who was it I'm not gonna give you my number but I
can give you my assistance number Molly all right who's your assistant her name
is Molly, you want me to give you a number? There's a playground. I guess yeah, let me get Molly's number.
What is going on with our talent? Hold on one second guys, hang on.
Okay, are you ready? Her name, her number is 987.
You can just like click the, no I can't do that, can't do that, can't do that. You ready?
All right, nine eight seven three nine two four six four five
All right, I appreciate you all right. Thank you so much
Big see you take care of stuff. Okay
Okay, all right. Well nice to meet you. I'm trying to I'm trying to get this bitch
Oh, I'm trying to make money in time in time. Have a good one officers. Yep. Thank you
Brace your big see you take it. Oh you want to talk about the security problem? No, we'll tell him later
How do I close this door?
Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait!
Now we have closed the doors, the doors are closing!
Let us go cough.
Okay, but the thing is, this thing might get shot up, though.
Now, this is faulted.
You might want to redo this.
Oh, God.
Yeah, well, you know what?
We will fucking work.
Get the fuck off the premises!
Oh, my God!
Okay, okay.
I gotta get this door locked.
Wow.
Okay, alright, now, sorry about that.
Hey, why was he calling it a big C?
see because I'm the big casino owner that's right I see I'm Kevin our crew is
on the playground ground level you know how to get there playground ground
level playground the fuck does that mean no man some people really do stumble
that stumbled their way up to the top huh what is that what is playground
to grant number one fucking follow follow me follow me this way all right
elevators I'm working this way over his or so why are there why are there people
on the floor so what the hell is your crew doing back here um what the hell is
this for you oh these are all the extras in case we need to shoot here okay
all right wow this is nice yeah this is the casino when it opens it's gonna be
amazing you gotta not fuck this shoot up she please coordinate with ginger to
find us where she is? Yeah, absolutely. Give me a second. I
gotta call my assistant. Where is Molly?
Hey, yeah, we're at. We're at the big casino.
Yeah, we're in the basement big casino floor. We're right at the bottom of the first can't miss us
Interesting
Well, this guy's paying us a lot
All right, so what are we doing?
We're just waiting on my team. They've had up the shot now for this first shot
I want to get you like just normal paying of poker or blackjack or something
I see you okay, and then we're gonna have you win a hand and then I want you making wild
Brutus gestures you're you're pulling on your cock and you're screaming and you know
Hey motherfucker right here right here. You see this?
With lots of ball scratch, okay, like showing him my nuts on my dad's
All right, show us the shot location game heaven follow us you guys inside
Yeah, we're in the casino on the ground floor dad
Okay, okay, we'll be waiting for you. We'll see you soon
Okay, fuck, we gotta fix him a little more. Shit.
Oh my god, so many things.
Fuck, my monitor.
Okay.
All right
Where they go fuck I was fixing my shit
Yeah, I'm right here right here. Sorry. I was on my phone. I'm over here behind you
All right, sorry about that
My dad and my assistant are on their way and now where I'm ready to get shooting. Let's do this
Okay, let's go Kevin follow us a short on time now
It's gonna be alright, Kevin. Don't have a panic attack. We're gonna get this all done.
I'm freakin' the fuck out, man!
Yeah.
Alright.
Kevin, we're going to have an open shot of you looking very cool and mysterious in that corner, please.
In this corner? Okay. Alright.
Zero, let's get camera up, please! Camera up!
Cool and mysterious. Okay, let's see. Quick emotes.
There's two emotes.
Uh, please? No?
That's his favorite.
Where's my camera, man?
It's like a lean.
I think but but it's over here.
Oh.
Yes, it was a different corner in the spoof of a huge aquarium in the back.
Oh.
Yes.
Oh yeah, yeah.
Kevin, please follow me. We're doing some reshoots apparently. This is not the location. Come with me.
This is cool. I'm serious though, right? Look.
Where have you been?
Yes, but oh, your dad is here. Come on, hurry, hurry, hurry.
Okay, okay, all right.
You're not able to post on the socials at this point in time. You understand me?
This is purely a private private production. Oh, yeah, absolutely. Just look at the
real quick something in the basement. I might suggest if you all are
Who's who's of the August for here? Yeah, I'll send someone for you in two seconds. Hold on. I
believe this
Yes
Who-who be taking the main shots?
That is this gentleman here.
The fuck?
Alright, perfect. Uh...
Are you aware that, uh...
You might be able to...
Defend the noise around us so we can focus on...
The core subject matter.
If you fall.
Indeed.
But you can't.
Yes, we're zero.
I try to make sure that that's locked in so we're...
We're not hearing a bunch of kerfuffle happening at the bar.
Lots of guffuffles.
Oh, and just make sure that you get me the CLEAN video so that
that editor can fax together everything.
All right, for short, let's get clear on set here.
I need vitality and please fly in.
Captain, is this booth over here?
Center on the fish tank.
Okay.
All right, center on the fish tank, huh?
Takeoff, last looks.
Zero, fly camera for close push.
Okay, what am I doing?
What am I doing?
Okay, Kevin, here we go. The first shot. I need you looking very cool, very mysterious.
You're alone at a casino. Tonight is going to be filled with some chocolate.
But first, you need to be here alone and show everybody how dark and mysterious Alpha you are.
you are so you're gonna sit right in the middle here you're gonna look off into
the distance right he's going to push in slowly with the camera and when he
gets very close I need you to stand up and look very cool all right let's lock
it down people no more traffic this is a live set
I'm a roll sound speeds alpha zero the marrow shot one sit here in your casino
I'm stressful camera and
it's gone on hello beef it's me James Marko and Marco am I doing this right
Yeah, yeah, I stand here, right?
Yeah, just keep closing like that.
Okay, okay, and then what?
Keep looking smug, just like that.
Okay, alright, I'm smugged as fuck.
It's just below my head.
Make sure you verify, make him flash his ID on the door for, alright?
Alright, here we go, camera on!
They're verbal contract, you already noticed.
They're anything she's working on, document or report
or tell you about, right?
And push in, nice, low zero.
The glass is on, oh my god, you're bright.
Yes, now give me a dolly pattern.
And then I need you to do something cool in three,
two, one, school.
Uh.
Uh.
who has their phone on I swear to god
how do I put my glasses on?
real quick, look, this is your last name
Ochiha, Ochiha sir
yes sir, come and see me
I've heard you're quite versed in like action
quite flexible, is there a stunt that maybe you could try to teach your son here to do something cool or
You think you can go believe me?
Absolutely.
Just pay me with just all your bills.
Absolutely.
Is that from where we can do?
The pose, it is.
Absolutely.
Back to the pose?
OK, back to the pose.
Hang on.
All right, so you're going to go from that first pose, OK?
And you know how to do your poses, right?
Yeah, yeah, I'm a pose man.
Good, good, good.
We're going to get you a nice, a nice, really good pose.
That makes you look cool, all right?
You're going to go for a, you're going to go for a,
Let's do guitar
Everybody love rockstar guitar guitar pose. Okay, we're dance
Yeah, yeah, so go from your pose to air guitar. It's gonna look so cool. Everybody's gonna sit. I think you look so amazed
All right, let me let me get the set
That's great from the stock wall
Everybody loves an air guitar
There we go! Alright!
Go! Camera rolls!
Ond!
He's gonna teleport me though.
Slow push!
Slow push!
Alright, land camera!
Ond! Give me the guitar! Now!
I moved. I teleported. I tell him.
What am I talking about?
That was sick!
Who's the rock star?
That's sick.
Cut! Cut! Cut! Alright!
That's it for shot two!
Oh, shot one, sorry, shot two.
I want to get an over the shoulder
of you walking through the casino.
So, zero, you're gonna line up behind talent starting here.
You have to do nice, slow walk through the casino
and you're gonna trail behind him.
Can you do that for me, zero?
Yeah, indubiously.
All right, give me this.
Oh, stop coordinated.
What might be the best gate or...
Oh yeah, what happened?
A beautiful gate for you.
And we really wanna admit power for this one.
Okay, well psychologically we've analyzed one of the best gates for this is probably gonna be
I'm thinking right here probably Chi Chi. I think Chi Chi is gonna be absolutely perfect for you
Okay, add a little bit of charisma testosterone power Chi Chi walk you want Chi Chi walk
All right, so you'll Chi Chi walk through here like this. Yeah, there we go. Just like hold on you're untouched
All right, absolutely
you right here you're going to be an extra for this shot as Kevin walks by I
need you to look like you've just seen the sexiest man you've ever seen in your
entire fucking life can you do that for me perfect most of it let's get you
back on your one please okay back way over here yes your walk starts here all
All right, all right, all right, Kevin, your night is just beginning real quick. Oh, Mr. Mark
Yeah, show you something real quick. All right, fucking god damn it. You I
Got an hour 30 left. I gotta go
This is a lot of people here
Do I I'll stay on my one
We stand my one we stand my one
Oh, yeah, this is good.
Alright.
All right
Actually, can you get this tape to VP? She's going to mark out our locations for us, didn't her? I need to fucking these locations
My glasses on true
I'm staying here on my one fucking phenomenon. Okay. Thank you. I appreciate that. I think I am too. I think I
Great the the camera. It's
The action. I love it when you see it. Yeah, the action. Are you sure this is the right one late after this?
Yeah, yeah, no, that's absolutely the it's a very very popular walk right now. Okay. All right. I know that was like the new trend
Yeah, they call it the cheat sheet. It's a trending thing. Okay. I'm talking right now. I'm trending. I'm trending
Maybe I'll be forget
Where's Molly
Everybody clear set if you're not in the, don't make yourself fucking scarce.
I don't want to see you in the edit.
All right.
It's a thing.
Uh, Mr. Cameraman, are you seeing the Mark's tape on your camera?
Because if so, what we'll do is we can place the Mark initially.
We can do a nice little pre-run so he knows where his Mark is, and then from there we
could, uh, remove the Mark.
Oh, there's, there is.
We still know where his place is.
You know what I'm saying?
So that, uh, the professionals will stay.
Indeed indeed
All right, you have a mother setting up out. I need to check in with you. All right. This is a very important shot
This is like cool guy
Brad Pitt unlike fight club. We have very cool music
All right, all right
In your head, I want you thinking I am the coolest baddest motherfucker ever
But I fucking am I look you see the I got the cheat you want
Yeah, and she's very popular, very trendy, so this is gonna be the shot that people are gonna mimic for years to come after they-
Timeless.
Alright, so, here is your action footage. You're gonna walk out through that awning, you're gonna walk past that woman there, who can do adore you, you're not gonna stop for a single second, you don't care, you're fucking cool for our violation, that's right, and you're gonna walk over to one of the gambling tables, and you're gonna sit, can you do that?
for me Kevin now all right can I can I are the am I allowed to sit at these
tables I don't know your father owns the place ask you dad am I allowed to sit at
these tables or am I got to get extra permission or anything we might have to
check with mr. A's they may not be available to be sat at at this point I
I see.
But there is some improvisation we can do.
And I think it might be a bit of a power move.
I see what you're saying.
Sit, stand atop the table.
Ooh, I like this, I like this, I like this.
Why don't we go over to the tables real quick
and see what that might look like with our stunts on me?
Oh my god, man.
All right.
Mr. Mchihar.
Stay here.
We'll be right back.
Moments away.
Moments away, people.
Thank you.
Oh, where's Mr. Beast?
Did he?
Yeah, I'm not going to be able to walk over and press E.
I don't think I can even place myself on it.
Oh, it's all right.
Ooh, I'm liking this.
Standing at the table.
You fucking standing at the table.
You're standing here.
Eye contact.
Hit me.
Double it.
Split it.
Fuck it.
Split it up and spit on it.
Making money.
Do you want me to say these things?
This is no extra feel free to feel free to interact with her in any way whatsoever. She's an incredible actress
Oh stupid big girl. We're quick for anything. Oh stunk warning
You think there's a nicer
Placement he could be on top of the table. No farm aura as it were. Yeah, I think we get him up on this table
Well, here's what I think I think we bring it
I
Think we bring him in right he stands here close up of the cards
He's... funny.
Close up of his eyes, he says, hit me.
Close up of the table, 21.
Next shot, he's on the table.
Get up on the table for me, Kevin.
Up on the table for me briefly.
Uh, hang on.
I don't...
The table's actually quite tough to get up on.
No, listen, listen, there is a...
to the chaos, all right?
You have to squeeze it in between it.
Do I need to show you how it's done?
I got the set, Shirley.
Yeah, get loosey it.
Okay
We have very many times
Come on Kevin. Come on Kevin
Come on Kevin, come on Kevin, come on Kevin, come on Kevin, hang on
Yeah, you give up, come on Kevin
It might be the Chi Chi
Who's the rockstar? Who's the G-Rockstar?
Oh wait, I think I know how to do this
Alright Kevin, come on Kevin
Hey man, come on
Let Daddy in
Hardcore production now man
Yeah, if it's you, come on
Grab his hand, Kevin.
Please?
And his grab his head, man.
Come on, come on!
Grab his head, Kevin.
You're a little over-up, Eastbrook.
Is this it?
Dear God, he's levitating on top of my shoulders.
This is not it, Kevin. This is not fucking it.
On top of the table, sir.
Place yourself on top of the table.
Does he have catatonic panic attacks like this often?
Oh, yes.
part of the soil routine
aww man you're on soil
you can help them from below
Kevin let's get you up on the table Kevin alright
we're gonna make a big movie star
hey hey I got it from below
you get it from up top man
oh there it is hey
there it is
on top of here I mean it's not
it's not brave but it's
accessible
who was that same one
Perfect
I'm gonna want you to do when you get up on that on that table Kevin
You go Kevin
All right close enough let's get the shot smoke cost arms bring it on let lean where'd it go
I found the spot director there it is yeah
Okay.
Oh, sir, sir, I think I found the perfect spot for you.
Dr. B, please have my gluten-free pretzels.
Oh, God.
Okay, right here?
Yes, I think you can prop yourself.
You're talking to this table right here.
Get up on that table, Kevin.
Oh, chill, you can show them how.
If you like.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Yeah, exactly. Wow. How's that? How do you feel about this pose?
Dude, and well, I think what we want we want to get you do bird up there actually
Do the bird I okay the bird because you're on world
So the bird is just sort of symbolizing, you know, hey, I'm the top dog. I'm top eagle, you know
I'm flying above all of you
It's very, very powerful symbolism.
You're gonna look so cool, so many people are gonna mimic forever.
You're gonna go down in history, Kevin.
Everybody loves the bird, it's trending right now.
Kevin, we will work on the bird later. I need you at your home, please.
Okay, I'm coming. He wants either. I have no time.
Alright, everybody, we're going for a take. Everybody at your home, please.
God damn it, there's a cat.
Lock it down.
I got a cat messing with my cables.
Okay, I'm ready.
So I'm walking to that table, and then I'm getting on it, right?
And then freeze and we will down and do another shot. I see okay. All right. I'm with it
Where is my a cam for fuck's sake people? We are limited time here
Zero I need you a cam. Oh
Yes start behind him from right here, please
Yes, thank you, Zero.
Alright, everyone, we're going for a take!
Kevin, are you ready?
I'm ready, I'm ready.
Sound speed! Camera speeds!
Shot two! Kevin, walk!
And...
Oh yes, following Zero.
Is that Mr. Whipplew? Mr. Whipplew? Mr. Whipplew, come here! Mr. Whipplew!
Yes, and follow him to the table now, Zero.
No, no, wait!
Yes, follow. Yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes. Very good.
Oh, yeah.
Oh
And hold it hold it
Nice Kevin very beautiful from you. Do you need some water? Do you need some powder?
I'm I shy I'm ready to get the next one in
All right get back to your one. We're gonna get that same shot from a different angle. I see you calling Molly
You like that shit
Same shot
Walter's eating my cables right now, this is not ideal
good good good fuck very very very good okay hey that's very very good you
did a phenomenal job what do you say everyone's gonna be talking about it
my first dude all right that's not a word number one zero you know what an
accent racist from a different angle this time come on me all right we're
gonna start from but did you show them the night club no no I haven't showed
him anything I just I've been very rushed it's been very chaotic dad's fear
Oh, you're a lead actor?
Yeah.
How impressive is Molly?
Yeah, you like that?
It's pretty good. It's whatever.
It's fine.
He said that she actually sees a little bit me in you now.
Alright, we're going for his second take.
Kevin walks.
This is take number two.
Alright, talent is locked.
Camera is locked.
Sam is running all over.
Am I going to a different table?
No, same thing.
Keep f***ing same shot, different angle walk, having motherf***er, you better walk!
Yes, this is good, this is good, everyone else clear!
Very good.
Doing my job, look me go.
Oh no.
Mr. Whipplew, is that...
Mr. Whipplew!
Mr. Whipplew!
Mr. Whipplew!
Ignored.
This is so stupid.
This is so stupid.
Ah, I can't tell that.
I can't comfortable, say this.
I gotta get this guy out.
Good Mr. Whippeloo, good one.
Very, um...
As the kids call it, I believe, say you have aura, Mr. Whippeloo.
Yes, of course you do.
Plenty of it.
Oh, thank you. I'm doing my best here.
I'm over fucking stim. This is crazy.
Oh, no, you're doing great.
Hey, you like to walk? Apparently it's in fashion.
Everyone's... yes.
Very nice walk, Kevin. I need you at the table.
We're gonna film the Blackjack scene now. Thank you.
All right.
All right.
Want me to get on it?
No, I want you landing right here.
No, you're with me, please.
A-cam.
No, no, Kevin.
No, I need you to play Blackjack.
Thank you now. No, no, this is
All right, go talk to dr. Beef craft services zero you've been great take five guys. We're stopping down for five
I'm gonna talk to my talent here stopping down for five. I just like five minutes. That's five
All right, Kevin very good walking bud. All right this next shot
You're gonna be playing blackjack, but you can't end it because it's intense. I need you standing here
We're gonna get an intense close of your eyes. Okay, I'm playing then I need you to gesture
You can get the card that seals your fate 21 motherfucker
You're gonna get up on the table and then either you're gonna do the bird or you're gonna do the hump to let this deal
I know you own the place
Okay, hang on let me see this
Two months.
Uh, the bird.
Let's do over all of them.
Let's do bird.
Okay.
Yeah, yeah, yeah, I got him on that.
I think hump is ideal.
This hump is ideal.
Okay, I think I have a hump mane.
Hump mane is ideal here.
Well, we've ran the diagnostics.
Turned out it's a little suggestive.
Uh, a lot of birds watch this kind of tint.
So it turns out the bird is actually
gonna be more suitable for this.
So I do a bird. I do a bird.
Yeah.
Alright, Ginger.
Yeah, yeah, the hump might actually not really hit as far as we want it.
It's a little out of it.
Okay, alright, so I'm gonna sit here, I'm gonna hit me.
Yeah, can we hit me?
Bird real quick.
Okay, is he a bird?
Yeah.
Oh, it's gonna be sick.
Yeah.
And maybe you can say,
I'm king of the world!
You got, okay, I'm king of the world!
Yeah, exactly like that, exactly like that.
Okay, alright.
Just run it, okay?
Alright, Mr. C.
So, just to reiterate, you want me to hit me.
Hit me.
Hit me.
And then next scene, on the table, bird.
Yes.
Let me see the bird, please.
I can do the bird, but I don't know if I can do it on the table
Well, let me just see some bird piece bird. I'm a king of the world
Yeah, this is very yeah, I'm liking this a lot
Right, they're gonna love that. We're gonna a that one's gonna be on the Wikipedia page
Yes, I think we're going to have an NFL player do it and after he is
touchdowns down
Yeah, they're going to be doing my thing all the time.
You are my lead talent. You are the most important person on this. Let me ask you a question. How are you for time right now?
I've got a little over an hour.
A little over an hour. Nice. Okay, so we're going to get there until maybe one shot in front of the wheel because I think the wheel is like great feature.
But then maybe get you behind the wheel of a car looking cool
Then final science scene you on yacht
what
Big breasted women, you know dancing shaking. I see a sing or this
Okay, all right now if it worse comes to worse we can we can do this tomorrow as well if we need more time
You look real. Oh, I did not know your schedule was open like this
It is open like this. Yes. Oh wait this is great because we can do we can do some secondary shots in the hood
Because we wanted to show that you kind of are also the ability to be really, you know
Yeah
Yeah, okay, I hear it
It'd be incredible. Yeah, so let's get done we can get today if we need more time. It's due tomorrow
Well, what the cameras think if they saw your dad suggested that you make to add more
or, hmmm, inclusive, that we may be included like one man with very large dong on the yacht,
two shaking and three represented there?
Yes.
Alright, incredible.
I know many men with large dong, do you kind of prefer, and so you're looking for like
twink or bear or like...
Um, what does this mean as it relates to homosexuality?
Well, I mean, like, six or seven sides, you have sides, it's six or seven.
Oh, alright, you want a medium-sized cock?
No, that's quite, that's not medium, that'd be crazy.
You want like...
A real doctor, and actually it's kind of small.
That's not small, that's actually crazy, six or seven is fucking beyond.
Hey, can I argue with the guy who's a real doctor?
sitting like six or seven inches diameter 13 inches long that's insanity that's
insanity this is nothing you can handle this with you know stride fine maybe I
I can't whatever yeah, I'm gonna be dealin
All right, let me get my head cap one moment away
Restful
Says why are you stressful, but you've done a phenomenal job
Holy fuck I'm actually feeling like a land dog. This is ridiculous
Oh
It's gonna wait here
So many combos. Yeah, I'm just trying to like, I'm zoned out. Oh my brain is so overstimmed.
Try table emotes? Man, I'm just gonna burn!
where my head doesn't turn sometimes like right now if I turn my cam my head should turn right
but it's not
so I just look straight ahead permanent it's weird
I hate it
yes
absolutely because if they depart then what they live for exactly
live and exist, that is all it's interesting
it's the walk, I could see it
well I'm permanently like this, at this point
we're not even streaming, we're making a fucking dumbass youtube video
lock it in whatever i may have to restart
how do i turn off social media notifications
let me turn the shut off
okay we're gone
are we ready?
yes we are ready my talent oh my god you're doing so good it's driving me
crazy
everybody gonna know your name they're gonna say i want to be just like kevin
alright zero let me get you to land over here please
Kevin, you're doing great. Zero, for this first shot, very close-up of his eye, very
close-up of the dealer's eyes, and then even more close-up of his eyes, and then even more
close-up of the dealer's eyes, and then very extremely unusually close on his eyes, and
And they very close up on the dealer's eyes, alright grab that for me, thank you.
Right now?
Yes, you're eye acting.
Oh am I, okay I'm looking, I'm in there.
You're doing a great job, Kev.
Good work Kevin. Zero, tell me when we have our coverage.
He's getting the shot of his eyes right now. Thank you.
And see, look at me, I'm gonna go pee. Our eyes next.
Thank you Zero. I'm gonna go pee, they all fucking need me.
That's crazy.
Alright, while we are in this location, 0, can I please get a close up of Kevin's finger pointing at the table?
And give me a finger pointing at the table, please.
Over the shoulder.
OTS shot.
First person. Kevin, go ahead and point for me, baby.
Okay, fuck, fuck, fuck, okay, fuck.
I need you to point at the fucking table.
Am I not?
You're kind of pointing in the air, Kevin.
What? Okay, alright, alright, how about this?
That's, yes, that's it. One more time.
That's it. And hold it for me. And hold it for me.
And hold it.
And, okay, now you're pointing at the ground.
Kevin, point at the table, Kevin. Kevin.
There we go. And hold it, Kevin. And hold...
Oh, shit!
Sorry, I got so much testosterone from watching Saw...
...and that I just had to react that way.
Yeah, this is it.
I'm sorry, sir.
Okay, and let us get the damn shot, Kevin.
You gotta get acting again on this one.
Alright, I'm gonna need you to hear zero wide shot.
And then, Kevin, this is where you go.
Look at me.
Okay, alright. Ready?
Yeah, go!
We're rolling! Sound speeds! On-d!
Hit me!
Okay, Kevin.
Yeah?
This line delivery. This is one of the most tense moments in the whole thing.
I need you to bring me some fucking shit.
Hit me!
Like, no, this is more Batman. I need like, I need like, Alpha Man, you're a child in
South, Southern, in Africa, and you've gotten water for the first time, and hit me!
Hit me!
No, okay.
That's out of two days, Leboi.
Dang, thank you.
And, and, Kevin, you know, you have, you're airing much confidence, you know you're already
gonna win when you say this.
You know, when you say that, you are fucking so, you're fucking so good.
Oh
Yes, almost there
One more time. I want you to squeeze your shrink to hold. Listen. This is old German
Technique squeeze this thing to hold really hard squeeze it squeeze it get a little bit of a twinge
I need you doing this twinge a lip and then go hit me hit me
That's it. Let's roll this zero
Zero, camera up, camera scrolls, camera speed, stop!
Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait!
What if I get like this, like,
the Tarantino zoom in on his face when he says get me?
That's why you're the, in the business, Zero.
All right, new camera direction, camera speed, stop speed!
Zero, are you ready?
Ready, ready!
And Kevin, you're gonna give me one live delivery of this.
Stop down and we're gonna take it again to meet.
have a few takes in the can and ready and shut it me
my dick is hard give it to me again Kevin phenomenal me oh fuck yeah I'm
in my fucking leg oh said one more time hit me
there we go it's free come and stop down
there you got that was it was it cinema you are capable of that I appreciate
the craft services awesome okay what's next we got to get the bird and I'm king
of the world we have yes we now need to go to the sixth floor for this if you
want to go to the world tab by the ox okay wait one more shots here we need a
shot of him winning I'm sitting maybe a wide shot from a different angle maybe
over here and we get the bird all right all right yeah that's the table and give
some fucking
Do you want me to celebrate like talk?
What do you feel about Kevin?
Alright, let's get down to some kind of scenes
There you go.
Waiting for behind the scenes
One moment Kevin, moments away
Alright behind this filming
The speed, sound speeds, talent is ready
He's ready!
Up on!
Shut up!
I'm king of the world!
Wooo!
That's perfect!
Wait, do we actually want to almost recreate the Titanic scene where he brought the lady
behind him as he's feeling king of the world?
We get next scene, I'll bring my famed Fatal in the background there.
Let me get bird one more time. I'm telling you you're gonna want this bird
Okay, the bird the bird
I'm king of the world
We're gonna have more time. I'm sorry sound cut out for a second. Okay, really let him know
Okay, I'm gonna let him know. I'm really gonna go for it
Yeah, just hit it 200%
I'm king of the world!
Hey Marko should we get a burst shot on that actually as well?
Yes, go and get for coverage you coordinate this one. Oh, gee
The shoulder right on the Kevin and we want to just get that nice tight maybe medium frame on him actually and
Kevin that's fucking phenomenal. Yeah, that was good. That was hot. Was that sick? Yes
You man.
Absolutely, absolutely.
Let's just get this one real fast, okay?
All right.
We're just gonna do this one real fast.
You ready, Kevin?
Okay, so what am I doing?
All right.
The exact same thing you did.
Just send one percent, okay?
Okay, a thousand percent.
Camera, sound, speed, blink, and chin.
I'm king of the world!
Woo!
Very fucking dope.
That was perfect.
Zero, thank you so much for that. That is that is the meat. That's the fucking meat right there. That's the meat. That's the meat. We wanted
Yes, zero have that look on your
Good man. Can't wait to see it and post up. Oh
Let's get that this is the roof and then we had it to the yacht folks
We only have about seven minutes left in our shooting day
Hello, my beautiful femme fatale
Oh, rush to the air!
Alright!
Who the fuck are all these people?
Where's the elevator? Oh yeah.
We have to go up.
Oh my god, my run.
What the fuck?
They come in
Yeah, they're going that side that's fine fuck it
You're killing the sidewalk!
Get out!
Alright, we going up dad? 6-4?
Yes.
Uh, we...
I'm a separate, there is a weak capacity, I think the rest of you can probably fit in the other one.
Alright.
We're going to the 6th floor son, you remember the number 6 right?
Yeah, I got 6, I got this, or 7.
I agree I agree I said we needed elevator music
Do do do do do do do do.
I've about to shoot Kevin.
Are you feeling about to shoot Kevin?
I'm feeling fucking phenomenal. It's great.
Everyone's got to, you know, come to the casino.
Again, again, I just want to, you know, make things clear.
And you see here, everything we have done here is strictly confidential.
You understand?
Yes, sir.
If there's any leaked photo, any, uh...
Information not only will your cartridge be terminated but uh perhaps even your life
He said that
Yeah, that's pretty pretty
Down there is ginger
Where is ginger ginger is out looking for and right now, sir. Oh
Okay
the day. She is an excellent director of photography.
So very nice to meet you guys.
Yes, it is the Batal Porto.
I can see Liberty City from here.
Very beautiful.
All right, what are we filming?
There is a really nice table back here, but I don't know what you're
You want him gazing into the city or you want him laying out here with a knife case full of cash?
It's going over here, it's going over here.
No, I think this shot of the city skyline at night is on Della. Yeah.
Look at that, that is incredible.
All right. Can I fill in my femme fatale and Kevin, please?
Now you are having intimate-like moment. You're stricken by a-
Pass.
Oh.
Uh...
All right, Kevin.
No.
What's going on there, bud?
Pass. No bitches.
I'm sorry. No what?
No bitches that are below a six or a seven. Must be at least eight or nine.
Oh, I think she's a very gorgeous woman here.
Pass!
Oh, Kevin, if you- I can step in for that.
Yeah, Uchi can do it, it's fine.
Oh, I think you- definitely should.
Oh, it's Uchi.
It's Uchi.
You white folk are always fucking up my name.
Ah, alright, we're changing our talent.
I'm sorry.
Is that okay?
So much for your time.
Let's fly in Uchi and let's get our canvas set.
Okay, I'm very impressed. Marco, how am I feeling in this one?
Oh, you're very impressed by his wealth. And now you're having like kind of like intimate, like broke back style.
Because you know, moment on.
We're very progressive here.
Yes. So go ahead, pay me selves over there and who'd share my action coordinator anyway. So why don't you give us two very cool positions for this? Yeah.
Okay, it's a- do we need the intimacy coordinator for this?
Because I'm not my specialty.
Well, our intimacy coordinator is right here. She was going to be the talent, but why don't you coach them through this?
Oh, yes, most certainly. This here is a scene of intimacy, isn't it?
We're getting to the point now. In the night, all alone, the two of you are the radioers playing a sweet song.
getting to undress yourself perhaps mr. Whipple you can't look so rich it
perhaps take your coat off should coat okay I was on your hand it has to go
yes but in this scene perhaps if you begin to film sometimes when you get up
the stairs the camera will take off my and you'll throw your coat okay it's a
The coat, you have so many of them.
It's a really sticky coat, I'm trying to figure this out.
What is it, man?
Yeah.
Oh, but you can take off your glasses, at least.
Yeah, take the glasses.
I'm trying to ask you a thought.
All right, glasses are on.
Ooh, I like it.
Perfect.
And you come up the stairs together.
Perhaps even.
I know.
Uti, perhaps you'll be on the couch here waiting for him lined up.
Oh, like an invitation for you to open. Yeah, what's up? Like you caught him in your trap.
Get on here. You stand on here.
And you just
like this. Oh, look at that.
Yeah. Yeah. You've got this. You're going great.
I'm going to look so good.
Oh, yeah. Really looking good.
Yeah, I know what I'll do.
I
Is never gonna happen on this catch mr. Whitblew will come up the stairs here, and you'll be waiting like a prize
I could catch the catch is a canary and you give a few words of invitation. I assume see you can handle that
But you can you could mind improvisation
Yeah, so what do you want me to do on the couch?
you
You come to invite
So I walk up you in a scene of intimacy. Yes, you walk up. Yes, you take off your glasses
You look him in the eyes and he invites you
And you just give in
Okay, and how do I give in? Oh, I like this
He'll show you I see. Yeah, I'll show you
I can't get on any of those things I'll be laying right here
Alright so, from right here, he'll come up here.
He's too much of a hero here, folk.
Right, so the bottom of the stairs, Ms. Whipple, you'll come up here, the stairs, go around, he'll get the shot at you, and then actually replace my children.
Easy.
Am I getting the shots from down below?
I'm so ill, is Jordan flu gay?
No, er, let's do what a director would want it.
Direct?
Yeah, which would be the best shot for him to take from him coming up the stairs from the above or down below
Oh the glasses on right. I think from above is very cool
Here coming up hmm around and then we have the shot with them and hey
All right, everybody. We serve one more thing to get today. So we're trying to get this zero of you are locked and talent is locked
Let's go ahead and run sound. Let's go ahead and run film. All right
This is Uchi and Kevin take one see more
Action
It might actually be the gayest video ever
Why are you like for sore eyes?
You getting this?
I've been waiting all night.
So rich and successful.
I
Why he has a baby
Oh gee good Kevin what's going here, baby?
Admiring I just felt like you were connecting at that in that one scene. I mean, oh gee was
I
Need from you. I'm sorry. I got caught up in the moment. I started choking
Maybe instead of you know, maybe he comes up and I'm already kind of
Getting primed or we like the laying down or do you want to walk up and I'm already
I like how it started.
I like how it's...
Okay, okay, let's do that.
All right, let's get back to our ones.
Kevin, that's you, baby.
All right, I got it this time.
I got it this time.
Just a little bit.
And to the people over here,
but there is sound on this shot,
so please, quiet till I call cuts.
Thank you so much.
All right, Kevin, are you in position?
Yes, I am.
Don't doubt my son, boy.
I'm sorry about this Kevin if you're ready and cameras rolling let's go ahead and take two
Is Kevin a new GR scene for on action?
Okay, we're walking up we're walking up
All right, aren't you a sight for sore eyes?
Well, well, well, what do we have here?
A primed and fresh.
Man, you're so wealthy and successful and the casino is so incredible and you've done
such a great job in pressing your father.
Let me just get behind you here as a bird.
Oh, or so your father son.
I
Father son
I said a promo not a porno
Well, I mean obviously it looks that way right now, but after the cut I mean it's gonna be very tasteful
Oh, I see you're gonna be like it's gonna be a money shot, right?
I mean, I guess we can cut down on a little bit of the humping, but I don't we can do a radio version if you want
We could do we could do when I take the glasses off and bang it cuts from there and then it's up to the mystery. Yeah, yeah
Yeah, how about I let you know
The radio version is he takes up glasses and I'm doing a ball scratch and it's sort of, you know, the rate of PG
I like this so you start with the wide and then when he's not scratching his balls
You can zoom in on Kevin's eyes and Kevin. That's your sign to take your glasses off like wow. Oh, what's going on over there?
Okay, so I walk up and I'm like, whoa
and then I
Need something for in this moment
670 mode Kevin you've been waiting all day for yes yes yes you see him on style and you
do a 670 all right everybody please mr. mr. Marco can you guarantee that it won't be
there I see friends when he's 670 I don't want him getting bullied now this is gonna be a
a professional advertisement, I-I'd say your editor will, uh, make him look...
good.
OW!
My fucking vision!
Alright.
You- you said-
I know, Miss Molly!
You think I am here to make...
children's video?
Or fart cartoons?
I am a fucking artist!
Don't waste my time on this!
So...
I'll show up as hell you're not making children's cartoons based off what I just saw with the
humping.
Okay?
That'd be highly inappropriate.
We're making fucking art here people.
Alright everybody lock it down.
We're gonna get one more take on this.
Kevin are you ready?
Ready?
Alright camera rolls sound speeds.
Everybody quiet on set.
Zero!
Boy, aren't you a sight for sore eyes?
Oh, my.
I
Can think of six or seven things I'd like to do to you
You're so successful you're so successful
I'm almost done. That's it
it. That was great. That was solid. I did notice that you said six seven a full minute
before you did six seven. That but editing can fix that right. I mean, just for the
second it's in the camera. Can we have that one thing not the whole stair sequence again?
Can we have you?
Uchi, can we have you cranking it up?
And then, Kevin, can we have you rip a six, seven
and say it at the same time?
But can you say there's such a good pause?
It's fine.
Whatever I try.
Yeah.
James, should I do like an over the shoulder shot of Uchi
doing his thing?
Over the shoulder, Uchi.
And then, Kevin, I need you to take off your glasses
and say six, seven at the same time you do it.
At the same time as I take the glasses off
or the same time as I do the six, seven?
Note, take the fucking glasses off and then say 6, 7 while you're doing it.
Oh, I see. Okay, so all right, got it.
All right, unquiet camera rolls, sound speeds, position 1, uchi start cranking, and...
All right, gonna crank now, standby?
Create that ditch.
6
7
What the fuck have it no take the glasses off didn't say six seven as you do the fucking emote
That's all you so you wanted me to actually six seven. Okay. I didn't know I was confused
What
the glasses off and you'd oh yeah it happens so I understand what you want
it's you want it like this you want like well let me let me do it
6 7 hold on need a fluff real quick
Right that was good
Interesting
Take your time, Uchi.
You get the shot?
This game is fresh.
Hey, you get the shot?
Oh, I don't know if we're going to get the shot.
You might have to hold it for a little while.
I
Get in this shit behind the scenes
You're really holding this scene you cheese is crazy. I'm impressed. Oh, I gotta they keep that
It's getting up close here right at right over the shoulder. Don't be shy. All right. This is a footy
I've been in a likapoo here, man.
Yeah, what do you see?
I see a man who just wants to live up to,
you know, his father's expectations.
You're my favorite, you don't stop cranking, okay?
Keep that going.
It should be just as natural as breathing.
Yeah, I just keep saying this up.
He is a doctor, he is a doctor, remember.
I see a man who's trying to live up to his fucking face and-
Yeah, yeah.
That's what I f-
Hey, now what do you see here?
Molly!
Molly, get in here!
Hey, what else?
I-
You're f-
I'm not-
Come on, Molly, it'll be great!
Come on!
I'm gonna take all this-
And but-
Oh, hey, oh, Kevin just gave you the-
It's alright, mom.
Alright, now, Kevin-
Hey, here, man, go ahead, be just-
He's trying to live up to your father's expectations!
Yeah, and?
I'm so sorry. I am
Had to do some meditating. Oh, back to our ones. Are we still getting that? We were just want keeping ourselves warm
Let's fly
Well, you want me to come back okay, hang on just give me a second
yes all right zero back to all right let's what last time are we doing a
title OTS we're doing a title to us yes crime art glasses removed six all right
all right yes yes one moment please let's hold for cat
all right all right
I
We ready ready when you are okay watch. Oh here we are here. All right ready sound speeds camera rolls on
I got six or seven things I want to do to you
Oh, that's okay. Yeah, that's it. All right cut. We got it didn't do this doesn't work
Hey, good job, guy.
Yeah, we I think I think we got a lot of cover for that one.
All right.
You covered a lot.
That's for sure.
That line delivery was all day.
Yeah, I mean, I wish I was.
Guys, that was perfect.
All right, let's head on down to the lobby.
I'm going to talk to D.P.
We got to get to the yacht folks.
Last shot of the day.
That's the Marley towel.
Can you tell just use a tiny bit of war?
Oh
Hate that I'm fucking running out of time. I actually hope to God that my poker coach isn't watching this. This is
awful
You're starving. Oh my god. You're right. I am
Wait, I think I know we can do it inside
I am extremely hungry. I'm starving really
Get this today
As well right give it to your aspects owner yes, of course
I got her prescription great paint. I was hoping to get some
all right I like this yeah that doughnuts had no dirt
with the bangi bingi and then he's going to line up like ten hot guys for me
gonna pick the hottest ones if you guys want to come in and look at the hottest
guys right yes we can do this
oh he would like this
I'm straight Sam
So what where's the next scene at work June we're headed to a y'all
Where so mr. Marker
Elevator he was but he got left in the elevator
Oh
Marco did you pull another prank soon? It wasn't me. I swear. Hey Marco. Are you stuck in there?
Yes, I'm sorry. I was on a call
It's all right, everybody listen up. Here we go
We are not going to be filming the art today
That's going to be pushed to tomorrow do just some scheduling conflicts
But I was thinking maybe we could get a last shot more team you getting back into your stretch limousine
Maybe on the way there. Oh, I mean fill that pulling away
And then that's it for the day guys. Thank you really work everybody. I'm proud of everybody
We could get a highlight of my assistant Molly my driver
Because I have one
All right, let's do that good work everybody. This is the martini
Let me get you guys out
All right Kevin really good work today man really good like my line deliveries were they
good they were very good Kevin absolutely fantastic you like Gosling man thank you yeah
I'm sorry I gotta you know get somewhere I'm just a busy guy unfortunately no worries
I just need to go to the bathroom.
No, it's not.
Fuck off and die.
It's okay.
Get this video.
Get this.
This is a good video.
It's not fucking up open.
Fuck off.
What?
What?
Get the fuck off of me!
It's a long time.
It's a long time.
What the fuck am I doing?
Get out!
What do you want to fight? You want to go?
Let's go!
Let's go!
Get out!
Molly?
Molly!
You know what to do.
You can stay behind.
What's up, Jim?
I can't believe I'm getting shot by that!
This is the final fight!
I AM PENVIDED!
YOU LIKED ME!
I AM PENVIDED!
Get in the tent!
Ow!
S-S-SAND IT!
Get the fuck on the floor, you son of a fucking bat!
Oh shit! Get that, get that, get that zero!
That was shit!
Did we get that? Did we get that?
We got it, alright folks!
Hey man, quick council here man, hey, uh, Dr. B, uh,
So I'm gonna take a look at my sticker with the numbers on it.
Oh, you're a squire, yeah.
I know you're a snuff snuff, but you should be here.
You can be mad at me.
But I do be cocky for it.
I'm not cocky with my golf balls.
But it's also sick and we get a lot of favorites.
I can't feel anything.
The lights down.
I just smoke the same red.
I'm gonna take a look at my golf balls.
I'm gonna take a look at my golf balls.
Oh, you're a snuff snuff.
Yeah, the court snuff is really fake.
I went to a restaurant here.
I think they have a new ingredient.
I decided I didn't want on the burger.
It was the special sauce.
I know that.
You like to address?
I fuck bitches and do lots of drugs, yeah, all the time.
Oh, sir.
That's kind of flattering us, sir.
Yeah, yeah, yeah, I'll take your number, what's your number?
Hang on, let me go talk to the talent group that we knocked out.
Yeah, yeah, yeah, I'm a real doctor and a real lawyer, man, I do it all the time.
Okay, yeah, just you can prescribe me some, you know, good stuff?
Yes, ma'am.
Yeah, I can prescribe you good stuff anytime.
You do, man.
You work with a high-octane life.
Am I interested in that?
That's me right there.
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah,
I got your number. I'll be in contact for some you know
prescriptions
Great job out there Molly that was sick right wouldn't that awesome got my blood going that was all I can't wait to run this place
Mommy!
We're gonna crash you down!
She's dead!
You're a rap for today!
I'm yucking, I'm yucking, c-
Shut up!
Get out of the way!
Mommy, Mommy, get your car.
Get your car, leave us.
Kevin, get in the car.
Get in the car.
It's on!
It's locked!
Dad, it's locked!
I love you!
Who's really wanting to-
I'm locking!
I'm locking, hurry!
He's hurrying!
So, I'm gonna give you five seconds to jump out of there-
What?
...before I just make you jump out of your-
You understand me boy?
No, because that scene is for the male.
Roma Squammy, take this clown out of here and get inside.
Get the hell out of this guy's mind.
He can sit there now.
It's not your window.
You're still in the car.
Fire!
If I count to zero, you are permanently banned from the casino.
No, we're-
No, okay, okay, that's what has happened.
That's what happens.
Yeah, we miss you.
Exactly.
Hello, here.
We need Kyla.
I'm sorry, Mr. C.
Hello.
I appreciate you.
Kyla, we need Kyla.
Well, go back for Kyla.
I guess.
He's a nice guy.
Kyla, come in.
Hi, I'm Kyla.
Hi, I'm Kyla.
I'm Kyla.
Alright, uh, real quick, Miss Molly.
Let's go somewhere a bit more private.
Uh-oh.
Intentionally overdose on drugs. This is ridiculous
Yeah, that's a lot going on. We probably want to have make sure those clowns
Don't have the mass of them. Oh, I'm exceeding
This is a great car by the way
shut up
You mind opening the door for us
Mr. Mays, sir?
Hi, how are you?
Over here, in front of the lab light.
Okay.
Wait, is this a black light?
Is it?
I can't stand in front of it.
You do not want to know what I see in there.
I'm sorry, did I say that?
Oh, you're right, sir.
Oh, God.
Oh, God.
Oh, God.
Oh, God.
Oh, God.
Oh, God.
Oh, God.
Oh, God.
Oh, God.
Oh, God.
Oh, God.
Oh, God.
Oh, God.
Oh, God.
Oh, God.
Oh, God.
Oh, God.
Oh god.
Oh miss, my son, why don't you step on that side too?
Alright, what's going on dad?
This, my son, is a mayor.
Ooh, big shot.
I guess you could say big shot.
Yeah, me, a big shot, think about that.
The mayor of Los Santos considered a big shot, the most famous guy in town.
Hmph.
What's your name?
Oh, you're not the most famous.
I tweeted right now.
What are you talking about?
My social's got like, 5,000 favorites.
It's like, I posted it.
Just got here too.
Have you met the shaved man, sir?
No, I have not met the shaved man, Mr. Mayor.
And you don't know what the fuck you're talking about?
Yeah, okay, I was the most famous man of Los Santos.
He's not the most famous.
I'm the most famous.
I mean, my social's are the-
Wrong!
Say it as much as you want!
It's not true.
You
Okay, that's so no I'm not gonna fucking take that motherfucker. Uh-uh no
I put on the socials with a plane as anyone else put on their socials with a fucking plane
There's a plane in my profile picture a fucking plane
It's a jet it's a jet like he did get like 2k likes on that post on socials an omega virus
even I was impressed and I'm the most famous woman in the city.
Yeah, he's super seriously.
Yeah, he's actually famous.
Yeah, super serious.
He made an Omicron virus.
It was like Omicron virus.
Yeah, like that.
Oh my God.
Hi, nice to meet you.
My name is Vivek Rameskwamy.
That's R-A-M-A-S-T-U-A-M-Y.
And I love the eight fellow constituents.
How are you doing today, sir?
Nice to meet you, Mr. F***ing Mayor.
My name is Kevin Whippeloo.
The son of this fine gentleman, Mr. Cement,
were related by blood.
i don't think until
and i don't know that i didn't want to see them
you guys on the casino
but you run yes you know
yes i think you know i don't want to make it a big deal i think it's
that is
impressive you know i yet
there is nothing that i am like impress by more
business acumen and men who are about their money in the same age where
everybody runs the cast so like
you know hats off to you
i'm not going to take off my belt way because
pin into my head but that is just so impressive well thank you i've learned
that all the poor wagey you know
fuckers out here i've had jobs are whole lives and there are there it's
actually not that hard
i've had it all day it was fine so hard
believe you
thank you
i believe me to we talk business enough of this fucking
shit
let's talk brass tax
how would you guys like to sponsor campaign
Vivek Rameskwamy, sponsored by what's your casino's name?
Pixel?
Pixel Casino, sir.
Sponsored by pixel.co.ru.
We can be absolutely massive.
I mean, none of these other mayoral candidates even have a chance against me.
Wouldn't you guys want your name in light?
Your political figure, I take it.
Yes, I am, depends on who you at.
Not a question for you, are you aware of like a
Chris space in a gambling space in general?
I mean, I have an app on my phone and whenever I have a gambling
God damn, is that a great question? I would love to address it right now.
I believe voters like you should know my stance on this issue.
Specifically, I believe every day I gamble when I run my fingers through my freaking hair.
So of course I'm pro gambling, and whoever gives me a check at the end of the day, I'm gonna chill at each thing, you know what I mean?
Go ahead.
It's a pretty good answer, I'll be honest.
De-regulate gambling now!
I believe every child has a right to gamble.
They do!
They do, thank you!
The children yarn for the black table.
Absolutely.
Getting children, putting a stuff...
...of labor out of the mind of the casino.
Come on, come on, there's your brand-
It's true. The legislation rights itself.
You're right.
You know what stops Ad Gambler from losing his house?
A good gambler winning a house.
That's been since day one.
You're speaking to my soul right now, yes?
Absolutely, let's make it happen, let's chase him.
I mean, why can't an eight-year-old-
Wait a minute.
Why can't an eight-year-old hit a button on a slot machine? It's not hard.
Exactly.
There's so much visual stimuli just as much as most of the cartoons, you know, you know, serial commercial.
What's the difference? Both give an addiction, one just has a chance of economic prosperity.
Exactly. I have an idea that we can get behind in terms of legislation.
Introducing you slots for a day one regulation where we ensure every toddler
access to the slot machine
I mean we can even have your hired employees to push the you know the strollers
Daycare slots yes, the children's branded sheets in his name
Government will buy them from you through a stipend that we will give out to the children
Slots for Tots.
That's a great idea.
Slots for Tots.
We're talking fucking brass tacks here, Mr. Robert Squammy.
You want us to sponsor your campaign.
Now how do you envision that?
That'll conspire.
I only know like three of those words mean,
but here's what I'm trying to propose.
Money.
What money do you do with money?
I know like four of the words.
What use money do?
I'm gonna be advertising like freaking crazy. I don't know if you guys around the city near the pores, but goddamn are these other mayoral candidates annoying as fuck.
Posting their ugly ass posters all over the place.
Wait, wait, wait, wait. I...
Pause. You said...
...Poor, right?
Yes. Pours.
Yeah, it's fucking disgusting.
Sure, I think you may have heard of it.
I know.
I'm not sure.
Disgusting sure. I think you may have a friend here. That's a fucking little like mine
I think a partnership might be put for my son and you
Hmm apps fucking Lutely, I mean
If you're gonna, you know push the agenda that we want, you know, we could push the the money that you want potentially
The big Rama squammy sponsored by pixel casino dot are you
Let's make it freaking happen. Let's do it and we can go to a convention and re-op and talk about it next year
You me and the freaking Saudi crown prince. How does that?
Will say
Well, I'm false false. Oh, sorry. Okay. I had those good diligence in some study. We know our political figures tend to get involved in this type of
Vocation that's a world. There's a notorious figure that goes by the name of a
You know, Sprunkzilla, and he's just some financial guru or some influence, I guess,
and he catalogs people that get those types of deeds and exposes them out.
Now we don't want that to happen to you, now do we?
No we don't.
You're right.
Because those videos do do some numbers.
Yes, but I have a counter to you.
Considered I apologize before I do the action.
Therefore, I stand up strong.
Oh my god! Oh my god! Oh my god!
He's infected by the woke mind virus.
We need to get him help.
Quick! We're gonna get this girl now.
I guess that'll conclude our meeting here.
How about you give your number over to my son, Mr. Kevin.
Kevin, I'll take your number.
I love you.
And our assistant Molly, Paul.
Yeah, give it to him.
I didn't share my number.
Go ahead, Molly.
Here you are.
Nice to meet you.
If I could just borrow your number for about two seconds before you pot.
I have a separate.
If you have some time, I am to be the oddest management for Brickboy Reckons.
And I want them to perform a casino debut launch party as an exclusive for their label debut.
You deal with some of the artists?
Yes, I'm going to be managing the label for them and I'm going to be getting the artist booked, so part of my hype campaign I want to do the formal label launch at the casino's grand opening exclusive contract.
Well, sir, what do you think about that having some opening performances by the brick boys? You make one of them today. Use your driver.
Who the fuck- fuck it, fine, fine, yes!
Alright, well, I believe I said you might contact me.
We'll be in touch, we'll be in touch.
It sounds good.
We're gonna have to prove free that apology, that free apology letter that you're-
It'll be really good, I even cry in it and have a dog on my lap.
I think we'll do quite well on the socials.
Alright, as long as you're not in the forest, let's go.
All right, what are the poor people their ravenous they'll haggle you for any
Yes, you got off from here right we got a medical emergency
We'll be fine, we'll be fine
I got a meeting in ten minutes
So do I take a burger shot or the hospital?
We'll take him to the hospital so he can get back on his bed
He'll sleep in the limo
I'll sleep in the car, it's fine
It's a nice car, I can do it
If you need to if you need to sleep over this instant right now
Okay, we'll try to make the most of it
But I'll just let you know if you were to fall asleep at the back of this limo when you wake up still be you know
Need medical attention. There's no medical attention yet
Shades you can do the emergency. I'll just go straight up just straight up
Oh my god, it's still in here.
Just do what you did with me.
I'll stay with the call.
I've never been here before.
Well, uh, hold your breath, son.
I just worry it's not gonna be fucking fast and I need to go quick.
You're so strong, Molly.
God, you're so heavy.
okay rude that's actually a compliment for a man you're right thanks right Jesus
Christ
Can I get some help?
I'm around the corner honey, I'm not a real doctor.
Wow.
Unless you want to pee be I'll come in.
This place is a massacre.
Oh my god, this is my first time seeing the what is it right back at the hospital you're not gonna end up like that
Okay, lay me down on one of the bits
Okay, you I can certainly what happened I got in a fight with an old lady and she beat the fuck out of me
But I overall won and I started starving
I'm starting.
Okay.
So you're hungry and you got beat the fuck up by a girl?
No, I beat her up.
I won.
So I'll just show up during hours when you win your own?
Yes.
Okay.
I have to tell you this.
You look like Jason, who's Allison's brother from the hit TV show Pretty Little Liars.
It's actually pretty.
Nice.
I have a meeting in 10 minutes.
Please God help me.
Oh, I'm helping you.
Don't worry.
You're going to be okay.
I'm going to get you some food.
Thank you, Molly.
Thank you, Molly.
You're going to be fine, Kevin.
Stop being dramatic.
You're going to be fine.
Am I?
Are you sure?
I've never been in a place like this.
Yeah, I'm just going to put an ice pack on your tummy because it was
really so hard.
It hurt your tummy.
Okay, so.
All right, we're going to do it right this time.
Oh, okay.
Kevin, I just, you're hungry.
I have food for you.
Okay, listen.
Okay.
I put an ice pack on your tummy because.
You can just call my stomach.
stomach tummy sounds like I'm a child you might be it's your tummy not a child
I'm a grown man 26 that's what they all say and then they act up feeling better
though right yeah I feel better okay have a lollipops help out of the bed not
for you Kevin unfortunately no you don't meet the quota okay well okay
You need help out of the bed? Yeah, you help me. I got it. I got it. Fine. I'm a grown man. I can do things myself.
Uh-huh. Yes. Good job. I'm proud of you. What was your name? Jason?
No. You should be. My name is Kevin. Oh, Kevin. Okay. You go get to your business meeting.
Or Mr. Quippaloo. It's fine. It's whatever. So I could deal. Molly, you got food for me?
I did, Kevin. I just gave you a burger. What? You did?
Yeah, I still want the food you brought me. What did you get?
I paid $150 for that.
How the fuck are these hot dogs $150?
Let's get the fuck out of this hospital. This place sucks.
Gotta stop walking like this. This is ridiculous.
It actually isn't Kevin. It's kind of nice.
You like this walk? Okay, well I'll keep it for you. Alright, you think it's cool?
Wrong door, wrong door. Okay, alright.
Come on, Kevin.
Okay, let's get back to the uh, the apartments
It was wonderful and he did look fantastic when he was carrying groceries, but I did I did end up divorcing
That's so that's wonderful. That's such a beautiful story
Right. I think he remarried a dentist dental hygienist or something. She she had massive bugs, but she just
massive all we talk I mean
That was the old lady that I beat up right
Yeah
So how much more time you have you gonna crash in the slimmer we need to take you to I got 15 minutes
I got upgraded well, maybe 10
I will just be real quick
We're too, sir.
Oh, I think back to me.
Do you not want to let Kevin sleep at the casino, sir?
Well, if he had a bit more time, he could see some of the models for the final shot.
I do not. I don't have the time. I do not have the time.
Stupid!
Oh, we're ready!
Why don't you drive off a cliff?
Unbelievable. Unbelievable.
I feel like they're all gonna gang up on me at the apartment to this point. The pores tend to flock together
All right, uh, tell you what son. I'm gonna have if Molly's sticking around just a bit longer
Are you here now too?
Sir
It was a lot I need to
That's fine. That's fine
All right. Well
All right, I'm gonna check out for the day dad. I'll see you tomorrow Molly was a pleasure. I'll see y'all
Fucking later
You can go you can go to bed as well
Okay, I need to fuck upstairs
All right, so I need to go what a what a fucking weird-ass day
Holy shit, this is not how I thought today was gonna be going
Um, but whatever. That's how this shit plays out. I guess I have a poker coaching session with Garrett Adelstein
Oh
Oh, dad's calling me
Yeah, dad, what's up
I'm proud of you boy
today all right I just want you to know that thanks dad I think you I think
you're gonna be able to handle this easy okay you know what I'm glad to hear
that I think I got this this is easy it really isn't that hard it really is
once you get the flow of things and I think you've got a good going on okay I
I love you.
Yeah, so cool.
Almost.
OK, I'm just going to alt-F4 here.
All right, I'm closing this.
Let me get my cam back on.
Let's lock the fuck back in.
What a weird whole situation.
Alt-Fucking-F4.
Disconnecting.
All right, poker session.
So I'm playing with someone named Garrett Adelstein.
He's going to set up a whole coaching shebang for me.
He is a famous professional poker player.
Where's my phone?
Hold on.
What is this?
Apparently this guy has like an audio book
or like a book he sells.
Okay.
That's crazy.
This guy's look crazy.
Garrett Adelstein, I don't know if I'm saying that right.
I don't know, he says he's tech savvy,
but he doesn't use Discord.
Garrett is so good.
Yeah, apparently he's like one of the best poker players
here is, period.
Coaching for what?
Poker.
So I signed up for a poker tournament.
I did this a long time ago,
and the date just happens to collude with GTRP
and wow forever, unfortunately, but it is what it is.
and i have a one-to-one of poker versus ex-qc
uh... we haven't scheduled the date but it's probably gonna be within the next
week
uh... collude that's the wrong word
you know what i mean
uh...
if i beat philix
i get fifty thousand dollars i think that's the number
if i lose i literally get nothing in it was a massive waste of time
uh... with the whole tournament and everything they want me to do a
coaching session with someone and they signed me up with
garrett adelstein
me let him know i'm ready in a second
or i'm ready whenever if you want to start early
uh...
if you don't want to say lost true
uh... felix is aggressive
i mean
uh... whatever it's a one v one by the way and then if i beat felix there's
another round and then there's another round and i think
i don't know the exact numbers i really don't but it's like five hundred
thousand dollars i can win it is absurd
money that i can actually walk away with
uh... yeah absolutely stupid said no shit i said yes
uh...
he's gonna get bored and all in on the third hand
again my brother ryan
he's a big poker guy and he's like to do chance you're going to get sexy this is
a free one he's he literally said what you just said he's going to go all in on
a certain and it's gonna be a joke
uh... so ryan also wants to coaching session
But today's with Garrett and I've never talked with this guy outside of email.
So this is going to be a couple introductions.
Let me, you know what?
Let me look this guy up.
Let's see Garrett Adelsine.
I'm sure there's some footage of this guy.
The most, this is 1.5 million views.
The most insane hero call in poker history.
Okay, this is him right here. This is the guy he was on survivor. I think you might have been
What is a round of straddle? This is a 15 minute video
This is the hand with Robbie when she cheated someone cheated. I don't know what a hero call is
It's a raise without looking at your cards, so we've got the 800 straddle on here
How do you cheat? How do you even cheat in a setting like this?
You get a double straddle. There's a lot of people.
Each one of these chips is $100, I'm saying.
We should go around the table and everybody tell Phil their favorite Phil
ID moment please don't let's go down the table
So my favorite moment was I think when Jason mercy it first came on the scene and then you guys
I don't have six poker you came in like wearing like all this like
Like really weird like they had like sunglasses on and like I think I was like the first time you're playing with him
And like you just had this look on your face like who the fuck is this kid?
And he bought him for like a hundred Ks, two hundred Ks, something like that.
And you guys got on the hand were like, you had like nines.
And then he had like ace four suited hearts, I think.
And like he flopped a gutter with hearts, I think.
And then you guys got it in and like, you like won his big plot off him.
And he came in with like all this cash coming on the table.
You remember that?
And then you're like, there's like a second hand in.
And then like you beat him in that pot and he's like,
I'll see you guys later.
I just want to see like how someone cheats in this game, right?
Okay, so here's Garrett
Okay, we bet 300 wait raised to 3k wait what what are these numbers?
I
Wow Robbie really mixing it up here calling Garrett's raised with Jack four off wine versus wine and
Okay, so eight seven eight of clubs versus Jack of clubs and four Garrett here's floppy straight flush draw
I didn't see this over here
Neither one of them has anything
He's gonna bet 2,500 close to flush true. He just needs one more club
Oh and Robin's gonna go for it with the Jack of Clubs. So what he wants is a three turn is a three puts back your hearts down
And this is usually when Garrett will lay the hammer down. Oh my god almost a straight flush by the way dis I even noticed that disgusting
guys. Okay, still neither one of them has anything. He's gonna bet 10,000. I think
Robbie should have probably been out of his hand pretty far.
She's got a one club and one heart and wow look at this. What is she thinking
about here? She's gonna raise it. We saw her raise ace. It's just chip count not
a real dollar value.
For a min-raise, here she's got a min-click,
jack four, and you know Garrett is just so experienced.
Nobody hold on to me, scratch my face.
That's the shit I got.
How often would she do this with a 10?
Could he possibly bet through that here?
I mean, she just min-click the turn.
It's real money as it's showing dollars or normally that means it's real.
So I think that's what's got to be going through his head here.
I think he's considering that free bet and yep, there's the all in.
All in.
There's the all in.
Garrett, like I said, he's just so experienced in that pattern.
patterns that size
sort of acted a little bit with jacquita diamonds from a few rounds ago
just gonna put a kind chip out
they don't have it, neither one of them has it anyway
She said that she thought Garrett had a draw that a few of about 20 minutes ago
Garrett had the full house the Queen for against Jackie
She's winning that she took some time with it. And then she has Jack high right
I just want to call to see it. I think he might have any more.
Three smell good?
This is why you should be hands like this.
She doesn't have a three.
So...
Do you want me to call you?
I don't know what she's thinking about here because she loses to some bluffs like
Rikken, Queen, Queen Jack types of things too.
I don't know.
Should we order for you?
I call.
She calls?
I'll play.
For once, but it's up to you.
Oh my god.
Let's see what you do.
So far so good.
You're here ahead.
What is going on here?
For once, but it's up to you.
What is going on here?
It's up to you.
Is it possible that her hand might be misread in the card graphics or something?
They don't even...what?
Because I have a shitty hand.
You do?
Yikes.
You always talk to me.
No, this is a pure bluff, Captain.
With Jack High?
But, but, yeah, I don't, I don't have, I think he has to.
I go to the river, the river is in nine.
That one's new for sure.
They're gonna run it twice in, she's good.
Do you have like a small pair?
Yeah, she's good.
She wins.
Do you need any namaskara?
I don't know.
She's good with the first one
Is this like highly controversial
Okay
commentators
Whoa, that's look at Garrett's face that is
That is super super strange you can see his reaction
She gave the money back
He's not even still here, he's so mad.
Do I even ask him about this?
This is the first video I click.
I'm speechless, I'm speechless.
Usually Garrett would be fairly congratulatory if somebody made a hero call like that.
He seems somewhat disturbed here by what just happened.
I don't know.
He's still stun locked.
This is an insanely long stun lock.
And obviously the reason why he did that is how can she call.
How can she call thinks that she she saw his hands on her so I don't know
The flockers that call the turn goes that way show
Sort of what's happening
I guess they just kind of talk about it. All right, Garrett's ready. I got to call him. I was gonna look into more
Let me call this guy and
Yo Garrett nice to meet you man, man. Yo, how you doing, man? I'm doing all right
I mean, I suck at poker. I was you know, just watching some videos of you
The old the video that popped up with some hand versus a jack three. I think it's something that I don't know some hero call
I don't know what that means
That was the first one. I called you up
And yeah, I mean I'm ready to learn some poker
Nice, let's do it. I so what I'm looking at right now is just like a video feed of me. Should I on I?
I'm showing my screen here. So this is my desk another screen
Should I have like your full twitch thing going up or not even doesn't matter?
matter. That doesn't really matter. You can have it up if you want to see my chat. If
you want to see what they're saying. Okay. No, no, I'll do it. I'll probably just distract
me. Okay. All right. Sure.
All right. All right. So, uh, so I got a bunch of people messaging me. Obviously, like you're
just like massive, you know, so people are like, dude, he's playing the jack forehand.
And there's like, oh, I was watching it. I don't understand what's going on people in
his chat. It's just, it's just so funny, man. Like the, you play video games, right?
Yeah, I just play video games. It's pretty much all I do.
I mean, I know how to play poker, but I'm not good.
Yeah, I'm horrible. Yeah, yeah, yeah.
So yeah. So so I like I mostly play live poker now.
But my whole like the first almost decade of my career was all online poker.
Yeah. So back back by when you were very young,
like that's all I did. You just lived online, like everything was online, too.
You know, there was a website I played on.
It was not real money.
And I was like eight years old.
I played it a lot.
Actually, this might have been 20 years ago.
I don't remember the name of it, but I played poker then.
Again, I'm horrible.
I get really impatient.
I don't know when to fold, and I usually go all in, and I shouldn't.
Okay, all right, so here's, all right, should I call you Soda, Soda, Pomfiner?
Call me Chance.
What do you like, Chance?
Chance, okay, good.
I much prefer that.
Yeah, I agree.
All right, Chance.
So I think we should generally go about this one of two ways, or we could split the difference.
Way one would be just go for max entertainment for all your viewers.
Way two would be max like try to get the most out of this hour so you can get this money.
And way three might be something like splitting the difference.
What way do you think we should go with this?
Honestly, I think entertaining is more fun and I think I'll be able to pick up like again,
I know the basics of poker and you know, I know, I don't even want to say I know anything
because God, you're just, you're going to be such a higher level that I'm just going
to sound stupid.
Yeah, no dude. It's all good. What won't like I can meet you where you're at. You know, so well, we'll get
figured out and play the game called the main thing you need to do dude is Fade Boates, right? Because she's like
she's like a legit poker player. She's in this field of eight, right? Yeah, my brother Ryan is he helped me set
this whole thing up and he's he was so happy that I wasn't going against her as my round one. It's fuck. It's
XQC. So is she okay? Oh, yeah, I see. I know he's also a massive name in the video game world.
Yeah, good at poker. You know,
and my guess is he's going to be the same level as me, but he's also really impatient. He's going
to go all in on round three or sooner. Okay, I got you. I got you. He's a psychopath. All right.
Yeah. So it's like, you know, when we were chatting offline, like I sent you some preflop
charts, like we don't, we don't need to, uh, can I swear on here? Yeah, you're completely good.
Yeah, okay. Yeah. Yeah, we don't need to fuck with pre-flop charts or anything like that
You know, we'll we'll keep it light. We'll keep it fun
So what I think we should do just so we have for your audience like a constant game going is I have an opponent set up for you
He's like he's a good poker player. No doubt
But I've specifically instructed him to play in the way that he thinks your round one opponent is gonna play
So like around that skill level like an idiot basically
So that's how we'll do that. So, um, so do you have the, the world, uh, the club WPT
gold, like app and everything ready to roll?
I do not. I have nothing. So fresh computer, you just got on it. How do you do this?
Okay. So let's, let's get that going. And I've got my guy in the background here, uh,
who can help me as well with this, but, uh, it's like, uh, just open a browser, I guess.
And then on the WPT Gold platform, the website's clubwptgold.com.
Clubwptclubwptgold.com.
Yeah, dude, this is so funny to me, too, because like this is obviously your life, like your
live streaming all the time, but like, I'm so meticulous with planning normally.
So this is a lot of fun for me that we're just, we just kind of send it.
So I remember making an account with my brother here at one point, you log in with your phone
number. Yep. Okay, I did do this. Well, maybe I even have the app, actually, I mean, I just don't
remember. Okay, and then just he just does one thing, move to a different window for two seconds.
So your audience doesn't see your phone number. Yeah, I moved it. Okay. Yeah. So yeah, log in with
your phone number and that should once we're in, it'll be really easy, but okay, it's verifying
things. Okay, so tell me a little on the app, right? Once I'm the phone number doesn't
I'll check, yeah, he's watching live, so he'll conform, but I'm sure it doesn't.
So as we're doing this, tell me, like, give me at least like 60 seconds or whatever on
your poker background so I have some feel for it.
Okay, you ever heard of a video game called Balotro?
I don't know video games too well.
If you name, like, old school, like, N64, Sega Dreamcast games, I'd be all about it,
but, you know, like, I'm a dinosaur.
I just turned 40 so I will not be too familiar with with modern games, but yeah, but go ahead
I'm 32 so I'm getting there
Okay, okay, so my background a poker like I said it played a lot of poker growing up
It was just a random app. It was fake money. It was I mean if you linked it
What is a website people used 20 years ago?
So party poker was the biggest party poker that was on party poker
I played that yeah, you know a couple hours a day for funsies
but I was again I was like 12 and I downloaded zero information um and then
I felt that you were playing at 12 though. Yeah I thought I started at 16 man 12 that's
that's nice yeah yeah I mean my dad would play it so I would this is another app uh at the time
and then like were you just playing I can't even remember if they had played money were you playing
the playing money games or were you just busting out his card and just playing like small stakes games
I think my smallest node new zero real money none. Okay. I'll play money. Got you. I'll play money. I'm 12
And I'm just wow. I'm playing with people online. Well, this is when you know, it was cool and wow
Someone's online with me
That's probably why it was kind of more fun and then aside from that
I played it Bellotro is a lot of poker. It's the foundation of the game is poker
Um, so I understand that's crazy. Yeah, I love it
So it's like, I'll give it a name, like a game I do know a little bit, like StarCraft.
Like I don't know the strategy, but the point is the game you're playing, it's not like
a first person shooter.
It's like heavily strategy based than it sounds like.
Yes.
Well, it's a single player, oh god, I'm gonna start throwing gamer terms like a roguelike.
But the point is, you know, you had to build a flush, you had to build a straight, you
had to do all that.
So I know all the different combos in poker.
I don't know where to fold.
I don't know the percentages of how lucky I am, things like that.
Do you know, uh, like what a flush is?
Yes.
Yeah.
I'm going to know all the colors.
Do you know if a straight beats a flush?
A straight beats a flush, right?
A flush beats a straight.
Oh, fuck.
Super.
Dude, it doesn't matter.
The only thing that matters is I have some sort of feel for, uh, for
where your level is at.
Okay.
So we're going to, we're going to keep this shit super, super basic.
Okay.
Okay. So with that said, all right. So go into the tournaments tab here in blue.
Okay. Clicking then click heads up, sit and S. N. G. is what it'll say.
So yeah, unselect all these like type, unselect, see where it says all.
Oh, just yeah, whatever.
You just do it that way. Yeah. And then click sit and go.
That one, the one on. Got it.
Sit and go. You got it.
Okay. Yeah. And then, uh, let's see. Uh, and then heads up, sit and go.
Uh, let's see. He'll tell me how to do this in one second, but you're good.
Let's see. We need, we need heads up, sit and go.
Poker champs, warm up room.
Let's go there. Let's see. Oh, there it is. All right. Nice. Open that thing.
Okay. Yeah. Yeah. Okay. Hit register. I think, I think which is going to work.
I'm pretty sure it's buying. Yeah. All right.
The guy you're playing, like I said, he's a he's a professional poker player.
He also does like a million other things, but he's playing like he's going to play like a moron.
Yeah. Here he is. Yeah. Oh, fuck. Yeah.
All right. Patches. We're about to fuck patches up right now. Excellent.
All right. So I'm going to use a word. It's called structure. These are the blinds.
So it says 200, 400. You're the 200. He's the 400. Are you familiar with blinds and how that works?
It's a forced bet every hand, so there's still something like that, but I don't know exactly how exactly so let's just go ahead and click to raise 800 here. Keep it real simple here for now. Um, and then raise. Yeah, yeah, yeah, click.
I'm going to turn this down. Ow, that killed my ears.
And so basically what we want to do, like when we're on the button, is we want to be playing like almost every single hand, because we have such a huge advantage.
So this is a really bad flop for us. We don't have anything. We could try to keep it a little bit more simple here when we have like no shot.
We don't have a pair. We don't have any chance of making a flush. Let's just go ahead and check this time. Okay.
So isn't 2-7 like the worst combo you can have?
have. It's a word combo, but also like we put both of our cards are spades.
That means our hands suited.
So we could just fold.
So it's like this guy's coming at us.
So we'll, we'll, we'll get him.
We'll get, we're going to trap his ass.
But so we'll fold here.
We have nothing.
We have no pair, no draw, no chance of making anything.
It's like we're calling with Jack high here on the turn.
There's also three hearts.
So what if he has hearts?
Yeah, exactly.
So there's just, there's no point to continuing this one.
So this hand also, like most hands in no limit, Texas hold them really bad,
But Queen 6 out of position is good enough to play.
So let's go ahead and call here.
Okay.
He's actually like, he's like raising to 2.5x.
Like he's doing all this pro shit, but it doesn't matter because we just flop trips.
So when we call a raise, let's always check, okay?
Because like our opponent is saying, I have a good hand.
So when we're out of position, like we are now, we'll just always check first.
And it'll also say to him that I may not have the queens, right?
Right.
Exactly.
just check everything. So mostly it just like that way he doesn't know anything
about our hand. Okay, now let's just go ahead and raise here just to like feel
him out. He's gonna never think we have much. So we want to make it maybe like
three acts what he does. So you're using like those are really big numbers. So I
would just type instead of scroll. Yeah, just make it like 1200. Okay. Yeah, always
just type the scroll things. Yeah, that is a crazy scroll. Yeah. Okay, so he just
quickly calls. He probably doesn't have shit and we just made a full house.
So why don't we just try to spread them up here? Let's just,
let's just bet like, uh, bet like a thousand.
This is totally mess with it. Okay. Yeah.
So we'll bet a thousand here and we'll see like what he does. Okay.
All right. Now he raises. Well, yeah.
Like he doesn't really have anything here.
Why don't we just like raise again and see if we get him to do something stupid.
So maybe like, can you spam raise?
What's that? Can you spam raise like if we just went over and over I can keep raising over and over?
Totally unlimited number of raises, but that doesn't it like no that doesn't actually ever play out like that, you know
All right, so he calls. Why don't we definitely?
Why don't we check now because he's kind of pretending like he has a really good hand
So let's just check and we hope that he like with his confidence is like oh, he has nothing. Let me go again. Oh
Yeah, yeah, okay now. We just like we obviously raised we have like a huge hand
So right now before we do anything
What what are you signaling given all this crazy stuff that's happening is he has a really good hand here?
And so we want to try to get a lot of value from him. So I think we just make it like 50,000
50,000 actually has something good like a queen. He probably won't be able to fold and then he's probably bluffing so
Okay, he had something good
Yeah, he's queen, that's like, that is absolutely insane, like an insane cold deck.
We just assumed he was bluffing us.
So why don't we just keep doing what we were doing before, preflop to make it really easy.
Let's just make it raise to 800.
First of all, then you can only click that one button.
And then second of all, like, it's a perfectly fine raise anyway.
And again, we're trying to see what's-
So why is it to get raised and profused?
Okay, just because like, when we're on the button, like, every hand is playable, basically.
So there's so many complicated things in poker
that we should just try to do some things really simply.
So we can just minimum raise is what that's called.
Min raise the button every time.
So this time we have something.
We have a gut shot straight off of five comes.
So let's go ahead and bet twenty five percent of the pot.
You can just click that twenty five percent button.
Oh, I didn't know there was a little faster.
It's a little faster. Yeah. OK.
And that could just be like your strategy.
Like for let's say three out of four flops when we raise the button
He's probably mad. He's probably gonna be playing way too hard on us now. Hopefully not but okay
So we still have nothing at all here and now we don't have much of a chance only a five
We could try to bluff again here, but I prefer we have more equity meaning we have more cards out on the river
That could give us a good hand
So why don't we just go ahead and check here because we only have a gut shot straight draw in this situation
Situation if we have that say like 10 9 of hearts. I'd like that again check. Let's check. Okay. Sorry. Yeah
Sorry, I'll be a bit more clear. No, I was distracted something. I was trying to get your camera captured onto the oh, yeah
I just got it though. Let me move it over here though. Okay. We're good now. I'm not distracted. I'm walking
Yeah, so now he's betting we don't have anything. We'll keep it real simple
We're not trying to find like situations where we're gonna raise rivers or whatever. So we'll just fold here
We obviously can't call. We can't even beat block. We of course would call eight high. That's literally it
Right. Yeah, so the only thing we can do is raise or fold and we've done a really bad job of trying to pretend
Like we could have anything good. So we have to fold if we were to raise like it wouldn't make any sense
So interesting. Well, this is good. We're suited. This is a pretty good hand
So we definitely want to at least call here. I think calling is usually the preferred play
We'll talk about when we get hands good enough to re-raise, but let's call and then what I think we should do is
because your opponents aren't going to fold before the flop.
Let's check always once we call the raise out of position.
So we check here.
Check always.
Yep. We don't want to signal that we like these cards.
Exactly. But we'll just check every time.
So that way when we don't have anything, it doesn't help us either.
So we could call or raise here.
But let's just go ahead and call in this situation.
We have a good but not great hand and he probably has nothing.
So we want to give him a chance to keep laughing us.
OK.
So we can go ahead and check again here.
So anytime we check and then call a bet out of position,
we'll always check again.
Because our opponent is trying to tell us, I have a good hand.
OK, so he checks and he does so quickly.
Now we definitely want to go for a value bet.
So I kind of like that 75% button here, 3 fourths the pot.
Our hand with top pair is definitely good enough here.
We're going to have the best hand very, very often.
Top pair.
And it's way better to bet here because we have a good hand.
If we have like an eight, we could check, but our hand is just way too good to check.
And once he calls, yeah, we're going to win very, very often.
So and as we're going through all this tough chance, like again, like, obviously,
ultimately, you're playing for a lot of money here.
Yeah, feel free to pick my brain throughout.
Like if you actually have like, well, I'm picking up on things like this.
And the fact you noticed he checked early.
So you're paying attention to how quickly they hit their buttons and stuff.
So that matters.
You're sure.
Yeah.
So let's just go ahead and again, I think we can just
race 800 on the bun every single time.
Let's make it really simple.
This, this decision is like almost the best every time.
So we can just keep it really easy.
So we don't have much of anything here, but let's just try bluffing at this one.
So we could just bet what, and we could just do 50%.
How often do you want to just bluff or is that just up to the personality of the
person doing it?
Kind of just depend on a few different things, but like the pure bluff we mostly
don't want to do.
We kind of want to have some sort of chance.
So yeah, let's do 50.
No pun intended, obviously, we do the 50% and like mostly want to have something like that can give us a like an opportunity to win here.
So we have like two clubs. There's one club on the board. So with two more clubs, we'd make a flush.
So our hands very bad there, but not not terrible. Okay. So this is one of the few hands we can just fold actually see two and a four off suit.
It's just like one of the worst hands will be dealt and we're out of position.
So we want to play like what do you mean out of position?
Um, oh, let's fold and then I'll explain that.
I wish there's a pause button.
So he has that dealer button that D, which means he gets to act last on every single
street after the flop.
That's a huge advantage.
That's why we want to just go ahead and make this $800 raised preflop every time when
we have that D or the button, right?
The dealer button.
It's all the same thing.
Got it.
Um, because we get to act last after each time.
So again, we can just raise to 800 here and every single time.
Got it. OK.
Unless it's like if I have the day or whatever
and I have that shitty two five offsuit or two four offsuit,
would I still raise?
It's close. You could do either way.
I think you should just let's call this because we have a good hand here.
I think that we should just raise with it every time because I think you're going
to struggle to know when a hand is like OK and worth playing versus like the very worst.
So this is a spot where we have a good hand and okay, straight draw.
We would never want to do anything except call here.
So really, really important weapon.
Yeah, folding would be awful.
Obviously, we have a pair and raising would be no good either.
I might have a question.
Because we're going to get too many hands worse than ours to fold
and too many hands better than us to call, right?
So obviously a good situation here.
We could do either way here.
Why don't we go ahead and call?
Like all year, we're mostly trapping him. Yeah, we have like a really good hand often
But there is an argument
Okay, now he checks. I think we should just go all
Here all no, no, let's bet. No, no, let's bet. Let's bet like what's in the pot
Let's bet 17,000 here
Once he checks like we have the best hand nearly always in this situation
Situation he's actually getting owned by the way these we almost have what are we called? It's all yeah
We there's no way he wins. He's got a little laugh
Yeah, we are we are chopping him up. Yes. This is disgusting
I wish I could tell you that this was all skill, but like we're running very good as well
So we're getting a lot of luck. Okay
Yes, okay, so there's only 25 like we can just go ahead and call here
But the point is the blinds have gotten a little higher and so the game changes a lot when the blinds get higher
And we want to go all-in more, but that's where it gets like pretty tricky
But we'll just go ahead and check here
What I think we really want to try to do is focus up mostly on post flop and then when we get it is a post
Ways
Um after the middle cards are out. Okay, this is Jack 10 four is out so the floor the first
Yes, exactly before the community cards or middle cards. We'll just fold here. We don't have anything
Really with an ace high
Yeah, just because this is on this board
He has so many chances even if he doesn't have a high beat to make something a straight a flush a pair
It's just gonna be very hard for us to win the hand. What I just explained is pretty nuanced
But yeah, so let's just keep doing what we're doing. So let's make this min race to 1200
You'll also notice that the blinds went from 200, 400 to now 300, 600.
We want to take a particular note of that throughout, okay?
Let's again bet this half pot is 50% here.
This is a situation where we're kind of just protecting our hand.
We have the best hand here a lot.
You could also check this hand.
I'm trying to think about how not to convolut the strategy too much here.
So one thing we want to try to be doing throughout here is figuring out
out how many big, so let's fold this. This is one of those hands that's very, very bad.
We don't have the G either.
Right, exactly. So we're out of position and our hand sucks. Let's fold. So he has
like 25 big blinds. The way you calculate the number of big blinds you have is you take
the biggest one, which is 600. And so you do that 15,000 divided by 600 to oversimplify
that's about 25 big blinds. We want to really try to be doing that math on our head throughout.
And then that helps us to decide how aggressively we want to play our cards.
Ultimately, really complicated, as you know, pokers are really complicated again.
But as the blinds get up, that's really what we're trying to do.
So let's, as usual, we'll make it 12 hundred.
And of course, yes, we have the two face cards with the king and the jack.
We have a very strong hand here.
So, um, okay, we missed here.
Okay.
And he just minbed bets.
I don't know what that means, but let's just go ahead and call this.
Our hand, like, can make a king, a jack.
We could still have the best hand and we're getting a really, really good price.
Okay. He bets 600 again.
Let's just go ahead and call one more time.
There's 4,200 in the pot and he only bets 600.
So we're getting such a good price here.
So this is a really annoying situation because we don't have anything.
Uh, now he bets like really small.
Um, and I think we should probably fold here.
We only have King high.
We can't beat anything good and he might accidentally be bluffing us with like ace high or something. We don't get to see his hand after do we?
We don't get to see our hands and that's one of the front-breaking things
Yeah, but if you started playing on poker live streams the way I did you go home at the end of the night you get to see them all
Yeah, that's one of the sweet things about playing poker on TV shows for years
I always got to find out what my opponent's had after we call that stream sniping
Yep, exactly. All right, so we'll call here. Obviously, we have a pretty good hand a queen and I'm both pretty good cards
And now if we're doing this math, it's like
18,000 divided by 600 so he has about 30 big lines again. We want to ideally let's check as always once we're out of position
Ideally we want to try to be doing that math almost always. Yeah, just see
Yeah, so this is a pretty interesting spot because we have a pretty good hand here, but
if we raise any re raises us all in we have to fold.
So let's go ahead and just call.
We have an overcard with the queen.
So if we hit a queen, that's great.
If we hit a 10, that's amazing.
Let's go ahead and check again, again, as always, when we check and call about will check.
And now if we hit a heart, we have the best hand as well, right?
But they can all say that.
Yeah, he bets this $3,600 here.
I think this is an OK spot for us to go all in.
We just have some pretty good equina.
Why don't we call?
Why don't we call?
Pretty close.
It's pretty close between raising all in and just calling.
That's a great card for us.
So let's try to think about what we want to do here.
Let's check again.
Check.
OK, so we want them to do the bank.
time and see if he wants to bluff at it.
We have the call now.
We have a queen eye flush, but I don't love it.
Really?
But we just have a pretty good hand at this point.
Why don't you love it?
I'm curious.
He might have the king or ace of hearts.
And the way he's played his hand throughout,
he's really what's called representing a good flush.
So a lot of times he had a good flush draw.
Again, like the ace of hearts or king of hearts on the turn.
And he's semi-bluff.
Oh my god, he is.
That's unfortunately what he had here.
So the good news is we still have like a greater than four
to one chip advantage, but either way,
if we would have raised all any,
he would have snap called us
because he had what's called the nut flush draw anyway.
So that's again, raised to 1200 here.
And again,
again, if we did the math here,
now it's 36,000 divided by 600.
So we're playing about 60 big blinds.
So let's go ahead and bet this 50% again.
This is a great opportunity to explain
when we have a really good hand.
Like anytime we have top pair with a good kicker,
let alone two pair or something on the flop,
let's just bet it every single time.
One of the traps people who are newer to poker get into
is they slow play big hands,
but what you really want to do instead,
we can go ahead and call here, very close.
Paul, cause Jack high.
Jack high, it's okay.
Yeah, it's okay.
We're getting a pretty good price.
If we folded here before the flop,
that'd be fine too, very close decision.
But going back to my last point, which is more relevant,
when we have good hands, we just want to bet them.
We want to bet them early, we want to bet them often.
We could check here as usual
once we just call the raise preflop.
And our opponents are probably not going to fold enough.
Like you mentioned, your opponent in the first round
is probably not going to fold enough.
So let's try to get a lot of money in when we have good hands.
So we can fold here.
We just have nothing at all, yeah.
Yeah, and we're seeing our opponent here. He's actually playing pretty well. We probably got him tilted up because we're being him so badly
But that he's probably playing like a pro now, but that's fine. We'll beat him anyway
Okay, like a pro too. I got you just tell me it's a press exactly right? Okay, so let's do what we've been doing
So now we got that minimum raised to 1600 here
And now again note the big blind is 800 so now we're playing about yep
Yep. So now we're playing about 45 big blinds teeth, right? So the strategy changes quite a lot.
Okay, pretty interesting situation here, but we've got a pretty good hand and it's suited.
Let's go ahead and call this raise. It's also worth noting that he only made it 3x what we did.
So that's part of the reason why we call here, because when we're in position and we're getting
a good price to call his raise, a lot of good things can happen for us. So this bet he makes,
We want to be thinking about pot odds all the time when we're playing.
I'm just going to oversimplify the numbers here.
He bets about 2000 into about 10,000.
That's a very small bet.
So we should not be folding much.
Of course, we're not going to fold a queen because we have a pair.
Right. Yeah. Call or raise.
But like I think we should call again.
Raising is like we're just saying we have a stronger hand than we.
Amazing card, right?
And what we don't want to do is like if we raise
and he goes all in with an ace.
It's a bad situation for us, right?
Or he gets a, could have a flush.
Yeah.
So he makes a small bet here.
I think this is a good spot for us to just raise all in.
Our hand is good enough.
It kind of looks like we have a draw when we do this.
And there's a lot of money in the pot already.
So I think that this is a good play.
Okay.
So he just goes on folds.
You can tell by the speed at which he folded.
He just had nothing at all.
Yeah.
Which is, you know, if we're playing lots and lots of
hours, it gets the same guy that'd be useful.
But of course we're just playing for a few minutes.
So it doesn't matter.
This is a call, right?
So here we have a suited hand.
So let's just go ahead and call.
Yep.
And you notice he makes it 2.5 XR raise.
So if he makes it 2 X, we call with even more hands than if he makes it 2.5 X, but.
Let's try.
Not a huge deal.
So as always, let's go ahead and check here.
And we don't have anything at all.
So he checks.
Um, so I think when he checks here, he probably doesn't have anything
like all that good, probably has an ace high or a seven or four lot.
So let's actually go ahead and value better hand here.
Let's bet 75% of the pot.
Okay.
The bet sizing doesn't matter like too much.
That's part of like, when we use those numbers, 25, 50, 75, it's just a little bit
fast.
We're bowling him with this one.
Yeah.
We're, we're definitely messing him up pretty good here.
Um, so as usual, let's do the 1600 here.
Okay.
What are we called?
Okay, pretty good hand here.
I think we just go ahead and bet.
Let's just go ahead and bluff at this one.
Let's just bet that 50%.
And if we hit a two, we make the best hand.
If we had an ace, we're going to have the best hand almost always two.
So he calls.
We could do either way here.
So let's go ahead and check it this time.
Okay.
Okay. And then after this hand,
I'm gonna have you play the next one yourself.
I'm gonna fuck it up, man.
Okay. Yeah.
So he immediately bets the whole pot.
This is pretty interesting.
We can win if he's bluffing in this situation.
Been on a single pair, it's just Ace high, right?
Yeah.
But I do think he's probably bluffing a little bit.
I think this one's kind of up to you.
Do we wanna make a hero call for the fans here
Should we just we called it instantly let's do it. Let's do it. He's full of shit
He wasn't he wasn't full of shit. Oh, yeah
Unfortunately, all right, so again, we're still destroying him. All right, so this one's gonna be all you okay
You play this hand and then after you street. I'll talk about what I think about your decision
Okay, we'll do that for a little bit. All right. I'm gonna call here because it's sweet. That's great. Yep
We have a suited hand pretty good. That's definitely what I would have done. Yep, okay. I have two diamonds
There's one diamond all I have is queen hot.
Oh, I could get a straight though.
I think I checked your number.
But what we talked about here when we call the raise out of position, we'll just check
every time.
Make it easy for us.
Yeah, I'm checking.
Yep.
Even if we had a good hand or a medium hand, it wouldn't matter.
So okay.
Now what do you think of here?
Well, he Ray, he did a bet here.
So I'm actually a little spooked.
I don't really have Jack shit.
I'll be honest.
I actually think I fold.
Okay.
I think folds pretty good here.
Yeah.
This is actually pretty close, um, but I think folding is best.
And part of the reason we want to fold here is cause he bet two thirds of the pot,
which is actually a pretty substantial bet size.
So we don't have anything and he bet kind of a lot.
I think folding is good.
Okay.
Okay.
Uh, here.
So now, uh, I raised 1600.
Yep.
Perfect.
Just click that.
We'll just do this from the button every single time.
Make it nice and easy.
Okay.
Well, now I've got some stuff here, but.
So what are you thinking?
I'm thinking I bet 800.
Okay, that works, yep.
I guess small little bet, maybe he calls that, it's not much, but I have a pair of 10s.
Sure, that worked, yeah.
You could also just bet when you bet the flop, bet that 50% amount every time.
So your opponent has no idea what you're doing, but yeah.
Okay, now what are you thinking?
Call.
Yep, I think that's the great play.
So folding any pair here, when he only bets 800 into 6000 would be really, really bad.
Now what are you thinking?
60, I think I call.
Okay, you could actually, I think call is the more standard play here,
but you could actually raise in this situation.
I think using, seeing these small sizes he has, you probably actually just have the best hand a lot.
He doesn't have any less than a key or two hearts.
Yeah, I think it's not so likely, but you could do either way.
I'll raise, I'll do a change.
So if you were to raise, if you were to raise, I'd raise like a little bit bigger size.
And he did end up having a king, actually, so we saved some money here.
It's pretty interesting, so he really kind of trapped us by using some really small
sizings to get that king in our situation.
Okay, well, I'm going to keep having you play the hands for a little bit.
Yeah, yeah, no, I like how you backseat each afterhand.
It's great.
So...
Yeah, yeah.
And then I can just explain.
So what do you think in here?
Queen high, I think it's a call.
Okay.
Pretty close.
I'm happy with the call here.
Yeah.
What would you do, Fold?
I think it's pretty close.
I think calling is just fine. Yeah.
Uh, and if you were to like just make it minimum like 1600 instead of 2000,
it'd be an easy fold. So yeah, again, once we call the raise out of position,
we'll check first every time. Hey, now what do you think in here?
Uh, he bet 800. I mean, I think I call.
Okay. Yeah. I think that that works fine. Um,
explain why you are going to call them.
because I have a queen and it's higher than anything on the board that's that
was the main reason you wanted the main reason you wanted to call is because he
only bet 800 into 1000 so the bet is so so small that we just don't want to
fold much you know yeah it's cheap so as usual as usual when we check and then
call a bet let's always check when the next card comes okay and basically the
thought process there is our opponent is saying hey I have something good and so
We don't need to like bet for him.
We can always wait to see what he done.
Yeah, this is a good fold.
Yeah, we don't have anything.
We don't have any draw exactly.
All right.
Six and eight.
Uh,
So remember, we, we have that, that yellow.
We got the D.
I just don't know if I raise or call.
I think I call.
Let's just raise it every time.
Okay.
Every time we raise it, it doesn't matter.
This is one of the strategies that's good with poker is we want to be unpredictable.
We want, we don't want to give any information about our hand.
So by raising the minimum each time, our opponent has no idea if our hand
before the flop is good or not.
I see.
Okay.
Now what do you think in here?
Uh,
on it bet.
Yeah.
Okay.
I like it.
And again, you could potential straight.
So that is, yeah.
So the problem with betting the minimum at this point is the the the pocket's so big that we give our opponent such a good price.
Yeah, so it's not a bad bet.
But I kind of like if we're going to bet the flop after raising for the flop if we use that 50 percent number.
Do I fall here?
And this one's pretty close to what I would call.
So the seven and five are smallish cards, but they can make a straight a decent amount.
Right. It's just it's a one dapper.
So pretty close again.
But I think calling is a little better.
All right
Okay, check so again, we'll check always yep after we just call the raise
How we doing with your audit that we losing them or they are they somewhat interested in the
Oh, I mean they're interested there
They're actually like typing what they would do, but I'm like I'm barely getting to read them too because I'm locked in
I got 30 seconds between each hand. Yeah, I got you. Yeah, dude
Well, you're playing for a lot of money here
So he checked and now you have an open and a straight draw, right?
So what do you think can you want to do with that?
Bet.
Yeah, let's bet it.
Yeah, we've got a pretty good chance.
Let's go for it.
Yeah.
And just the one thing is you keep betting the minimum amount.
Usually we want to use bigger sizing.
So if you kind of don't know what's a bet, let's just bet that 50% again.
Um, and yeah, but I would bluff here at this time this time because we
We don't have anything here and we've mostly had good hands when we back.
Oh, we folded.
We won.
We won.
Yeah, with nothing.
So this is a big part of playing.
Um, no limit.
Texas hold them.
Well, you have to bluff a lot.
Yeah.
Especially heads up when neither player has anything, right?
So again, uh, with the stuff we've already talked about, I'll just like make
it quick for us so we can get them more like faster spots.
Let's just raise to the 2400 here.
8-3 offsuit is right there with the worst hand we'll get, and now let's definitely fold,
right?
Because we have such a bad hand here.
But again, we're just going to raise the button every single time.
That matter would not take that button out of the D.
Yep, and every time we call a raise before the flop, we're first to act.
Let's check every time, okay?
So again, if we're calculating how many big blinds we have, he has about 42,000.
The big blind is 1,200.
So it's 35 big blinds he has, right?
So we could let's just call this time. We don't want to get re-raised. Yeah
Okay, and we have we have a pretty good hand here that definitely wants to see the flop
So okay, so now I'm gonna have you play this one yourself a pretty tricky situation here. Yeah, this is
So let's start with a check as always when we after we just call the raise pre-flop
Okay, so he bets half the pot this time. It's pretty cheap though. I think call
Okay, I think it's pretty close. I think you could go either way here
If he used one of his dumb, smaller, let's call, but if he used one of his dumb, smaller
bats like 1200, we would definitely call.
But the sizing he used, I think it's a little closer calling, I think is fine here.
Okay.
So as usual, when we check and call about, we're always going to check the next street.
In this case, that's called the turn.
Okay.
Okay.
And then now talk to me about what you're thinking.
Well, he bet a bunch.
I'll be honest.
I think I fold.
Yeah, this is a good fold. Okay, so let's fold but I do want to point out that the sizing he used
3000 into over 9000 is actually quite small here
So if we had a pair, I don't think we should fold even if we had ace high it would have been close
But I think we're just king high. It's fine again
I want us to be super super focused in on this the bet sizing our opponent using yeah
I'm trying to calculate we have a really really good hand here
So let's bet that 50% this time and I want to remind you of a rule we talked about earlier
Which is every time we have a good hand on the flop bet it every single time, right?
It's just a really easy rule we can use that's going to help us a ton because most of your opponents aren't going to fold nearly enough
Uh, am I opponent will never fold he's all in. Yeah. Yeah, exactly. Okay. So what do you think here? I'm thinking I call
Okay, that works out fine. Yep
And so once we get to this stack size here again 35 big blinds great flop force too
Yeah, we mostly kind of want to re-raise when we re-raise we want to be able to call an all-in if he re-raises all-in of that, right?
So again, we'll start with a check when we're out of position after calling the raise
Check when out of position. Okay
Yeah, and what that does is that way our opponent doesn't learn anything about our hand. Okay. Now. What do you want to do here?
I think I raise him
Okay, I like this. Yeah, we've got a ton of equity with the nut flush draw
Okay, so one quick thing here, let's not use that 24 sizing because it's way too small that 50% works fine
Yep, you could do that. It's you seventy five or the seven maybe the seventy five is a better size
It can be a I see it doesn't it doesn't a little it calculates the raise size differently than I thought it would
So yeah, obviously that worked right away, but that was really good intuition on your part. Okay. Yeah, basically
He made a really small bet. We have a hand that has a ton of equity. Let's go ahead and raise it. I like it
Always in the button so he gets no info.
Yep.
Okay.
This is trash for me, but it's still a good hand, right?
Yeah, we still have something kind of decent here.
Yep.
So what do you think in here?
I mean, I don't know if I should check or I should bet here.
Honestly, 75% bet.
Is that crazy?
Um, that works.
Um, he called surely doesn't have an ace.
Okay.
So now what are we thinking here?
This is an important situation here that we'll explain.
But what does your gut tell you to do?
My gut tells me to check, but I don't know why.
Okay, that is the right decision.
Let's check, and then I'll explain why.
Okay, so the main reason we check here
is because we have a hand that can beat a bluff,
but can't beat any good hands, right?
Okay, now what are you thinking here?
I call because it's cheap.
Really cheap, right?
So anything but calling here would be really bad
because you're getting such a good price to call.
Exactly.
What is it?
Oh, I won.
All right, there we go.
We win.
That was cheap.
All right.
Well, he's playing in a way actually where, like,
he's not bluffing too much.
Like, he's just like, he seems to be kind of playing
sort of straight forward.
I feel like I'm not bluffing that much either, to be honest.
Yeah, yeah.
Well, let's see.
But I think that that's going to be, yeah.
What do you think here?
Cawks is cheap as a plant that works.
Yep.
Nine, six, decent enough, very close decision.
But I think you're going to do well for yourself, chance by not bluffing too much.
Yeah.
Um, because I think your opponents are going to just not fold nearly enough.
I think that's going to be a good strategy for you as you move through the
round, hopefully as you play all three of the rounds in this.
So again, we'll always, yeah, we'll always start with a check here.
Okay, that's a pretty big.
I mean, I think I call though, because a pair of nines is good.
He surely doesn't have the ace.
That's right.
Yeah.
We're playing heads up.
Like when we have a pair, like you just can't fold versus one bet.
There's not enough players on the table.
Yeah.
Yeah.
So let's check.
But like he does make a big bet here.
He's been playing really straightforward.
It does seem like he's showing this pattern of like having a good hit.
Like when he bets big, having a good hand.
Now he uses the small size and we have a nine. I don't really think we can fold here
You know, it's worth it's worth just playing it out
I think so like if we were to fold here
That's called a hero fold and we just don't really know what our opponent's doing
I really don't want you to be doing things like hero folding in these matches because your opponents don't know what the hell
They're doing and like we really just kind of want to stick to the bread and butter as a result
So as usual, when we check and call a bet out of position, we always check again on the river.
Okay, and then do me a favor. Oh, he checked. Okay, so it looks like
Okay, so ain't you saying so he is kind of doing some random stuff
So he bet really big on the flop and he only had third pair. That's an important thing to know
It shows that when he bets big, it doesn't necessarily mean he has a big
Okay. Okay. So do me a favor. Click the, okay. Um, so, uh, so we, the blinds are so big now that he just moved all in for only like 14 big blinds.
And so with any ace, this is an easy call, especially ace, eight. So we definitely want to just go ahead and call here call this again.
Short-sec poker is just a totally different thing and so it just so happened he had an incredible hand
Yeah, this is actually quite unlucky
Um, we both for only having 15 14 big blinds to start the hand effectively
Uh, it's a very very unlucky situation. It was it was worth the risk for us
No question. Yeah, no question. Yeah, okay. Um
Yeah, I didn't call right
Yep. Yep. We have a king after you call here. Click your chip stack. Click where it says
150 400 for me real quick. Uh, chip stack. We're Oh here right under where it says your
name. There you go. Okay. You see, so this is what you want to do. So let's check cause
we're out of position. Um, this is what we want to do every time when we first started
a match. It does the big blind calculations for us. So all this time I wasted repeating
myself about calculating the big blind, the software does it for us. So yeah, so what
do you think in here?
1.4, I think. Fuck it out. Now I'm struggling to know how much that actually is considering
I wasn't here the whole time.
That's okay. Yeah. It's like 1.5 into 5. Easy call. Yeah. Yeah. That's a small bet. Less
than one-third the pot and we have a pair. No question we should call here. And then
again, we'll do what we always do if we just check and call a bet out of position, we'll
always check the next three.
Yeah.
Ooh.
Okay.
Now we got some really good here.
Yeah.
I'm thinking I raise.
Yeah.
I think we should bet here too.
What, what size do you like?
I like this.
I hit the 75% and I think that's great.
I think that's a great choice.
Honestly.
Yeah.
That's like, that's like exactly what I would have bet here.
So you're in the spot on here.
And we went like in this situation.
Yeah.
What, once like the turn goes check, check, we both check the turn.
You bet the right, like you just have the best hand, like almost always.
Okay, so now we only have 18 big blinds. Let's continue to do this minimum raise here.
There is an argument if we were playing a more advanced strategy to do different things,
but your opponents aren't going to know how to play this.
So I still think that we should just continue to minimum raise every time when we're on the button.
It's always going to.
Okay, now what do you want to do here?
Now, again, let's note that there's four big blinds in the pot and he only has 16 big blinds left.
So fourth of his.
It's not like some huge hint about what to do here, it's just something we really want
to be conscientious of when basically the money in the middle is an amount that's approaching
the amount your opponent has left in a stack or your stack.
Right?
So what do you think, Bex?
I think Bex are the straight, right?
Okay, you can do that.
Yeah.
So this is definitely just a bluff, but I think it's perfectly fine to do so.
I think if you created some really simple rule where every time you have a draw to a
straight or a draw to a flush, you just bet I think it'd be fine.
Okay, what do you think in here?
He went all in.
I think I fold.
That's good.
Yes.
Yes.
So when he has 16 big wines, that's just way too much to call an all-in in that situation.
Okay.
Okay, now if he were to do the same bet here,
I'd probably call it with a nine king suited.
Okay, but we are first, remember?
So we're just gonna do the first one.
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
So we just hit this.
And I think that probably would be fine, yes.
Okay, so let's just keep doing what we've been doing, yeah.
Oh, not ideal.
I think I check.
Okay, I think you could do either one here.
Part of what's good about checking is you have King High,
so maybe both you and your opponent keep checking
and you win.
Now what are you thinking?
I think I do a minimum bet, raise.
Okay, I want to raise here that doesn't really
accomplish much, but he bet really small,
and we could win with King High.
I think we could fold here or call, up to you.
I called last time, I want to fold this one.
Okay, let's do it, yeah.
Interesting.
of the reason like folding is okay is like if he has an ace or something like that, there's
no card on the river that can help us here. So man, this match ended up being quite a
battle here.
Okay, all right. So this one I'll tell you. So when we're out of position, we have less
than 20 big blinds left and we have any ace. Let's just go all in every single time. So
we can go all in here and then I'll send it. Why? Yeah. Part of the reason we do this is
because remember we're always at a disadvantage when we're out of position. So this is basically
part of why it's a bit more advantageous or good strategy, and let's again do our minimum
raise like we always do, to re-raise all in out of position because then the hand is just over.
Wow. Okay, how do we play this? Okay, now what do you, you could do either way here. What do you
want to do? I don't want to lose him instantly. I'll be honest. I actually think I, what if
I checked? Is that stupid? Okay. I think it's okay. No, I think that that's okay. I think
you could do either one. And part of the reason why checking here is kind of cool is because
he has so little left that like it's not so hard to just get all in by the river anyway.
Right? Yeah. Now what do we want to do here? Raise probably 75% of, no, not even. How do
I do cheaper maybe like this time I think we should call okay part of the reason I want to call here
It's because it's hard for him to have all that much in this situation
Um, and now remember there's three diamonds on the board here. So that's at least somewhat notable. Okay now
What do you want to do here?
Definitely raise I want to try and get more I think
Yeah, I think so too and I think there's so much money in this pot that I think all in is the best raise size here
Just send it again because because he doesn't have that much left
Feel bad
Unfun position to be in on there
This turn of it. So the the guy who organizes this like he's a friend like this is such a cool idea
He had what do you want to do here fold?
Okay, fold because like it's a bunch of people who don't really know how to play poker that well played for outrageous amounts of
buddy. Like I said, yes, instantly when it was offered.
Yeah. Like, yeah, you have like over $30,000 in what's called expected value.
Okay. So now I think in this situation, we only has eight big blinds.
We should just raise or fold every single time.
And this is kind of one of the worst hands.
Um, we're going to be dealt.
So I kind of think we should fold here.
So I'm just going to give you a little strategy here.
Once we're in these really, really small blind situations,
Just to give you a feel. But what I was saying is like, you know
Once you win the first match you have like over
$60,000 in equity like if you just like for like crazy amounts of money, it's it's it's stupid
It really is I love it personally. Yeah, you win you win a quarter million dollars if you win three matches, right?
What do I do here? He all in I'm in the I'm out of position. Is this a fold angle?
Yeah, so again, so he has tended blinds. What do you think of your hand?
Trash, unsuited, close, high tar, or high 10.
Yeah, I think this one's a really easy fold, actually.
Okay.
Okay.
Oh, we got a pair instantly. Like, is this an all-in-in?
Yeah, so again, I think once we're under 10 big blinds,
we should just go all-in or fold.
What do you think?
Obviously, we have a pair, so in this case, it's not even close.
We definitely want to go all-in.
We just take the free win.
Yeah, yeah, interesting. Okay. Now we're out of position. I think this hand is absolute trash. He all's in I fold
Yep. Yeah, and so once we get down to these like
Situations where neither player where the blinds are really high
We want to be paying close attention to what our opponent's doing, right?
How often they're going all in or whatever and that may make us want to call with certain hands more than others
But what do you think here? I hit the the raise button because it's suited. I guess okay. Yeah
So I think this time we can just go ahead and fold our hand is just so bad,
even though like we're getting an okay price.
But remember once there's less than like, well, he has a little bit more than
10 big blinds now.
So I think we can, we can kind of go back to the minimum raise thing that we were
doing before.
So this is a really good hand here, jack for offsuit, but I think you should
get it.
Uh, fold, I think you should probably fold anyway.
Yeah.
I think if you had a different coach, she might give you a different answer,
the system's correct.
Good one.
Shit.
Oh, OK, we got pairs of pairs.
We're so close to the finish line here.
So all right. So now we notice the blinds went up again.
So we has less than 10 big blinds.
We have a pair. What are you thinking?
Oh, I all in.
All in. Easy all in. Absolutely.
Yeah.
He called it.
Let's see what happens here.
All right. He got lucky.
Damn.
All right. Not over yet.
We're still just hanging on by a thread.
You got lucky.
Yeah.
This is brutal, dude.
This guy won't die.
God.
Oh, wow.
Pretty good head here.
Okay.
All right.
Um, this is crazy.
Yeah.
Um, okay.
I don't think he has like much here.
No, I think you probably would have.
Yeah.
Maybe let's, let's just call him here and try to trap him.
Okay.
We could raise like to like five big blinds, but let's try to be a little sneaky not a fun flop for us
But that's okay
Certainly, so we'll check as always once we just call the raise before the flop
And then if he oh he checks, okay, so now we just want to bet we just want to try to get the money in the pot
So I think we just do the 50% bet or 75 whichever you I hit 75. I'm like a 75
75 is good. Yeah
Okay, you called it
Right and so really bad river though. Yeah, this is um fringe. Okay pretty interesting
So this is a pretty standard situation in poker where like we want to just bet small and hope he just calls us
What could he have?
He can just have all sorts of one pair hands
Yeah, oh right. Yeah. Yeah, he can have a straight, but I like 25 percent
I think if we bet more than that
And careful because your your time bank is almost out too. We have to be careful of that, right?
Okay, now he just minimum raises us, which is really brutal. So we could do whatever here
I think in your games like you when you're getting this good of a price you probably shouldn't fold but like I
Personally kind of want to hear a fold here. I think we're never winning
I really want to see what I got to be as yeah, but I think against most of your opponents
You're gonna want to call in situations like that. Oh, it was bluffing
What I was just about to say is against your opponents in this match, so now we're down
to 10 big blinds again.
I think we can go all in here pretty close.
But what I was saying is whenever your opponent gives you a really good price, like in that
situation, because you don't know how they play, we want to just call almost always, right?
So when he minimized us, he was giving us like six to one, right?
Okay, and now we don't have anything here, so we can just go ahead and fold in this situation.
Okay, I just fold it.
So again, let's just go back to what we talked about before, though.
Whenever there's less than 10 big blinds, one of us has less than 10 big blinds.
We can just go all in or fold before the flop, mostly just go all in.
So I think this is a spot where our hand is good enough to just go all in in this situation.
Even though it's not that great, it's still above average.
And we've also seen a pattern from him where like he goes all in usually more when he likes
his hands.
What do you think is the most average hand so I know where the above average like is?
You know, they say Queen 7 is the computer hand, but your hands Queen 7 suited.
So that's quite a bit above average, right?
So here we have 10 big blinds.
Right.
Exactly.
Yeah.
And so you have a king and it's suited.
So again, less than 10 big blinds.
Let's go all in.
Yeah.
button. We can block too. Right. Yeah. So that's what he's got. Okay. That is. Wait,
what do we have? Oh, we have a flush draw. Oh, we chopped. No, no, we don't have kicks
with Jackson, the kid. Oh, we draw a queen. Yeah, six hand came to, I guess I'm blind.
Yeah, but like, there were two jacks on the board. So his six got counterfeited. Okay.
And so now we have an easy fold. Remember the difference between going all in and calling
all in is everything, right?
Yeah.
When you go all in, your opponent can fold, so we can bluff sometimes.
Yeah.
When you call all in, we just are all in, right?
So in this spot, we should definitely go all in.
Our hand is only nine high, but it's suited, and again, he's going to fold sometimes, right?
Yeah.
We're bullying.
So we want to go all in when there's ten big blinds way, way more often than we want
to call all in.
We could even go all in with the vast majority of our hands, actually.
And then now you see the blinds went up even more.
So now we only have six big blinds here, yeah.
So now we want to play most hands at this point.
So Queen high more than good enough to go all in here and whatever happens, happens.
Once the blinds get this high, there's just like a ton of lock and fall, you know.
Yeah, he's got a send-in or, yeah.
I think I won if he gets lucky here.
Oh, we win.
All right, nice.
All right.
And that's game.
That's crazy.
That was like perfect timing too, that also lasted like an hour, you know.
Wow.
So, that was great.
I'm trying to remember some of the key points.
I know, yeah, because it's like, again, we want to entertain your audience, but you're
playing for so much money here that I want to do my game.
No, fuck the audience.
Yeah.
So, I'm trying to think.
Exactly.
I want to like, so the key points, I remember you saying, I want to hit that bottom right
button, the raise, pretty much whatever I have the D in the hand, pretty much always,
actually unless it's like, yeah, so that's called a minimum raise, right?
Minimum raise.
That's like what that raise number, yeah.
And, and so we really only want to use that button before the flop.
Is that minimum raise button?
And let's just do that with every single hand when we have the D or the button.
The position, yeah.
It's just going to be, it's going to simplify things a lot, right?
And when we're out of position, we want to fold kind of like the worst hands, right?
Yeah.
But if we have like a queen high or we have a hand like
seven, five offsuit, even a hand that can make a straight,
we can go ahead and call with those, right?
Let's talk about a couple other things.
When we raise before the flop and our opponent calls,
assuming they check to us, right?
And remember when we call their raise
and we don't have the D,
we always just want to check every time, right?
Dude, I'm sure so much of your audience
who knows poker a little bit just keep hearing us say
when we don't have the D and they're just talking
So we love the deal.
We love the deal.
Whatever, dude.
I want to make sure you understand what I'm talking about.
Yeah, no, I appreciate it.
All good, yeah.
So we always want to check after we just call our opponents
raised before the flop.
But when we are the ones who raise before the flop,
we should do some betting, some checking.
If you want to oversimplify it, maybe about half the time,
I think would be kind of good, right?
And so if we have like a pair or second pair,
And definitely if we have two pair or more,
let's bet always, right?
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
If we have like any shot of making a draw,
so we have a flush draw, a straight draw,
whether it's an open ended,
where there's two different cards
that gives us a straight or one card does,
AKA a gut shot, let's just bet that as well.
And then what I kind of want you to do,
you could do either way,
but I think especially in your first round,
let's use that 25% bet sizing
when, uh, when we continuation,
that or when we back the flop after anything for thought.
Because I think, um, is it QTC?
Is that his name?
X QC.
X QC.
QC is perfect.
No, no, no, no, perfect.
That was just so brutal.
This guy's like, uh, an all night legend.
I can't even get his acronym right.
It's fine.
He's fine to mine.
Anyway, um, I think that 25% bet is good because he may not
understand POT odds.
Are you, do you feel like after talking today, you have an idea what I mean when
I say POT odds or should we go over that one more time?
Uh, go over POT odds one more time.
If you don't mind.
Okay.
No problem.
So POT odds is the amount we have to call in relation to the amount in the pot.
Right.
Okay.
So let's just, let's just use even numbers.
So if there's four big blinds in the pot and our opponent bets one big blind,
right?
Now, there's five big blinds in there, right, including it's the four plus one.
So we have to call one big blind to win five big blinds.
That's exceptionally good pot odds, and so we shouldn't really fold all that much, right?
Sure.
It's worth risking, like, lesser hands during those.
Exactly, exactly right.
Yeah, whereas, like, if there's four big blinds in the pot and he bets four big blinds,
AKA the size of the pot, now we're only getting two to one, right?
Cause the four plus four equals eight.
So we have to call four to win eight.
So because of that, we want to be a lot more selective with the hands that we have.
Even if you just mastered that concept and understand that the, um,
worse your pot odds, the more selective we need to be before we call,
even that's just going to like help you tremendously throughout these matches.
So I mean, the other thing coming to mind, well, the only other thing was you were saying you always check after some type of raise or something.
And I was trying to remember what that situation was.
Yeah. Yeah. Let's talk about a couple situations where to simplify, we'll just check always.
So your opponent has the D or the button.
Yeah. He raises you call, then the flop comes or the three community cards.
Let's check there every single time.
Okay. That's where you take every got it.
OK. Yeah. All right. Now I'll give you a couple more.
Let's say
that happens and then he bets the flop and then you call.
Right. At that point, then the turn comes right.
The fourth card.
Let's check that card every single time as well.
In both of those situations, it's the same concept.
The concept being my opponent is saying he has a good hand.
So I'm going to let him decide whether he wants to keep betting or not.
That's really what we're kind of trying to say in English by betting instead
To oversimplify it's just kind of not really necessary
It's called like stealing the betting lead from him
And it's just like an advanced thing that you don't really need to do and you're probably more likely to make a mistake than not
And if you just do it the way I described
Instead where when we're out of position and we just check we're not telling our opponent anything about how good or bad our hand is
That's like the huge advantage of doing that.
The biggest thing about poker is it's a game of trying to deceive your opponent, right?
And so at all times, one of our biggest goals is making sure our opponent doesn't really
know, you know, what we're up to.
I see.
And having the consistency, they'll never be able to read anything off it if it's just
consistent every time as well.
For sure.
For sure.
That's why a couple things we've talked about, right?
Where when we have the button, we min-raise every time.
When we call our opponents raised before the flop, we check every time.
and we call our opponents bet and we're out of position,
we check the next street,
whether it's the turn or river every time,
we're at least doing a few little things
to not give away any information.
It sounds to me like we're breaking this down to a script
and we're letting them fuck up.
Exactly, that's actually, that's exactly right.
Because honestly, like to put in perspective,
like most of my students like pay me $1,500 an hour
for coaching and they've been like professional poker players
themselves for 10 years plus.
bring this up only to just illustrate how insanely complicated poker is and so we don't want to like
get into the weeds of like yeah complicated. No this is the best optimal noob strat that gives
me the best win conditions. Exactly that's exactly right yeah I understand you said that exactly
right yeah okay cool all right well it was awesome talking with you chance well Gary like I would be
will miss if I didn't quickly plug my book here go for yeah I think it's crazy you have a fucking
book. That's crazy. Yeah, this was just released two weeks ago. The long story short man was like,
I played professional poker for like 25 years and it eventually just kind of grinded me down. I
want to do something different. And so writing this book was a huge passion project. And it's, I mean,
dude, it's gone so well, man. The reviews so far have been glowing. How long did it take you to
write that? I've never written a book. That's crazy. Four years, man. And I have a three-year-old
than a one-year-old at home, too. It was just like something.
Oh, so you started writing the book before your first kid?
Yeah, I started writing it while my wife was pregnant with our first child.
Yeah. Well, yeah. That was a very short but very pleasurable one hour. I appreciate you coming in.
I did download a lot of the knowledge and good news is it's a VOD so I can go back and I can
just rewatch it if I forget anything. Yeah, definitely rewatch it. You have obviously my
Discord my phone number now hit me up if you have any questions. Do me a favor at least text me the results of each of your rounds
Oh easy. I'll let you know man. I'm your pupil. I'll let you know
All right, if I get I will not be texting you. It's too bad
All right. Thank you so much. You have a good night man. Appreciate it. We're you too later, dude
All right stream
That was a coaching session with Garrett you saw his book. It's fucking crazy. He has a book and shit
I don't know when my match versus X QC will be
I'll have my brother Ryan is very adamant. He he loves poker. He also wants to do a coaching sesh and
I'm gonna hope that he doesn't you know tear apart any of Garrett strategies because Garrett's gonna be better than him by miles
So I have another coaching sesh with Ryan and I'll be doing that before I go against QTC
I need to talk with Felix and we have to schedule a date. We have a deadline. I think the deadline is before the 24th
That's not confirmed so it'll be some time before the 24th
It just depends on his schedule and my schedule and where we're at and I got to talk with him
I'm sure he knows so I'm gonna wrap up the stream there
That was a lot of fun everybody. I hope you have a great night. I appreciate you watching tomorrow is a GTA fucking RP day
That's the plan just about all day. Thank you guys very much. I will be on tomorrow
You guys have a great fucking night peace out and all that jazz